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PLAYS 

BY 

ALEXANDER    OSTROVSKY 


PLAYS 

BY 

ALEXANDER    OSTROVSKY 

A   PROTEGEE  OF  THE  MISTRESS 

POVERTY  IS  NO  CRIME 

SIN  AND   SORROW  ARE  COMMON  TO  ALL 

it's  a  family  affair we'll  SETTLE 

IT  OURSELVES 


V 
A    TRANSLATION    FROM    THE    RUSSIAN,    EDITED    BY 

GEORGE   RAPALL  NOYES 


NEW  YORK 
CHARLES  SCRIBNER'S  SONS 

1917 


COPTRIOHT,    1917,    BY 

CHARLES  SCRIBNERS  SONS 


Published  September,  1917 


10  30 


3337      , 

1317 


PREFATORY  NOTE 

The  following  persons  have  co-operated  in  preparing  the 
present  volume:  Leonard  Bacon  (verses  in  "Poverty  Is  No 
Crime),"  Florence  Noyes  (suggestions  on  the  style  of  all  the 
plays),  George  Rapall  Noyes  (introduction,  revision  of  the 
translation,  and  suggestions  on  the  style  of  all  the  plays), 
Jane  W.  Robertson  ("Poverty  Is  No  Crime"),  Minnie  Eline 
Sadicoff  ("Sin  and  Sorrow  Are  Common  to  AH"),  John 
Laurence  Seymour  ("It's  a  Family  Affair — We'll  Settle  It 
Ourselves"  and  "A  Protegee  of  the  Mistress").  The  system 
of  transliteration  for  Russian  names  used  in  the  book  is  with 
very  small  variations  that  recommended  for  "popular"  use 
by  the  School  of  Russian  Studies  in  the  University  of  Liver- 
pool. 


1 "74852 


CONTENTS 

PAGE 

Introduction 3 

A  Protegee  of  the  Mistress 11 

Poverty  Is  No  Crime 67 

Sin  and  Sorrow  Are  Common  to  All     ....  137 

It's  a  Family  Affair — We'll  Settle  It  Ourselves  215 


INTRODUCTION 


INTRQDUCTION 

Alexander  Nikolayevich  Ostrovsky  (1823-86)  is  the 
great  Russian  dramatist  of  the  central  decades  of  the  nine- 
teenth century,  of  the  years  when  the  reahstic  school  was  all- 
powerful  in  Russian  literature,  of  the  period  when  Turgenev, 
^'         Dostoyevsky,  and  Tolstoy  created  a  literature  of  prose  fiction 
^x         that  has  had  no  superior  in  the  world's  history.     His  work 
^         in  the  drama  takes  its  place  beside  theirs  in  the  novel.     Ob- 
N^         viously  inferior  as  it  is  in  certain  ways,  it  yet  sheds  light  on 
an  important  side  of  Russian  life  that  they  left  practically 
v,,^         untouched.     Turgenev  and  Tolstoy  were  gentlemen  by  birth, 
fNJ         and  wrote  of  the  fortunes  of  the  Russian  nobility  or  of  the 
d^         peasants   whose   villages    bordered    on    the   nobles'    estates. 
Dostoyevsky,  though   not  of  this  landed-proprietor  school, 
still  dealt  with  the  nobility,  albeit  with  its  waifs  and  strays. 
None  of  these  masters  more  than  touched  the  Russian  mer- 
|I^        chants,   that  homespun   moneyed   class,   crude  and   coarse, 
grasping  and  mean,  without  the  idealism  of  their  educated 
neighbors  in  the  cities  or  the  homely  charm  of  the  peasants 
from  whom  they  themselves  sprang,  yet  gifted  with  a  rough 
force  and  determination  not  often  found  among  the  culti- 
vated aristocracy.     This  was  the  field  that  Ostrovsky  made 
peculiarly  liis  own. 

With  this  merchant  class  Ostrovsky  was  familiar  from  his 
childhood.  Born  in  1823,  he  was  the  son  of  a  lawyer  doing 
business  among  the  Moscow  tradesmen.  After  finishing  his 
course  at  the  gymnasium  and  spending  three  years  at  the 
University  of  Moscow,  he  entered  the  civil  service  in  1843 
as  an  employee  of  the  Court  of  Conscience  in  Moscow,  from 

3 


4  INTRODUCTION 

which  he  transferred  two  years  later  to  the  Court  of  Com- 
merce, where  he  continued  until  he  was  discharged  from  the 
service  in  1851.  Hence  both  by  his  home  life  and  l)y  his  pro- 
fessional training  he  was  brought  into  contact  with  types 
such  as  Bolshov  and  Rizpolozhensky  in  "It's  a  Family  Affair 
— We'll  Settle  It  Ourselves." 

As  a  boy  of  seventeen  Ostrovsky  had  already  developed  a 
passion  for  the  theatre.  His  literary  career  began  in  the 
year  1847,  when  he  read  to  a  group  of  Moscow  men  of  letters 
his  first  experiments  in  dramatic  composition.  In  this  same 
year  he  printed  one  scene  of  "A  Family  Affair,"  which  ap- 
peared in  complete  form  three  years  later,  in  1850,  and  estab- 
lished its  author's  reputation  as  a  dramatist  of  undoubted 
talent.  Unfortunately,  by  its  mordant  but  true  picture  of 
commercial  morals,  it  aroused  against  him  the  most  bitter 
feelings  among  the  Moscow  merchants.  Discussion  of  the 
play  in  the  press  was  prohibited,  and  representation  of  it  on 
the  stage  was  out  of  the  question.  It  was  reprinted  only  in 
1859,  and  then,  at  the  instance  of  the  censorship,  in  an  al- 
tered form,  in  which  a  police  officer  appears  at  the  end  of  the 
play  as  a  deus  ex  machina,  arrests  Podkhalyuzin,  and  an- 
nounces that  he  will  be  sent  to  Siberia.  In  this  mangled 
version  the  play  was  acted  in  1861;  in  its  original  text  it  did 
not  appear  on  the  stage  until  1881.  Besides  all  this,  the 
drama  was  the  cause  of  the  dismissal  of  Ostrovskj'  from  the 
civil  service,  in  1851.  The  whole  episode  illustrates  the  diffi- 
culties under  which  the  great  writers  of  Russia  have  con- 
stantly labored  under  a  despotic  government. 

Beginning  with  1852  Ostrovsky  gave  his  whole  strength  to 
literary  work.  He  is  exceptional  among  Russian  authors  in 
devoting  himself  almost  exclusively  to  the  theatre.  The  lat- 
est edition  of  his  works  contains  forty-eight  pieces  written 
entirely    by    him,    and    six    produced    in  collaboration  with 


INTRODUCTION  5 

other  authors.  It  omits  his  translations  from  foreign  dram- 
atists, which  were  of  considerable  importance,  including, 
for  example,  a  version  of  Shakespeare's  "Taming  of  the 
Slu-ew." 

The  plays  of  Ostrovsky  are  of  varied  character,  including 
dramatic  chronicles  based  on  early  Russian  history,  and  a 
fairy  drama,  "Little  Snowdrop."  His  real  strength  lay, 
however,  in  the  drama  of  manners,  giving  realistic  pictures 
of  Russian  life  among  the  Russian  city  classes  and  the  minor 
nobility.  Here  he  was  recognized,  from  the  time  of  the  ap- 
pearance on  the  stage  of  his  first  pieces,  in  1853  and  the  fol- 
lowing years,  as  without  a  rival  among  Russian  authors  for 
the  theatre.  Of  this  realistic  drama  the  present  volume  gives 
four  characteristic  examples. 

The  tone  of  "Poverty  Is  No  Crime"  (1854),  written  only 
four  years  after  "A  Family  Affair,"  is  in  sharp  contrast  with 
that  of  its  predecessor.  In  the  earlier  play  Ostrovsky  had 
adopted  a  satiric  tone  that  proved  him  a  worthy  disciple  of 
Gogol,  the  great  founder  of  Russian  realism.  Not  one  lova- 
ble character  appears  in  that  gloomy  picture  of  merchant 
life  in  Moscow ;  even  the  old  mother  repels  us  by  her  stupidity 
more  than  she  attracts  us  by  her  kindliness.  No  ray  of  light 
penetrates  the  "realm  of  darkness" — to  borrow  a  famous 
phrase  from  a  Russian  critic — conjured  up  before  us  by  the 
young  dramatist.  In  "Poverty  Is  No  Crime"  we  see  the 
other  side  of  the  medal.  Ostrovsky  had  now  been  affected 
by  the  Slavophile  school  of  writers  and  thinkers,  who  found 
in  the  traditions  of  Russian  society  treasures  of  kindliness 
and  love  that  they  contrasted  with  the  superficial  glitter  of 
Western  civilization.  Life  in  Russia  is  varied  as  elsewhere, 
and  Ostrovsky  could  change  his  tone  without  doing  violence 
to  realistic  truth.  The  tradesmen  had  not  wholly  lost  the 
patriarchal  charm  of  their  peasant  fathers.     A  poor  appren- 


6  INTRODUCTION 

lice  is  the  hero  of  "Poverty  Is  No  Crime,"  and  a  wealthy 
maiuifacturer  the  vilhiiii  of  the  pieec.  Goocl-hearte(hiess  is 
the  touchstone  by  which  Ostrovsky  tries  cliaracter,  and  this 
may  be  hidden  beneath  even  a  drunken  and  degraded  exte- 
rior. The  scapegrace,  Lyubim  Tortsov,  has  a  sound  Russian 
soul,  and  at  tlie  end  of  the  play  rouses  his  hard,  gras])ing 
brother,  who  has  been  infatuated  by  a  passion  for  aping 
foreign  fasliions,  to  his  native  Russian  worth. 

Just  as  "Poverty  Is  No  Crime"  shows  the  influence  of  the 
Slavophile  movement,  "A  Protegee  of  the  Mistress"  (1859) 
was  inspired  by  the  great  liberal  movement  that  bore  fruit 
in  the  emancipation  of  the  serfs  in  1861.  Ostrovsky  here 
departed  from  town  to  a  typical  coimtry  manor,  and  pro- 
duced a  work  kindred  in  spirit  to  Turgenev's  "Sportsman's 
Sketches,"  or  "Mumu."  In  a  short  play,  instinct  with  sim- 
ple poetry,  he  shows  the  suffering  brought  about  by  serf- 
dom: the  petty  tyranny  of  the  landed  proprietor,  which  is 
the  more  galling  because  it  is  practised  with  a  full  conviction 
of  virtue  on  the  part  of  the  tyant;  and  the  crushed  natures 
of  the  human  cattle  under  his  charge. 

The  master  grim,  the  lowly  serf  that  tills  his  lands; 
With  lordly  pride  the  first  sends  forth  commands. 
The  second  cringes  like  a  slave. 

— Nekrasov. 

Despite  the  unvarying  success  of  his  dramas  on  the  stage, 
Ostrovsky  for  a  long  time  derived  little  financial  benefit 
from  them.  Discouragement  and  overwork  wrecked  his 
health,  and  were  undoubtedly  responsible  for  the  gloomy 
tone  of  a  series  of  plays  written  in  the  years  following  1860, 
of  which  "Sin  and  Sorrow  Are  Common  to  All"  (1863)  is  a 
typical  example.  Here  the  dramatist  sketches  a  tragic  inci- 
dent arising  from  the  conflict  of  two  social  classes,  the  petty 


INTRODUCTION  7 

tradesmen  and  the  nobility.  From  the  coarse  environment 
of  the  first  emerge  honest,  upright  natures  Hke  Krasnov; 
from  the  superficial,  dawdling  culture  of  the  second  come 
weak-willed  triflers  like  Babtiyev.  The  sordid  plot  sweeps 
on  to  its  inevitable  conclusion  with  true  tragic  force. 

Towards  the  end  of  his  life  Ostrovsky  gained  the  material 
prosperity  that  was  liis  due.  "There  was  no  theatre  in 
Russia  in  which  his  plays  were  not  acted"  (Skabichevsky). 
From  1874  to  his  death  he  was  the  president  of  the  Society 
of  Russian  Dramatic  Authors.  In  1885  he  received  the  im- 
portant post  of  artistic  director  of  the  Moscow  government 
theatres;  the  harassing  duties  of  the  position  proved  too 
severe  for  his  weak  constitution,  and  he  passed  away  in  the 
next  year. 

As  a  dramatist,  Ostrovsky  is  above  all  else  a  realist;  no 
more  thoroughly  natural  dramas  than  his  were  ever  com- 
posed. Yet  as  a  master  of  realistic  technique  he  must  not 
be  compared  with  Ibsen,  or  evt  with  many  less  noted  men 
among  modern  dramatists.  His  plays  have  not  the  neat, 
concise  construction  that  we  prize  to-day.  Pages  of  dialogue 
sometimes  serve  no  purpose  except  to  make  a  trifle  clearer 
the  character  of  the  actors,  or  perhaps  slightly  to  heighten 
the  impression  of  commonplace  reality.  Even  in  "Sin  and 
Sorrow"  and  "A  Protegee"  whole  passages  merely  illustrate 
the  background  against  wliich  the  plot  is  set  rather  than 
help  forward  the  action  itself.  Many  plays,  such  as  "A 
Family  Affair,"  end  with  relatively  unimportant  pieces  of 
dialogue.  Of  others  we  are  left  to  guess  even  the  conclusion 
of  the  main  action:  will  Nadya  in  "A  Protegee"  submit  to 
her  degrading  fate,  or  will  she  seek  refuge  in  the  pond? 

Ostrovsky  rarely  uses  the  drama  to  treat  of  great  moral 
or  social  problems.     He  is  not  a  revolutionary  thinker  or  an 


8  INTRODUCTION 

opponent  of  existing  society;  liis  ideal,  like  that  of  his  pred- 
ecessor Gogol,  is  of  honesty,  kindliness,  generosity,  and 
loyalty  in  a  broad,  general  way  to  the  traditions  of  the  past. 
He  attacks  serfdom  not  as  an  isolated  leader  of  a  forlorn 
hope,  but  as  an  adherent  of  a  great  party  of  moderate  re- 
formers. 

Thus  Ostrovsky's  strength  lies  in  a  sedate,  rather  common- 
place realism.  One  of  the  most  national  of  authors,  he  loses 
much  in  translation.'  His  style  is  racy,  smacking  of  the 
street  or  the  counting-liouse;  he  is  one  of  the  greatest  mas- 
ters of  the  Russian  vernacular.  To  translate  his  Moscow 
slang  into  the  equivalent  dialect  of  New  York  would  be 
merely  to  transfer  Broadway  associations  to  the  Ilyinka.  A 
translator  can  only  strive  to  be  colloquial  and  familiar,  giving 
up  the  effort  to  render  the  var^nng  atmosphere  of  the  different 
plays.  And  Ostrovsky's  characters  are  as  natural  as  his 
language.  Pig-headed  merchants;  apprentices,  knavish  or 
honest  as  the  case  may  be;  young  girls  with  a  touch  of  poetry 
in  their  natures,  who  sober  down  into  kindly  housewives; 
tyrannical  serf-owners  and  weak-willed  sons  of  noble  families: 
such  is  the  material  of  which  he  builds  his  entertaining, 
wholesome,  mildly  thoughtful  dramas.  Men  and  women 
live  and  love,  trade  and  cheat  in  Ostrovsky  as  they  do  in 
the  world  around  us.  Now  and  then  a  murder  or  a  suicide 
appears  in  his  pages  as  it  does  in  those  of  the  daily  papers, 
but  hardly  more  frequently.  In  him  we  can  study  the  life 
of  Russia  as  he  knew  it,  crude  and  coarse  and  at  times  cruel, 
yet  full  of  homely  virtue  and  aspiration.  Of  liis  complex 
panorama  the  present  volume  gives  a  brief  glimpse. 

■Ostr6vsky  it  inay  Ix-  remarked,  has  been  singularly  neglected  by  translators 
from  the  Russian.  The  only  previous  versions  of  complete  plays  in  P^ngUsh  known 
to  the  present  writer  are  "The  Storm."  by  Constance  Garnett  (Loudon  and  Chi- 
cago, 1899,  and  since  reprinted),  and  "Incompatibility  of  Temper"  and  "A  Domestic 
Picture"  (in  "The  Humour  of  Russia."  oy  E.  L.  Voynich,  London  and  New  York, 
1895). 


A  PROTEGEE   OF   THE 
MISTRESS 

SCENES    FROM    VILLAGE    LIFE    IX 
FOUR     PICTURES 


CHARACTERS 

Madam  I^lanbkkov,^  an  old  iroman  of  nearly  sixty,  tall,  thin, 
with  a  large  nose,  and  thick,  black  eyebrows;  of  an  Eastern 
type  of  face,  with  a  small  mustache.  She  is  poicdcred  and 
rouged,  and  dressed  richly  in  black.  She  is  otvner  of  two 
thousand  serfs. 

LEONio,  her  son,  eighteen  years  old,  very  handsome,  resembling 
his  mother  slightly.  Wears  summer  dress.  Is  studying  in 
Petersburg. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna,  a  toady  of  Madam  Ulanbekov's, 
an  old  maid  of  forty.  Scanty  hair,  parted  slantingly,  combed 
high,  and  held  by  a  large  comb.  She  w  continually  smiling 
with  a  wily  expression,  and  she  suffers  from  toothacJie;  about 
her  throat  is  a  yellow  shawl  fastened  by  a  brooch. 

PoTAPYCH,  the  old  steward.  Tie  and  vest,  ivhite;  coat  black. 
Has  an  air  of  importance. 

Nadezhda  2  (called  Nadya),  seventeen  years  old,  favorite  protS- 
gSe  of  IVIadam  Ulanbekov;   dressed  like  a  young  lady. 

Gaatrilovna,  the  housekeeper;  an  elderly  woman,  plump,  with 
an  open  countenance. 

Grisha,  a  boy  of  nineteen,  a  favorite  of  the  mistress,  dandified 
in  dress,  wearing  a  watch  with  a  gold  chain.  He  is  handsome, 
curly-headed,  ivith  a  foolish  expression. 

Negligentov,  a  clerk  in  a  government  office;  a  very  disrepu- 
table young  man. 

Liza,  a  housemaid,  not  bad-looking,  but  very  stout  and  snub- 
nosed;  in  a  white  dress,  of  tvhich  the  bodice  is  short  and  ill- 
ff,tting.  About  her  neck  is  a  little  red  kerchief;  her  hair  is 
very  much  pomaded. 

A  peasant  girl,  a  footman,  and  a  housemaid :  mute  personages. 

The  action  takes  place  in  the  springtime,  at  the  suburban  estate 
of  Madam  Ulanbekov 

'  The  name  hints  at  a  Circassian  origin  and  a  tyrannical  disposition.    Ostr6v9ky 
frequently  gives  to  the  persons  in  his  plays  names  that  suggest  their  characteristics. 
''  Hope. 


A   PROTEGEE   OF  THE 
MISTRESS 


Part  of  a  densely  grown  garden;   ott  the  right  benches;   at  the 
back  a  rail  fence,  separating  the  garden  from  a  field 

SCENE    I 

Enter  Nadya  and  Liza 

Nadya.  No,  Liza,  don't  say  that:  what  comparison  could 
there  be  between  country  and  city  hfe ! 

Liza.  What  is  there  so  specially  fine  about  city  life? 

Nadya.  Well,  everything  is  different  there;  the  people 
themselves,  and  even  the  whole  social  order  are  entirely 
different.  [She  sits  down  on  a  bench]  When  I  was  in  Peters- 
burg with  the  mistress,  one  had  only  to  take  a  look  at  the 
sort  of  people  who  came  to  see  us,  and  at  the  way  our  rooms 
were  decorated;  besides,  the  mistress  took  me  with  her 
everywhere;  we  even  went  on  the  steamer  to  Peter hof,  and 
to  Tsarskoe  Selo. 

Liza.  That  was  pretty  fine,  I  suppose. 

Nadya.  Yes  indeed,  it  was  so  splendid  that  words  can't 
describe  it !  Because,  no  matter  how  much  I  may  tell  you 
about  it,  if  you  haven't  seen  it  yourself,  you'll  never  under- 
stand. And  when  a  young  lady,  the  mistress's  niece,  was 
visiting  us,  I  used  to  chat  with  her  the  whole  evening,  and 
sometimes  we  even  sat  through  the  night. 

Liza.  What  in  the  world  did  you  talk  about  with  her? 
11 


U  A   PROTfiGfiE  ACTi 

Nadya.  Well,  naturally,  for  the  most  part  about  the  ways 
of  hip;li  society,  about  her  dancing  partners,  and  about  the 
officers  of  the  guard.  And  as  she  was  often  at  l)alls,  she  told 
me  what  they  talked  about  there,  and  whom  she  had  liked 
best.     Only  how  fine  those  young  ladies  are ! 

Liza.  What  do  you  mean  ? 

Nadya.  They're  very  gay.  And  where  dicl  they  learn  all 
that?  Afterwards  we  lived  a  whole  winter  in  Moscow. 
Seeing  all  this,  my  dear,  you  try  to  act  like  a  born  lady 
yourself.  Your  very  manners  change,  and  you  try  to  have 
a  way  of  talking  of  your  own. 

Liza.  But  why  should  we  try  to  be  fine  ladies.''  Much 
good  it  does  ! 

Nadya.  Much  good,  you  say  ?  Well,  you  see  the  ladies 
promised  to  marry  me  off,  so  I  am  trying  to  educate  myself, 
so  that  no  one' 11  be  ashamed  to  take  me.  You  know  what 
sort  of  wives  our  officials  have;  well,  what  a  lot  they  are! 
And  I  understand  life  and  society  ten  tirties  better  than  they 
do.  Now  I  have  just  one  hope:  to  marry  a  good  man,  so 
I  may  be  the  mistress  of  my  ox'n  household.  You  just  watch 
then  how  I'll  manage  the  hov.  e;  it  will  be  no  worse  at  my 
house  than  at  any  fine  lady's. 

Liza.  God  grant  your  wish !  But  do  you  notice  how  the 
young  master  is  running  after  you  ? 

Nadya.  Much  good  it'll  do  him  !  Of  course,  he's  a  pretty 
fellow,  you  might  even  say,  a  beauty;  only  he  has  nothing 
to  expect  from  me;  because  I  am  decidedly  not  of  that  sort; 
and  on  the  other  hand,  I'm  trying  now  in  every  way  that 
there  may  be  no  scandal  of  any  sort  about  me.  I  have  but 
one  thing  in  mind:  to  get  married. 

Liza.  Even  married  life  is  sometimes  no  joy !  You  may 
get  such  a  husband  that ....      God  help  you  ! 

Nadya.  What  a  joy  it  would  be  to  me  to  marry  a  really 


SCENE  II 


A  PROTEGEE  13 


fine  man !  I,  thank  Gofl,  am  able  to  distinguish  between 
people:  who  is  good,  who  bad.  That's  easy  to  see  at  once 
from  their  manners  and  conversation.  But  the  mistress  is 
so  unreasonable  in  holding  us  in  so  strictly,  and  in  keeping 
everlasting  watch  over  us !  Indeed,  it's  insulting  to  me ! 
I'm  a  girl  that  knows  how  to  take  care  of  herself  without  any 
watching. 

Liza.  It  looks  as  if  the  master  were  coming. 

Nadya.  Then  let's  go.  [They  rise  and  go  out. 

Leonid  comes  in  with  a  gun, 

SCENE    II 

Leonid  and  then  Potapych 

Leonid.  Wait  a  bit !  Hey,  you,  where  are  you  going .'' 
Why  are  they  always  running  away  from  me?  You  can't 
catch  them  anyhow  !  [He  stands  musing.     Silence. 

A  Girl  sings  behind  the  rail  fence  : 

"No  man  may  hope  to  flee  the  sting 
Of  cruel  affliction's  pain; 
New  love  within  the  heart  may  sing — 
Regret  still  in  its  train." 

Leonid.  [Running  up  to  the  fence]  What  a  pretty  girl  you 
are! 

Girl.  Pretty,  but  not  yours ! 

Leonid.  Come  here ! 

Girl.  Where  .-^ 

Leonid.  To  me  in  the  garden. 

Girl.  Why  go  to  you  ? 

Leonid.  I'll  go  to  town  and  buy  you  earrings. 

Girl.  You're  only  a  kid  ! 

She  laughs  loudly  and  goes  out.     Leonid  stands  with 


14  A  PROTEGEE  act  i 

hoived  head  musing.  Potapycii  enters  in  hunting- 
dress,  ivilh  a  gun. 

Potapycii.  One  can't  keep  up  with  you,  sir;  you  have 
young  legs. 

Leonid.  [All  the  lehile  lost  in  thought]  All  this,  Potapych, 
will  be  mine. 

Potapycii.  All  yours,  sir,  and  we  shall  all  be  yours.  .  .  . 
Just  as  we  served  the  old  master,  so  we  must  serve  you .... 
Because  you're  of  the  same  blood.  .  .  .  That's  the  right 
way.  Of  course,  may  God  prolong  your  dear  mamma's 
days.  .  .  . 

Leonid.  Then  I  shan't  enter  the  service,  Potapych;  I 
shall  come  directly  to  the  country,  and  here  I  shall  live. 

Potapych.  You  must  enter  the  service,  sir. 

Leonid.  What's  that  you  say  ?  Much  I  must !  They'll 
make  me  a  copying  clerk !         [He  sits  down  upon  a  bench. 

Potapych.  No,  sir,  why  should  you  work  yourself.^ 
That's  not  the  way  to  do  things !  They'll  find  a  position 
for  you — of  the  most  gentlemanly,  delicate  sort;  your  clerks 
will  work,  but  you'll  be  their  chief,  over  all  of  them.  And 
promotions  will  come  to  you  of  themselves. 

Leonid.  Perhaps  they  will  make  me  vice-governor,  or  elect 
me  marshal  of  the  nobility. 

Potapych.  It's  not  improbable. 

Leonid.  Well,  and  when  I'm  vice-governor,  shall  you  be 
afraid  of  me? 

Potapych.  Why  should  I  be  afraid  ?  Let  others  cringe, 
but  for  us  it's  all  the  same.  You  are  our  master:  that's 
honor  enough  for  us. 

Leonid.  [Not  hearing]  Tell  me,  Potapych,  have  we  many 
pretty  girls  here.'' 

Potapycii.  Why,  really,  sir,  if  you  think  it  over,  why 
shouldn't  there  be  girls?     There  are  some  on  the  estate. 


SCENE  U 


A   PROTfiGEE  15 


and  among  tlie  house  servants;  only  it  must  be  said  that  in 
these  matters  the  household  is  very  strictly  run.  Our  mis- 
tress, owing  to  her  strict  life  and  her  piety,  looks  after  that 
very  carefully.  Now  just  take  this:  she  herself  marries  off 
the  protegees  and  housemaids  whom  she  likes.  If  a  man 
pleases  her,  she  marries  the  girl  off  to  him,  and  even  gives 
her  a  dowry,  not  a  big  one — needless  to  say.  There  are 
always  two  or  three  protegees  on  the  place.  The  mistress 
takes  a  little  girl  from  some  one  or  other  and  brings  her  up; 
and  when  she  is  seventeen  or  eighteen  years  old,  then,  with- 
out any  talk,  she  marries  her  off  to  some  clerk  or  towns- 
man, just  as  she  takes  a  notion,  and  sometimes  even  to  a 
nobleman.  Ah,  yes,  sir !  Only  what  an  existence  for  these 
protegees,  sir  !     Misery  ! 

Leonid.  But  whj'.^ 

PoTAPYCH.  They  have  a  hard  time.  The  lady  says:  "I 
have  found  you  a  prospective  husband,  and  now,"  she  says, 
"the  wedding  will  be  on  such  and  such  a  day,  and  that's  an 
end  to  it;  and  don't  one  of  you  dare  to  argue  about  it !"  It's 
a  case  of  get  along  with  you  to  the  man  you're  told  to.  Be- 
cause, sir,  I  reason  this  way:  who  wants  to  see  disobedience 
in  a  person  he's  brought  up  ?  And  sometimes  it  happens 
that  the  bride  doesn't  like  the  groom,  nor  the  groom  the 
bride:  then  the  lady  falls  into  a  great  rage.  She  even  goes 
out  of  her  head.  She  took  a  notion  to  marry  one  protegee 
to  a  petty  shopkeeper  in  town;  but  he,  an  unpolished  indi- 
vidual, was  going  to  resist.  "The  bride  doesn't  please  me," 
he  said,  "and,  besides,  I  don't  want  to  get  married  yet." 
So  the  mistress  complained  at  once  to  the  town  bailiff  and 
to  the  priest:  well,  they  brought  the  blockhead  round. 

Leonid.  You  don't  say. 

PoTAPYCH.  Yes,  sir.  And  even  if  the  mistress  sees  a  girl 
at  one  of  her  acquaintances',  she  immediately  looks  up  a  hus- 


16  A   PROTF.GfiE  ACT  I 

hand  for  her.  Our  mistress  reasons  this  way:  llial  they  are 
sliii)i(l;  tliat  if  she  doesn't  look  after  them  elosely  now, 
they'll  just  waste  their  life  and  never  amount  to  anything. 
That's  the  way,  sir.  Some  people,  because  of  their  stupidity, 
hide  girls  from  the  mistress,  so  that  she  may  never  set  eyes 
on  them;    because  if  she  does,  it's  all  up  with  the  girls. 

Leonid.  And  so  she  treats  other  people's  girls  the  same 
way  ? 

PoTAPYCH.  Other  people's,  too.  She  extends  her  care  to 
everybody.  She  has  such  a  kind  heart  that  she  worries 
about  everybody.  She  even  gets  angry  if  they  do  anything 
without  her  permission.  And  the  way  she  looks  after  her 
protegees  is  just  a  wonder.  She  dresses  them  as  if  they  were 
her  own  daughters.  Sometimes  she  has  them  eat  with  her; 
and  she  doesn't  make  them  do  any  work.  "Let  everybody 
look,"  says  the  mistress,  "and  see  how  my  protegees  live; 
I  want  every  one  to  envy  them,"  she  says. 

Leonid.  Well,  now,  that's  fine,  Potapych. 

PoTAPYCH.  And  what  a  touching  little  sermon  she  reads 
ihem  when  they're  married  !  "You,"  she  says,  "have  lived 
with  me  in  wealth  and  luxury,  and  have  had  nothing  to  do; 
now  you  are  marrying  a  poor  man,  and  will  live  your  life  in 
poverty,  and  will  work,  and  will  do  your  duty.  And  now 
forget,"  she  says,  "how  you  lived  here,  because  not  for  you 
I  did  all  this;  I  was  merely  diAcrting  myself,  but  you  must 
never  even  think  of  such  a  life;  always  remember  your  in- 
significance, and  of  what  station  you  are."  And  all  this  so 
feelingly  that  tlicre  are  tears  in  her  own  eyes. 

Leonid.  Well,  now,  tiiat's  fine. 

Potapych.  I  don't  know  how  to  describe  it,  sir.  Some- 
how they  all  get  tired  of  married  life  later;  they  mostly  pine 
away. 

Leonid.  Why  do  they  pine  away,  Potapych.'' 


SCENE  II 


A   PROTfiGfiE  17 


PoTAPYCH.  Must  be  they  don't  like  it,  if  they  pine  away. 

Leonid.  That's  queer. 

PoTAPYCH.  The  husbands  mostly  turn  out  ruffians. 

Leonid.  Is  that  so.^ 

PoTAPYCH.  Everybody  hopes  to  get  one  of  our  protegees, 
because  the  mistress  right  away  becomes  his  patroness.  Now 
in  the  case  of  these  she  marries  to  government  clerks,  there's 
a  good  living  for  the  husband;  because  if  they  want  to  drive 
him  out  of  the  court,  or  have  done  so,  he  goes  at  once  to  our 
mistress  with  a  complaint,  and  she's  a  regular  bulwark  for 
him;  she'll  bother  the  governor  liimself.  And  then  the  gov- 
ernment clerk  can  get  drunk  or  anything  else,  and  not  be 
afraid  of  anybody,  unless  he  is  insubordinate  or  steals  a 
lot 

Leonid.  But,  say,  Potapych,  why  is  it  that  the  girls  run 
away  from  me.'' 

Potapych.  How    can    they    help    running  ?     They    must 


run,  sir 


Leonid.  Why  must  they  ? 

Potapych.  Hm !  Why  ?  Why,  because,  as  you  are  still 
under  age,  the  mistress  wants  to  watch  over  you  as  she 
ought  to;  well,  and  she  watches  over  them,  too. 

Leonid.  She  watches  us,  ha,  ha,  ha ! 

Potapych.  Yes,  sir.  That's  the  truth !  She  was  talking 
about  that.  You're  a  child,  just  like  a  dove,  but,  well — 
the  girls  are  foolish.  [Silence]  What  next,  sir?  It's  your 
mamma's  business  to  be  strict,  because  she  is  a  lady.  But 
why  should  you  mind  her !  You  ought  to  act  for  yourself, 
as  all  yoimg  gentlemen  do.  You  don't  have  to  suffer  because 
she's  strict.  Why  should  jou  let  others  get  ahead  of  you.'' 
That'd  disgrace  you. 

Leonid.  Well,  well,  but  I  don't  know  how  to  talk  to  the 
girls. 


18  A  PROTfiGfiE  ACT  I 

PoTAPYCH.  But  what's  the  use  of  talking  to  them  a  long 
time?  What  al)()ut?  Wluit  kind  of  sciences  would  you 
talk  about  witli  them?  Much  thej^  understand  such  stuflf! 
You're  just  the  master,  and  that's  all. 

Leonid.  [Glances  to  one  side]  Who's  this  coming?  That's 
Nadya,  evidently.     Ah,  Potapych,  how  pretty  she  is ! 

PoTAPYCH.  She  is  related  to  me,  sir,  my  niece.  Her 
father  was  set  free  by  the  late  master;  he  was  employed  in 
a  confectioner's  in  Moscow.  When  her  mother  died,  her 
mistress  took  and  brought  her  up,  and  is  awful  fond  of  her. 
And  because  her  father  is  dead,  why,  now,  she's  an  orphan. 
She's  a  good  girl. 

Leonid.  Looks  as  if  they  were  coming  this  way. 

PoTAPYCH.  Well,  let  'em. 

Gavrilovna  and  Nadya  enter. 


SCENE    III 

The  same,  Gavrilovna  and  Nadya 

Gavrilovna.  How  do  you  do,  good  master? 

Leonid.  [Bows]  How  do  you  do? 

Gavrilovna.  Well,  master,  I  suppose  you're  bored  in  the 
country  ? 

Leonid.  No,  not  at  all. 

Gavrilovna.  What,  not  bored  yet !  Why,  you  see  it's 
like  a  monastery  here;  they  look  after  you  with  a  hundred 
eyes.  Well,  as  for  you,  it  goes  without  saying,  you're  a 
young  gentleman,  you  ought  to  have  some  amusement; 
but  you  can't.     It's  no  great  joy  to  shoot  ducks ! 

[She  laughs. 

Leonid.  [Going  up  to  Gavrilovna]  Yes,  yes,  Gavrilovna. 

Nadya.  [To  Gavrilovna]  Let's  go. 


SCENE  IV  A   PROTEGEE  19 

Gavrilovna.  Where  do  you  want  to  go?  Now,  seeing 
that  the  mistress  isn't  at  home,  you  ought  to  have  a  little 
fun  with  the  young  master.  That's  what  young  folks  need. 
And  what  a  clever  girl  she  is,  master !  In  talking,  and  in 
everything. 

Nadya.  Gome,  what's  the  use ! 

Gavrilovna.  Well,  there's  no  harm  in  it !  I  was  young 
once.  I  didn't  run  away  from  the  gentlemen,  and  you  see 
they  didn't  eat  me.  Perhaps  even  he  won't  bite  you.  Quit 
playing  the  prude,  and  stay  here!  But  I'm  going  to  get  the 
tea  ready  !     Good-by,  good  master  !  [She  goes  out. 

Leonid.  Why  did  you  not  wish  to  remain  with  me.'' 

PoTAPYCH.  Wliat's  this,  sir !  You  talk  to  her  as  if  she 
were  a  young  lady  !     Call  her  Nadya ! 

Leonid.  What  are  you  afraid  of,  Nadya.'' 
Nadya  is  silent. 

PoTAPYCH.  Talk  !  What  are  you  keeping  still  for .''  And 
I'm  going,  sir;  I  must  get  dressed  for  tea,  too..    [He  goes  out. 


SCENE    IV 

Leonid,  Nadya,  and  then  Liza 

Nadya.  Of  course  I'm  a  girl  of  humble  position,  but, 
indeed,  even  we  do  not  want  anybody  to  speak  evil  of  us. 
Pray  consider  yourself,  after  such  talk,  who  would  marry 
me.'' 

Leonid.  Are  you  going  to  get  married  ? 

Nadya.  Yes,  sir.  Every  girl  hopes  to  get  maiTied  some 
time. 

Leonid.  But  have  you  a  suitor.'' 

Nadya.  Not  yet,  sir. 


20  A  PROTEGEE  act  i 

Leonid.  [Timidly]  If  you  have  no  suitor,  tlien,  niayhe 
you're  in  love  with  somebody? 

Nadya.  You  want  to  know  a  lot!  Well,  no,  I  needn't  fib 
about  it,  I'm  not  in  love  with  anybody,  sir. 

Leonid.  [With  great  joy]  Then  love  me! 

Nadya.  It's  impossible  to  force  the  heart,  sir. 

Leonid.  Why  ?     Don't  you  like  me  ? 

Nadya.  Well,  how  could  I  help  liking  you  ?     But  I'm  not 

your  equal !     What  sort  of  love  is  that  .'*     Clean  ruin  !     Here 

comes  Liza  running  after  me,  I  suppose.     Good-by.     Gootl 

luck  to  you  !  [She  goes  away. 

Liza  comes  in. 

Liza.  Master,  if  you  please !     Your  mamma  has  come. 

Leonid.  Liza ! 

Liza.  [Approaching]  What  is  it,  please.^ 

Leonid.  [He  embraces  Liza;  she  trembles  icith  pleasure]  ^Vlly 
won't  Nadya  love  me.^ 

Liza.  [Affectedly]  What  are  you  talking  about,  master ! 
Girls  of  our  sort  must  look  out  for  themselves ! 

Leonid.  Look  out  for  yourselves  how .'' 

Liza.  [Looks  him  in  the  face  and  smiles]  Why,  everybody 
knows.     What  are  you  talking  like  a  child  for? 

Leonid.  [Sadly]  What  shall  I  do  now?  Indeed,  I  don't 
know.     They  all  run  away  from  me. 

Liza.  But  don't  lose  courage;  just  make  love  a  little  bit. 
Heavens,  our  hearts  aren't  of  stone ! 

Leonid.  But  see  here!  I  asked  her:  she  said  she  didn't 
love  me. 

Liza.  Well,  if  you  aren't  a  queer  one !  Whoever  asked 
girls  right  out  whether  they  were  in  love  or  not !  Even  if 
one  of  us  girls  was  in  love,  she  wouldn't  say  so. 

Leonid.  Why? 


SCENE  V 


A   PROTfiGfiE  21 


Liza.  Because  she's  bashful.  Ouly  let  me  go,  sir !  [She 
gets  free]  There  goes  the  old  fury  ! 

Leonid.  Come  out  here  into  the  garden  after  supper, 
when  mamma  goes  to  bed. 

Liza.  You  don't  lose  any  time ! 

Leonid.  Please  come. 

Liza.  Well,  we'll  see  later.  [Vasilisa  Peregrinovna  enters] 
Master,  please  come  to  tea^  your  mamma  is  waiting. 

Leonid.  All  right,  I'm  coming. 


SCENE    V 

The  same  and  Vasilisa  Peregrinovna 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  I  saw  you,  my  dear,  I  saw  you. 

Liza.  There  was  nothing  to  see.  [She  goes  out. 

Leonid.  Well,  what  did  you  see  ?  What  are  you  going  to 
complain  about  .^  I  shall  simply  say  that  you  lie.  Whom 
are  they  going  to  believe  quicker,  you  or  me? 

[He  makes  a  grimace  and  goes  out. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  There,  that's  the  way  they  all 
treat  me.  I  can't  stand  it !  My  heart  is  just  sick.  I'm  a 
martyr  in  this  world.  [She  plucks  a  flower  viciously  and  pulls 
off  its  petals]  I  believe  that  if  I  had  the  power  I'd  do  this  to 
all  of  you !  I'd  do  this  to  all  of  you !  I'd  do  this  to  all  of 
you !  You  just  wait,  you  young  scamp !  I'll  catch  you. 
My  heart  boils,  it  boils,  it  boils  over !  And  now  I  must 
smirk  before  the  mistress  as  if  I  were  a  fool.  What  a  life ! 
What  a  life  !  The  sinners  in  hell  do  not  suffer  as  I  suffer  in 
this  house !  [She  goes  out. 


II 

A  parlor.  R''ar  centre,  a  door  opening  into  the  garden.  Doors 
at  the  sides;  in  tJw  centre  a  round  table. 

SCENE    I 

From  a  side  door  there  enter  a  footman  with  a  samovar  and  a 
maid  icith  a  tea-service ;  they  place  both  on  the  table  and 
go  out.  Gavrilovna  and  Potapych  enter  after  them. 
Gavrilovna  prepares  the  tea.  Vasilisa  Peregrinovna 
enters  from  the  garden. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  My  dear,  you  always  serve  me 
only  water. 

Gavrilovna.  It  isn't  good  for  you  to  drink  strong  tea, 
madam. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  It's  not  your  business  to  worry 
about  me ! 

Gavrilovna.  It  dries  up  the  chest,  and  you're  all  dried 
up  as  it  is. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  What  a  life !  What  a  life !  I 
am  not  dried  up  from  tea-drinking,  my  dear,  but  from  the 
insults  of  the  world. 

Gavrilovna.  Insults !  You  insult  everybody  yourself,  as 
if  something  were  stirring  you  up ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Don't  you  dare  talk  to  me  like 
that !  Just  remember  who  you  are.  I  once  owned  serfs 
myself;  at  my  place,  such  people  as  you  didn't  dare  peep, 
they  walked  the  chalk.  I  didn't  let  your  sort  get  high- 
headed  ! 

22 


SCENE  II 


A   PROTfiGEE  23 


Gavrilovna.  That  time's  gone  by.  God  gives  a  vicious 
cow  no  horns. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Oh,  you  monsters,  wretches ! 
You  want  me  to  die.  Soon  I  shall  die,  soon;  my  soul  feels 
its  fast  approaching  end !  [Raising  her  eyes  heavemvard] 
Shelter  me  from  men,  O  lid  of  my  coffin  !  Take  me  to  thee, 
moist  earth  !     Then  you'll  be  happy;   then  you'll  be  joyful ! 

Potapych.  We  .^  What's  it  to  us .'....  Tend  to  your 
own  business. 

GAVRiLO\TSfA.  While  God  is  patient  with  your  sins. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  For  my  sins  I  have  already  been 
tortured  here.     I  mourn  now  the  sins  of  others. 

Gavrilovna.  It  would  be  better  for  you  not  to  bother 
with  other  people's  sins.  Now  you're  getting  ready  to  die, 
yet  you  talk  about  the  sins  of  others.     Aren't  you  afraid  ? 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Afraid  of  what  ?  Why  should  I 
be  afraid .'' 

Gavrilovna.  Of  that  little  black  man  with  the  hook. 
He's  waiting  for  you  now,  I  guess. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Where  am  I?  Where  am  I.'' 
My  God  !     Just  as  if  I  were  in  a  slough ;    monsters .... 

From  the  left  side  Madam  Ulanbekov,  Nadya,  Liza, 
and  Grisha  corne  in. 


SCENE    II 

The  same  and  Madam  Ulanbekov,   Grisha,  Nadya,  and 
Liza. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Did  our  benefactress  deign  to 
attend  prayer  service.'' 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Yes,  I  went  to  vespers  in  town; 
to-day  is  a  holiday  there. 


24  A   PROTEgEE  act  II 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Did  you  distribute  generous  alms 
among  tlie  people  present  ? 

Mauam  Ulanbekov.  No,  I  only  called  in  Pustaya  Street  at 
old  man  Negligentov's.  He  asked  me  to  set  up  his  nephew; 
you  see,  the  nephew  is  my  godson.  I'm  sorry  for  these 
people ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  And  you,  dear  soul,  are  a  bene- 
factress to  all.  To  all  alike,  to  all !  You  do  favors  to  people 
who  aren't  even  worth  your  looking  at. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  [Sits  down]  Never  mind,  my  dear. 
One  must  do  good  to  his  neighbor. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  But  do  they  feel  that  good .' 
Can  they  understand,  heartless  creatures,  how  great  is  your 
condescension  to  them.'' 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  It's  all  the  same  to  me,  my  dear ! 
One  must  do  good  for  his  own  sake,  for  his  own  soul.  Then 
I  stopped  in  to  see  the  chief  of  police,  and  asked  him  to 
make  Negligentov  head-clerk. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  But,  my  benefactress,  is  he 
worthy  ? 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Don't  interrupt !  A  strange  man, 
our  chief  of  police!  I  ask  him,  and  he  says:  "There's  no 
job!"  I  say  to  him:  "You  evitlently  don't  understand 
who's  asking  you?"  "Well!"  says  he,  "do  you  expect  me 
to  drive  out  a  good  man  for  your  godson  ?  "  Churlish  fellow  ! 
However,  he  promised ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  To  think  of  his  hesitating !  I 
cannot  understand  how  he  could  even  talk  back  to  you. 
Here  his  ill-breeding  shows  up  at  once.  Maybe  Negligentov, 
because  of  his  life,  isn't  worth  saying  much  about;  never- 
theless, the  chief  ought  to  do  everything  in  the  world  for 
him  for  your  sake,  no  matter  how  worthless  a  scamp  Negli- 
gentov might  be. 


A   PROTEGEE  25 


Madam  Ulanbekov.  Don't  you  forget  that  he's  my  god- 


son 


Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  And  for  that  very  reason, 
benefactress,  I  add:  he  is  your  godson;  well,  and  that's  all 
there  is  to  it;  the  chief  of  police  ought  not  to  listen  to  any 
kind  of  gossip.  And,  besides,  what  things  they  do  say ! 
They  say  that  he's  utterly  worthless,  that  his  uncle  got  him 
a  court  job,  but  he  won't  stay  with  it.  He  was  gone  a  whole 
week,  they  say,  somewhere  or  other  about  three  miles  down 
the  highroad,  near  the  tavern,  fishing.  Yes,  and  that  he  is 
a  drunkard  beyond  his  years.  But  whose  business  is  it? 
He  must  be  worthy  of  it,  since  you  ask  it. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  I've  never  heard  that.  I've  never 
seen  him  drunk;  but  I  spoke  to  the  chief  of  police  on  his 
behalf,  because  he's  my  godson.     I  take  his  mother's  place. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  I  know,  benefactress,  I  know; 
every  one  knows  that  if  you  take  a  notion,  you,  my  bene- 
factress, can  make  a  man  out  of  mud;  but  if  you  don't  take 
a  notion  to  do  so,  he'll  fall  into  insignificance  no  matter  how 
brainy  he  may  be.  He's  to  blame  himself,  because  he  didn't 
deserve  it ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  I'm  sure  I  never  did  any  one  any 
harm. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Harm.''  You,  who  because  of 
your  angelic  heart  wouldn't  hurt  even  a  fly !  Of  course  all 
we  mortals  are  not  without  sins;  you  have  done  many  things; 
you  can't  please  everybody.  Indeed,  to  tell  the  truth,  my  dear 
benefactress,  there  are  people  enough  who  complain  about  you. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Who  complains  about  me  ?  What  a 
lie! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  It's  impossible  for  you  to  know 
everything,  dear  benefactress.  And  it's  not  worth  while  for 
you,  in  your  gentility,  to  trouble  yourself  about  every  low- 


26  A   PROTfiGfiE  act  ii 

lived  person.  And  though  they  do  complain,  what's  the  use 
of  {)aying  attention;  are  they  worth  your  notice?  Since  you 
do  so  many  good  deeds  for  others,  God  will  forgive  you,  our 
benefactress. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  All  the  same,  I  want  to  know  whom 
I  have  offended  ? 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Well,  there  are  some  persons, 
benefactress. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  [Forcibly]  But  who  ?     Speak  ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Don't  be  angry,  benefactress ! 
I  spoke  as  I  did  because  you  yourself  know  how  touchy 
people  are  nowadays — never  satisfied. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  You  spoke  as  you  did  in  order  to 
cause  me  some  unpleasantness. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  May  my  eyes  burst  if  I  did. 

IVIadam  Ulanbekov.  Well,  I  know  you.  You're  never  at 
rest  in  j'our  own  soul  unless  you're  about  to  say  something 
mean.  You  will  please  be  more  careful;  otherwise  you'll 
drive  me  out  of  patience  one  of  these  days;  it'll  be  all  the 
worse  for  you.  [Silence]  Serve  the  tea. 

Gavrilovna.  Right  away,  mistress. 

She   fours   out   two   cups.     Potapych    hands   them   to 
Madam  Ulanbekov  and  to  Vasilisa  Peregrinovna. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Pour  Grisha  a  cup,  too;  he  went 
with  me  to-day,  and  he's  tired  out. 

Gavrilov:na.  Yes,  mistress. 

[She  pours  out  a  cup  and  hands  it  to  Grisha. 

Grisha.  Why  didn't  you  put  more  milk  in  it?  Are  you 
stingy,  eh? 

Gavrilovna.  [Adding  milk]  As  it  is,  you're  fattened  on 
milk,  like  a  calf. 

Grisha  takes  the  cup  and  goes  out  through  the  door  into 
the  garden.  _       _         ,. 


SCENE  a  A   PROTfiGfiE  27 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  I  have  thought  of  marrying  Nadya 
to  Negligentov — ^with  a  (iecent  settlement,  of  course.  You 
say  that  he  leads  a  bad  life;  consequently  we  must  hasten 
the  wedding.  She  is  a  girl  of  good  principles,  she'll  hold  him 
back,  otherwise  he'll  ruin  himself  with  his  bachelor  habits. 
Bachelor  life  is  very  bad  for  young  men. 

Nadya.  [To  Liza]  Do  you  hear,  Liza.''  What's  this? 
My  God ! 

Liza.  You  just  have  to  listen,  and  you  can't  say  a  word. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  It's  high  time  she  was  married, 
benefactress;  why  should  she  be  hanging  around  here .''  And 
now  your  young  son,  the  angel,  has  come. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Oh,  be  still !  What  are  you  think- 
ing up  now  ?     Why,  he's  only  a  child  ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  A  child,  benefactress !  Well, 
there's  notlting  more  to  be  said;  God  gave  you  a  son  as  a 
joy  and  a  consolation.  And  we  can  never  feast  our  eyes 
enough  on  him.  It's  just  as  if  the  sunshine  had  come  into 
our  house.  So  good-natured,  so  merry,  so  gentle  with  every 
one!  But  he's  already  running  after  the  girls  so;  he  never 
lets  one  pass;  and  they,  silly  things,  are  tickled  to  death; 
they  fairly  snort  with  delight. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  You're  lying.  He  never  has  a 
chance  to  see  the  girls  anywhere,  I  think;  all  day  long  they 
are  in  their  own  side  of  the  house,  and,  besides,  they  never 
go  anywhere. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Ah,  benefactress,  there  are  no 
locks  to  keep  a  girl  in,  once  she  takes  a  notion  to  do  some- 
thing. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  You  hear,  Gavrilovna  !  Look  after 
my  girls.  You  know  I  won't  have  any  loose  conduct.  You 
tell  them  that  so  they'll  know  I  mean  it.  [To  Vasilisa  Pere- 
grinovna] But  no,  there  can't  be  anything  like  that.     You're 


28  A   PROTEGEE  act  ii 

merely  disturbing  me  with  your  silly  notions.  What  a  dirty 
tongue  you  have !  What  business  had  you  to  chatter  ? 
And  now  I  can't  get  the  stuff  out  of  my  head  !  Keep  watch, 
Gavrilovna ! 

Gavrilovna.  What's  the  use  of  listening  to  her,  mistress  ? 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  But  really,  benefactress,  am  I 
saying  anything  bad  ?  Would  I  dare  to  think  any  harm 
about  him,  that  little  angel  ?  Of  course  he's  still  a  child, 
he  wants  to  frisk  a  little;  but  here  he  hasn't  any  companions, 
so  he  plays  with  the  girls. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  There's  poison  on  your  tongue.  [iSfie 
reflects.  Potapych  takes  the  cups.  Gavrilovna  fills  them 
and  gives  them  back.  Grisha  comes  in  from  the  garden,  gives 
Gavrilovna  a  push,  and  makes  a  sign  ivith  his  head  that  she  is 
to  pour  him  another  cup.  Gavrilovna  does  so.  Grisha  goes 
out]  However,  I  must  marry  off  Nadya. 

Nadya.  [Almost  weeping]  Mistress,  you  have  show-n  me 
such  kindness  that  I  can't  even  express  it.  Forgive  me  for 
daring  to  speak  to  you  now;  but,  because  of  your  attitude 
towards  me,  I  expected  quite  a  different  favor  from  you.  In 
what  respect  have  I  displeased  you  now,  mistress,  that  you 
wish  to  marry  me  to  a  drunkard? 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  My  dear,  it's  not  for  you  to  argue 
about  that;  you're  just  a  girl.  You  ought  to  rely  in  all 
tilings  upon  me,  your  patroness.  I  brought  you  up,  and  I 
am  even  bound  to  establish  you  in  life.  And  again,  you 
ought  not  to  forget  this:  that  he  is  my  godson.  Rather,  you 
ought  to  be  thankful  for  the  honor.  And  now  I  tell  you 
once  and  for  all :  1  do  not  like  it  when  my  girls  argue,  I  simply 
do  not  like  it,  and  that's  all  there  is  to  it.  That's  a  thing  I 
cannot  permit  anybody.  I've  been  accustomed,  from  my 
youth,  to  having  people  obey  my  every  word;  it's  time  you 
knew  that !     And  it's  very  strange  to  me,  my  dear,  that  you 


SCENE  III  A   PROTEGEE  29 

should  presume  to  oppose  me.     I  see  that  I  have  spoiled 
you;    and  you  at  once  get  conceited.  [Nadya  weeps. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Benefactress,  one  must  have 
feeling  for  his  fellow  creature,  one  must  have  feeling.  But 
what  kind  of  feelings  can  such  as  they  have,  save  ingrati- 
tude ? 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  No  one's  talking  to  you  !  What  are 
you  mixing  into  everything  for.''  [To  Nadya,  sternly]  What 
new  tale  is  this  ?  Still  crying !  Let's  have  no  more  tears ! 
[Nadya  weeps]  I'm  talking  to  you.  [Rising  slightly]  Your 
tears  mean  absolutely  nothing  to  me !  When  I  make  up 
my  mind  to  do  a  thing,  I  take  a  firm  stand,  and  listen  to  no 
one  on  earth  !  [She  sits  down]  And  know,  first  of  all,  that 
your  obstinacy  will  lead  to  nothing;  you  will  simply  anger 
me. 

Nadya.  [Weeping]  I'm  an  orphan,  mistress !  Your  will 
must  be  obeyed ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Well,  I  should  say !  Of  course  it 
must;  because  I  brought  you  up;  that's  equal  to  giving  you 
life  itself. 

Leonid  enters. 

SCENE    III 

The  same  and  Leonid 

Leonid.  How  are  you,  mamma.'' 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  How  are  you,  my  dear.''  Where 
have  you  been.^ 

Leonid.  I  went  hunting  with  Potapych.  I  killed  two 
ducks,  mamma. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  You  don't  spare  your  mother;  the 
idea,  going  hunting  in  your  state  of  health  !     You'll  fall  sick 


30  A   PROTEGEE  act  n 

again,  God  forbid  !  and  then  you'll  simply  kill  nie  !  Ah,  my 
God,  how  I  have  suffiTcd  with  that  child  !  [She  muses. 

Gavkilovna.  Some  tea,  master? 

Leonid.  No,  thanks. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  [To  Vasilisa  Peregrinovna]  When 
he  was  born,  I  was  ill  a  very  long  time.  Then  he  was  al- 
ways sickly,  and  he  grew  up  puny.  How  many  tears  have 
I  shed  over  him !  Sometimes  I  would  just  look  at  him,  and 
my  tears  would  flow;  no,  it  will  never  be  my  lot  to  see  him 
in  the  uniform  of  the  guardsmen !  But  it  was  most  distress- 
ing of  all  for  me  when  his  father,  owing  to  the  boy's  poor 
health,  was  unable  to  send  him  to  a  military  school.  How 
much  it  cost  me  to  renounce  the  thought  that  he  might  be- 
come a  soldier !  For  half  a  year  I  was  ill.  Just  imagine  to 
yourself,  my  dear,  when  he  finishes  his  course,  they  will  give 
him  some  rank  or  other,  such  as  they  give  to  any  priest's 
son  clerking  in  a  government  office  !  Isn't  it  awful  ?  In  the 
military  service,  especially  in  the  cavalry,  all  ranks  are  aris- 
tocratic; one  knows  at  once  that  even  a  junker  is  from  the 
nobility.  But  what  is  a  provincial  secretary,  or  a  titular 
councillor !  Any  one  can  be  a  titular  councillor — even  a 
merchant,  a  church-school  graduate,  a  low-class  townsman, 
if  you  please.  You  have  only  to  study,  then  serve  awhile. 
Why,  one  of  the  petty  townsmen  who  is  apt  at  learning 
will  get  a  rank  higher  than  his  !  That's  the  way  of  the  world  ! 
That's  the  way  of  the  world  !  Oh,  dear  !  [She  turns  away  with 
a  wave  of  her  hand]  I  don't  like  to  pass  judgment  on  any- 
thing that  is  instituted  by  higher  authority,  and  won't  per- 
mit others  to  do  so,  but,  nevertheless,  I  don't  approve  of  this 
system.     I  shall  always  say  loudly  that  it's  unjust,  unjust. 

Leonid.  Why  are  Nadya's  eyes  red  from  crying.' 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  She  hasn't  been  flogged  for  a 
long  time. 


SCENE  III 


A   PROTEGEE  31 


Madam  Ulanbekov.  That's  none  of  your  business,  my 
dear.     Nadya,  go  away,  you're  not  needed  here. 

[Nadya  goes  out. 

Leonid,  Well,  I  know  why:  you  want  to  marry  her  off. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Whether  I  do  or  not,  my  dear,  is 
my  own  business.  Furthermore,  I  do  not  like  to  have  any 
one  meddle  in  my  arrangements. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  What  a  clever  young  man  you 
are;   you  know  everything,  you  get  into  everything ! 

Leonid.  Indeed,  mamma  dear,  I  don't  mean  to  meddle  in 
your  arrangements.     Only  he's  a  drunkard. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  And  that,  again,  is  none  of  your 
business.     Leave  that  to  your  mother's  judgment. 

Leonid.  I'm  onlj'  sorry  for  her,  mamma. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  All  very  fine,  my  dear;  but  I  should 
like  to  know  from  whom  you  heard  that  I'm  going  to  marry 
Nadya.     If  one  of  the  housemaids  has.  .  .  . 

Leonid.  No,  mamma,  no. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  How  could  you  find  out  otherwise  ? 
How  did  that  get  out.'*  [To  Gavrilovna]  Find  out  without 
fail! 

Leonid.  No,  indeed,  mamma;  the  man  she's  going  to 
marry  told  me. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  What  sort  of  a  man  ? 

Leonid.  I  don't  know  what  sort !  He  said  he  was  a  clerk 
in  a  government  office.  .  .  .a  peculiar  surname:  Negligentov. 
What  a  fumiy  fellow  he  is  !  He  says  he's  your  godson,  and 
that  he's  afraid  of  nobody.  He's  dancing  in  the  garden  now, 
drunk. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Drunk,  in  my  house ! 

Leonid.  If  you  want,  I'll  invite  him  in.  Potapych,  call 
Negligentov !  He  said  that  you  were  at  his  uncle's  to-day, 
and  that  you  promised  to  give  him  Nadya.     Already  he's 


32  A    PROTfiGfiE  ACT  a 

reckoning,  in  anticipation,  liow  much  income  he  will  get  in 
the  court,  or  "savings,"  as  he  says.  What  a  funny  fellow! 
He  showed  me  how  they  taught  him  at  school.  Do  you 
want  me  to  bring  him  in  ? 

Enter  Potapych  and  Negligentov.  . 


SCENE    IV 

The  same,  Negligentov  a?id  Potapych 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Oh,  oh,  how  disgusting !  Don"t 
come  near  me ! 

Negligentov.  I'm  sent  from  uncle  to  thank  you  for  your 
bounty. 

Leonid.  He  says,  mamma,  that  they  taught  him  a  good 
deal,  only  it  was  impossible  for  him  to  learn  anything. 

Negligentov.  Impossible;  from  my  birth  I  had  no  apti- 
tude for  the  sciences.  I  received  from  fifty  to  a  hundred 
birch  rods  nearly  every  day,  but  they  didn't  ciuicken  my 
understanding. 

Leonid.  Oh,  mamma,  how  amusingly  he  tells  about  the 
way  he  learned  !  Here,  just  listen.  Well,  and  how  did  you 
learn  Latin  ? 

Negligentov.  Turpissime ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  [iShrugf/itiy  her  shoulders]  What  in 
the  world  is  that."' 

Negligentov.  Most  abominably. 

Leonid.  No,  wait  a  bit;  and  what  did  the  teacher  do  with 
you  ? 

Negligentov.  [Bursts  out  laughing]  It  made  you  laugh. 
Once,  after  a  cruel  torture,  he  commanded  two  students  to 
fasten  me  by  the  neck  with  a  belt,  and  to  lead  me  through 
the  market-place  as  a  laughing-stock. 


SCENE  IV  A   PROTEGEE  33 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  How  is  it  they  took  you  into  the 
civil  service  if  you  never  learned  anything? 

Negligentov.  Through  the  mediation  of  influential 
people. 

Leonid.  And  did  they  expel  you  from  school .'' 

Negligentov.  They  didn't  expel  me;  but  they  excluded 
me  because  I  grew  too  much. 

Leonid.  Grew  too  much.'' 

Negligentov.  Well,  as  I,  during  all  this  teaching  and 
grilling,  remaining  in  the  lower  grades,  was  getting  on  in 
years,  and  grew  more  than  the  other  fellows  of  my  class,  of 
course  I  was  excluded  because  I  was  too  big.  I  suffered  all 
the  more  from  the  venality  of  those  at  the  head.  Our  rector 
liked  gifts;  and  a  week  before  the  examinations,  he  sent  us 
all  to  our  parents  for  presents.  According  to  the  number  of 
these  presents,  we  were  promoted  to  the  higher  classes. 

Leonid.  What  was  your  conduct  like.^ 

Negligentov.  Reprehensible. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  What  in  the  world  !  Good  heavens  ! 
Go  away,  my  dear  sir,  go  away ! 

Leonid.  Oh,  mamina,  he's  comical;  wait  a  bit  before 
driving  him  out.     Dance,  Negligentov  ! 

Negligentov.  [Dances  and  sings] 

"I  shall  go,  shall  go  to  mow 
LIpon  the  meadow  green." 

Grisha  bursts  out  laughing. 
Madam    Ulanbekov.  Stop,    stop !  [Negligentov    ceases. 
To  Grisha]  What  are  you  laughing  at? 

Grisha.  The  member  dances  very  comically. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  What  do  you  mean,  "member"? 

Grisha.  Why,  he  himself  tells  us  all  that  he  is  a  member 


34  A   PROTfiGfiE  act  n 

in  the  court,  not  a  copy-clerk.  And  so  they  call  him  the 
member. 

Negligentov.  I  call  myself  the  member,  although  falsely, 
but  expressly  for  the  respect  of  the  court  menials,  and  in 
order  to  escape  scoffing  and  insult. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Be  gone,  and  don't  you  ever  dare  to 
show  yourself  to  me ! 

Negligentov.  Uncle  says  that  I  fell  into  loose  living  be- 
cause of  my  bachelor  life,  and  that  I  may  get  mired  in  it 
unless  you  show  me  your  favor. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  No,  no,  never ! 

Negligentov.  [On  his  hiccs]  Uncle  told  me  to  beg  you 
with  tears,  because  I  am  a  hjst  man,  subject  to  many  vices, 
and,  without  your  favor,  I  shall  not  be  tolerated  in  the  civil 
service. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Tell  your  uncle  that  I  shall  always 
be  your  benefactress;  but  don't  you  even  think  about  a 
wife  !     Be  gone,  be  gone  ! 

Negligentov.  I  thank  you  for  not  deserting  me!  [To 
Grisha]  Ask  the  mistress  to  let  you  go  to  the  fair,  and  catch 
up  with  me !  [He  goes  out. 

SCENE    V 

The  same,  except  Negligentov 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  How  easy  it  is  to  be  mistaken  in 
people !  You  take  pains  for  them,  work  your  head  off,  and 
they  don't  even  feel  it.  I  should  have  been  glad  to  establish 
that  boy  in  life,  but  he  crawls  into  the  house  drunk.  Now, 
if  he's  a  prey  to  that  weakness,  he  ought,  at  least,  to  try  to 
hide  it  from  me.  Let  him  drink  where  he  will,  but  don't 
let  me  see  it !     I  should  know,  at  least,  that  he  respected 


SCENE  V 


A    PROTfiGfiE  35 


me.  What  clownishness !  What  impudence !  Whom  will 
he  be  afraid  of,  pray  tell,  if  not  of  me? 

Leonid.  Oh,  what  a  comical  fellow  !  Don't  be  angry  with 
me,  mamma.  When  I  found  out  that  you  wanted  to  marry 
Nadya  to  him,  I  felt  sorry  for  her.  And  you're  so  good  to 
everybody !  [He  kisses  her  hand]  I  didn't  want  you  to  do 
anything  unjust. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Such  people  fairly  drive  you  into 
sin.  [Kissing  him]  You  have  a  beautiful  soul,  my  dear!  [To 
Vasilisa  Peregrinovna]  Indeed,  I  have  always  thought 
that  God  himself  sometimes  speaks  with  the  lips  of  babes. 
Liza !  Go  tell  Nadezhda  not  to  cry,  that  I  have  turned  out 
Negligentov. 

Liza.  Yes,  ma'am.  [She  goes  out. 

Grisha.  [Approaches,  swaggering,  and  stops  in  a  free  and 
easy  pose]  Mistress ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  What's  the  matter  with  you.' 

Grisha.  Let  me  go  down-town;   to-day's  a  holiday  there. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  What  do  you  want  to  go  for.''  To 
stare  at  the  drunkards.'' 

Grisha.  [Clasping  his  hands  behind  him]  Please,  ma'am. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  No,  most  certainly  not ! 

Grisha.  Please  do,  mistress. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  I  tell  you,  positively,  no !  One's 
morals  are  just  spoiled  at  these  fairs.  Your  greedy  ears  will 
take  in  all  kinds  of  nastiness  !  You're  still  a  boy;  that's  no 
place  for  you ! 

Grisha.  No,  but  please  let  me,  ma'am. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  You  stay  right  here  !  Put  that  non- 
sense out  of  your  head  ! 

Grisha.  Well,  I  declare !  I  slave,  and  slave,  and  can't 
ever  go  anywhere ! 


36  A   PROTfiGfiE  act  ii 

Vasilisa  Peregrino\^"A.  Oh  me,  oh  my !  Oh  me,  oh 
my  !     How  spoiled  you  are  !     How  spoiled  you  are  ! 

Madam  Ul,.\nbekov.  What  are  you  cackling  about? 
Keep  still ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  But  how  can  I  keep  still,  bene- 
factress ?  Such  lack  of  feeling !  Such  ingratitude !  It 
pierces  the  heart. 

Mad.ajvi  Ulanbekov.  I  command  you  to  keep  still,  and 
you  must  keep  still ! 

Grisha.  Please  let  me,  ma'am ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  As  if  the  mistress  didn't  love 
you,  as  if  she  didn't  fondle  you,  more,  if  anything,  than  her 
own  son ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  [Stamping  her  foot]  Shhh  ! .  .  .  .  I'll 
turn  you  out ! 

Grisha.  I  want  awfully  to  go  to  the  fair;  please  let  me, 
ma'am. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Well,  go  along  then !  but  come  buck 
early ! 

Grisha.  Yes,  ma'am. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Kiss  the  dear  lady's  hand,  you 
blockhead ! 

Grisha.  What  are  you  trying  to  teach  me  for?  I  know 
my  own  business.    [He  kisses  the  mistress's  hand  and  goes  out. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  As  for  you,  my  dear,  if  I  ever  hear 
anything  like  this  again,  I'll  have  them  drive  you  off  the 
place  with  brooms. 

She  goes  out.     Vasilisa  Peregrinovna  remains  stand- 
ing in  a  stupor. 


SCENE  VII  A   PROTEGfiE  37 


SCENE    VI 

The  same,  except  Madam  Ulanbekov;  then  Liza 

Leonid.  Well,  you  caught  it,  didn't  you?  And  you  de- 
served it,  too ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  I'll  have  my  turn  yet. 
Liza  enters. 

Liza.  [Quietly  to  Leonid]  Nadya  .sent  me  to  say  that  we'll 
come  to  the  garden. 

Leonid.  Give  her  a  kiss  from  me. 

Gavrilovna.  God  give  you  health,  master,  for  taking 
our  part.  Any  wretch  can  izisult  us;  but  there's  no  one  to 
take  our  part.  You'll  get  a  rich  reward  for  that  in  the  next 
world. 

Leonid.  I'm  always  ready  to  help  you. 

[He  goes  out  to  the  right,  tvith  a  caper. 

Gavrilovna.  Thanks,  my  dear  ! 

[She  goes  out  with  Liza,  to  the  left. 

SCENE    VII 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna  and  Potapych 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Why  don't  you  insult  me? 
They  all  insult  me,  why  don't  you?  You  heard  how  she 
herself  wanted  to  flog  me;  "I'll  have  them  do  it  with 
brooms,"  she  said.     May  her  words  choke  her  ! 

Potapych.  What,  I ! .  .  .  .  I  insult  anybody  !  But  as  to 
the  gentlefolk  there.  .  .  .1  don't  know,  but  perhaps  they  have 
to. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Do  you  see  what's  going  on  in 
this  house !  Do  you  see  ?  Do  you  understand  it,  or  don't 
you  ?     Just  now  when  I  began  to  talk  about  Grisha,  you 


38  A   PROTEGf:E  act  ii 

heard  how  she  began  to  roar?  You  lieard  how  she  began 
to  hiss? 

PoTAPYCH.  What's  that  to  me  ?  I,  by  the  mistress's  kind- 
ness, in  her  employ.  .  .  .1  shall  carry  out  all  her  orders.  .  .  . 
What  business  is  it  of  mine  ?  I  don't  want  to  know  anything 
that  isn't  my  business. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  But  did  you  see  how  Nadya 
and  Liza— the  hussies ! — looked  at  me  ?  Did  you  see  how 
the  snakes  looked  ?  Ha  !  I  must  look  after  them,  I  must ! 
[Potapych,  with  a  wave  of  his  hand,  goes  out]  Bah !  you  !  you 
old  blockhead  !  What  people  !  What  people  !  There's  no 
one  to  whom  I  can  talk,  and  relieve  my  heart.     [She  goes  out. 


Ill 

Part  of  the  garden;  to  the  rear,  a  pond,  on  the  shore  of  which 
is  a  boat.  Starry  night.  A  choral  song  is  heard  in  the 
far  distance.     For  a  while  the  stage  is  empty. 

SCENE    I 

Enter  Nadya  and  Liza 

Liza.  Oh,  Nadya,  what's  tliis  we're  doing?  When  the 
mistress  hears  of  tliis,  it'll  be  your  last  daj'  on  earth. 

Nadya.  If  you're  afraid,  take  yourself  home. 

Liza.  No,  I'll  wait  for  you.  But  all  the  same,  my  girl, 
it's  awful,  no  matter  what  you  say !  Lord  preserve  us  when 
she  finds  it  out. 

Nadya.  Always  singing  the  same  tune !  If  you  fear  the 
wolf,  keep  out  of  the  woods. 

Liza.  But  what  has  happened  to  you  ?  Before,  you  didn't 
talk  like  this.  You  used  to  hide  yourself;  and  now  you  go 
to  him  of  your  own  accord. 

Nadya.  Yes,  before  I  ran  away  from  him;  now  I  don't 
want  to.  [She  stands  musing]  Now  I  myself  don't  know  what 
has  suddenly  happened  within  me !  Just  when  the  mistress 
said,  a  short  while  ago,  that  I  shouldn't  dare  to  argue,  but 
marry  the  man  she  said  to  marry,  just  then  my  whole  heart 
revolted.  "Oh,  Lord,  what  a  life  for  me!"  I  thought.  [She 
xveeps]  What's  the  use  in  my  living  purely,  guarding  myself 
not  merely  from  every  word,  but  even  from  every  look? 
Even  so,  evil  seized  upon  me.     "Why,"  I  thought,  "should 

39 


40  A   PROTfiGfiE  act  iir 

I  guard  myself?"  I  don't  want  to!  I  don't  want  to!  It 
was  just  as  if  my  heart  died  witliin  me.  It  seemed  that  if 
she  said  another  word,  I  should  die  on  the  spot. 

Liza.  What  are  you  saying !  Why,  I  really  thought  you 
were  coming  to  the  master  as  a  joke. 

Nadya.  As  a  joke !  I  can't  hear  an  insult !  I  cannot. 
[Silrtirc]  Oh,  Liza,  if  life  were  better,  I  shouldn't  have  come 
into  the  garden  at  night.  You  know  how  it  used  to  be, 
when  I  would  think  al)out  myself — I  suppose  it  must  have 
come  into  your  head,  too — that  here  you  are,  an  honest  girl; 
you  live  like  a  bird,  suddenly  you're  fascinated  by  some  man, 
he  makes  love  to  you,  comes  to  see  you  often,  kisses  you.  .  .  . 
You're  abashed  before  liim,  yet  happy  to  see  him.  That's 
the  way  it  always  is.  Although  you  may  not  be  rich;  al- 
though it  may  be  you  have  to  sit  with  your  lover  in  the 
servants'  room;  yet  it  is  as  if  j'ou  were  a  queen,  just  as  if 
every  day  were  a  holiday  for  you.  Then  they  marry  you, 
and  all  congratulate  you.  Well,  then,  no  matter  how  hard 
married  life  may  be,  perhaps  there  may  be  lots  of  work,  in 
spite  of  that  you  live  as  if  in  paradise;  just  as  if  you  w'ere 
proud  of  something. 

Liza.  Naturally,  my  girl. 

Nadya.  But  when  they  say  to  you:  "Pack  oflF  to  tliis 
drunkard,  and  don't  you  dare  argue,  and  don't  you  dare  cry 
over  yourself!"....  Oh,  Liza!....  And  then  you  think 
how  that  horrid  man  will  make  fun  of  you,  will  bully  you, 
show  his  authority,  will  begin  to  ruin  your  life,  all  for  noth- 
ing !  You  grow  old  by  his  side  without  having  a  chance  to 
live.  [She  weeps]  It  breaks  your  heart  even  to  tell  about 
it !  [Waving  her  hand]  And  so,  indeed,  the  young  master  is 
better. 

Liza.  Oh,  Nadya;  it  would  be  better  if  you  hadn't  spoken, 
and  I  hadn't  listened  I 


SCENE  I 


A   PROTEGEE  41 


Nadya.  Stop,  Liza !  Why  are  you  playing  the  prude 
with  me?  What  would  you  do  yourself  if  the  master  fell 
in  love  with  you  ? 

Liza.  [Stammering]  Well,  how  should  I  know  ?  Of  course, 
what  shall  I  say ....  the  old  Nick  is  strong. 

Nadya.  There  you  are ! .  .  .  .  [Silence]  Here  is  what  I 
wanted  to  say  to  you,  Liza.  What  a  strange  inspiration  has 
come  over  me !  When  such  thoughts  came  into  my  head, 
and,  Liza,  when  I  began  to  think  about  the  master — then 
how  dear  he  became  to  me !  ....  so  dear,  that,  really,  I  can't 
tell.  .  .  .  Before,  when  he  ran  after  me,  I  didn't  care;  but 
now  it's  just  as  if  something  drew  me  to  him. 

Liza.  Oh,  my  girl !     Just  think  of  it;   surely  this  is  fate! 

Nadya.  And  such  a  .spirit  came  into  me,  I  am  afraid  of 
nothing !  I  feel  as  if  you  could  cut  me  to  pieces,  and  still 
I'd  not  change  my  mind.  And  why  this  is  so,  I  don't  know. 
[Silence]  I  could  hardly  wait  till  night !  It  seems  as  if  I 
could  fly  to  him  on  wings !  The  one  thing  that  I  have  in 
mind  is  that,  at  any  rate,  I  am  not  a  pretty  girl  for  nothing ; 
I  shall  have  something  by  which  to  remember  my  youth. 
[Musingly]  I  thought  to  myself:  "What  a  young  man,  how 
handsome !  Am  I,  silly  girl  that  I  am,  worth  his  loving 
me.''"  May  I  be  choked  here,  in  this  lonely  spot,  if  he  does 
not. 

Liza.  What's  this,  Nadya.'*     You  seem  beside  yourself. 

Nadya.  And  I  really  am  beside  myself.  While  she  spoiled 
me,  caressed  me,  then  I  thought  that  I  was  a  person  like 
other  people;  and  my  thoughts  about  life  were  entirely 
different.  But  when  she  began  to  conmiand  me,  like  a  doll; 
when  I  saw  that  I  was  to  have  no  will  of  my  own,  and  no 
protection,  then,  Liza,  despair  fell  upon  me.  What  became 
of  my  fear,  of  my  shame — I  don't  know.  "Only  one  day, 
but  mine!"  I  thought;   "then  come  what  may,  I  don't  care 


42  A  PR0T£G£E 


ACT  III 


to   inquire.     Marry   me   off   to   a  herdsman,  lock  me  in  a 
castle  with  thirty  locks  !.  .  .  .it's  all  the  same  to  me!" 
Liza.  I  think  the  master's  coming. 

Leonid  enters  from  the  opposite  side,  in  a  cloak. 
Nadya.  Well,  Liza,  isn't  he  handsome,  ha.' 
Liza.  Oh,  stop !     You're  either  sick  or  half  out  of  your 
head ! 

SCENE    II 

The  same  and  Leonid 

Leonid.  [Approaching]  I  was  tliinking  you  would  deceive 
me  by  not  coming. 

Nadya.  Why  did  you  think  so.' 

Leonid.  Well,  you  see,  you  said  you  didn't  love  me. 

Nadya.  No  matter  what  girls  say,  don't  you  believe  them. 
How  could  one  help  loving  such  a  handsome  fellow.? 

Leonid.  [Surprised]  Why,  Nadya ! 

He  takes  her  hand,  for  a  short  time  holds  it,  then  kisses  it. 

Nadya.  [In  fright    withdraiving    her   hand]  Oh !    why    did 
you  do  that  2     Dear,  kind  master  !     Aren't  you  ashamed .'' 

Leonid.  I  love  you  ever  so  much,  Nadya ! 

Nadya.  You  love  me.'*     Well,  then,  you  might  give  me  a 
kiss ! 

Leonid.  May  I,  Nadya?     Will  you  let  me.'' 

Nadya.  What's  the  harm  in  it.'* 

Leonid.  [Turning  about]  Oh,  and  you,  Liza,  here.  .  . , 

Liza.  I'm  going,  I'm  going.  .  .  .1  shan't  meddle. 

Leonid.  [Confused]  I  didn't  mean  that.     Where  did  you 
get  that  idea? 

Liza.  Oh,  don't  dodge.     We  know,  too.  .  .  . 

[She  goes  out  behind  the  shrubs. 


SCENE  II  A   PROTfiGfiE  43 

Leonid.  And  so  you  will  let  me  kiss  you?  [He  kisses  her 
timidly]  No,  no,  let  me  kiss  your  hand. 

Nadya.  [Hides  her  hand]  No,  no,  how  could  you  !     What 
do  you  mean.  .  .  . 

Leonid.  Why  not?     I'll  tell  you  what,  you  are  the  most 
precious  thing  on  earth  to  me. 

Nadya.  Is  that  really  so? 

Leonid.  You  see,  no  one  ever  loved  me  before. 

Nadya.  Aren't  you  fooling? 

Leonid.  No,  truly ! .  .  .  .     Trulj-,  no  one  has  ever  loved 
me.     Honest  to  God.  .  .  . 

Nadya.  Don't  swear;  I  believe  you  without  it. 

Leonid.  Let's  go  sit  down  on  the  bench. 

Nadya.  Yes,  let's.  [They  sit  down. 

Leonid.  Why  do  you  tremble  so? 

Nadya.  Am  I  trembling? 

Leonid.  You  are. 

Nadya.  Then,  it  must  be  that  I  feel  a  bit  chilly. 

Leonid.  Just  let  me  wrap  you  up. 

He  covers  her  with  one  side  of  his  cloak,  embracing  her 
as  he  holds  it  around  her.  She  takes  his  hand  and 
holds  it. 

Nadya.  And  now  let's  sit  this  way  and  talk. 

Leonid.  What  are  we  going  to  talk  about?     I  shall  say 
only  one  thing  to  you:  I  love  you. 

Nadya.  You  will  say  it,  and  I  shall  listen. 

Leonid.  You'll  get  tired  of  one  and  the  same  thing. 

Nadya.  Maybe  you'll  get  tired  of  it;    I  never  shall. 

Leonid.  Then  let  me  speak.     I  love  you,  little  Nadya. 

[He  rises  and  kisses  her. 

Nadya.  Why  do  you  do  that?     Just  sit  quietly,  as  we 
said  we  would. 

Leonid.  Shall  we  sit  like  this,  with  our  hands  folded  ? 


44  A   PROTfiGEE  act  iii 

Nadya.  [La)i(/hiny\  Like  that.  Hear,  a  nightingale  is 
singing  in  the  thicket.  Sit  down  and  Hsten.  How  nice  it 
is  to  Hsten  ! 

Leonid.  Liketliis? 

Nadya.  Yes,  as  we  sit  together.  It  seems  as  if  I  eonld  sit 
here  all  my  life  and  listen.  What  could  be  better,  what 
more  could  one  want.^  .... 

Leonid.  Nadya,  dear,  that  would  really  be  a  bore. 

Nadya.  What  fellows  you  men  are  !  You  get  sick  of  things 
in  no  time.  But  I,  you  see,  am  ready  to  sit  out  the  whole 
night,  to  look  at  you,  without  lowering  my  eyes.  It  seems 
as  if  I  shoulfl  forget  the  whole  world ! 

Tears  start  in  her  eyes,  she  bends  her  head,  and  then 
looks  at  Leonid  fixedly  and  musingly. 

Leonid.  Now  it  would  be  nice  to  go  rowing;  it  is  warm, 
the  moon  is  shining. 

Nadya.  [Absently  and  almost  mechanically]  What  is  it,  sir.'' 

Leonid.  To  go  rowing;  I  should  row  j'ou  out  to  the  little 
island.  It  is  so  pleasant  there,  on  the  island.  Well,  let's 
go.  [He  takes  her  by  the  hand. 

Nadya.  [In  a  revery]  Where,  sir  .^ 

Leonid.  W^here,  where .^     I  told  you;  didn't  you  hear  me ? 

Nadya.  Oh,  forgive  me,  dearest  master.  I  was  thinking 
and  didn't  hear  anything.     Dearest  master,  forgive  me ! 

[She  lays  her  head  upon  his  shoulder. 

Leonid.  I  say,  let's  go  to  the  island. 

Nadya.  [Nestling  up  to  him]  Oh,  wherever  you  please ! 
Even  to  the  end  of  the  world  !  If  only  with  you ....  Take 
me  wherever  you  want. 

Leonid.  Nadya,  you  are  so  good,  so  sweet,  that  it  seems 
as  if  I  must  burst  out  crying,  just  to  look  at  you.  [They  ap- 
proach the  boat]  Good-by,  Liza. 

Liza.  [Coming  from  the  bushes,  she  makes  a  warning  gesture] 


SCENE  III 


A   PROTEGEE  45 


Look  out,  you  two !  [Leonid  and  Nadya  sit  doivn  in  the  boat 
and  move  away]  There,  they've  gone  !  And  I  must  wait  here 
for  them  !  This  is  awful,  simply  awful !  At  night,  in  the 
garden,  and  all  alone,  too  !  What  a  fix  for  me — afraid  of 
everything,  and.  .  .  .  [She  glances  about  her]  Heavens,  this  is 
deadly  !  If  there  were  only  somebody  here,  it  would  be  all 
right,  I'd  have  somebody  to  talk  to.  Holy  Saints !  Some- 
body's coming!  [She  looks]  Oh,  all  right;  just  our  old  folks 
from  the  fair.  [She  hides  herself. 


SCENE    III 

Enter  Potapych  in  an  overcoat  and  a  broad-brimmed  hat,  and 
with  a  cane,  somewhat  tipsy;  Gavrilovna  in  an  old- 
fashioned  bonnet.     They  sit  down  on  the  bench. 

Potapych.  No,  Gavrilovna,'  not  that.  .  .  .don't  say 
that ! .  .  .  .  Our  lady  is  so ...  .  such  a  kind  mistress  ! .  .  .  . 
Here,  we  asked  if  we  could  go  to  the  fair,  and  she  said  to  go 
along.  .  .  .  But  what  they  say  about  her.  .  .  that  I  don't 
know:  it's  not  my  business,  and  so  I  don't  know  anything 
about  it. 

Gavrilovna.  Why  not  let  us  go,  Potapych.^  You  and 
I  are  not  youngsters;  we  shan't  be  spoiled  ! 

Potapych.  You  can't  let  the  young  folks  go,  because  you 
must  have  models  for  everything,  Gavrilovna.  Whatever 
models  a  person  has  in  front  of  him,  he  may,  very  likely .... 
most  probably .... 

Gavrilovna.  Well,  why  did  she  let  Grisha  go  .^  She  said 
she  wouldn't;    well,  and  then  she  ought  not  to  have  done  it. 

Potapych.  Vasilisa  Peregrinovna  stirred  me  up  a  lot  on 
Grisha's  account  a  while  ago.  .  .  .she  stirred  me  up  a  lot, 


46  A   PROT£g£E  act  III 

but  I  don't  know.  It's  not  my  business,  so  I  don't  know 
anything  about  it. 

Gavkilovna.  What's  this  you  were  saying  about  models  ? 
It  would  be  better  for  her  to  show  a  better  example  herself ! 
As  it  is,  she  only  keeps  shouting:  "Watch,  I  tell  you,  watch 
the  girls!"  But  what's  the  use  of  watching  them.'*  Are 
they  all  babies  ?  Every  person  has  liis  own  brains  in  his 
head.  Let  every  one  think  for  himself.  All  you  need  to  do 
is  to  look  out  for  the  five-year-olds,  that  they  don't  spoil 
something  or  other.  What  a  life  for  a  girl !  There's  nothing 
worse  on  earth !  But  the  mistress  doesn't  want  to  consider 
whether  a  girl  gets  much  fun  out  of  life.  W^ell,  does  she  get 
much  ?     Say ! 

PoTAPYCH.  [Sighs]  A  dog's  life. 

Gavkilovna.  It  surely  is !  Consequently  one  ought  to 
pity  them  and  not  insult  them  at  every  step.  As  it  is,  it's 
simply  awful!  Nobody  trusts  them  at  all;  it's  just  as  if 
they  weren't  human  beings.  Just  let  a  girl  poke  her  nose 
out,  and  the  guards  are  on  the  job ! 

PoTAPYCH.  But  you  can't.  .  .  . 

Gavkilovna.  Can't  what?  You  can  do  everything. 
That'll  do,  Potapych !  You're  used  to  saying  over  other 
people's  words  like  a  magpie;    but  just  think  for  yourself. 

Potapych.  But  I  don't  know.  .  .  .1  don't  know  anything, 

Gavkilovna.  You  won't  gain  anything  through  severity. 
You  may  tell  'em,  if  you  please,  that  they'll  be  hung  for  such- 
and-such;  they'll  go  and  do  it  anyway.  Where  there's  the 
greatest  strictness,  there's  the  most  sin.  You  ought  to  reason 
like  a  human  being.  No  matter  if  our  masters  pay  money 
for  their  wits  while  we  have  only  what  we're  born  with,  we 
have  our  own  way  of  thinking,  all  the  same.  It's  all  right 
to  lay  down  the  law  strictly;  but  don't  always  punish  a 
fellow  who  makes  a  slip;    let  him  off  now  and  then.     Some 


SCENE  V 


A  PROTEGEE  47 


bad   comes   from  spoiling  people;    but    now  and   then   you 
can't  help  going  wrong. 

PoTAPYCH.  Now,  if  you  ask  me.  .  .  .what  can  I  answer  to 
that  .'*     How  can  I  answer  you  .' 

Gavrilovna.  Well,  how  'i 

PoTApycH.  Just  this:  I  don't  know  anything  about  it, 
because  it  isn't  my  business.  .  .  .it's  the  mistress's  business. 

Gavrilovna.  Bah,  you  old  idiot !  You've  lost  your  wits 
in  your  old  age. 

Potapych.  Why  should  I.  .  .  .1,  thanks  to  the  lady's  kind- 
ness, now  in  her  employ ....  I  carry  out  all  her  orders ....  but 
I  don't  know. 

Gavrilovna.  Well,  let's  go  home.  She  may  have  thought 
up  something  or  other  about  even  you  and  me. 

{They  go  out. 

SCENE    IV 

Liza.  [Enters]  Alone  again !  Where  are  those  precious 
darlings  of  mine  ?  I  suppose  they've  forgotten  about  me ! 
But,  then,  why  should  they  remember  me.''  Saints  alive, 
it'll  soon  be  daylight.  This  night  is  shorter  than  a  sparrow's 
beak.  How  can  we  go  home  then .''  How  brave  that  Nadya 
is! 

Enter  Vasilisa  Peregrinovna. 

SCENE    V 

Liza  and  Vasilisa  Peregrinovna 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  What  are  you  doing  there, 
dearest .'' 

Liza.  Can't  you  see?     I'm  taking  a  stroll. 


48  A    PROTfiGfiE  act  m 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  I  see !  How  can  I  help  it  ? 
But  what  kind  of  a  night-walk  is  this? 

Liza.  Well,  when  can  we  go  walking?  We  work  all  day 
and  wait  on  the  gentry,  and  we  go  walking  at  night.  But  I 
am  surprised  at  you  !  Don't  you  walk  enough  daytimes 
that  you  still  want  to  wander  around  at  night  and  scare 
people,  just  like.  .  .  . 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Just  like  what?.  .  .  .  Well,  say 
it,  say  it ! 

Liza.  What?     Oh.  nothing. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  No,  you  said,  "Just  like".... 
well,  say  it  now;  just  like  who? 

Liza.  I  said  what  I  said. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  No,  don't  you  dare  sneak  out 
of  it !     Come,  speak  up  ! 

Liza.  Why  did  you  stick  to  it?  All  right,  I'll  tell  you: 
like  a  spook. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  What,  what !  Like  a  spook !.  . . . 
How  do  you  dare,  you  dirty  hussy,  ha  ?  What's  this  !  You 
want  to  push  me  alive  into  the  grave !  But  I'll  find  your 
lover  here,  and  take  you  to  the  mistress.  Then  we'll  see 
what  song  you'll  sing. 

Liza.  I  haven't  any  lover !  There's  no  use  in  your  look- 
ing. Search  the  whole  garden  if  you  want  to !  And  even 
if  I  had,  it's  none  of  your  business !  It's  shameful  for  you 
even  to  speak  of  it.  You  ought  not  even  to  know  about  it: 
you're  an  old  maid.     You  ought  to  be  ashamed  of  yourself! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Sing  on,  sing  on,  my  dear; 
you  sing  very  finely  on  the  wing;  but  you'll  perch  pretty 
soon  !  You're  not  going  to  roam  about  at  night  for  nothing. 
I  know  your  tricks.  I'll  show  you  all  up !  I'm  so  mad 
now,  that  even  if  you  bow  down  to  my  feet,  I'll  not  forgive 
you. 


SCENE  VI 


A  PROTfiGfiE  49 


Liza.  Just  wait !  I  see  myself  bowing  before  you  !  Don't 
count  on  it ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  No,  now  I'm  going  to  look 
around  every  bush. 

Liza.  Do  it ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna  looks  about  on  both  sides,  then 
approaches  the  pond. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Ha,  what's  this  .^  Do  tell,  what 
tricks  they're  up  to !  In  the  boat !  Hugging  each  other ! 
How  tender  that  is  !  Just  like  a  picture !  You  ought  to 
have  thought  to  take  a  guitar  along  and  sing  love-songs  ! .  .  .  . 
They're  kissing  each  other !  Very  good !  Delightful ! 
Again !  Excellent !  What  could  be  better  ?  Phew,  what 
an  abomination !  It's  disgusting  to  look  at !  Well,  my 
dears,  you  will  remember  me.  Now  I  have  nothing  to  say 
to  you.     To-morrow  I  shall !  [She  goes  out. 

Liza.  What  devil  brought  her  here?  You  can't  clear  up 
the  mess  now  ! 

Leonid  a7id  Nady^  reach  the  shore  and  disembark  from 
the  boat. 

SCENE    VI 

Liza,  Nadya,  and  Leonid 
Liza.  W^hat  have  you  done,  what  have  you  done ! .  .  .  . 


Nadya.  [Not  listening  to  her,  softly  to  Leonid]  You  will 
come  to-morrow  ? 
Leonid.  I  will. 

Liza.  What's  the  matter,  don't  you  hear  ? 
Nadya.  If  I  can't  come,  I'll  send  a  note  somehow  or  other. 
Leonid.  Good  ! 

Nadya.  Well,  good-by.  [They  kiss. 

Liza.  [Loudly]  Nadya ! 


50  A   PROTfiGfiE  act  iii 

Nadya.  [Goes  up  to  Liza.  Leonid  sits  down  upon  the 
bench]  What's  the  matter? 

Liza.  VasiHsa  Peregrinovna  saw  you  rowing  on  the  pond, 

Nadya.  Well,  deuce  take  her! 

Liza.  My  dear  girl,  don't  carry  your  head  too  high ! 

Leonid.  Nadya !  [Nadya  goes  to  him]  Oh,  Nadya,  what  a 
vile,  good-for-nothing  fellow  I  am ! 

Nadya.  What  do  you  mean  ? 

Leonid.  Little  Nadya  !  [He  lohispers  in  her  ear. 

Nadya.  [Shakes  her  head]  Oh,  my  precious  darling,  why 
did  that  come  into  your  head?  I'm  not  sorry  for  this,  but 
you  are.  How  kind  you  are !  Now,  good-by !  It's  high 
time.  I  shouldn't  leave  you,  but  I  can't  help  it;  I'm  not 
my  own  mistress. 

Leonid.  Good-by,  then ! 

Sloivli/,  as  if  unwillingly,  they  separate.     Nadya  returns, 
overtakes  Leonid  a7id  gazes  into  his  eyes. 

Nadya.  Do  you  love  me? 

Leonid.  I  do  love  you,  indeed  I  do ! 

[They  kiss  and  go  out  in  different  directions. 


IV 

Same  room  as  in  second  picture 

SCENE    II 

PoTAPYCH  is  leaning  against  the  door-jamh,  his  hand  to  his 
head.     Vasilisa  Peregrinovna  e7iters  quietly. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Result  of  yesterday  evening,  I 
suppose,  my  friend  ? 

PoTAPYCH.  Wha-a-t? 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Your  head  aches. 

PoTAPYCH.  Did  you  put  up  the  money.'* 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  You  haven't  any  money  for  any- 
thing else;   but  you  have  for  such  things. 

PoTAPYCH.  Well,  anyhow,  it  ain't  your  business. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Of  course,  Potapych,  you're  an 
old  man,  why  shouldn't  you  take  a  drink  once  in  a  while.'' 

Potapych.  Sure,  I  guess  I  work  for  it. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Just  so,  Potapych ! 

Potapych.  I'm  tired  of  being  lectured  by  you ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  I  wish  you  well,  Potapych. 

Potapych.  No  need  for  it !  [Silence]  But  you  keep  up- 
setting the  mistress  so !  If  you'd  only  put  in  a  word  for  us 
when  she's  in  a  good  humor;  but  you  just  look  for  the 
wrong  time,  in  order  to  complain  of  us. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  What  do  you  say,  Potapych.'* 
God  preserve  me ! 

Potapych.  What's    that !     No    matter    how    much    you 

'  The  whole  scene  in  a  whisper. 

51 


52  A   PROTfiGfiE  act  iv 

swear,  I  know  you  !     For  instance,  why  are  you  coming  to 
the  mistress  now  ? 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  To  wish  the  benefactress  good 
morning. 

PoTAPYCH.  You'd  better  not  come. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Why  so.'^ 

PoTAPYCH.  It  must  be  she  got  out  the  wrong  side  of  bed; 
she's  out  of  sorts.  [Vasilisa  Peregrinovna  rubs  her  hands 
with  pleasure]  Here  now,  I  see  that  you're  happy;  you're 
dying  for  some  deviltry  or  other.  Phew  !  Lord  forgive  us  ! 
What  a  disposition ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrino\':na.  You  are  saying  insulting  words 
to  me,  Potapych,  insulting  to  my  very  heart.  When  did  I 
ever  say  anything  about  you  to  the  mistress? 

Potapych.  If  not  about  me,  then  about  somebody  else. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  But  that's  my  business. 

Potapych.  Your  spite's  always  getting  in  its  work. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Not  spite,  not  spite,  my  friend ! 
You're  mistaken !  I  have  just  been  so  insulted  that  it's  im- 
possible to  live  in  this  world  after  it.  I  shall  die,  but  I  shall 
nut  forget. 

Madam  Ulanbekov  enters.     Potapych  goes  out. 


SCENE    II 

Madam  Ulanbekov  and  Vasilisa  Peregrinovna 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  [Kissing  both  of  Madam  Ulan- 
bekov's  hands]  You  have  risen  early,  benefactress.  You 
must  have  an  awful  lot  of  things  on  your  mind. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  [Sitting  dovni]  I  didn't  sleep  much. 
I  had  a  bad  dream.  " 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  What,   a  dream,   benefactress? 


SCENE  n  A   PROTEGEE  53 

The  dream  may  be  terrible,  but  God  is  merciful.  Not  the 
dream,  but  what  is  going  on  in  reaHty,  disturbs  you,  bene- 
factress.    I  see  that;    I've  seen  it  a  hjng  time. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Bah,  what  is  it  to  me  what's  going 
on.'' 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Why,  benefactress,  don't  we 
know  that  your  son,  dear  httle  soul !  is  struck  with  every 
creature  he  meets.'* 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  You  make  me  tired. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  I'm  so  sorry  for  you,  benefac- 
tress !  Don't  look  for  any  consolation  in  this  life !  You 
scatter  benefactions  upon  every  one;  but  how  do  they  repay 
you.''     The  world  is  full  of  lust. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Go  away  ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  [Weeping]  I  can't  keep  back 
my  tears  when  I  look  at  you  !  My  heart  bleeds  that  they 
don't  respect  you,  that  they  don't  respect  you  even  in  your 
own  house  !  In  your  honorable  house,  in  such  pious  premises 
as  these,  to  do  such  things ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  [Frouming]  You  silly  crow !  You 
want  to  croak  about  something  or  other.     Well,  croak  away  ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Benefactress,  I'm  afraid  it 
might  upset  you. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  You've  upset  me  already.     Talk ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  [Glances  about  in  all  directions 
and  sits  down  on  a  stool  at  the  feet  of  Madam  Ulanbekov] 
Yesterday,  benefactress,  I  was  ending  my  evening  prayer  to 
the  Heavenly  Creator,  and  went  out  to  stroll  in  the  garden, 
and  to  occupy  myself  for  the  night  with  pious  meditations. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Well ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  And  what  did  I  see  there,  bene- 
factress !  How  my  legs  held  me  up,  I  don't  know  !  That 
Liza  of  yours  was  running  through  the  bushes  with  a  de- 


54  A   PROTfiGfiE  act  iv 

praved  look;  it  must  he  slie  was  seeking  her  lovers.  Our 
master,  the  Httle  angel !  was  rowing  in  the  boat  on  the  pond, 
and  Nadya,  also  with  a  depraved  expression,  was  elinging  to 
him  with  her  arms  about  his  neck,  and  was  kissing  him.  And 
it  was  easy  to  see  that  lie,  because  of  his  ])urity,  was  trying 
to  tlirust  her  away;  but  she  kept  clasping  him  about  the 
neck,  kissing  and  tempting  him.  . 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Are  you  lying  ? 

Vasilisa  Pereghinovna.  You  may  quarter  me,  benefac- 
tress. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  It's  enough  if  there  is  one  grain  of 
truth  in  your  words. 

Vasilisa  Pekegrinovna.  It's  all  true,  benefactress. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Fiddlesticks !  not  all — it  can't  be ! 
You  always  make  up  more  than  half.  But  where  were  the 
servants? 

Vasilisa  Pereghinovna.  All  of  them,  benefactress,  were 
more  or  less  drunk.  No  sooner  had  you  gone  to  bed,  than 
they  all  went  to  the  fair  and  got  tipsy.  Gavrilovna,  Pota- 
pych,  all  were  drunk.     What  an  example  to  the  young ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  This  must  be  looked  into  thoroughly. 
Of  course,  I  shouldn't  have  expected  the  least  mischief  of 
Leonid.  Quiet  lads  like  him  !  Well,  if  he'd  been  a  soldier, 
it  would  be  pardonable;  but  as  it  is.  .  .  .  [She  muses. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  And  furthermore,  benefactress, 
so  far  Grisha  hasn't  come  back  from  the  fair. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  How's  that.^  He  didn't  sleep  at 
home  ? 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  He  did  not,  benefactress ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  You  lie,  you  lie,  you  lie !  I'll  drive 
you  off  the  place  ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  May  I  die  in  my  tracks ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  [Sinking  hack  in  her  chair]  You  want 


SCENE  III 


A   PROTfiGfiE  55 


to  kill  me.     [Raiding  herself  from,  the  chair]  Yoii  simply  want 
to  kill  me.     [She  rings.     Enter  Potapycii]  \Yhere"s  Grisha.'' 

PoTAPYCH.  Just  came,  ma'am. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Send  him  here !  [Potapych  goes  out] 
This  certainly  beats  all ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  You'll  not  find  anybody  more 
devoted  than  I,  benefactress;  only  I  am  unhappy  in  one  re- 
spect:   that  my  disposition  displeases  you. 

Enter  Grisha,  his  hair  tousled  and  dishevelled. 


SCENE    III 

The  same,  and  Grisha 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Where' ve  you  been.'' 

Grisha.  [Now  opens,  now  closes  his  eyes,  not  sure  of  his 
tongue,  and  unsteady  on  his  hgs]  At  the  fair,  ma'am. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Just  come  froi^  it  ?  [Grisha  is  silent] 
Why  don't  you  talk.''  [Silence]  Am  I  going  to  get  a  word  out 
of  you,  or  not.'* 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Answer  the  mistress. 

Grisha.  What's  that  to  you .'' 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Answer  me !  Where  have  you  been 
all  this  time.'* 

Grisha.  I've  done  wrong,  ma'am. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  I'm  not  asking  you  whether  you've 
done  wrong  or  not;    I'm  asking  you  where  you  were! 

Grisha.  [Looks  at  the  ceiling  with  a  vacant  stare]  Why, 
where  should  I  be  ?     The  idea  !     The  same  place  as  usual ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Well,  where's  that? 

Grisha.  I  just  informed  you  that  I  was  there  all  the 
time,  ma'am. 


56  A    PROTfiGfiE  ACT  IV 

IVIadam  Ulanbekov.  You'll  drive  inc  out  of  palicucf ! 
Where's  there? 

Grisiia.  But,  really,  ma'am !  Your  will  in  everytliing, 
ma'am.     What  did  I,  ma'am.  .  .  .      I've  done  wrong,  ma'am. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Good  Lord !  Wju're  still  drunk,  I 
guess . 

Grisha.  Not  a  hit,  ma'am. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Nonsense !     I  ean  see. 

Grisha.  But,  really,  ma'am  !  One  eaii  say  anything  ahout 
a  man. 

Madam  Ui^anbekov.  Bah,  you  disgraeeful  seamp !  He 
still  denies  it !  This  is  awful !  This  is  awful !  Now,  speak 
up,  where' ve  you  been  .^ 

Grisha.  Why,  really,  ma'am  !    I  just  informed  you,  ma'am. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Were  you  at  the  fair  all  night? 

Grisha.  I  just  informed  you  so,  ma'am. 

Madam  Ul.\nbekov.  How  did  you  dare,  when  I  let  you 
go  for  only  a  short  time? 

Grisha.  Well,  really,  ma'am  !  I  did  want  to  go  home,  but 
they  wouldn't  let  me,  ma'am. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Who  wouldn't  let  you  go? 

Grisha.  My  friends  wouldn't,  ma'am. 

IVIadam  Ulanbekov.  Who  are  these  friends  of  yours  ? 

Grisha.  Why,  really,  ma'am !     Government  office  clerks. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Great  heavens !  Clerks !  Do  you 
understand  what  kind  of  people  they  are? 

Grisha.  Who,  ma'am,  clerks?  Understand  wh.at  about 
them,  ma'am  ? 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  And  you  prowled  about  with  them 
all  night !  It  would  have  l)een  better  if  you  hadn't  told  me, 
nasty  scamp  that  you  are !  I  know  how  they  act !  They'll 
teach  you  all  sorts  of  things!  What  does  this  mean?  Be- 
gone !     And  don't  you  dare  show  yourself  before  my  eyes ! 


SCENE  iir 


A   PROTEGfiE  57 


Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Ask  forgiveness,  you  blockhead  ! 
Kiss  the  dear  lady's  hand  ! 

Grisha  waves  his  hand  impatiently  and  goes  out. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  What  an  affliction !  It'll  simply 
make  me  ill !  Already  I  feel  my  spasms  are  beginning.  What 
a  worthless  scamp !  He  went  out  just  as  if  he  had  no  re- 
sponsibilities !     And  without  a  sign  of  repentance ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Ah,  benefactress,  you  see  he's 
still  a  child;    he  did  it  just  out  of  stupidity. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  No,  he  needs  a  good .... 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  What  do  you  say,  benefactress  ? 
He's  still  a  regular  booby !  What  can  you  expect  of  him  ! 
He'll  get  wiser,  then  it  will  be  altogether  different. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  What  offends  me  most  is  ingrati- 
tude !  It  seems  to  me  he  ought  to  feel  what  I  am  doing  for 
him.     I'm  positively  sick.     Go  for  the  doctor ! 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Calm  yourself,  benefactress; 
as  if  that  rabble  were  worth  your  getting  upset  over ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Hand  me  the  smelling-salts. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  [Hands  her  them]  Snap  your 
fingers  at  them,  that's  all.     Now,  if  only  those  girls.  .  .  . 

Madam  Ul.\nbekov.  Oh,  here's  another  affliction !  Now 
I  certainly  can't  collect  my  thoughts;  I'm  completely  dis- 
tracted, and  now  she  begins  on  the  girls  !  I  shall  take  to 
my  bed  at  any  moment. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Lust,  benefactress,  is  beyond 
all  endurance. 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  No,  they  needn't  expect  any  mercy 
from  me.  As  it  is,  I  forgive  one,  then  another,  and  so  the 
whole  crowd  is  spoiled.  [She  rings;  enter  Potapych]  Call 
Nadezhda,  and  come  here  yourself !  [Potapych  goes  out] 
That's  what  it  is  to  be  a  woman.  If  I  were  a  man,  would 
they  dare  be  so  wilful  ? 


58  A   PROTfiGfiE  act  iv 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  They  don't  give  a  fig  for  you, 
benefactress,  not  a  fig.  They  aren't  a  httle  bit  afraid  of 
you ! 

Madam  Ul^nbekov.  They're  going  to  find  out  pretty 
(juitk  whether  I  amount  to  anything. 

Enter  Potapycii  and  Nadya.     Gavrilovna  and  Liza 
look  through  the  door. 


SCENE    IV 

The  same,  Potapych  and  Nadya 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Nadezhda !  VasiHsa  Peregrinovna 
says  she  saw  you  in  the  garden  last  night  with  the  master. 
Is  that  so?  [Nadya  is  silent]  You're  silent,  that  means  it's 
true.  Well,  now%  you  can  thank  yourself.  I'm  not  a  con- 
niver  at  loose  conduct,  and  I  won't  endure  it  in  my  house. 
I  can't  turn  you  out  as  a  vagabond,  that  would  weigh  upon 
my  conscience.  I  am  obliged  to  marry  you  off.  [To  Pota- 
pych] Send  to  town  and  tell  Negligentov  that  I  shall  marry 
Nadya  to  liim;  and  let  the  wedding  be  just  as  soon  as  pos- 
sible. [She  rises  from  her  chair  and  is  about  to  leave. 

Nadya.  [Falling  at  her  feet]  Whatever  you  wish,  only  not 
marriage  with  him ! 

Madam  Ul,.\nbekov.  Fiddlesticks !  What  I  have  once 
said  is  sacred.  And  what  do  you  mean  by  this  scene  ?  Can't 
you  see  that  I'm  not  well  ?  To  keep  on  plaguing  me  !  Pota- 
pych !  She  has  no  father;  you  be  a  father  to  her  instead; 
and  impress  upon  her  in  fatherly  fashion  the  baseness  of  her 
conduct,  and  the  fact  that  she  must  obey  my  commands. 

Potapych.  You  listen,  Nadezhda,  to  what  the  mistress 
commands !  Because  when  she  intrusts  you  to  me,  it  means 
that  I  must  show  my  authority  over  you.     If  you  command 


SCENE  IV 


A   PROTfiGfiE  59 


it,  mistress,  I  can  at  once,  in  your  presence,  give  her  some 
moral  instruction  with  my  own  hand  !  Here,  if  you  dare  to 
say  one  tiny  word  to  the  contrary,  I'll  drag  you  off  by  the 
hair,  no  matter  what  any  one  says. 

[He  raises  his  hand  threateningly. 

Nadya.  Oh  ! .  .  .  .  [She  crouches. 

Madam   Ulanbekov.  Don't   strike   her !     What   disgust- 


ing scenes 


PoTAPYCH.  But,  mistress  !  You  can't  get  results  by  talk- 
ing !  Besides,  if  I'm  her  father,  that's  the  regular  thing ! 
That's  the  law,  and  according  to  that,  since  she  is  rebel- 
ling against  you  now,  I  ought  to  give  you  that  satisfaction. 

Nadya.  [Weeping]  Mistress,  don't  ruin  me ! 

Madam  Ulanbekov.  Oh,  my  God !  You  don't  spare  me 
at  all.  Tears,  squabblings !  Send  for  the  doctor  at  once ! 
How  many  times  have  I  got  to  say  it.''  It's  your  own  fault, 
you've  nobody  to  blame  for  your  tears.  Potapych !  get  this 
business  over  with !  I  don't  like  to  repeat  the  same  thing 
ten  times  over. 

She  goes  out,  Gavrilovna  after  her.     Silence.     Gav- 
RiLOVNA  returns. 

Gavrilovna.  She's  gone  to  bed,  and  banged  the  door 
behind  her. 

Potapych.  [At  the  windoto]  Antoshka  !  Antoshka  !  Post 
boy !  Saddle  the  horse  and  ride  to  town  for  the  doctor. 
Oh,  you  !     Lord  ! 

Nadya.  [Rising  from  her  knees]  Don't  you  think  it's  a  sin 
for  you  to  abuse  me,  Potapych?  What  have  I  ever  done  to 
you  .'* 

Potapych.  What  do  I  care  ?  What  do  I  care  about  you  ? 
When  the  mistress  really  wants  something,  I  have  to  try  to 
please  her  in  every  way;   because  I  was  born  her  servant. 


GO  A    PROTfiGfiE  act  iv 

Nadya.  If  slie  had  commanded  you  to  kill  me,  would  you 
have  done  it? 

PoTAPY('H.  That's  not  my  aflFair,  I  can't  argue  about  that. 

Gavrilovna.  That's  enough,  Nadya,  don't  cry !  God 
doesn't  abandon  orphans. 

Nadya  falls  upon  Gavrilovna's  hnsom. 

Liza.  [To  Vasilisa  Peregrinovna]  Well,  is  your  heart 
content  now  ? 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Wait,  my  dear,  your  turn  will 
come. 

Leonid  enters. 

SCENE    V 

The  same  and  Leonid 

Leonid.  What's  this  ?     What  has  happened  ? 

Vasilisa  Peregrinov'na.  You  made  all  the  trouble  your- 
self, and  then  ask  what  lias  happened. 

Leonid.  What  trouble  did  I  make.^  What  are  you  con- 
tinually thinking  up  ? 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Now,  don't  pretend  !  The  whole 
truth  has  come  out.  You've  been  having  a  little  fun.  What 
of  it.'*     At  your  age,  why  shouldn't  you  have? 

Liza.  She's  reported  the  whole  thing  to  the  mistress.  The 
mistress  got  so  angry  that  it  was  awful !  And  now,  sir,  she 
is  going  to  marry  Nadya  to  that  government  clerk. 

Leonid.  Are  you  sure? 

Nadya.  The  tiling's  settled,  dearest  master !  I  have  to 
answer  for  last  evening's  sport. 

Leonid.  Is  mamma  very  angry  ? 

Gavrilovna.  No  one  dares  go  near  her. 

Leonid.  But  how  can  that  be?  Isn't  it  possible  to  talk 
her  over  somehow  or  other? 


SCENE  V  A   PROTEGEE  61 

Gavrilovna.  Just  go  and  try.  No,  she  won't  come  out 
of  her  room  now  for  five  days;  and  she  won't  let  any  one  at 
all  see  her  there. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Do  you  want  to  talk  your 
mamma  over.'* 

Leonid.  Yes. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Do  you  want  me  to  tell  you 
how  ? 

Leonid.  Please  be  so  kind,  Vasilisa  Peregrinovna. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Well,  permit  me.  Our  bene- 
factress is  very  much  hurt  at  Grisha,  because  he  didn't  spend 
the  night  at  home:  he  came  in  drunk,  and  didn't  even  ask 
forgiveness  nor  kiss  her  hand.  It  was  this  vexation  that 
made  her  sick.  And  then  this  Nadezhda  happened  to  come 
her  way  when  she  was  angry.  Now  our  benefactress  won't 
even  come  out  of  her  room,  and  won't  allow  any  one  to  go  to 
her,  so  long  as  that  stubborn  Grisha  doesn't  beg  forgiveness. 

Gavrilovna.  How  contrarily  everything  happened  !  Gri- 
sha will  keep  up  his  character,  too.  Although  he  is  a  block- 
head, he  has  some  sense.  Now  he'll  flop  down  on  the  hay 
and  he'll  lie  there  on  his  belly  for  four  days. 

PoTAPYCH.  Somebody  ought  to  take  Uncle  Gerasim's 
club  and  dress  him  down  from  top  to  toe. 

Vasilisa  Peregrinovna.  Now,  our  dear  master,  wouldn't 
you  like  to  go  present  your  compliments  to  him,  in  order 
that  he  might  hurry  up  and  ask  your  mamma's  forgiveness  ^ 

Leonid.  [Upon  reflection]  That  would  be  too  great  an 
honor  for  him.  But  see  here,  Gavrilovna,  is  mamma  actu- 
ally very  angry  .'* 

Gavrilovna.  So  angry,  sir,  that  it's  terrible ! 

Leonid.  Well,  what's  to  be  done  now ! 

Nadya.  Why  are  you  bothering?  You  see,  there's  noth- 
ing you  can  do:   better  leave  me!     Now  you'll  soon  go  away 


62  A   PROTfiGfiE  act  iv 

to  Petersburg;  you  will  l)e  happy:  why  should  you  think 
about  such  trifles,  or  disturb  yourself? 

Leonid.  Why,  j'ou  see,  I'm  sorry  for  j'ou ! 

Nadya.  Don't  be  sorry,  if  you  please !  I  ran  to  my  own 
destruction  of  mj'  own  free  will,  like  a  mad  girl,  without 
once  stopping  to  think. 

Leonid.  What  are  you  planning  to  do  now.'* 

Nadya.  That's  my  business. 

Leonid.  But,  you  see,  it's  going  to  be  very  hard  for  you, 

Nadya.  What  business  is  it  of  yours.''  It  will  be  all  the 
happier  for  you. 

Leonid.  But  why  do  you  talk  like  this? 

Nadya.  Because  you're  still  a  boy  ! .  .  .  .     Leave  me  ! 

Leonid.  But,  you  see,  he's  such  a  drunken,  vile  fellow. 

Nadya.  Oh,  my  God !  It  would  be  better  for  you  to  go 
off  somewhere:  out  of  my  sight. 

Leonid.  Yes,  really,  it  would  be  better  for  me  to  spend  a 
week  with  our  neighbors. 

Nadya.  For  God's  sake,  do ! 

Leonid.  But  Nadya,  if  it  should  be  awfully  hard  for  you 
to  live  with  your  husband,  what  then  ? 

Nadya.  [Weeping]  Oh,  leave  me  alone !  Be  good  enough 
to  leave  me  alone !  [Sobbing]  I  beg  only  one  thing  of  you : 
leave  me,  for  God's  sake !  [She  sobs. 

Gavrilovna  and  Liza.  [Motioning  with  their  hands]  Go 
away !     Go  away ! 

Leonid.  Why  do  you  drive  me  out?  I  guess  I'm  sorry 
enough  for  her !  I  keep  thinking  somehow  or  other,  that  it 
may  still  be  possible  to  helj)  her  in  some  way. 

Nadya.  [With  desperation]  I  don't  want  any  helpers  or 
defenders !  I  don't  want  them !  If  my  patience  fails,  that 
pond  of  ours  isn't  far  off ! 

Leonid.  [Timidly]  Well,    I'll    go   away   if   you    wish.... 


SCENE  V 


A   PROTfiGfiE  G3 


Only  what  is  she  saying  ?     You  folks,  look  after  her,  please  ! 
Good-by  !  [He  goes  to  the  door. 

Nadya.  [After  him  in  a  loud  voice]  Good-by ! 
Leonid  goes  out. 

Liza.  And  so  the  old  proverb  is  true:   What's  fun  for  the 
cat  is  tears  for  the  mouse. 


POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME 

A  COMEDY  IN  THREE  ACTS 


* 


CHARACTERS 

GoRDEY  KL4rpych  Tortsov,  a  rich  merchant. 

Pelageya  Egorovna,  his  wife. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  his  davghter. 

Lyubim  Karpych  Tortsov,  his  brother,  a  man  who  has  squan- 
dered his  property. 

Afrikan  Savvich  Korshunov,'  a  manufacturer. 

MiTYA,  ToRTSOv's  clcrk. 

Yasha  GtJSLiN,  nepheio  of  Tortsov. 

Grisha  Razlyulyayev,  a  young  merchant,  the  son  of  a  rich 
father. 

Anna  Ivanovna,  a  young  widow. 

}  friends  of  Lyubov  Tortsov. 
Liza       J 

Egorushka,  a  hoy,  distant  relative  of  Tortsov. 

Arina,  ?iurse  of  Lyubov  Gordeyevna. 

Guests,  Servants,  Mummers,  and  Others. 

The  action  takes  place  in  a  district  toion  in  the  hov^e  of  the 
merchant  Tortsov  during  the  Christmas  holidays. 

» Vulture 


POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME 
ACT   I 

A  small  office  room;  in  the  rear  loall  a  door ;  in  the  corner  on 
the  left  a.  bed,  on  the  right  a  cupboard.  In  the  left  wall  a 
vrindow,  and  beside  the  window  a  table.  Near  the  table  a 
chair;  near  the  right  wall  a  desk  and  a  wooden  stool.  Be- 
side the  bed  a  guitar;  on  the  table  and  desk  are  books  and 
papers. 

SCENE    I 

MiTYA  is  walking  back  and  forth  in  the  room.  Egorushka  is 
seated  on  the  stool  reading  "Bova  Korolevich." 

Egorushka.  [Reads]  "My  sovereign  father,  glorious  and 
brave  king,  Kiribit  Verzoulovich,  I  do  not  possess  the  cour- 
age to  marry  liim  now.  Because  when  I  was  young  I  was 
wooed  by  King  Gvidon." 

MiTYA.  Well,  Egorushka,  is  any  one  at  home? 

Egorushka.  [Putting  his  finger  on  the  place  where  he  is 
reading  in  order  not  to  make  a  mistake]  Nobody;  they've  all 
gone  driving.  There's  only  Gordey  Karpych  at  home. 
[Reads]  "Whereupon  Kiribit  Verzoulovich  said  to  his  daugh- 
ter"— [Again  marking  the  place] — only  he's  in  such  a  rage, 
it's  awful !  I  cleared  out — he  keeps  on  cursing.  [Reads] 
"Then  the  beaatiful  Militrisa  Kirbltyevna  called  her  servant 
Licharda  to  her." 

MiTYA.  With  whom  was  he  angry? 

Egorushka.  Witli  my  uncle,  with  Lyubim  Karpych.  On 
the  second  day  of  the  holidays  Uncle  Lyubim  Karpych  dined 

67 


68  POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

with  us;  at  dimuT  1k'  f^ot  drunk  and  began  to  play  the  fool; 
it  was  awfully  funny.  I  always  get  the  giggles.  I  couldn't 
stand  it,  and  then  I  burst  out  laughing,  and  they  were  all 
looking  at  me.  Uncle  Gordey  Karpych  took  it  as  a  great 
insult  to  himself  and  very  bad  manners,  and  he  was  furious 
with  him  and  turned  him  out.  Uncle  Lyubim  Karpych 
made  a  great  row,  and  out  of  revenge  went  and  stood  with 
the  beggars  by  the  church  door.  Uncle  Gordey  Karpych 
said:  "He  has  put  me  to  shame,"  he  said,  "in  the  eyes  of 
the  whole  town."  And  now  he  gets  angry  with  everybody 
who  comes  near  him,  no  matter  who  they  are.  [Reads]  "With 
the  intention  of  advancing  toward  our  town." 

MiTYA.  [Looking  out  of  the  tvindow]  Here  they  come,  I 
think.  Yes,  it's  so.  Pelageya  Egorovna,  Lyubov  Gorde- 
yevna,  and  guests  with  them. 

Egorushka.  [Concealing  his  story  in  his  pocket]  I'll  run 
up-stairs.  [Goes  out. 


SCENE    II 

MiTYA  alone 

MiTYA.  Oh,  Lord,  what  misery  !  Everybody  in  the  streets 
is  having  a  holiday,  and  everybody  in  the  houses  too,  and 
you  have  to  sit  between  four  walls !  I  am  a  stranger  to 
all,  no  relations,  no  friends ! — And  then  besides ! — O  well ! 
I'd  better  get  to  work;  perhaps  this  wretchedness  will  pass 
off.       [Seats  himself  at  the  desk  and  muses,  then  begins  to  sing. 

"Her  beauty  I  cannot  describe! 
Dark  eyebrows,  with  languishing  eyes." 

Yes,  with  languishing  eyes.     And  yesterday  when  she  came 
from  mass,  in  her  sable  coat,  and  her  little  handkerchief  on 


SCENE  m        POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  69 

her  head,  like  this — ah ! — I  really  think  such  beauty  was 
never  seen  before  !  [Muses,  then  sings. 

"Where,  O  where  was  this  beauty  born!" 

My  work  all  goes  out  of  my  head  !  I'm  always  thinking  of 
her !  My  heart  is  tormented  with  sorrow.  O  misery  most 
miserable ! 

Covers  his  face  with  his  hands  and  sits  silent.     Enter 

Pelageya  Egorovna,  dressed  in  winter  clothes;  she 

stops  in  the  doorway. 


SCENE    III 

MiTYA  and  Pelageya  Egorovna 

Pelageya  Egorovna,  Mitya,  Mitya  dear! 

MiTYA.  What  do  you  want  ? 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Come  up  to  us  later  on  in  the  eve- 
ning, my  dear,  and  play  with  the  girls.  We're  going  to  sing 
songs. 

Mitya.  Thank  you  exceedingly,  I  shall  make  it  my  first 
duty. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  W^hy  are  you  always  sitting  alone 
in  the  office  ?  It's  not  very  cheerful !  You'll  come,  won't 
you?     Gordey  Karpych  won't  be  at  home. 

Mitya.  Good,  I  shall  come  without  fail. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  He's  going  off  again,  j'ou  see;  he's 
going  off  there  to  that  friend  of  his — what's  his  name? 

Mitya.  To  Afrikan  Savvich  ? 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Yes,  yes !  He's  quite  gone  on 
him  !     Lord  forgive  him  ! 

Mitya!  Take  a  seat,  Pelageya  Egorovna.     [Fetches  a  chair. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Oh,  I  have  no  time.     Well,  yes,  I'll 


70  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

sit  down  a  hit.  [Sits  doini]  Now  just  tliiuk,  what  a  misfor- 
tune !  Really,  they've  hccome  such  friends  that  it  beats 
everything !  Yes,  that's  what  it's  come  to !  And  why? 
What's  the  use  of  it  all  ?  Tell  me  that,  pray.  Isn't  Afrikan 
Savvich  a  coarse,  drunken  fellow?     Isn't  he? 

MiTYA.  Perhaps  Gordey  Karpych  has  some  business  with 
Afrikan  Savvich. 

Pelageya  Egoro\^a.  What  sort  of  business !  He  has 
no  business  at  all.  You  see  Afrikan  Savvich  is  always  drink- 
ing with  that  Englishman.  He  has  an  Englishman  as  di- 
rector of  his  factory,  and  they  drink  together !  But  he's  no 
fit  company  for  my  husband.  But  can  jou  reason  with 
him?  Just  think  how  proud  he  is  !  He  says  to  me:  "There 
isn't  a  soul  here  to  speak  to;  all,"  he  says,  "are  rabble,  all, 
you  see,  are  just  so  many  peasants,  and  they  live  like  peas- 
ants. But  that  man,  you  see,  is  from  Moscow — lives  mostly 
in  Moscow — and  he's  rich."  And  whatever  has  happened 
to  him  ?  Well,  you  see,  it  was  all  of  a  sudden,  my  dear  boy, 
all  of  a  sudden !  He  used  to  have  so  much  sense.  Well, 
we  lived,  of  course  not  luxuriously,  but  all  the  same  pretty 
fairly  decently;  and  then  last  year  he  went  for  a  trip,  and  he 
caught  it  from  some  one.  He  caught  it,  he  caught  it,  they 
have  told  me  so — caught  all  these  tricks.  Now  he  doesn't 
care  for  any  of  our  Russian  ways.  He  keeps  harping  on  this : 
"I  want  to  be  up  to  date,  I  want  to  be  in  the  fashion.  Yes, 
yes  !  Put  on  a  cap,"  he  says !  What  an  idea  to  get !  Am 
I  going  to  try  to  charm  any  one  in  my  old  age  and  make 
myself  look  lovely?  Bah!  You  just  try  to  do  anything 
with  him.  He  never  drank  before — really  he  didn't — but 
now  he  drinks  with  this  Afrikan.  It  must  be  that  drink  has 
turned  his  brain  [points  to  her  head]  and  muddled  him .... 
[Silence]  I  think  now  that  the  devil  has  got  hold  of  him  ! 
Why  can't  he  have  some  sense  !     If  he  were  a  young  fellow  ! 


SCENE  IV        POVERTY  IS  NO   CRIME  71 

For  a  3'oung  fellow  to  dress  up  and  all  that  is  all  right;  hut 
you  see  he's  nearly  sixty,  my  dear,  nearly  sixty !  Really  ! 
"Your  fashionable  up-to-date  things,"  says  I,  "change 
every  day;  our  Russian  things  have  lived  from  time  im- 
memorial !  The  old  folks  weren't  any  stupider  than  we." 
But  can  you  reason  with  him,  my  dear,  with  his  violent 
character  ? 

MiTYA.  What  is  there  to  say  ?     He's  a  harsh  man. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Lyubov  is  just  at  the  right  age 
now;  we  ought  to  be  settling  her,  but  he  keei)s  dinning  it 
in:  "There's  no  one  her  equal,  no!  no!"  But  there  is! 
But  he  says  there  isn't.  How  hard  all  this  is  for  a  mother's 
heart. 

MiTYA.  Perhaps  Gordey  Karpych  wishes  to  marry  Lyubov 
Gordeyevna  in  Moscow. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Who  knows  what  he  has  in  his 
mind  ?  He  looks  like  a  wild  beast,  and  never  says  a  word, 
as  if  I  were  not  a  mother.  Yes,  truly,  I  never  say  anything 
to  him;  I  don't  dare;  all  you  can  do  is  to  speak  with  some 
outsider  about  your  grief,  and  weep,  and  relieve  your  heart; 
that's  all.  [Rises]  You'll  come,  Mitya? 

MiTYA.  I'll  come,  ma'am. 
GusLiN  comes  in. 


SCENE    IV 

The  same  and  Guslin 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Here's  another  fine  lad !  Come 
up-stairs  to  us,  Yasha,  and  sing  songs  with  the  girls;  you're 
good  at  that;  and  bring  along  your  guitar. 

Guslin.  Thank  you,  ma'am:  I  don't  think  of  that  as 
work;  I  must  say  it's  a  pleasure. 


72  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

Pel.\geya  Egorovxa.  Well,  gou(l-l)y  !     I'm  going  to  take 
a  nap  for  half  an  hour. 

GusLiN  and  MiTYA.  Good-by, 

Pelageya  J^gorovxa  goes  out;  Mitya  .teats  himself 
dejectedly  at  the  table;  Guslin  seats  himself  on  the 
bed  and  takes  vp  the  yuitar. 


SCENE    V 

Mitya  and  Yasha  Guslin 

Guslin.  What  a  crowd  there  was  at  the  fair !  Your  peo- 
ple were  there.     Why  weren't  you  ? 

Mitya.  Because  I  felt  so  awfully  miserable. 

Guslin.  What's  the  matter?  What  are  you  unhappy 
about .' 

Mitya.  How  can  I  help  being  unhappy  ?  Thoughts  like 
these  keep  coming  into  my  head:  what  sort  of  man  am  I  in 
the  world  ^  My  mother  is  old  and  poor  now,  and  I  must 
keep  her — and  how  ?  My  salary  is  small ;  I  get  nothing  but 
abuse  and  insults  from  Gordey  Karpych;  he  kee^s  reproach- 
ing me  with  my  poverty,  as  if  I  were  to  blame — and  he  doesn't 
increase  my  salary.  I'd  look  for  another  place,  but  where 
can  one  find  one  without  friends.^  And,  yes,  I  will  confess 
to  you  that  I  won't  go  to  another  place. 

Guslin.  Why  won't  you  go  ?  There  at  the  Razlyulyayevs' 
it's  very  nice — the  people  are  rich  and  kind. 

Mitya.  No,  Yasha,  that  doesn't  suit  me !  I'll  bear  any- 
thing from  Gordey  Karpych,  I'll  stand  poverty,  but  I  won't 
go  away.     That's  my  destiny  ! 

Guslin.  Why  so? 

Mitya.  [Rises]  Well,    I    have    a    reason    for    this.     It    is. 


SCENE  V         POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  73 

Yasha,  because  I  have  another  sorrow — hut  nobody  knows 
about  it.     I  haven't  spoken  to  any  one  about  my  sorrow. 

GusLiN.  Tell  me  about  it. 

MiTYA.  [Waving  his  hand]  What  for? 

GusLiN.  Yes,  tell  me;  don't  put  on  airs! 

MiTYA.  Whether  I  tell  you  or  not,  you  can't  help  me ! 

GusLiN.  How  do  you  know? 

MiTYA.  [Walking  toward  Guslin]  Nobody  can  help  me 
— I  am  a  lost  man !  I've  fallen  wildly  in  love  with  Lyubov 
Gordeyevna. 

Guslin.  What's  the  matter  with  you,  Mitya?  Whatever 
do  you  mean  ? 

MiTYA.  Well,  anyhow,  it's  a  fact. 

Guslin.  You'd  better  put  it  out  of  your  head,  Mitya. 
Nothing  can  ever  come  of  that,  so  there's  no  use  thinking 
about  it. 

Mitya,  Though  I  know  all  this,  one  cannot  control  one's 
heart.  "To  love  is  most  easy,  one  cannot  forget."  [He  speaks 
with  violent  gestures]  "I  love  the  beautiful  girl  more  than 
family,  more  than  race;  but  evil  people  forbid  me,  and  they 
bid  me  cease." 

Guslin.  Yes,  indeed;  but  you  must  stop  it!  Now  Anna 
Ivanovna  is  my  equal;  she  has  no  money,  and  I  haven't  a 
kopek — and  even  so  uncle  forbids  me  to  marry.  It's  no  use 
for  you  to  think  of  doing  so.  You'll  get  it  into  your  head  and 
then  it'll  be  still  harder  for  you. 

Mitya.  [Declaiming]  "What  of  all  things  is  most  cruel? 
The  most  cruel  thing  is  love."  [Walking  about  the  room.] 
Yasha,  have  you  read  Koltsov  ? 

Guslin.  Yes,  why? 

Mitya.  How  he  describes  all  these  feelings ! 

Guslin.  He  does  describe  them  exactly. 


74  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

MiTYA.  Exactly,   to  perfection.  [JValking  about  the  room] 
Yasha ! 

GusLiN.  What? 

MiTYA.  I  myself  have  composed  a  song. 

GUSLIN.    You  ? 

MiTYA.  Yes. 

GusLiN.  Let's  make  up  a  tune  for  it,  and  we'll  sing  it. 
MiTYA.  Good  !     Here,  take  this   [gives  him  a  paper]  and 
I'll  write  a  little— I  have  some  work:    most  likely  Gordey 
Karpych  will  be  asking  me  about  it.  [Sits  and  vrrites. 

GusLiN  takes  the  guitar  and  begins  to  pick  out  a  tune. 
Razlyulyayev  comes  in  with  an  accordion. 


SCENE    VI 

The  same  and  Razlyulyayev 

Razlyulyayev.  Hello,  boys! 

[Plays  on  the  accordion  and  begins  to  dance. 

GusLiN.  What  a  fool !  What  did  you  buy  that  accordion 
for? 

Razlyulyayev.  Why,  I  bought  it  to  play  on,  of  course 
— this  way.  [Plays. 

GusLiN.  Well,  that's  fine  music,  I  must  say !  Stop,  I  tell 
you! 

Razlyulyayev.  What !  Do  you  think  I'll  stop  ?  I'll 
stop  when  I  want  to. — What  airs !  Haven't  I  got  any 
money  ?  [Slapping  his  pocket]  It  chinks !  If  we  go  on  a 
spree — then  it's  some  spree  ! 

"One  mountain  is  high, 
And  another  is  low; 
One  darling  is  far. 
And  another  is  near." 


SCENE  VI        POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  75 

Mitya !  [Strikes  Mitya  on  the  shoulder]  Mitya,  why  are  you 
sitting  still  ? 

Mitya.  I  have  some  work  to  do.  [Continues  to  work. 

Razlyulyayev,  Mitya!  Say,  Mitya,  I'm  on  a  spree, 
my  boy!  Really,  I  am.  Oh,  come  on!  [Sings,  "One  moun- 
tain is  high,"  etc.]  Mitya !  Say,  Mitya,  I'm  going  on  a 
spree  for  the  whole  holiday  season — then  I'll  set  to  work, 
upon  my  word  I  will !  Haven't  I  got  any  money .''  There 
it  is  !     And  I'm  not  drunk. — Oh,  no,  such  a  spree  ! — so  jolly  ! 

Mitya.  Well,  go  on  a  spree  as  much  as  you  like. 

Razlyulyayev.  And  after  the  holidays  I  shall  marry ! — 
Upon  my  word  I  shall  marry !     I'll  get  a  rich  girl. 

GusLiN.  Now,  then,  listen;  how  does  this  sound.'* 

Razlyulyayev.  Sing  it,  sing  it !     I'll  hsten. 

GusLiN.  [Sings] 

"Is  naught  so  hard  and  evil 
As  to  be  fatherless; 
Than  slavery  more  grievous 
And  sharper  than  distress. 

All  in  the  world  make  holiday. 
But  lonely  you  must  pine. 
Your  mind  is  wild  and  drunken. 
But  it  came  not  from  the  wine. 

Youth  shall  not  do  your  pleasure, 
Beauty  no  healing  bear. 
Your  sweetheart  does  not  comb  your  locks. 
But  your  harsh  stepdame.  Care." 

During  all  this  time  Razlyulyayev  stands  as  if  rooted 
to  the  ground,  and  listens   with  emotion;    when  the 
song  is  finished  all  are  silent. 
Razlyulyayev.  Good!     Very    good!     It's    awfully    sad; 


76  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

it  takes  hold  of  one's  heart.  [Sighs]  Ah,  Yasha !  play  some- 
thing cheerful;  that's  enough  of  this  stuff — to-day's  a  holi- 
day. [Sings. 

"Who  does  not  love  a  hussar! 
Life  without  love  would  be  sad  !" 

Play  the  tune,  Yasha. 

GusuN  plays  the  tunc. 

MiTYA.  That's  enough  of  your  fooling.     Come,  now,  let's 
sit  down  in  a  circle  and  sing  in  a  low  tone. 

Razlyulyayev.  All  right.  [They  sit  down. 

GusuN.  [Begins  to  sing;   Mitya  and  Razlyulyayev  join 
in] 

"Now  my  young,  my  young  lads, 
You  my  friends.  ..." 

Enter  Gordey  Karpych;  all  stand  up  and  stop  singing. 


SCENE    VII 

The  same  and  Gordey  Karpych 

Gordey  Karpych.  What's  all  this  screeching !  Bawling 
like  so  many  peasants!  [To  Mitya]  And  you  here!  You're 
not  living  here  in  a  peasant's  hut !  What  a  dram-shop ! 
See  that  this  sort  of  thing  doesn't  go  on  in  the  future !  [Goes 
to  the  table  and  inspects  the  papers]  Why  are  these  papers  all 
scattered  about.'* 

Mitya.  I  was  looking  over  the  accounts,  sir. 

Gordey  Karpych.  [Takes  the  book  by  Koltsov,  and  the  copy- 
hook  with  verses]  And  this,  too,  what's  this  rubbish.-* 

Mitya.  I  was  copying  these  poems  of  Koltsov's  to  pass 
the  time  away,  since  it's  a  holiday. 


SCENE  VII      POVERTY  IS  NO  CRIME  77 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  You  are  sentimental  for  a  poor  lad  ! 

MiTYA.  I  just  study  for  my  own  education,  in  order  to 
understand  things. 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Education !  Do  you  know  what  edu- 
cation is .'' — And  yet  you  keep  on  talking  !  You  ought  to  get 
yourself  a  new  coat !  For  when  you  come  up-stairs  to  us 
and  there  are  guests,  it's  a  disgrace !  What  do  you  do  with 
your  money .'' 

Mitya.  I  send  it  to  my  mother  because  she  is  old  and  has 
nowhere  to  get  any. 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Send  it  to  your  mother !  You  ought 
to  educate  yourself  first;  God  knows  what  your  mother 
needs!  She  wasn't  brought  up  in  luxury;  most  likely  she 
used  to  look  after  the  cows  herself. 

Mitya.  It's  better  that  I  should  suffer  than  that  my 
mother  should  be  in  any  want  at  all. 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  This  is  simply  disgusting !  If  j^ou 
don't  know  yourself  how  to  observe  decency,  then  sit  in  your 
hovel !  If  you  haven't  anything  to  wear,  then  don't  have 
any  fancies !  You  write  verses,  you  wish  to  educate  your- 
self— and  you  go  about  looking  like  a  factory  hand !  Does 
education  consist  in  this,  in  singing  idiotic  songs  .f*  You 
idiot !  [  Through  his  teeth  and  looking  askance  at  Mitya]  Fool ! 
[Is  silent]  Don't  you  dare  to  show  yourself  in  that  suit  up- 
stairs. Listen,  I  tell  you!  [To  Razlyulyayev]  And  you 
too !  Your  father,  to  all  appearances,  rakes  up  money  with 
a  shovel,  and  you  go  about  in  tliis  Russian  smock. 

Razlyulyayev.  What  do  you  say!  It's  new — French 
goods — I  ordered  it  from  Moscow — from  an  acquaintance — ■ 
twenty  rubles  a  yard !  Do  you  think  I  ought  to  go  about  in 
a  bob-tailed  coat,  like  Franz  Fedorych  at  the  apothecary's ! 
Why,  they  all  tease  him  there  ! — the  deuce  of  a  coat !  What's 
the  use  of  making  people  laugh ! 


78  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Much  you  know !  It's  hopeless  to 
expect  anything  of  you  !  You  yourself  are  an  idiot,  and  your 
father  hasn't  nuieh  more  sense — he  always  goes  about  in 
dirty  old  clothes.  You  live  like  ignorant  fools,  and  like  fools 
you  will  die. 

Razlyulyayev.  That's  enough ! 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Wliat.'* 

Razlyulyayev.  That's  enough,  I  say ! 

Gordey  Karpych.  Clown !  You  don't  even  know  how 
to  talk  straight !  It's  simply  waste  of  words  to  speak  to 
you — ^like  shooting  peas  against  a  wall — to  waste  words  on 
such  as  you,  fools  !  [Goes  out. 


SCENE    VIII 

The  same  without  Tortsov 

Razlyulyayev.  Just  look  !  How  savage !  What  a  rage 
he's  in !     Oh,  we're  awfully  scared  of  you — you  bet  we  are ! 

Mitya.  [To  Guslin]  There,  that's  the  sort  of  life  I  lead! 
That's  the  sort  of  thing  I  have  to  put  up  with ! 

Razlyulyayev.  It'll  drive  you  to  drink — upon  my  word, 
it'll  drive  you  to  drink!  But  you'd  better  stop  thinking 
about  it.  [Sings. 

"One  mountain  is  high, 
And  another  is  low; 
One  darling  is  far. 
And  another  is  near." 

Enter  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  Anna  Ivanovna,  Ma- 
SHA,  and  Liza. 


SCENE  IX        POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  79 


SCENE    IX 

The    same    and    Lyubov    Gordeyevna,    Anna    Ivanovna, 
Masha,  a7id  Liza. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Peace,  honest  company  ! 

Razlyulyayev.  I  welcome  you  to  our  shanty. 

MiTYA.  Our  respects  !  Please  come  in  !  What  good  wind 
brings  you  here? 

Anna  Ivanovna.  No  wind — we  just  took  it  into  our  heads 
and  came.  Gordey  Karpych  has  gone  out,  and  Pelageya 
Egoravna  has  gone  to  he  down,  so  now  we  are  free !  Be  as 
jolly  as  you  please  ! 

MiTYA.  I  humbly  beg  you  to  sit  down. 

They  sit  down;   Mitya  seats  himself  opposite  Lyubov 
Gordeyevna;  Razlyulyayev  walks  about. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  It  grew  dull  sitting  silent  cracking  nuts. 
"Come  on,  girls,"  said  I,  "and  see  the  boys,"  and  that  suited 
the  girls. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  What  stories  you  do  make  up ! 
We  never  thought  of  coming  here — that  was  your  idea. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Much  you  didn't !  You  were  the  first ! 
Everybody  knows,  if  a  person  wants  a  thing,  then  he  tliinks 
about  it;    the  boys  of  the  girls,  and  the  girls  of  the  boys. 

Razlyulyayev.  Ha,  ha,  ha !  Anna  Ivanovna,  you  have 
said  it  exactly. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Not  a  bit  of  it ! 

IVIasha.  [To  Liza]  Oh,  how  embarrassing! 

Liza.  Anna  Ivanovna,  you  are  just  saying  what  isn't 
true. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Oh,  you  modest  thing  !  I'd  like  to  say  a 
word — but  it  wouldn't  be  nice  before  the  boys ! — I've  been 
a  girl  myself.     I  know  all  about  it. 


80  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  There  are  girls  and  girls ! 

]\Iasiia.  Oil,  how  embarrassing! 

Liza.  What  you  say  sounds  very  strange  to  us,  and,  I 
must  say,  it's  disconcerting. 

Razlyulyayev.  Ha,  ha,  ha ! 

Anna  Ivanovna.  What  were  we  talking  about  just  now 
up-stairs  ?  Do  you  want  me  to  tell  ?  Shall  I  tell  them  ? 
Well,  have  you  calmed  down  now  .'* 

Razlyulyayev.  Ha,  ha,  ha ! 

Anna  Ivanovna.  What  are  you  opening  your  mouth  for? 
It  wasn't  about  you — don't  you  worry. 

Razlyulyayev.  Even  if  it  wasn't  about  me,  still  it  may 
be  there  is  some  one  who  tliinks  about  me.  I  know  what  I 
know  !  [Dayices  to  a  tune. 

"Who  does  not  love  a  hussar  ! 
Life  without  love  would  be  sad  !" 

Anna  Ivanovna.  [Walking  towards  Guslin]  Well,  guitar 
player,  when  will  you  marry  me.'* 

Guslin.  [Playing  on  the  guitar]  When  I  can  get  permission 
from  Gordey  Karpych.  What's  the  use  of  hurrying !  It 
isn't  raining  on  us !  [Nods  his  head]  Come  along  here,  Anna 
Ivanovna;   I've  got  something  to  say  to  you. 

She  goes  to  him,  and  sits  near  him;  he  whispers  in  her 
ear,    looking    towards    Lyubov    Gordeyevna    and 

MiTYA. 

Anna  Ivanovna.     What  do  you  say  ! — Really  ? 

Guslin.  It's  really  true. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Well,  then,  all  right;   keep  quiet ! 

[  They  talk  in  a  whisper. 
Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  You,  Mitya,  will  you  come  to  us 
later  on  in  the  evening  ? 
MiTYA.   I  will. 


SCENE  IX        POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  81 

Razlyulyayev.  And  I'm  coming;  I'm  good  at  dancing. 
[Stands  with  arms  akimbo]  Girls !  do  fall  in  love  with  me,  one 
of  you ! 

Masha.  You  ought  to  be  ashamed  of  yourself !  What's 
that  you're  saying  ? 

Razlyulyayev.  Why  such  airs !  I  sa3%  fall  in  love  with 
me,  somebody — yes — for  my  simplicity. 

Liza.  People  don't  talk  like  that  to  girls.  You  ought  to 
wait  till  they  do  fall  in  love  with  you. 

Razlyulyayev.  Yes,  much  I'll  get  from  you  by  waiting  1 

[Dances. 
"Who  does  not  love  a  hussar!" 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Looking  at  Mitya]  It  may  be 
somebody  loves  somebody  and  won't  tell !  He  must  guess 
himself. 

Liza.  How  can  any  girl  in  the  world  say  that ! 

Masha.  I  know  it ! 

Anna  Ivanovna.  [Goes  up  to  them  and  looks  now  at  Lyubov 
Gordeyevna  and  noio  at  Mitya  and  sings: 

"Already  it  is  seen 
If  somebody  loves  somebody — 
Opposite  the  beloved  one  she  seats  herself 
Heavily  sighing." 

Mitya.  Who  does  that  apply  to  ? 
Anna  Ivanovna.  We  know  to  whom. 
Razlyulyayev.  Stay,  girls,  I'll  sing  you  a  song. 
Anna  Ivanovna.  Sing,  sing ! 
Razlyulyayev.  [Sings  slowly] 

"A  bear  was  flying  through  the  sky." 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Don't  you  know  anything  worse  than 
that! 


82  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

Liza.  We  might  think  you  were  making  fim  of  us. 
Razlyulyayev.  If   tliis   isn't  good   enough   I'll   sing  you 
another,  for  I'm  a  jolly  fellow.  [Sings. 

"Beat!   Beat!  upon  the  board. 
Moscow !  Moscow  !  that's  the  word. 
Moscow's  got  it  in  his  head 
That  Kolomna  he  will  wed. 
Tula  lauglis  with  all  his  heart. 
But  with  the  dowry  will  not  part. 
Buckwheat  is  tuppence.     It's  twenty  for  oats. 
Millet  is  sixpence  and  barley  three  groats. 

[Tur7is  towards  the  girls. 
If  only  oats  would  but  come  down  ! 
It's  costly  carting  'em  to  town." 

See  !     What  weather  ! 

Masha.  This  doesn't  concern  us. 

Liza.  We  don't  trade  in  flour. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  What  are  you  interrupting  for !  Just 
guess  this  riddle.  What's  this:  round — ^but  not  a  girl;  with 
a  tail — but  not  a  mouse.''  * 

Razlyulyayev.  That's  a  hard  one ! 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Indeed  it  is ! — ^You  just  think  it  over ! 
Now,  girls,  come  along!  [The  girls  rise  and  get  ready  to  go] 
Come  along,  boys ! 

GusLiN  and  Razlyulyayev  get  ready. 

MiTYA.  But  I'll  come  later.  I'll  put  things  to  rights  here 
first. 

Anna  Ivanovna,  [Sings  while  they  are  getting  ready] 

"Our  maids  last  night, 
Our  pretties  last  night, 

1 A  turnip. 


SCENE  X         POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  83 

They  brewed  us  a  brew  of  the  beer  last  night. 

And  there  came  to  our  maids, 

And  there  came  to  our  pretties 

A  guest,  a  guest  whom  they  didn't  invite." 

Anna  Ivanovna  lets  them  all  pass  through  the  door, 
except  Lyubov  Gordeyevna;  she  shuts  the  door  and 
does  not  allow  her  to  pass. 

SCENE    X 
MiTYA  and  Lyubov  Gordeyevna 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [At  the  door]  Stop,  don't  be  silly ! 
[Through  the  door  the  girls  are  heard  laughing]  They  won't 
let  me  out !  Oh,  what  girls !  [Walks  away  from  the  door] 
They're  always  up  to  something. 

MiTYA.  [Hands  her  a  chair]  Be  seated,  Lyubov  Gorde- 
yevna, and  talk  to  me  for  just  a  moment.  I'm  very  glad  to 
see  you  in  my  room. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Why  are  you  glad  ?  I  don't  under- 
stand. 

MiTYA.  Oh,  why ! — It  is  very  pleasant  for  me  to  see  on 
your  side  such  consideration;  it  is  above  my  deserts  to  re- 
ceive it  from  you.  Tliis  is  the  second  time  I  have  had  the 
good  fortune 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  There's  nothing  in  that!  I  came 
here,  sat  awliile,  and  went  away  again.  That  means  nothing. 
Maybe  I'll  go  away  again  at  once. 

MiTYA.  Oh,  no  !  Don't  go  ! — Why  should  you  !  [Takes  the 
paper  out  of  his  pocket]  Permit  me  to  present  to  you  my 
work,  the  best  I  can  do — from  my  heart. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  What  is  this? 

MiTYA.  I  made  these  verses  just  for  you. 


84  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Trying  to  hide  her  joy]  Still,  it 
may  be  just  some  sort  of  foolishness — not  worth  reading. 

MiTYA.  That  I  cannot  judge,  because  I  wrote  it  myself, 
and  without  studying  besides. 
Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Read  it. 
MiTYA.  Directly. 

Seats  himself  at  the  table,  and  takes  the  paper:  Lyubov 
GoEDEYEVNA  approaches  very  near  to  him. 

"In  the  meadow  no  grasses  wither. 
And  never  a  flower  doth  fade; 
However  a  fair  lad  fadeth 
That  once  was  a  lusty  blade. 

He  loved  a  handsome  damsel; 
For  that  his  grief  is  great. 
And  heavy  his  misfortune. 
For  she  came  of  high  estate. 

The  lad's  heart  is  breaking. 
But  vain  his  grief  must  be. 
Because  he  loved  a  damsel 
Above  his  own  degree. 

When  all  the  night  is  darkened 
The  sun  may  not  appear; 
And  so  the  pretty  maiden. 
She  may  not  be  his  dear." 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Sitting  and  reflecting  for  some 
time]  Give  it  here.  [Takes  the  paper  and  hides  it,  then  rises] 
Now  I  will  write  something  for  you. 

MiTYA.  You! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Only  I  don't  know  how  to  do  it 
in  verse,  but — just  plain  Russian. 


SCENE XI        POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  85 

MiTYA.  I  shall  regard  such  a  kindness  from  you  as  a  great 
happiness  to  myself.  [Gives  her  paper  and  pen]  Here  they  are. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  It's  a  great  pity  that  I  write  so 
abominably.  [She  writes;  Mitya  tries  to  look]  Only  don't 
you  look,  or  I'll  stop  writing  and  tear  it  up. 

Mitya.  I  won't  look.  But  kindly  condescend  to  permit 
me  to  reply,  in  so  far  as  I  am  able,  and  to  write  some  verses 
for  you  on  a  second  occasion. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Laying  down  the  pen]  Write  if  you 
wish — only  I've  inked  all  my  fingers;  if  I'd  only  known,  I'd 
better  not  have  written. 

Mitya.  May  I  have  it? 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Well,  take  it;  only  don't  dare  to 
read  it  while  I'm  here,  but  after,  when  I've  gone. 

Folds  together  the  paper  and  gives  it  to  him;  he  conceals 
it  in  his  pocket. 

Mitya.  It  shall  be  as  you  wish. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Rises]  Will  you  come  up-stairs  to 
us.'' 

Mitya.  I  will — this  minute. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Good-by. 

Mitya.  To  our  pleasant  meeting ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna  goes  to  the  door;  from  the  door- 
way Lyubim  Karpych  comes  in. 


SCENE    XI 

The  same  and  Lyubim  Karpych 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Ah ! 

Lyubim  Karpych.  [Looking  at  Lyubov  Gordeyevna] 
Wait !  What  sort  of  a  creature  is  this .''  On  what  pretext  ? 
On  what  business  ?     We  must  consider  this  matter. 


86  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

Lytjbov  Gordeyevna.  Is  it  you,  uncle ! 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Oh,  it's  I,  niece  !  What  ?  You  got  a 
fright  ?  Clear  out,  never  mind !  I'm  not  the  man  to  tell 
tales.  I'll  put  it  in  a  box,  and  think  it  over  after,  all  in  my 
spare  time. 

Lyubov  GoRDEYE\TsrA.  Good-by.  [Goes  out. 


SCENE    XII 

MiTYA  and  Lyubim  Karpych 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Mitya,  receive  unto  thyself  Lyubim 
Karpych  Tortsov,  the  brother  of  a  wealthy  merchant. 

Mitya.  You  are  welcome. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  [Sits  down]  My  brother  turned  me  out ! 
And  in  the  street,  in  a  coat  like  this — one  has  to  dance  about 
a  bit !  The  frost — at  Christmas  time — ^brrr  ! —  My  hands 
are  frozen,  and  my  feet  nipped — brrr ! 

Mitya.  Warm  yourself  up,  Lyubim  Karpych. 

Lyubim  K\rpych.  You  will  not  drive  me  away,  Mitya.'' 
If  you  do,  I'll  freeze  in  the  yard — I'll  freeze  like  a  dog. 

Mitya.  How  could  I  ?     What  are  you  saying  ? 

Lyubim  Karpych.  You  see,  Mitya,  my  brother  turned 
me  out.  As  long  as  I  had  a  little  money,  I  strolled  about  in 
warm  places;  now  I  have  no  money,  and  they  won't  let  me 
come  in  anywhere.  All  I  had  was  two  francs  and  some-odd 
centimes !  Not  a  great  capital !  It  wouldn't  build  a  stone 
house !  It  wouldn't  buy  a  village !  What  could  one  do 
with  such  a  capital .''  Where  put  it  ?  Not  take  it  to  a  bank  ! 
So  then  I  took  this  capital  and  drank  it  up ! — squandered 
it ! — ■     That's  the  way  of  it ! 

Mitya.  Why  do  you  drink,  Lyubim  Karpych?  That 
makes  you  your  own  enemy. 


SCENE  XII       POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  87 

Lyubim  K\rpych.  Why  do  I  drink?  From  stupidity! 
Yes,  from  my  own  stupidity.     Why  did  you  think  I  drank? 

MiTYA.  You'd  better  stop  it. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  It's  impossible  to  stop ;  I've  got  started 
on  this  track. 

MiTYA.  What  track? 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Ah,  well,  listen — you're  a  kind  soul — 
what  this  track  was.  Only  you  listen,  take  note  of  it.  I 
was  left  when  my  father  died,  just  a  kid,  tall  as  a  bean  pole, 
a  little  fool  of  twenty.  The  wind  whistled  through  my  head 
like  an  empty  garret!  My  brother  and  I  divided  up  tilings: 
he  took  the  factory  himself,  and  gave  me  my  share  in  money, 
drafts  and  promissory  notes.  Well,  now,  how  he  divided 
with  me  is  not  our  business — God  be  liis  judge !  Well,  then 
I  went  to  Moscow  to  get  money  on  the  drafts.  I  had  to  go ! 
One  must  see  people  and  show  oneself,  and  learn  good  man- 
ners. Then  again,  I  was  such  a  handsome  young  man,  and 
I'd  never  seen  the  world,  or  spent  the  night  in  a  private  house. 
I  felt  I  must  try  everything  !  F'irst  thing,  I  got  myself  dressed 
like  a  dandy.  "Know  our  people!"  says  I.  That  is,  I 
played  the  fool  to  a  rarity  !  Of  course,  I  started  to  visit  all 
the  taverns:  "  Schpeelen  sie  polka  I  Give  us  a  bottle  off  the 
ice!"  I  got  together  enough  friends  to  fill  a  pond !  I  went 
to  the  theatres 

MiTYA.  Well,  Lyubim  Karpych,  it  must  be  very  nice  in 
the  theatre. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  I  kept  going  to  see  the  tragedies;  I 
liked  them  very  much,  only  I  didn't  see  anytliing  decently, 
and  I  didn't  understand  anything  because  I  was  nearly  always 
drunk.  [Rises]  "Drink  beneath  the  dagger  of  Prokop  Lya- 
punov."  [Sits  down]  By  this  sort  of  life  I  soon  squandered 
all  my  money ;  what  was  left  I  intrusted  to  my  friend  Afrikan 
Korshunov,  on  his  oath  and  word  of  honor;   with  him  I  had 


88  POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

drunk  and  gone  on  sprees,  he  was  responsible  for  all  my  folly, 
he  was  the  chief  mixer  of  the  mash !  He  fooled  me  and 
showed  me  up,  and  I  was  stuck  like  a  crab  on  a  sand  bank. 
I  had  nothing  to  drink,  and  I  was  thirsty — what  was  to  be 
done?  Where  could  I  go  to  drown  my  misery?  I  sold  my 
clothes,  all  my  fashionable  tilings;  got  pay  in  bank-notes, 
and  changed  them  for  silver,  tlie  silver  for  copper,  and  then 
everything  went  and  all  was  over. 

MiTYA.  How  did  you  live,  Lyubim  Karpych? 

Lyubim  Karpych.  How  did  I  live?  May  God  never  give 
such  a  life  to  a  Tatar !  I  lived  in  roomy  lodgings,  between 
heaven  and  earth,  with  no  walls  and  no  ceiling.  I  was 
ashamed  to  see  people.  I  hid  from  the  world;  and  yet  you 
have  to  go  out  into  God's  world,  for  you  have  notliing  to 
eat.  You  go  along  the  street,  and  everybody  looks  at  you. 
—  Every  one  had  seen  what  a  life  I  used  to  lead,  how  I 
rattled  through  the  town  in  a  first-class  cab,  and  now  went 
about  tattered  and  torn  and  unshaven.  They  shook  their 
heads  and  away  they  went.  Shame,  shame,  shame !  [Sits 
and  hangs  his  head]  There  is  a  good  business — a  trade  wdiich 
pays — to  steal.  But  this  business  didn't  suit  me — I  had  a 
conscience,  and  again  I  was  afraid:  no  one  approves  of  this 
business. 

Mitya.  That's  a  last  resort. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  They  say  in  other  countries  they  pay 
you  thalers  and  thalers  for  this,  but  in  our  country  good 
people  punch  your  head  for  it.  No,  my  boy,  to  steal  is 
abominable !  That's  an  old  trick,  we'll  have  to  give  it  up  ! 
But,  you  see,  hunger  isn't  a  kind  old  aunty,  and  you  have 
to  do  something  !  I  began  to  go  about  the  town  as  a  buffoon, 
to  get  money,  a  kopek  at  a  time,  to  make  a  fool  of  myself,  to 
tell  funny  stories,  and  play  all  sorts  of  tricks.  Often  you 
shiver  from  early  morn  till  night  in  the  town  streets;    you 


SCENE  XII       POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  89 

hide  somewhere  behind  the  corner  away  horn  people,  and 
wait  for  merchants.  When  one  conies — especially  if  he  is 
rather  rich — you  jump  out  and  do  some  trick,  and  one  givea 
you  five  kopeks,  and  another  ten:  with  that  you  take 
breath  for  a  day  and  so  exist. 

MiTYA.  It  would  have  been  better,  Lyubim  Karpych,  to 
go  to  your  brother,  than  to  live  like  that. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  It  was  impossible;  I'd  been  drawn  in. 
Oh,  Mitya,  you  get  into  this  groove,  and  it  isn't  easy  to  get 
out  again.  Don't  interrupt!  You'll  have  a  chance  later. 
Well,  then,  listen  !  I  caught  cold  in  the  town — it  was  winter; 
I  stood  in  the  cold,  smartly  dressed,  in  this  coat !  I  was 
blowing  on  my  fingers  and  jumping  from  foot  to  foot.  Good 
people  carried  me  to  the  hospital.  When  I  began  to  get 
better  and  come  to  my  senses,  my  drunken  spell  was  over. 
Dread  came  over  me !  Horror  seized  me !  How  had  I 
lived?  What  had  I  done?  I  began  to  feel  melancholy; 
yes,  such  melancholy  that  it  seemed  better  to  die.  And  so 
I  decided  that  when  I  got  quite  well,  I  would  go  on  a  pil- 
grimage, then  go  to  my  brother,  and  let  him  take  me  as  a 
porter.  This  I  did.  I  threw  myself  plump  at  his  feet ! 
"Be  a  father  to  me!"  says  I,  "I  have  lived  abominably — 
now  I  wish  to  reform."  And  do  you  know  how  my  brother 
received  me !  He  was  ashamed,  you  see,  that  he  had  such 
a  brother.  "But  you  help  me  out,"  I  said  to  him,  "correct 
me,  be  kind  to  me,  and  I  will  be  a  man."  "Not  at  all," 
says  he,  "where  can  I  put  you  when  important  guests,  rich 
merchants,  and  gentry  come  to  see  me?  You'll  be  the  death 
of  me,"  says  he!  "With  my  feelings  and  intellect,"  says  he, 
"I  ought  not  to  have  been  born  in  this  family  at  all.  See 
how  I  live,"  says  he;  "who'd  ever  guess  that  our  father  was 
a  peasant!  For  me,"  says  he,  "this  disgrace  is  enough,  and 
then  you  must  come  and  obtrude  yourself  again."     He  over- 


90  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  i 

whelmed  me  as  with  thunder !  After  these  words  I  went 
from  bad  to  worse.  "Oh,  well,"  I  thought,  "deuce  take  him  ! 
He  is  very  thick  here.  [Points  to  his  forehead]  He  needs  a 
lesson,  the  fool.  Riches  are  no  use  to  fools  like  us;  they  spoil 
us.  You  need  to  know  how  to  manage  money."  [Dozes  off] 
Mitya,  I'll  lie  down  here;   I  want  to  take  a  nap. 

MiTYA.  Do  lie  down,  Lyubim  Karpych. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Mitya,  don't  give  me  any  money — 
that  is,  don't  give  me  much;  just  give  me  a  little.  I'll  take 
a  nap  here,  and  then  go  and  warm  myself  a  little,  you  under- 
stand !     I  only  need  a  little — no,  no !     Don't  be  foolish  ! 

Mitya.  [Taking  out  money]  Here,  take  as  much  as  you  need. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  I  need  ten  kopeks.  This  is  all  silver; 
I  don't  need  silver.  Give  me  two  kopeks  more,  that  will  be 
just  right.  [Mitya  gives  them]  That's  enough.  You  have  a 
good  heart,  Mitya !  [Lies  down]  My  brother  doesn't  know 
how  to  appreciate  you.  Yes,  I'll  play  a  joke  on  him !  For 
fools  riches  are  an  evil !  Give  money  to  a  sensible  man,  and 
he'll  do  something  with  it.  I  walked  about  Moscow,  I  saw 
everything,  everything ! — I've  been  tlirough  a  long  course  of 
study!  You'd  better  not  give  money  to  a  fool;  he'll  only 
go  smash  !  Foh,  foh,  foh,  brr  !  just  like  brother  and  like  me, 
the  brute !  [In  a  voice  half  asleep]  Mitya,  I  will  come  and 
spend  the  night  with  you. 

Mitya.  Come  on.  The  office  is  empty  now — it's  a  holi- 
day. 

Lyubim  Karpych,  Oh,  but  I'll  play  a  funny  joke  on 
brother.  [Falls  asleep. 

Mitya.  [Walks  towards  the  door  and  takes  the  letter  out  of 
his  pocket]  What  can  she  have  written  ?  I'm  frightened ! — 
My  hands  tremble ! — Well,  what  is  to  be  will  be !  I'll  read 
it.  [Reads]  "And  I  love  you.     Lyubov  Tortsov." 

[Clutches  his  head  and  runs  out. 


ACT   II 

Guest-room  in  the  house  of  Tortsov.  Against  the  rear  toall  a 
sofa,  in  front  of  the  sofa  a  round  table  and  six  armchairs, 
three  on  each  side;  in  the  left  corner  a  door;  on  each  wall 
a  mirror,  and  under  them  little  tables.  A  door  in  each  side 
wall,  and  a  door  in  the  rear  wall  in  the  corner.  On  the 
stage  it  is  dark;  from  the  left  door  comes  a  light. 

SCENE    I 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna  ajid  Anna  Ivanovna  enter  through 
the  lighted  door. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Why  don't  they  come,  our  fine  lads? 
Shall  we  go  and  fetch  them  ? 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  No,  you'd  better  not.  Well, 
yes,  if  you  like,  fetch  them.  [Embraces  her]  Fetch  them, 
Annushka. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Well,  evidently  you  aren't  happy  with- 
out him ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Oh,  Annushka,  if  you  only  knew 
how  I  love  him  ! 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Love  him,  then,  my  dear,  but  don't  lose 
your  wits.  Don't  let  him  go  too  far,  or  you  may  be  sorry 
for  it.     Be  sure  you  find  out  first  what  sort  of  a  fellow  he  is. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  He's  a  good  lad ! — I  love  him  very 
much;  he's  so  quiet,  and  he's  an  orphan. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Well,  if  he's  good,  then  love  him;  you 
ought  to  know  best.  I  just  said  that !  Many  a  girl  comes 
to  grief  because  of  them.  It's  easy  to  get  into  trouble,  if 
you  don't  use  your  sense. 

91 


92  POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  act  ii 

Lyubov  Gordeyev'na.  What  is  oiir  love?  Like  a  blade 
of  grass  in  the  field ;   it  blooms  out  of  season — and  it  fades. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Wait  a  moment !  Some  one's  coming,  I 
think.  Isn't  it  he  .^  I'll  go  and  you  wait,  perhaps  it's  he ! 
Have  a  good  talk  with  him.  [She  goes  out. 

MiTYA  enters. 

SCENE    II 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna  and  Mitya 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Who's  there? 

Mitya.  It's  I,  Mitya. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Why  were  you  so  long  in  coming  ? 

Mitya.  I  was  detained.  [Approaches]  Lyubov  Gordeyevna, 
are  you  alone? 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Yes,  what  of  it? 

Mitya.  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  how  do  you  wish  me  to 
understand  your  letter?  Do  you  mean  it,  or  is  it  a  joke? 
[Lyubov  Gordeyevna  is  silent]  Tell  me,  Lyubov  Gorde- 
yevna !  I  am  now  in  such  perplexity  that  I  cannot  express 
it  to  you.  My  position  in  your  house  is  known  to  you ;  subor- 
dinate to  everybody,  and  I  may  say  utterly  despised  by  Gor- 
dey  Karpych.  I've  had  only  one  feeling,  that  for  you,  and 
if  I  receive  ridicule  from  you,  then  it  would  have  been  better 
for  me  never  to  have  lived  in  this  world.  You  may  trust 
me !     I  am  telling  you  the  truth. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  No,  Mitya  dear,  what  I  wrote  to 
you  was  the  truth,  and  not  a  joke.  And  you,  do  you  love 
me? 

Mitya.  Indeed,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  I  do  not  know  how 
to  express  to  you  what  I  feel.  But  at  least  let  me  assure 
you  that  I  have  a  heart  in  my  breast,  and  not  a  stone.  You 
can  see  my  love  from  everything. 


SCENE  II         POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  93 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  But  I  thought  that  you  loved 
Anna  Ivanovna. 

MiTYA.  That  is  not  true ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Really,  they  told  me  so. 

MiTYA.  If  this  were  true,  then  what  sort  of  a  man  should 
I  be  after  acting  as  I  have.^  Could  I  declare  with  words 
what  my  heart  does  not  feel !  I  think  such  a  thing  would 
be  dishonorable !  I  may  not  be  worth  your  regard,  but  I'm 
not  the  man  to  deceive  you. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  It  is  impossible  to  believe  you 
men;  all  men  in  the  world  are  deceivers. 

Mitya.  Let  them  be  deceivers,  but  I  am  not. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  How  car.  one  know  !  Perhaps  you 
also  are  deceiving  me  and  want  to  play  a  joke  on  me ! 

Mitya.  It  would  be  easier  for  me  to  die  in  this  place 
than  to  hear  such  words  from  you !  [Turns  away. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  No,  Mitya,  I  didn't  mean  it.  I 
know  that  you  love  me.  I  only  wanted  to  tease  you.  [Mitya 
is  silent]  Mitya  dear !  Mitya !  Why  are  you  silent  ?  Are 
you  angry  with  me  ?  I  tell  you  I  was  only  joking  !  Mitya  ! 
Yes  !     Now,  then,  say  something.  [Takes  his  hand. 

Mitya.  Oh,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  I'm  not  in  a  joking 
humor !     I'm  not  that  sort  of  man. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Don't  be  angry. 

Mitya.  If  you  love  me,  then  stop  these  jokes !  They  are 
not  in  place.  Oh,  it's  all  the  same  to  me  now  !  [Embraces 
her]  Maybe  they  can  take  you  from  me  by  force,  but  I 
won't  give  you  up  of  my  free  will.  I  love  you  more  than 
my  life ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Returning  his  embrace]  Mitya 
dear,  what  shall  we  do  now  ? 

Mitya.  What  shall  we  do?  We  didn't  fall  in  love  with 
each  other  just  to  say  good-by  ! 


94  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  ii 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Well,  but  what  if  they  promise 
me  to  some  one  else? 

MiTYA.  Look  here,  Lyubov,  one  word !  To-morrow  we 
must  go  together  to  Gordey  Karpych,  and  throw  ourselves 
at  his  feet.  We'll  say  so  and  so— wdiatever  you  please,  but 
we  can't  live  without  each  other.  Yes,  if  you  love  me,  then 
forget  your  pride ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  What  pride,  Mitya.''  Is  this  a 
time  for  pride!  Mitya  dear,  don't  be  angry  with  me;  don't 
remember  my  past  words.  It  was  only  girlish  foolishness; 
I'm  sorry  that  I  did  it!  I  shouldn't  have  joked  with  you; 
I  should  have  caressed  you,  my  poor  boy.  [Throws  her  arms 
round  his  neck]  Oh,  but,  if  father  doesn't  consent  to  our  hap- 
piness—  what  then.'* 

Mitya.  Who  can  tell  beforehand  ?  It  will  be  as  God 
wills.  I  don't  know  how  it  is  with  you,  but  for  me  life  is 
not  life  without  you  !  [Is  silent. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Some  one's  coming !  Go  away 
quietly,  dearest,  and  I'll  come  later. 

Mitya  goes  out  quietly.     Arina  comes  in  with  a  candle  ; 
Lyubov  Gordeyevna  goes  to  meet  her. 


SCENE    III 

Arina,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  and  afterwards  Egorushka 

Arina.  W^ell,  you !  You  frightened  me  enough !  What 
are  you  doing  here.'*  Your  mother  is  looking  for  you  there, 
and  here  you  are !  Why  are  you  wandering  about  in  the 
dark !  Oh,  you  modest  maiden !  Fairy  princess.  [Lyubov 
Gordeyevna  goes  out]  Well,  really,  wasn't  some  one  there 
with  her  ?  [Looks  into  the  corner]  But  I'm  a  silly  old  woman, 
I  suspected  some  one  !  [Lights  the  candles]  Oh,  deary  me,  some 


SCENE  IV        POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  95 

trouble  will  be  sure  to  come  in  my  old  age.  [Egorushka 
enters]  Go  along,  Egorushka,  and  call  the  girls  in  from  the 
neighbors;  tell  them  Pelageya  Egorovna  told  you  to  invite 
them  to  come  and  sing  songs. 

Egorushka.  Oh!  how  are  you,  Arina,  my  dear? 

Arina.  What  are  you  so  happy  about,  silly  ? 

Egorushka.  Why  shouldn't  I  be  happy  ?  It's  such  fun  ! 
Ha,  ha,  ha  !  [Jumps  about. 

Arina.  And  maybe  the  mummers  are  coming;  the  young 
people  wanted  to  dress  up. 

Egorushka.  Oh,  I  shall  die  !     Oh,  Lord,  I  shall  die  ! 

Arina.  What's  the  matter  with  you,  you  scamp  .f* 

Egorushka.  Oh,  I  shall  die  of  laugliing !  Oh,  granny, 
I've  got  such  giggles  ! 

Arina.  Dress  up  yourself. 

Egorushka.  I  will,  I  will !     Oh,  Lord  !     Oh,  Oh,  Oh. 

Akina.  Now  you  run  along  quickly  and  fetch  the  girls. 

Egorushka.  In  a  second  !  [Goes  out. 

Pelageya  Egorovna  comes  in. 


SCENE    IV 

Arina  and  Pelageya  Egorovna 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Arinushka,  did  you  send  for  the 
girls .'' 

Arina.  I  did,  my  dear. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  That's  right.  Let  them  have  a 
song  with  our  folks,  and  cheer  up  Lyubov  and  the  guests. 
This  is  the  time  for  them  to  enjoy  themselves — while  they're 
young.  You  know  what  a  girl's  life  is — behind  bolts  and 
bars,  never  seeing  the  world !  Now's  their  holiday ! — Yes, 
let  'em  have  a  good  time ! 


96  POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  act  ii 

Arina.  Yes,  to  be  sure,  to  be  sure  !     Why  shouldn't  they? 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Bring  in  some  Madeira,  Arinushka, 
the  oldest  we  have;  and  gingerbread  for  the  young  people, 
and  sweets — whatever  you  choose !  Attend  to  it  yourself, 
but  don't  forget  the  Madeira. 

Arina.  I  understand,  I  understand;  there'll  be  enough  of 
everything.     Directly,  my  dear,  directly  ! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  And  a  snack  for  the  young  men. 

Arina.  Everything,  everything  will  be  all  right.  Don't 
you  worry  yourself;  you  join  the  guests.  I'll  do  everything 
with  pleasure.  [Goes  out. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  [Going  to  the  door]  Girls,  boys, 
come  here !     There's  more  room  here  and  it's  lighter. 

Enter  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  Masha,  Liza,  Anna 
Ivanovna,  Razlyulyayev,  Mitya,  Guslin,  and 
two  Guests. 


SCENE    V 

Pelageya  Egorovna,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  Masha,  Liza, 
Anna  Ivanovna,  Razlyulyayev,  Mitya,  Guslin,  a7id 
tivo  Guests  {old  tvonien). 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  [To  the  old  immen]  We'll  sit  here. 
[Seats  herself  on  the  sofa,  loith  the  old  ivonien  near  her ;  Anna 
Ivanovna  and  Guslin  take  chairs  and  talk  quietly  ;  Mitya 
stands  near  them;  Masha,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  and  Liza 
walk  about  the  room  with  their  arms  round  each  other ;  Razly- 
ulyayev/o//o?/'s  them]  We'll  watch  them  wliile  they  play. 

Liza.  "Just  imagine,  mother!"  I  said,  "he  doesn't  know 
how  to  talk  properly,  and  he  even  uses  such  words  that  it's 
absolutely  impolite." 


SCENE  V         POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  97 

Razlyulyayev.  Do  you  mean  me? 

Liza.  We  aren't  talking  about  you;  it's  no  business  of 
yours.  [She  continues]  "But  whj%  mother,  must  I  love  him.''" 

[Speaks  in  a  lohisjper. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Yes,  my  friend,  I  love  the  good  old 
ways.  Yes,  our  good  old  Russian  ways.  But  there !  my 
husband  doesn't  care  for  them  !  What  can  you  do  about 
it.''  That's  his  character.  But  I  love  them,  I'm  naturally 
jolly;  yes,  I  love  to  give  a  person  a  bite  and  to  get  them  to 
sing  songs  to  me !  Yes,  I  take  after  my  family.  Our  family 
are  all  jolly,  and  love  singing. 

First  Guest.  When  I  look  round,  my  dear  Pelageya 
Egorovna,  there  isn't  the  gayety  that  there  used  to  be  when 
we  were  young. 

Second  Guest.  No,  no. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  In  my  young  days  I  was  the  merri- 
est sort  of  girl — -always  singing  and  dancing— indeed  I  was. 
Yes,  what  songs  I  knew !     They  don't  sing  such  songs  now. 

First  Guest.  No,  they  don't  sing  them;  new  songs  have 
come  in  now. 

Second  Guest.  Yes,  yes,  one  remembers  the  old  times. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Yasha  dear !  Sing  us  some  good 
old  songs. 

Guslin  takes  the  guitar. 

Razlyulyayev.  [To  the  girls]  So  it's  no  use  for  me  to 
wait;  evidently  I  shan't  get  any  sense  out  of  you. 

Liza.  What  do  you  mean  by  sense  .^     I  don't  understand. 

Masha.  It's  ridiculous  to  listen  to  you. 

Razlyulyayev.  Yes,  it's  funny  for  you;  but  how  is  it 
for  me  ?     Really,  why  don't  you  love  me  ? 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Let's  sit  down. 
They  sit  down. 


98  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  n 

GusLiN.  [Sr/t^«] 

"Four  huts  beside  the  brook 
That  swift  doth  run. 
There  is  a  gossip 
In  every  one. 

Dear  gossips  all  four, 
My  friends  that  be. 
Be  friendly  and  kindly 
And  nice  to  me. 

When  you're  in  the  green  garden, 
Take  me  with  you; 
When  you  pluck  flowers. 
Pluck  me  a  few. 

When  you  weave  garlands, 
Weave  me  some  too; 
When  you  go  to  the  river. 
Take  me  with  you. 

When  you  throw  in  the  garlands. 
Throw  also  my  wreath; 
The  others  will  float, 
When  mine  sinks  beneath. 

All  of  the  sweethearts, 
They  have  come  home; 
Mine,  and  mine  only, 
He  has  not  come." 

Arina.  [Enters  with  bottles  and  glasses;  and  a  servant-girl 
with  relishes]  Here,  I've  brought  them ! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  [To  the  servant]  Pass  it  to  the  young 
ladies.  [The  servant  carries  wine  round  to  the  girls,  places  the 


SCENE  V         POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  99 

tray  on  the  table  and  goes  out]  Arina !  Bring  us  some  wine. 
Yes,  pour  it  out,  pour  out  the  Madeira,  the  Madeira;  it 
will  cheer  us  up.  That's  all  right !  Let's  have  a  glass; 
they  won't  condemn  us — we're  old  folks!  [They  drink] 
Annushka !  Come  along  and  drink  some  wine.  Won't  you 
have  some  ? 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Well,  why  shouldn't  I  drink  some ! 
They  say,  don't  drink  when  there's  no  one  round,  but  when 
there's  company,  it's  all  right. 

Goes  to  Pelageya  Egorovna,  drinks  and  talks  in  a 
whisper. 

Arina.  Have  you  had  a  drop  too  much,  my  boys  .'* 

MiTYA.  I  don't  drink. 

Razlyulyayev.  With  pleasure  !  [He  comes  up  loith  Guslin 
and  drinks;  then  catches  hold  of  Arina]  Now,  then,  let's  start 
an  old  song.  [Sings. 

"Oh,  I'll  sing  an  old  song. 
Of  Erema,  of  Foma " 

Arina.  Stop,  saucy;   you've  crumpled  me  all  up! 
Razlyulyayev.  [Sings] 

"The  reins  were  in  Kaluga; 
In  Tarus'  the  hames  were  hid. 
Grooved  runners  had  the  sleigh; 
All  by  itself  it  slid." 

The  girls  laugh. 
Arina.  Let  me  go,  I  say  !     Now  that's  enough  !     [Goes  out. 
Anna  Ivanovna.  What  are  you  teasing  tlie  old  woman  for  ? 
Come  and  dance  with  me. 

Razlyulyayev.  Come  on,  then  !     Play  for  us,  Yasha  ! 

Yasha  plays;  they  dance. 
First  Guest.  That's  a  lively  little  woman. 


100  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  n 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Yes,  very  lively,  very  lively. 
Razlyulyayev.  [Stamping    his  feet]  That's   the  way  we 
do  it.  [Stops  dancing. 

Egorushka.  [Enters]  The  girls  have  come. 
Pelageya  Egorovna.  Ask  them  in.  [Egorushka  ^oe*  owi; 
the  girls  come  in.     Arina  brings  in  a  dish  and  covers  it]  Sit 
down  and  sing  the  dish  songs;  I'm  so  fond  of  them. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  Masha,  Liza,  and  Anna 
IvANOVNA  take  off  their  rings  and  put  them  into  the 
dish;  the  girls  sing. 

"Sow  the  wheat,  my  mother,  and  bake  the  cake  for  me. 
Glory ! 
Many  guests  are  coming,  my  lovers  for  to  be.     Glory ! 

Your  guests  will  wear  bast  slippers,  but  mine  have  boots 
of  hide.     Glory  ! 

The  girl  of  whom  the  song  is  sung,  much  good  it  doth  be- 
tide.    Glory ! 

The  girl  whose  ring  is  taken  out,  will  find  it  so  without  a 
doubt.     Glory!" 

Razlyulyayev  rolls  iip  his  sleeves,  takes  out  a  ring  and 
gives  it  to  Lyubov  Gordeyevna. 
Pelageya  Egorovna.  High  time,  high  time ! 
Girls.  [Sing] 

"In  Belgorod  a  sparrow  small.       Glory! 
In  Belgorod  sits  on  a  wall.     Glory ! 

In  a  strange  land  he  looks  about.     Glory ! 
Her  ring  and  fortune  will  come  out.     Glory!" 

Arina.  [Enters]  The    mummers    have   come;     shall    I    let 
them  in  ? 


SCENE  VI       POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  101 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Yes,  let  them  in;    let  them  have  a 
dance.     And  you  girls  can  sing  afterwards. 


SCENE    VI 

The  same  and  mummers  ;  an  Old  Mak  unth  a  balalaika  or 
guitar,  a  Trainer  with  a  bear  and  goat,  Egorushka  with 
molasses. 

Old  Man.     [Bowing]  To  all  this  honest  company,  greet- 
ing! 

Trainer.  Make  a  bow,  Mishka  !  [The  bear  bows. 

Old  Man.  Do  you  wish  me  to  sing  and  darce  and  amuse 
you,  and  to  limber  up  my  old  bones.'' 

Pelageya  Egoro\t^a.  That's  all  right;  yes,  dance  !     Give 
them  some  wine,  Arinushka. 

Arina  serves  the  unne ;   some  of  them  drink. 

Old  Man.  Thank  you  humbly  for  your  kind  words,  and 
for  the  entertainment.  [Sings. 

"Our  lads,  though  stripped  unto  the  buff. 
Even  so  are  bold  enough. 
Their  twelve  hands  go  weaving  on; 
Now  the  web  of  cloth  is  done. 
They  made  kaftans  for  us  here; 
Kaftans  do  not  cost  you  dear 
When  you've  grist  within  your  hopper. 
In  our  purses  silver  bright 
Will  not  let  us  sleep  at  night. 
And  the  jingling  coins  of  copper 
For  the  tavern  raise  the  call. 
Tapster  Andrew,  quick  undo 
The  inn-door.     We've  a  kaftan  new 


102  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  n 

Here  to  put  in  pawn  with  you; 
We  won't  take  it  home  at  alh" 

[Goes  to  one  side. 
Egorushka.  [Dances  with  the  molasses] 

"Molasses!     Molasses! 
It  simmers  so  sweet. 
Oh,  winter  is  bitter. 
The  frost  and  the  sleet. 

Stormy  and  snowy,  oh,  ways  choked  with  snow, 
Unto  my  darling  there's  no  way  to  go. 

Molasses !     Molasses ! 

It  simmers  so  sweet. 

Like  a  little  quail  my  wife 

Sits  on  her  seat. 

And  I  love  her  for  this,  and  her  praises  I  tell. 

For  she  jaunts  on  so  prettily,  proudly  and  well." 

[Bows. 
First  Guest.  Oh,  w  hat  a  fine  boy  !     Ah  ! 
Pelageya  Egorovna.  Why,  yes,  my  friend,  he's  still  a 
child ;  but  he  does  the  best  he  can.     He's  young  yet.     Come 
here,  Egorushka.     [Egorushka  conies]  Here's  some  ginger- 
bread for  you.  [Gives  it  to  him;   Egorushka  boivs  and  goes 
out]  Yes,  he's  still  a  child;  you  can't  expect  much  from  him  ! 
The  Trainer  leads  the  bear;  the  goat  dances. 
Old  Man.  [Sings] 

"We  had  a  httle  billy-goat, 
And  he  was  clever,  too; 
He  carried  in  the  water. 
And  set  the  mush  to  brew. 

He  fed  Grandpa  and  Grandma; 
But  when  he  went  one  day 


SCENE  VI       POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  103 

To  the  dark  forest  seven  wolves 
In  waiting  for  him  lay. 

And  one  of  them  was  hungry. 
And  many  and  many  a  year 

Had  he  roamed,  forever  asking 
For  goat's  meat  far  and  near." 

Trainer.  [To  the  bear]  Ask  for  wine,  in  honor  of  the  goat. 

[Bear  bows. 
Pelageya  Egorovna.  Arinushka,  bring  some  refreshments 
for  the  mummers. 

Arina  brings  them  something  to  drink;  they  drink  and 
bow. 
Trainer.  Now,  then,  amuse  the  honorable  company. 
Show  how  the  fair  young  darlings,  the  fair  young  girls,  pale 
and  rosy  ones,  glance  at  the  young  men,  and  watch  their 
suitors.  [Bear  shoivs  off]  And  how  the  old  woman  goes  to 
work,  bending,  slirivelled;  old  age  has  overcome  her,  the 
years  have  broken  her  down.  [Bear  shows  off]  Well,  now 
bow  to  the  honorable  company.^ 

They  go  out;  the  Old  Man  plays  the  guitar;  the  other 
mummers  dance ;  all  watch  them.  Guslin  and 
MiTYA  stand  near  Lyubov  Gordeyevna;  Mitya 
whispers  something  to  her,  and  kisses  her.  Raz- 
lyulyayev  comes  up. 
Razlyulyayev.  What  are  you  doing.'' 
Mitya.  What's  that  to  you.-* 

Razlyulyayev.  I'll  tell  Pelageya  Egorovna;  just  see  if  I 
don't ! 

Mitya.  You  just  dare  to  tell ! 

'  Ostrovsky  is  of  course  reproducing  actual  Christmas  customs.  Count  Ilya  Tol- 
stoy, in  his  Reminiscences  of  Tolstoy,  tells  how  his  father  played  the  part  of  the  bear 
at  the  family  Christmas  party. 


104  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  ii 

GusLiN.  [Approaching  him]  Look  out  for  hr' !  You  see 
we'll  go  away  from  here  together;  it'll  be  dark  and  the  alley 
is  lonely — just  remember  that ! 

Razlyulyayev.  What  are  you  meddling  with  me  for? 
What's  the  use?  I  want  to  marry  her,  and  I'm  going  to 
make  proposals.  What  are  you  up  lo !  Yes,  I  mean  to 
marry  her  ! 

MiTYA.  We'll  see  about  that. 

Razlyulyayev.  Do  you  think  they'll  marry  her  to  you  ? 
Not  much !     Not  if  I  know  it — I've  got  lots  of  money ! 

Arina.  What  a  racket !  Stop !  Some  one  seems  to  be 
knocking.  [All  listen]  That's  true !     They  are  knocking. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Go  and  open  the  door. 

Arina.  [Goes  out,  then  returns]  He's  come  back  himself ! 
All  rise. 

SCENE    VII 

The  same  with  Gordey  Karpych  and  Korshunov 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  [To  the  mummers]  What's  this  rabble! 
— Get  out !  [To  his  wife]  Wife!  Pelageya  Egorovna  !  Greet 
my  guest.  [Speaks  in  a  low  voice]  You've  ruined  me ! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  You  are  welcome,  Afrikan  Savvich, 
you  are  welcome. 

Korshunov.  Good  evening,  Pelageya  Egorovna.  He,  he, 
he !  It's  very  cheerful  here !  We've  struck  it  just  at  the 
right  time. 

Pelageya  EGORO^^^"A.  Yes,  here  I  am  with  the  girls.  Yes, 
I'm  always  with  the  girls.  It's  holiday  time;  I  want  to  give 
my  daughter  some  fun. 

Gordey  Karpych.  You  are  welcome,  Afrikan  Savvich; 
make  yourself  at  home.  [Afrikan  Sawich  seats  himself  in 
the  armchair  at  the  table.     To  his  wife]  Turn  the  hussies  out. 


SCENE  VII       POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  105 

KoRSHUNOV.  Why  turn  them  out !  Who's  going  to  turn 
the  girls  out.  He,  he,  he !  They'll  sing  a  song,  and  we'll 
listen  and  watch  them,  and  we'll  give  them  some  money, 
but  not  turn  them  out. 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  As  you  wish,  Afrikan  Savvieh  !  Only 
I  am  abashed  before  you !  But  don't  conclude  from  this 
that  we  are  all  uneducated — this  is  all  the  wife;  nothing  can 
knock  anything  into  her  head.  [To  his  wife]  How  many  times 
have  I  told  you :  if  you  want  to  have  a  party  in  the  evening, 
call  in  the  musicians,  and  have  things  in  good  form.  You 
can't  say  I  deny  you  anything. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Well,  what's  the  use  of  musicians — 
for  us  old  women  ?     You  can  amuse  yourself  with  them ! 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  There,  that's  the  idea  of  life  she  has ! 
It  makes  you  laugh  to  hear  her. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  What  do  you  mean.^  Idea,  ideal 
It  would  be  better  for  you  to  give  your  guest  something  to 
eat.  Would  you  like  something,  Afrikan  Savvieh  ?  Some 
wine  with  us  old  women  ?  [Pours  out  Madeira. 

Gordey  Karpych.  [Severely]  Wife !  Have  you  really 
gone  out  of  your  mind !  Hasn't  Afrikan  Savvieh  ever  seen 
Madeira  before  !  Order  champagne — a  half  dozen — and  be 
quick  about  it !  Then  order  lighted  candles  in  the  reception- 
room  where  the  new  furniture  is.  That  will  give  quite  an- 
other effect. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  I  will  do  it  myself  at  once.  [Risesi 
Arinushka,  come  on.     Excuse  me,  my  dear  neighbors. 

First  Guest.  We  will  come  with  you,  my  dear;  it's  time 
we  were  going  home. 

Second  Guest.  It's  time,  it's  time !  The  nights  are  dark, 
and  the  dogs  in  the  lanes  are  fierce. 

First  Guest.  Yes,  fierce;   very  fierce! 

[They  bow  and  go  out. 


106  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  ii 


SCENE    VIII 

GoRDEY  Karpych,  Korshutstov,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna, 
Anna  Ivanovna,  Masha,  Liza,  girls,  Mitya,  Guslin, 
and  Razlyulyayev. 

KoRSHUNoy.  Let's  join  the  young  ladies.  Where  did  you 
pick  up  such  beauties — he,  he  !  [Walks  towards  Lyubov  Gor- 
deyevna] Good  evening,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  my  beauty. 
[Lyubov  Gordeyevna  bows]  May  I  join  your  company? 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  We  don't  drive  any  one  away. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Be  seated;  you'll  be  our  guest. 

KoRSHUNOV.  You're  pretty  chilly  to  the  old  man !  It's 
Christmas  time  now,  and  I  suppose  we  may  exchange  kisses. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Why  be  so  affectionate.'' 

KoRSHUNOV.  Gordey  Karpych,  may  I  kiss  your  daughter  ? 
And  I  must  confess — ^he,  he — I'm  fond  of  this  sort  of  thing. 
Yes,  well,  who  doesn't  like  it !     He,  he ! 

Gordey  Karpych.  You're  welcome  to  do  so;  don't  stand 
on  ceremony. 

KoRSHUNOV.  Will  you  give  me  a  kiss,  young  lady  ? 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  If  my  father  wants  me  to. 

[They  exchange  kisses. 

KoRSHUNOV.  Well  now,  every  one  of  them,  right  down 
the  line. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  I  suppose  so !     I'm  not  proud. 

Masha.  Oh,  how  embarrassing  ! 

Liza.  Well,  there's  nothing  to  be  said;  I  must  say  it's  a 
treat ! 

Gordey  Karpych.  [Going  up  to  Mitya]  Why  are  you 
here?  Is  this  your  place?  "The  crow  has  flown  into  the 
lofty  palace !" 

Mitya,  Guslin  and  Razlyulyayev  go  out. 


SCENE  IX       POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  107 


SCENE    IX 

GoRDEY    Karpych,    Korshunov,    Lyubov    Gordeyevna, 
Anna  Ivanovna,  Masha,  Liza  and  girls. 

Korshunov.  [Seats  himself  near  Lyubov  Gordeyevna] 
I'm  not  like  you,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna;  you  didn't  even 
want  to  kiss  me,  he,  he,  he !  And  I've  brought  you  a  Httle 
present. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  You  needn't  have  taken  the  trouble. 

Korshunov.  Here  I've  brought  you  some  diamonds,  he, 
he  !  [Gives  them  to  her. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Oh,  they're  earrings  !  I  thank  you 
humbly. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Show  them  to  us. 

Masha.  But  they  are  charming  ! 

Liza.  And  in  such  good  taste ! 

Korshunov.  Give  me  your  hand.  [Takes  it  and  kisses  it] 
You  see,  I  like  you  very  much,  he,  he,  he !  I  like  you  very 
much;  well,  but  you  don't  like  me,  I  suppose  .'^ 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Why  shouldn't  I  like  you  ? 

Korshunov.  Why  ?  You  like  some  one  else,  that's  why. 
But  you  will  come  to  love  me !  Fm  a  good  man — a  jolly 
man,  he,  he,  he ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  I  don't  know  what  you  are  talking 
about. 

Korshunov.  I  say,  you  will  come  to  love  me.  Why 
not.''  I'm  not  old  yet.  [Looks  at  her]  Am  I  an  old  man .5^ 
He,  he,  he !  Well,  well,  there's  no  harm  in  that.  To  make 
up  for  it  you  shall  wear  cloth  of  gold.  I  haven't  any  money  ! 
I'm  a  poor  man.  I've  only  got  about  five  hundred  thou- 
sand, he,  he,  he  !     In  silver  !  [Takes  her  hand. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Rising]  I  don't  need  your  money. 


108  POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  act  ii 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Lyubov,  where  are  you  going? 
Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  To  mother ! 
GoRDEY  Karpych.  Wait !     She'll  come  here. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevtsta  sits  down. 
KoRSHUNOV.  You    don't    want   to   sit   by    the   old    man  ? 
Give  me  your  hand,  young  lady;  I  will  kiss  it. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Gives  her  hand]  Oh,  good  heavens  ! 

KoRSHUNOV.  What  a  hand !     He,  he,  he !     Like  velvet ! 

[Strokes  her  hand,  and  then  pnts  on  a  diamond  ring. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Freeing  her  hand]  Oh,  let  me  go ! 

I  don't  want  it;  I  don't  want  it! 

KoRSHUNOV.  That's  all  right;   it's  no  loss  to  me— it  won't 
ruin  me. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  But  I  don't  want  it.     Give  it  to 
whomever  you  like.  [  Takes  it  off  and  returns  it. 

KoRSHUNOV.  I  gave  it  to  you,  and  I  won't  take  it  back ! 
He,  he,  he ! 

Enter  Pelageya  Egorovna,  and  after  her,  Arina  and 
Egorushka  with  wine  and  glasses. 


SCENE    X 

The  same  with  Pelageya  Egorovna,  Arina,  and  Egorushka 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Come  now  and  have  a  drink. 

KoRSHUNOV.  All  right,  Gordey  Karpych,  give  me  some- 
thing to  drink.  And  you  girls,  sing  a  song  in  my  honor — I 
love  to  have  respect  shown  me. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Girls,  sing  a  song  for  him. 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  [Uncorks  the  battle,  pours  out  cham- 
pagne, and  offers  it  to  him]  To  our  dear  friend  Afrikan  Sav- 
vich  !     Make  a  bow,  wife  ! 


SCENE  X        POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  109 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  If  you  please,  Afrikan  Savvich,  I 
humbly  beg  you. 

KoRSHUNOV  takes  the  glass. 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  [Takes  the  glass]  Wife,  drink! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Oh,  somehow  I  don't  like  this  kind 
of  wine !     Well,  yes  !     I'll  take  just  a  glass. 

Girls.  [Sing] 

"Ah,  who  is  he,  our  bachelor. 
And  who  is  still  unwed  ? 
Afrikan 's  our  bachelor 
And  Savvich  still  unwed. 
He  jumped  on  the  horse. 
The  horse  skips  to  and  fro; 
He  rides  through  the  meadows. 
And  green  the  meadows  grow. 
And  flowers  blow." 

KoRSHTJNOV.  [Seats  himself  near  Lyubov  Gordeyevna] 
That's  nice.  I  like  that.  Now,  then,  come  here  some  one. 
[A  girl  comes  up,  he  pats  her  on  the  cheek]  Oh,  you  little  bright 
eyes !  You  girls,  I  suppose,  need  a  lot  to  set  off  your  fair 
faces  and  rosy  blushes;  he,  he,  he!  But  I  haven't  any 
money  !  It  will  be  on  me,  he,  he,  he !  Hold  out  your  apron  ! 
[He  tosses  her  some  small  change  ;  the  girl  bows  and  goes  out] 
Now,  then,  Gordey  Karpych,  tell  your  wife  why  we  came. 

Gordey  Karpych.  I  told  you,  wife,  long  ago,  that  living 
in  this  town  bored  me,  because  you  can't  take  a  step  here 
without  seeing  that  the  people  are  absolutely  ignorant  and 
uneducated.  And  so  I  want  to  move  from  this  place  to 
Moscow.  But  there  will  be  a  man  there  who  is  no  stranger 
to  us — our  dear  son-in-law,  Afrikan  Savvich. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Oh  !     Oh  !     What  are  you  saying  ! 

KoRSHUNOV.  Yes,    we've   shaken    hands   on    it,    Pelageya 


110  POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  act  n 

Egorovna.     What  are  you  afraid  of?     I'm  not  going  to  eat 
her ! 

Pelageya  Egorovt^a.  Oh,  Lord !  [Seizes  her  daughter] 
She's  my  daugliter !     I  won't  give  her  up ! 

GORDEY  KL\I{PYCH.    Wife ! 

Pelageya  Egokovna.  My  dear  Gordey  Karpyeh  !  Don't 
trifle  with  a  mother's  heart !  Stop !  You've  fairly  stag- 
gered me ! 

Gordey  Karpych.  Wife,  you  know  me !  And  you,  Afri- 
kan  Savvich,  don't  be  uneasy:  with  me  saying  is  doing! 

KoRSHUNOV.  You  have  promised — then  keep  your  word. 
[Rises,  goes  to  the  girls,  and  speaks  to  them  in  a  low  voice. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Goes  to  her  father]  Father,  I  will 
never  take  a  step  against  your  will.  But  have  pity  on  me, 
poor  girl  that  I  am !     Don't  ruin  my  young  life ! 

Gordey  Karpych.  You're  a  fool,  and  don't  understand 
your  own  happiness!  You'll  live  in  Moscow  like  a  lady; 
you'll  ride  in  a  coach.  In  the  first  place,  you'll  live  in  the 
city — and  not  in  a  wilderness  like  this !  In  the  second 
place,  these  are  my  orders ! 

Lyubov  GoRDEYE\TsrA.  I  dare  not  disobey  your  command. 
Father!  [Bmvs  doum  to  his  feet]  Don't  make  me  unhappy  for 
my  whole  life  !  Relent,  father  !  Make  me  do  whatever  you 
like,  only  don't  compel  me  to  marry  a  man  I  don't  love ! 

Gordey  Karpych.  I  never  take  back  my  word.  [Rises. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  As  you  wish,  father ! 

[Bows  and  goes  to  her  mother. 

KoRSHUNOV.  There,  that  business  is  over !  Now,  then, 
girls — a  marriage  song  ! 

Girls.  [Sing] 

"The  flowers  in  the  garden  will  wither  all  about  me. 
The  blue  flower  in  the  meadow  will  be  faded  and  forlorn; 


SCENE  X        POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  111 

And  so  will  my  darling  of  the  red  cheeks  without  me; 

So  rise  up  early,  mother,  in  the  morn. 

You  must  water  all  the  flowers 

In  the  dawn  and  evening  hours 

With  water  very  often  and  with  bitter  tears  in  showers." 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Not  that,  not  that !     Sing  another  ! 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Let's  go  into  the  reception-room,  Afri- 
kan  Savvich.     Wife,  all  of  you,  come  there ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Where  can  I  hide  myself ! 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Arina,  bring  along  the  wine ! 

Arina.  Oh,  wait,  I  can't  attend  to  you  now  !     My  darling 
child  !     Girls,  my  dearies !     Here's  the  song  we'll  sing. 

[She  sings. 

"Thou  art  my  own,  my  mother. 
Who  grievest  day  by  day. 
And  at  night  to  God  dost  pray. 
Thou  who  art  so  downcast. 
Look  but  once  on  her  here. 
Thy  daughter  who  was  so  dear — 
For  the  last  time — ^the  last." 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  For  the  last  time. 

At  the  end  of  this  song  Gordey  Karpych  a)ul  Kor- 
SHUNOV  go  out;  Lyubov  Gordeyevna  remains  in 
the  embrace  of  her  mother,  surrounded  by  her  friends. 


ACT    III 

A  small  room  in  the  house  of  Tortsov,  furnished  with  cupboards 
of  various  sorts  ;  chests  and  shelves  with  plates  and  silver. 
Furniture:  sofas,  armchairs,  and  tables,  all  very  expensive 
and  crowded  together,  Usualb/  this  room  is  used  as  a  sort 
of  sitting-room  for  the  mistress  of  the  house,  lohere  she  directs 
her  household,  and  where  she  receives  her  guests  informally. 
One  door  leads  into  the  room  where  the  guests  are  dining, 
and  the  other  into  the  inner  rooms. 

SCENE    I 

Arina  is  seated  on  a  chair  near  the  door  leading  into  the  dining- 
room  ;  near  her  are  several  girls  and  women. 

Arina.  [Looking  into  the  dining-room]  I  didn't  expect  this, 
my  dear  friends  !  I  never  thought  to  see  it !  He  fell  upon 
us  like  a  hawk — -like  snow  on  the  head;  he  seized  our 
darling  swan  from  the  flock  of  her  dear  ones,  from  father, 
from  mother,  from  kinsfolk,  and  from  friends.  We  didn't 
realize  what  was  happening.  What  things  happen  in  this 
world  of  ours !  Nowadays  people  are  double-faced  and  sly, 
crafty,  and  cunning.  He  fairly  befogged  Gordey  Karpych 
with  this  and  that  in  his  old  age,  and  be  began  to  hanker 
after  his  wealth.  They  have  engaged  our  lovely  beauty  to 
a  disgusting  old  man.  Now  she  is  sitting  there,  my  darling, 
broken-hearted  !  Oh,  I'm  ready  to  die  !  After  I  have  brought 
you  up  and  nursed  you,  and  carried  you  in  my  arms !  I 
cared  for  you  like  a  little  bird — in  cotton  wool !  Just  now 
she  and  I  were  talking  it  over  together.  "We  won't  give 
you  up,  my  child,"  I  said,  "to  a  common  man!     Only  if 

112 


SCENE  II        POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  113 

some  prince  comes  from  foreign  lands,  and  blows  his  trum- 
pet at  our  door."  But  things  didn't  turn  out  our  way. 
Now  there  he  sits — the  man  who  is  going  to  tear  her  away — 
fat  and  flabby  !  Staring  and  smirking  at  her !  He  likes  it ! 
Oh,  confound  you  !  Well,  now  they've  finished  eating  and 
are  getting  up;    I  must  set  to  work. 

Rises  from  her  chair;   the  women  go  out;    Pelageya 
Egorovna  comes  in. 

^  SCENE    II 

Arina  and  Pelageya  Egorovna 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Come  along,  Arinushka,  and  help 
me  to  get  the  table  ready.  Yes,  I'll  sit  down  and  rest — 
I'm  tired. 

Arina.  Of  course  you  are  tired,  my  dear !  Day  in,  day 
out,  on  your  feet !     You  aren't  as  young  as  you  were  once  ! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  [Seating  herself  on  the  sofa]  Oh ! 
Tell  them  to  send  the  big  samovar  to  the  maids'  room — the 
very  biggest;  and  find  Annushka  and  send  her  to  me. 

Arina.  Certainly,  certainly. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Yes,  go  along !  Go  along  !  Oh,  I 
can't  stand  it !  [Arina  goes  out]  My  head's  fairly  splitting ! 
Nothing  but  sorrow — and  here  comes  more  trouble !  Yes, 
yes,  I'm  worried  to  death !  Oh,  oh,  oh !  I'm  tired  out, 
absolutely  tired  out !  I've  a  lot  to  do,  and  my  head's  just 
spinning.  I'm  needed  here,  and  I'm  needed  there,  and  I 
don't  know  what  to  begin  on  !  Really — yes —  [Sits  and  tries 
to  think]  What  a  husband  for  her !  What  a  husband  !  Oh, 
oh,  oh !  How  can  you  expect  her  to  love  him !  Do  you 
think  she  is  hankering  after  his  money  ?  She  is  a  girl  now — 
in  the  bloom  of  youth — and  I  suppose  her  heart  beats  now 
and  then !     What  she  ought  to  have  now  is  a  man  she  can 


114  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  m 

love— even  if  he's  poor — that  would  be  life !     That  would 
be  paradise ! 

Anna  Ivanovna  comes  in. 

SCENE    III 

Pelageya  Egorovna  and  Anna  Ivanovna 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Here  are  the  keys  of  the  tea  cup- 
board. Go  along  and  pour  it  out  for  the  guests,  and  do 
everything  that  is  necessary — you  know  yourself !  I've 
walked  my  legs  off!  But  you  don't  mind  it;  you're  young 
yet — yes,  go  and  serve  them. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  I'd  just  as  soon  as  not.  It's  no  great 
work;  my  hands  won't  wear  out ! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  There — there's  the  tea  in  the  cup- 
board, in  the  little  red  caddy. 

Anna  Ivanovna  unlocks  the  door  and  takes  out  the 
caddy.     Mitya  comes  in. 

SCENE    IV 

The  same  and  Mitya 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  What  do  you  want,  Mitya  dear? 

Mitya.  [Keeping  back  his  tears]  I — I — ■  Pelageya  Ego- 
rovna, for  all  your  kindness,  and  for  all  your  consideration — ■ 
even  though  it  may  be  I  am  not  worth  it — seeing  that  while 
I  was  an  orphan — you  never  deserted  me — and  like  a  mother 
— I  will  be  thankful  to  you  all  my  life,  and  will  always  pray 
to  God  for  you.  [Boivs  down  to  her  feet. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  But  what  are  you  doing,  Mitya.'' 

Mitya.  I  thank  you  for  everything.  And  now  good-by, 
Pelageya  Egorovna.  [Rises. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Where  are  you  going  ? 


SCENE  V        POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  115 

MiTYA.  I  plan  to  go  to  my  mother's. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Are  you  going  for  long  ? 

MiTYA.  Yes,  I  asked  the  master  for  a  vacation,  and  it's 
most  likely  that  I'll  stay  there  for  good. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  But  why  do  you  wish  to  leave  us, 
Mitya.'' 

MiTYA.  [Hesitating]  Why,  I  just ! —  You  see — I've  al- 
ready decided. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  But  when  are  you  going  ? 

MlTYA.  To-night.  [Is  silent]  I  thought  to  myself  that  I 
shouldn't  see  you  before  to-night,  and  so  I  came  to  say 
good-by. 

Pelagey'a  Egorovna.  Very  well,  Mitya,  if  you  are  needed 
there — we  won't  keep  you;   God  be  with  you  !     Good-by  ! 

Mitya.  [Bows  down  to  the  feet  of  Pelageya  EGORO\TsrA, 
exchanges  kisses  with  her  and  loith  Anna  Ivanovna;  then  bows 
again  and  waits]  Might  I  be  allowed  to  say  good-by  to 
Lyubov  Gordeyevna?  You  see  we  have  lived  in  the  same 
house — maybe  I  shall  die  before  I  see  her  again  ! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Yes,  you  must,  you  must.  Say 
good-by  to  her,  of  course  !     Annushka,  go  and  fetch  Lyubov. 

Anna  Ivanovna.  [Shaking  her  head]  "One  man  leads  her 
by  one  hand,  another  by  the  other,  a  third  stands  and  sheds 
tears;  he  loved  her,  but  did  not  get  her." 


SCENE    V 

Pelageya  Egorovna  and  Mitya 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Oh,  Mitya,  my  dear!  What 
trouble  we  are  in !  How  can  we  drive  it  away — get  rid  of 
it — I  cannot  think.  It's  as  if  a  thunderbolt  hud  struck  nie ! 
I  can't  recover  mvself. 


116  POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  act  m 

MiTYA.  Yoli  have  no  one  to  blame  but  yourself  for  your 
unhappiness,  Pelageya  Egorovna;  you  are  marrying  her  off 
yourself,  ma'am. 

PeLu\geya  Egorovna.  Yes,  we  are  <loing  it  ourselves;  we 
are  marrying  her  off  ourselves !  Only  it's  not  with  my  con- 
sent, Mitya!  If  I  had  my  way,  do  you  think  I'd  give  her 
up.'*     Do  you  think  I'm  her  enemy .^ 

Mitya.  He's  a  man — from  what  I  hear— not  a  very  great 
catch !  There's  nothing  good  to  be  heard  of  him — except 
what's  bad. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  I  know,  Mitya  dear,  I  know. 

Mitya.  Well,  from  all  accounts,  I  must  say  this,  that 
most  likely  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  married  to  such  a  man, 
and  living  far  away  from  you,  will  absolutely  perish — no 
doubt  of  it. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Oh,  don't  speak  of  it  to  me,  don't 
speak  of  it !  I'm  distracted  enough  about  it  without  your 
saying  anything.  I've  worn  my  eyes  out  with  gazing  at 
her !  If  I  could  only  look  at  her  enough  to  last  me  forever ! 
It's  as  if  I  were  getting  ready  to  bury  her. 

Mitya.  [Nearly  weeping]  How  can  such  things  happen .'' 
How  can  people  do  such  things.'*  She's  your  own  daughter, 
I  suppose ! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  If  she  weren't  my  own,  then  I 
shouldn't  be  weeping  and  wailing,  and  my  heart  wouldn't 
be  breaking  over  her  tears. 

Mitya.  Why  weep?  It  would  be  better  not  to  marry 
her.  Why  are  you  ruining  the  girl's  life,  and  giving  her  into 
slavery?  Isn't  this  a  sin?  You  will  have  to  answer  for  it 
to  God. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  I  know,  I  know  it  all,  but  I  tell  you, 
Mitya,  it's  not  my  doing.  Why  do  you  keep  on  blaming 
me  ?     It's  horrible  enough  for  me  without  your  talking  about 


SCENE  VI       POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  117 

it,  and  you  stir  me  up  still  more.     Mitya,  you  should  pity 
me ! 

Mitya.  It's  true,  Pelageya  Egorovna,  but  I  can't  endure 
this  sorrow.  Maybe  it's  worse  for  me  than  for  you !  I 
trust  you  so  much,  Pelageya  Egorovna,  that  I  will  open  my 
heart  to  you  as  if  you  were  my  own  mother.  [Dries  his  eyes 
with  his  handkerchief]  Yesterday  evening,  when  you  were 
having  the  evening  party.    [Tears  prevent  him  from  speaking. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Well,  well,  tell  me,  tell  me ! 

Mitya.  Well,  then,  she  and  I  made  a  compact  in  the  dark, 
that  we  would  go  together  to  you  and  to  Gordey  Karpych, 
and  beg  you  humbly;  we  were  going  to  say:  "Give  us  j'our 
blessing;  we  cannot  live  without  each  other  any  longer." 
[Dries  his  tears]  And  now  suddenly,  this  morning,  I  heard — 
and  my  arms  just  dropped  b}^  my  side ! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  What  are  you  saying? 

Mitya.  I  swear  it,  Pelageya  Egorovna,  in  the  name  of  the 
Lord  ! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.     Oh,  my  dear  boy  !     What  a  luck- 
less lad  you  are,  now  that  I  know  all ! 
Lyubov  Gordeyevna  conies  in. 


SCENE    VI 

The  same  and  Lyubov  Gordeyevna 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Here,  Lyubov  dear !  Mitya  has 
come  to  say  good-by;  he  is  going  away  from  here  to  his 
mother's. 

Mitya.  [Bonis]  Good-by,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna !  Don't 
bear  me  any  ill  will ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Good-by,  Mitya  !  [Bnirs. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Kiss  each  other  good-by;    it  may 


118  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  m 

be  that  God  will  not  let  yon  see  each  other  again.  Well, 
never  mind !  [Mitya  and  Lyubov  Gordeyevna  kiss  each 
other;  she  seats  herself  on  the  sofa  and  weeps;  Mitya  also 
weeps]  Stop,  stop  your  weeping !     You  will  drive  me  wild ! 

Mitya.  Oh,  I'll  risk  everything  now;  everything  in  the 
world !  [Goes  to  Pelageya  Egorovna]  Pelageya  Egorovna, 
are  you  sorry  to  marry  your  daughter  to  an  old  man,  or  not  ? 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  If  I  weren't  sorry,  I  shouldn't  be 
crying. 

Mitya.  Will  you  permit  me  to  speak,  Pelageya  Egorovna  ? 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Speak ! 

Mitya.  This  is  what  I  have  to  say:  Get  her  ready  and 
put  on  her  warm  clothes.  Let  her  slip  out  quietly;  I'll  seat 
her  in  my  fairy  sleigh,  and  that's  the  last  of  us.  Then  the 
old  man  will  never  see  her  any  more  than  his  own  ears ! 
And  no  matter  if  I  do  go  to  ruin !  I  will  take  her  to  my 
mother  and  there  we  will  get  married.  Oh,  just  give  us 
a  chance !  I  want  some  joy  in  life !  At  any  rate,  if  I 
have  to  pay  the  price,  at  least  I  shall  know  that  I've  really 
lived. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  What  do  you  mean?  What  do 
you  mean,  you  scamp.'' 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  What  an  idea,  Mitya ! 

Mitya.  So  you  don't  love  me?  Or  have  you  ceased  to 
love  me? 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  What  you  say  is  dreadful ! 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  What  an  idea,  you  scamp !  Who 
would  dare  to  take  such  a  sin  on  his  soul  ?  Yes,  come  to 
your  senses  !     What  are  you  thinking  of  ? 

Mitya.  Why,  I  said  if  you're  sorry !  But  if  you're  not 
sorry — then  give  her  to  Afrikan  Savvich;  sell  her  into 
slavery   forever   and   ever.     You'll  be  miserable  yourselves 


SCENE  VI       POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  119 

when  you  see  her  wretched  life;  you'll  come  to  your  senses, 
you  and  Gordey  Karpych,  but  then  it  will  be  too  late. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  But  how  could  you,  without  her 
father's  blessing  ?     How  could  you  ?     Judge  for  yourself  ! 

MiTYA.  Certainly,  how  could  we  live  without  a  blessing ! 
Then  you  bless  us,  Pelageya  Egorovna.  [Kneels  down]  and 
Gordey  Karpych,  it  may  be — himself,  in  time — somehow 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  What  can  I  say  to  you?  I  feel 
altogether  distracted. —  Yes,  I'm  going  out  of  my  mind  !  I 
don't  know  anything !  I  don't  remember  anything !  Yes, 
yes,  my  head  spins.     Oh,  my  darlings,  my  heart  is  torn ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Goes  to  Mitya]  No,  Mitya,  this 
can't  be!  Don't  torture  yourself  for  nothing;  stop  !  [Raises 
him  up]  Don't  tear  my  soul !  Already  my  heart  is  all 
withered  away  within  me!     God  be  with  you;  good-by ! 

Mitya.  Why  did  you  deceive  me  and  mock  at  me.'* 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Don't,  Mitya !  Why  should  I  de- 
ceive you?  Why?  I  fell  in  love  with  j^ou;  so  I  told  you, 
myself.  But  now  we  must  not  go  against  the  will  of  our 
parents.  For  it  is  the  will  of  my  father  that  I  should  marry; 
I  must  submit  to  him — that  is  a  girl's  lot.  It  must  be  that 
that's  the  right  thing  since  it  was  so  ordained  of  old.  I 
don't  want  to  go  against  my  father;  I  don't  wish  people  to 
talk  about  me  and  make  an  example  of  me.  Although  it 
may  be  I  have  broken  my  heart  because  of  this — at  any  rate 
I  know  that  I  am  acting  according  to  law;  no  one  will  dare 
to  look  me  in  the  face  and  jeer.     Good-by  !  [They  kiss. 

Mitya.  Well,  now  I  know  my  fate !  [Lyubov  Gordeyevna 
seats  herself  on  the  sofa  and  weeps]  Good-by !  [Boivs  to  Pela- 
geya Egorovna]  Good-by,  Pelageya  Egorovna,  you  have 
been  my  benefactress !  So  long  as  I  live  I  shall  not  forget 
your  goodness  and  kindness  to  me;  you  did  not  forget  the 
orphan  in  a  strange  land. 


1^20  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  m 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Goo(l-hy,  my  dear;    do  not  blame 
us  in  any  way — that  would  be  a  sin  for  you.     God  grant  that 
you  may  live  happily;    we  shall  not  forget  you. 
MiTYA  bows  and  goes  out. 

SCENE    VII 

Pelageya  Egorovna,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna  and    later 

KORSHUNOV. 

PeIjAGEYA  Egorovna.  How  I  pity  that  boy,  Lyubov  dear ! 
Oh,  my  child,  oh,  dear !  It  never  entered  my  head  that  you 
loved  him.  How  could  I  guess  it,  poor  old  woman  that  I 
am  !  What  do  I  amount  to  ?  There,  crying  is  our  business, 
and  I  haven't  any  authority  over  my  daughter!  But  it 
would  be  a  good  idea !  I'd  enjoy  the  sight  of  you  in  my  old 
age.  The  boy  is  such  an  honest  fellow,  with  such  a  tender 
heart,  and  he  would  be  fond  of  me  in  my  old  age.  And  as 
I  look  at  you,  my  child,  how  can  you  help  being  sad  .'*  And 
I  have  no  way  to  help  you,  my  darling ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Well,  mother,  what's  the  use  of 
thinking  about  what's  impossible,  and  only  torturing  our- 
selves ? 

Seats  herself  and  is  silent;  some  one  knocks;  the  voice 
of  KoRSHUNOV  is  heard,  "May  I  come  in?" 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Come  in,  sir. 

KoRSHUNOV.  [Entering]  Ah,  there  she  is,  my  bride ! 
Where  were  you  hiding  yourself.'*  He,  he!  I'll  find  you, 
I'll  find  you  anywhere.  If  you  please,  Pelageya  Egorovna, 
permit  me  to  talk  confidentially  with  your  daughter  about 
our  own  affairs. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Certainly.  [Goes  out. 

KoRSHUNOV.  [Seats  himself  near  Lyubov  Gordeyevna] 
What  are  you  crying  about,  young  lady  ?     For  shame,  for 


SCENE  VII       POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  Ul 

shame !  He,  he,  he !  There !  I'm  older  than  you,  and  I 
don't  cry.  [Looks  at  her  searchingly]  Oh,  well,  I  know  what 
it's  about !  I  suppose  you  want  to  marry  a  young  fellow  ? 
Now,  this,  my  pretty  one  [takes  her  hand  and  kisses  it]  is  just 
girlish  folly.  Now,  just  listen  to  what  I'm  going  to  tell  you; 
I'll  tell  you  the  truth  straight  out.  I  don't  like  to  deceive 
any  one,  and  have  no  need  to.     Will  you  listen,  eh  ? 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Yes. 

KoRSHUNOV.  Good !  Now,  we'll  begin  with  this  point. 
Will  a  young  man  appreciate  your  love  ?  Any  girl  will  love 
a  young  man;  that  is  nothing  unusual  for  him;  but  to  an 
old  man  it  is  precious.  An  old  man  will  reward  you  for  your 
love  with  some  little  gift,  this  and  that — with  gold,  and 
with  velvet — and  there's  nothing  he  won't  give  you.  [Kisses 
her  hand]  And  in  Moscow  there  are  lots  of  nice  things  in  the 
shops;  there  are  things  worth  giving!  So  it's  nice  to  fall 
in  love  with  an  old  man.  That's  number  one  for  you  !  And 
then  this  is  what  happens  with  a  young  and  good-looking 
husband.  You  see  they  are  a  fickle  lot !  Before  you  know 
it  he  will  be  running  after  some  one  else,  or  some  young  lady 
will  fall  in  love  with  him,  and  then  his  wife  may  pine  away. 
Then  come  reproaches  and  jealousy.  And  what  is  this 
jealousy,  eh  ?  He,  he,  he !  Do  you  know,  young  lady, 
what  this  jealousy  is.f* 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  No,  I  don't  know, 

KoRSHUNOV.  But  I  know  !  It  isn't  like  a  needle  prick  in 
the  finger;  it's  far  more  painful  than  that.  You  see  the 
cursed  thing  consumes  a  man.  From  jealousy  people  stab 
one  another,  and  poison  one  another  with  arsenic !  [Laiu/hs 
spasmodically  and  coughs]  But  when  any  one  falls  in  love 
with  an  old  man,  then  all  is  peaceful  for  his  wife.  And  here's 
something  else  I  will  tell  you,  my  dear  young  lady:  Young 
men  like  to  go  on  sprees;    they  like  gayety  and  distraction. 


12^2  POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  act  m 

and  all  sorts  of  dissipations,  and  their  wives  may  sit  at  home 
and  wait  for  them  till  midnight.  And  they  come  home 
drunk,  and  bully  their  wives,  and  swagger.  But  an  old  man 
will  just  sit  near  his  wife;  he'll  die  before  he'll  leave  her. 
And  he  would  like  to  look  into  her  eyes  all  the  time  and  to 
caress  her  and  to  kiss  her  hands.  [Kisses  them]  Just  like  that. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Did  your  deceased  wife  love  you  ? 

KoRSHUNOV.  [Looks  at  her  attentively]  And  why  do  you 
ask  this,  young  lady  ? 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  I  just  wanted  to  know. 

KoRSHUNOV.  You  wanted  to  know  ?  [Rises]  No,  she  didn't 
love  me,  and  I  didn't  love  her  either.  She  wasn't  worth 
loving — I  took  her,  poor,  a  beggar,  just  for  her  beauty;  I 
took  care  of  her  whole  family;  I  saved  her  father  from  prison; 
she  went  about  in  gold. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Love  cannot  be  bought  with  gold. 

KoRSHUNOV.  Whether  you  love  a  man  or  not,  you  ought 
to  show  liim  some  regard.  They  needed  money,  they  had 
nothing  to  live  on;  I  gave  it  to  them,  I  didn't  refuse.  And 
/  needed  their  love.  Had  I  a  right  to  exact  this  or  not.-* 
You  see  I  paid  money  for  it !  It's  a  sin  to  make  com- 
plaints about  me.  Whoever  I  love  has  a  good  living  in  the 
world,  and  if  I  don't  love  any  one,  then  he  need  not  re- 
proach me.  [He  becomes  excited  and  walks  about]  Yes,  I'm 
that  man's  enemy;  he'd  better  keep  out  of  my  sight!  My 
words  and  looks,  more  than  my  deeds,  shall  pursue  him  !  I 
won't  give  the  man  room  to  breathe !  I —  [Stops  and  bursts 
out  laughing]  And  you  really  thought  that  I  was  such  a  cross 
man  .'*  He,  he !  I  said  it  in  fun,  for  a  joke !  I'm  a  simple, 
kind  old  man!  I'll  dandle  you  in  my  arms  [hums];  I'll  rock 
you  in  a  little  cradle;  I'll  sing  you  to  sleep.  [Kisses  her  hands. 
GoRDEY  Karpych  comes  in. 


SCENE  VIII       POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME         123 


SCENE    VIII 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  Korshunov,  and  Gordey  Karpych 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Ah,  so  that's  where  mj^  son-in-law  is ! 
We've  been  looking  for  you.  We've  already  started  in  on 
the  champagne.  Come  along  to  the  guests;  at  our  house  a 
feast  isn't  a  feast  without  you. 

Korshunov.  I  like  it  here. 

Gordey  Karpych.  Then  we'll  order  it  to  be  served  here, 
and  we'll  drink  it  with  you.  [Walks  to  the  door]  Hey,  boy, 
serve  the  wine  here !  On  a  silver  tray !  [Sits  down]  Now, 
son-in-law,  what  do  you  say? 

Korshunov.  Nothing. 

Gordey  Karpych.  How,  nothing? 

Korshunov.  Just  nothing. 

Gordey  Karpych.  But  don't  you  really?  [Looks  at  him] 
Can  you  understand  me  now  ? 

Korshunov.  Why  shouldn't  I  understand  you? 

Gordey  Karpych.  Now  we've  had  this  little  spree !  So 
now  you  tell  me,  what  sort  of  a  man  I  am.  Can  they  appre- 
ciate me  here? 

Korshunov.  Why  should  they  appreciate  you? 

Gordey  Karpych.  No,  tell  me  this:  Isn't  everything  well 
done  here?  In  other  houses  a  young  fellow  waits  at  table 
in  a  Russian  smock,  or  there's  a  peasant  girl;  but  in  my 
house  there's  a  butler  in  cotton  gloves.  This  butler  is  a 
trained  man,  from  IVIoscow;  he  knows  all  the  ways  of  society 
— where  each  man  should  be  seated,  and  what's  to  be  done. 
But  how  is  it  at  other  people's  houses  ?  They  collect  in  one 
room,  they  sit  down  in  a  ring,  and  sing  peasant  songs.  Of 
course  it's  jolly,  but  I  consider  it's  vulgar;  there's  no  style 
about  it.     And   what  do  they  drink  in   their  boorishness? 


1^24  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIMP]  act  in 

Home-niado  corflials,  all  sorts  of  cherry  water !  And  they 
don't  even  k-noir  that  champagne  is  the  proper  thing !  Oh, 
if  I  could  live  in  Moscow,  or  in  Petersburg,  I'd  make  a  point 
of  following  every  fashion. 

KoRSHUNOV.  You  don't  mean  every  fashion  ? 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Every  one.  As  long  as  my  money 
held  out,  I  wouldn't  stint  myself.  You  just  look  out,  Lyubov; 
you  toe  the  mark !  Or  else  your  bridegroom — you  see  he's 
from  Moscow — may  be  ashamed  of  you.  I  suppose  you 
don't  even  know  how  to  walk  gracefully,  and  you  don't 
understand  how  to  talk  as  is  proper  in  company. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  I  say  what  I  feel,  father;  I  wasn't 
brought  up  in  a  boarding-school. 

The  butler  enters,  and  gives  wine  to  Korshunov  and 
GoRDEY  KL\RPYCH.  Hc  places  the  bottles  on  the  table, 
and  goes  out. 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  That's  it,  son-in-law !     Just  let  them 
know  what  sort  of  man  Gordey  Karpych  Tortsov  is ! 
Egorushka  comes  in. 

Egorushka.  Uncle  Gordey  Karpych,  come  here,  if  you 
please. 

Gordey  Karpych.  What's  the  matter  with  you .' 

Egorushka.  Come,  please :  there's  such  a  scene  !     [Laughs. 

Gordey  Karpych.  [Approaching]  What's  the  matter.^ 

Egorushka.  Uncle  Lyubim  Karpych  has  come  in. 

Gordey  Karpych.  Why  did  they  let  him  in  ? 

Egorushka.  It  must  be  that  he  just  took  it  into  his  head; 
we  can't  stop  him,  anyhow.  [Bursts  out  laughing. 

Gordey  Karpych.  What's  he  doing  ? 

Egorushka.  He's  turning  out  the  guests.  [Bursts  out 
laughing]  "You're  glad  to  eat  another  man's  bread,"  says 

he.     "I'm  also  the  host,"  says  he.     "I,"  says  he 

[Bursts  out  laughing. 


SCENE  X        POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  125 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Sli — he's  ruined  me  ! 

[Goes  out  with  Egobushka. 
KoRSHUNOv.  What's  all  this  about? 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  I  don't  know.  It  must  be  that 
uncle  is —     Sometimes  he  takes  a  notion. 

Enter  Razlyulyayev,  Masha,  and  Liza. 

SCENE    IX 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  Korshunov,  Razlyulyayev,  Masha, 
and  Liza. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  [At  the  door]  Where  is  your  brother  ? 
Where  is  Lyubim  Karpych  ?  What  has  he  done  ?  Oh, 
misery ! 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  He  isn't  here,  mother. 

Pelageya  Egorovna  goes  out. 
Razlyulyayev.  There    you    are !     Lyubim    Karpych    is 
playing  some  famous  tricks !     Ha,  ha,  ha !     He's  cutting  up 
such  capers,  it  beats  all ! 

Liza.  It  isn't  at  all  funny,  it's  just  rude ! 
Masha.  I  simply  didn't  know  what  to  do  from  embarrass- 
ment. 

They  seat  themselves  on  the  sofa.     Lyubim  Karpych 
comes  in. 

SCENE    X 

The  same  and  Lyubim  Karpych 

Liza.  Oh,  good  heavens,  again ! 
Masha.  This  is  terrible  ! 
Razlyulyayev.  Ha,  ha,  ha ! 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Gurr,  gurr,  gurr;  bul,  bul,  bul !  With 
the    finger    nine !     With    the    cucumber    fifteen !     How    do. 


126  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  m 

friend !  [Holds  out  his  hand  to  Korshunov]  My  respects ! 
I  haven't  seen  you  for  a  thousand  years  and  a  tlay !  How 
are  you  ? 

Korshunov.  Oh,  is  this  you,  Lyuhim? 

Lyubim  Karpych.  [Covering  hi.s  face  ivith  his  hands]  I'm 
not  I,  and  the  horse  is  not  mine,  and  I'm  not  a  coachman. 

Korshunov.  I  remember  you,  brother !  You  used  to 
roam  the  town  and  pick  up  kopeks. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  You  remember  how  I  used  to  pick  up 
kopeks,  but  do  you  remember  how  you  and  I  used  to  go  on 
sprees  together.^  How  we  sat  througli  the  dark  autumn 
nights,  and  how  we  skipped  back  and  forth,  from  the  tavern 
to  the  wine-shop  ?  And  don't  you  know  who  ruined  me,  and 
who  turned  me  out  with  a  beggar's  wallet  .f* 

Korshunov.  Why  didn't  you  look  out  for  yourself  .'* 
Nobody  dragged  you  in  by  the  collar,  my  dear  fellow.  It's 
your  own  fault. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  I  was  a  fool !  But,  well,  you  haven't 
much  to  be  proud  of !  You  raised  me  to  such  heights,  you 
promoted  me  to  such  a  place — ^I've  stolen  nothing,  and  yet 
I'm  ashamed  to  look  men  in  the  eyes ! 

Korshunov.  You're  the  same  old  joker  as  ever!  [Turning 
to  Lyubov  Gordeyevna]  You've  got  a  jolly  uncle !  For 
old  acquaintance  sake,  we'll  surely  have  to  give  him  a  ruble. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Sh !  It's  not  a  question  of  rubles 
here !  Pay  up  your  old  debts,  and  for  my  niece  here  a  mil- 
lion three  hundred  thousand  !     I  won't  sell  her  cheaper. 

Korshunov.  [Laughiyig]  Won't  you  come  down  ? 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Not  a  kopek  ! 

Razlyulyayev.  Aha,  Lyubim  Karpych !  Don't  you  take 
any  less ! 

GORDEY  K.\RPYCH  COMBS  in. 


SCENE  XI       POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  127 

SCENE    XI 

The  same  loith  Gordey  Karpych 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  So  you  arc  here !  What  are  you 
doing  in  my  house  ?     Clear  out ! 

KoRSHUNOV.  Wait  a  bit,  Gordey  Karpych;  don't  turn 
him  out !  Why  turn  him  out  ?  Let  him  show  off  and  make 
jokes.     He,  he,  he  ! 

Lyubim  Karpych.  It's  my  brother  that's  joking,  in  giving 
his  daughter  to  you,  but  I'll  play  such  a  joke  on  you  as  won't 
suit  your  stomach ! 

Gordey  Karpych.  Tliis  isn't  the  place  for  him.  Get 
out! 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Wait,  brother,  don't  turn  me  out ! 
Do  you  think  Lyubim  Tortsov  has  come  to  make  jokes  .'* 
Do  you  tliink  Lyubim  Tortsov  is  drunk?  I  have  come  to 
you  to  ask  riddles.  [To  Korshunov]  Why  has  an  ass  long 
ears.''     Now,  then,  give  us  an  answer? 

Razlyulyayev.  That's  a  hard  one ! 

Korshunov.  How  do  I  know  ? 

Lyubim  K.\rpych.  So  that  all  may  know  that  he  is  an 
ass.  [  To  his  brother]  Here's  a  riddle  for  you !  To  whom  are 
you  marrying  your  daughter? 

Gordey  K.arpych.  That's  not  your  affair !  You've  no 
business  to  ask  me. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  And  here's  another  question  for  you. 
Are  you  an  honest  merchant,  or  not?  If  you  are  honest, 
don't  associate  with  a  dishonest  one.  You  can't  touch  soot 
and  not  be  defiled. 

Korshunov.  Joke  away — but  don't  forget  yourself,  my 
dear  fellow !     Turn  him  out,  or  make  him  keep  quiet. 


128  POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  act  m 

Lyubim  Karpych.  That  meant  yt)u  !  One  can  see  you 
are  as  dean  as  a  chimney-sweep ! 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Brother,  go  away  quietly,  or  it  will 
be  the  worse  for  you. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  [Starting  up  in  a  fright]  Uncle, 
stop ! 

Lyubim  Karpych.  I  won't  be  quiet !  Now  blood  has 
begun  to  talk ! 

All  the  domestics  and  guests  enter. 

SCENE    XII 

The  same  with  Pelageya  Egorovna,  Anna  Ivanovna,  Gus- 
LiN,  guests,  and  servants. 

Lytjbim  Karpych.  Listen,  good  people  !  They  are  insult- 
ing Lyubim  Tortsov,  they  are  driving  him  away.  But  am 
I  not  a  guest  too?  Why  should  they  drive  me  away.^  My 
clothes  are  not  clean,  but  I  have  a  clean  conscience !  I'm 
not  Korshunov;  I  didn't  rob  the  poor,  I  didn't  ruin  another's 
life,  I  didn't  torment  my  wife  with  jealousy.  Me  they  drive 
away,  but  he's  their  most  esteemed  guest,  and  he's  put  in 
the  place  of  honor.  Well,  never  mind  !  They'll  give  him 
another  wife.  My  brother  is  marrying  his  daughter  to  him  ! 
Ha,  ha,  ha  !  [Laughs  tragically. 

Korshunov.  [Jumps  up]  Don't  believe  him;  he  lies! 
He  says  this  out  of  spite  to  me.     He's  drunk ! 

Lyubim  Karpych.  How  out  of  spite?  I  pardoned  you 
long  ago.  Fm  a  man  of  small  account,  a  crawling  worm, 
the  lowest  of  the  low !     But  don't  you  do  evil  to  others. 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  [To  the  servants]  Take  him  away! 

Lyubim  Karpych.  [Holding  up  one  finger]  Sh,  don't  touch 
me !  It's  an  easy  life  in  this  world  for  a  man  whose  eyes 
are  shameless  !    Oh,  men,  men  !     Lyubim  Tortsov  is  a  drunk- 


SCENE  xui       POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME         129 

ard,  but  he's  better  than  you  !  Here,  now,  I'll  go  away  of 
my  own  accord.  [Turning  to  the  croird]  IVIake  way — Lyubim 
Tortsov  is  going  !  [Goes,  and  suddenly  turns  round]  Unnatural 
monster !  [Goes  out. 

KoRSHUNOV.  [Laughing  in  a  forced  way]  So  that's  the  way 
you  keep  order  in  your  house !  That's  how  you  follow  the 
fashions !  At  your  house  drunkards  insult  the  guests  !  He, 
he,  he!  "I,"  says  he,  "shall  go  to  Moscow;  here  they  don't 
understand  me!"  Such  fools  are  almost  extinct  in  Mos- 
cow !  They  laugh  at  'em  there  !  "Son-in-law,  son-in-law  !" 
He,  he,  he!  "Dear  father-in-law!"  No,  humbug,  I  won't 
let  myself  be  insulted  for  nothing.  No,  you  come  along  and 
bow  down  to  me !     Beg  me  to  take  your  daughter ! 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  You  think  I'll  bow  down  to  you  ? 

KoRSHUNOV.  Yes,  you  will ;  I  know  you !  You  want  a 
fine  wedding.  You'd  hang  yourself  if  only  to  astonish  the 
town !  But  nobody  wants  her !  How  unlucky  for  you ! 
He,  he  he ! 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  After  you've  said  such  words  as  these 
I  won't  have  anything  more  to  do  with  you  !  I  never  bowed 
down  to  any  one  in  my  life !  If  it  comes  to  this,  I'll  marry 
her  to  any  man  I  choose.  With  the  money  that  I  shall  give 
as  her  dowry  any  man  will — — 

Mitya  comes  in,  and  stops  in  the  doorway. 

SCENE    XIII 
The  same  and  Mitya 

Mitya.  [Turning  towards  the  crowd]  What's  all  this  noise .^ 
GoRDEY  Karpych.  Here,  I'll  marry  her  to  Mitya ! 
Mitya.  What,  sir.^ 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Silence!  Yes — I'll  marry  her  to 
Mitya — to-morrow !     And  I'll  give  her  such  a  wedding  as 


180  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  m 

you  never  saw  !     I'll  get  musicians  from  Moscow  !     I'll  ride 
alone  in  four  coaches  ! 

KoRSHUNOv.  We'll  see,  we'll  see  !  You'll  come  to  ask  my 
pardon,  you  will !  [Goes  out. 

SCENE    XIV 

The  same  without  Korshunov 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  To  whom,  Gordey  Karpych,  did 
you  say? 

Gordey  Karpych.  To  Mitya —  Yes  !  What  airs  he  put 
on!  As  if  I  were  worse  than  he!  "You'll  come  and  bow- 
down!"  He  Hes !  I  won't  go  and  bow  down!  Just  to 
spite  him  I'll   marry  her  to  Dmitry.     [All  are  astonished. 

Mitya.  [Takes  Lyubov  Gordeyevtsta  by  the  hand  and  goes 
to  Gordey  Karpych]  Why  out  of  spite,  Gordey  Karpych? 
One  does  not  do  such  tilings  out  of  spite.  I  don't  want  you 
to  do  it  out  of  spite.  I'd  rather  suffer  torment  all  my  life. 
If  you  are  kind  enough,  then  give  us  your  blessing  as  is 
proper,  in  a  fatherly  fashion,  with  love.  Because  we  love 
each  other,  and  even  before  tliis  happened,  we  wanted  to 
confess  our  guilt  to  you.  And  now  I'll  be  a  true  son  to 
you  forever,  with  all  my  heart. 

Gordey  Karpych.  W'hat,  what,  "with  all  your  heart"? 
You're  glad  of  the  chance !  But  how  did  you  ever  dare  to 
think  of  it  ?  Is  she  your  equal  ?  Remember  to  whom  you're 
talking. 

Mitya.  I  know  very  well  that  you  are  mj'  master,  and 
that  I,  because  of  my  poverty,  cannot  be  her  equal;  but 
however,  think  as  you  please.  Here  I  am;  I've  fallen  in 
love  with  your  daughter  with  all  my  heart  and  soul. 

Lyubim  Karpych  comes  in  and  takes  his  stand  in  the 
croivd. 


SCENE XV       POVERTY  IS  NO  CRIME  131 

SCENE    XV 

The  same  and  Lyubim  Karpych 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  Well,  how  could  you  help  loving  her  ? 
Your  taste  isn't  bad !  And  you'll  get  plenty  of  money  with 
her,  which  is  fine  for  a  penniless  fellow  like  you — without  a 
rag  to  your  back  ! 

MiTYA.  It  is  so  insulting  for  me  to  hear  this  from  you, 
that  I  have  no  words.  Better  keep  silent.  [Walks  away]  If 
you  please,  Lyubov  Gordeyevna,  you  speak. 

Lyubov  Gordeyevna.  Father,  I  have  never  gone  against 
your  will !  If  you  wish  for  my  happiness,  then  give  me  to 
Mitya. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Why,  why,  really,  Gordey  Karpych, 
why  do  you  keep  changing  your  mind  so  ?  Why  do  you  ? 
I  was  beginning  to  feel  happy;  my  heart  was  just  beginning 
to  feel  easy,  and  now  you  begin  again.  Do  stick  to  some- 
thing; otherwise  what  does  all  this  mean?  Really!  First 
you  say  to  one  man,  and  then  to  the  other !  Was  she  born 
your  daughter  just  to  be  a  martyr? 

Lyubim  Karpych.  [From  the  croivd\  Brother,  give  Lyubov 
to  Mitya ! 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  You  here  again !  Do  you  understand 
what  you've  done  to  me  to-day?  You've  put  me  to  shame 
before  the  whole  town !  If  you  felt  this  you  wouldn't  dare 
to  show  yourself  in  my  sight — and  then  you  slink  in  and  give 
me  advice !     If  it  were  only  a  man  talking  and  not  you. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  You'd  better  bow  down  to  Lyubim 
Tortsov's  feet,  just  because  he  has  put  you  to  shame. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  That's  it,  dear  Lyubim  !  We  ought 
to  bow  down  to  your  feet;  that's  just  it !  You  have  taken  a 
great  sin  from  our  souls;  all  our  prayers  could  never  have 
freed  us  from  this  sin. 


132  POVERTY  IS   NO   CRIME  act  m 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  What,  am  I  a  monster  to  my  own 
family  ? 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  You're  no  monster,  but  you  would 
have  ruined  your  daughter  through  your  own  folly;  I  tell 
you  this  straight  out !  They  marry  girls  to  old  men  who  are 
a  lot  better  than  Afrikan  Savvich,  and  even  so  they  live 
miserable  lives. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Permit  me !  [Sjng'*]  Tum-ty-tum,  tum- 
ty-tum !  [Dances]  Look  at  me,  here's  an  example  for  you  ! 
Lyubim  Karpych  stands  before  you  large  as  life !  He  went 
along  that  road,  he  knows  what  it  is !  And  I  was  rich  and 
respected,  I  drove  about  in  coaches,  I  played  such  pranks 
as  would  never  come  into  your  head;  and  then  head  over 
heels  down.     Just  see  what  a  dandy  I  am ! 

GoRDEY  Karpych.  No  matter  what  you  say  to  me,  I  don't 
want  to  listen;    you  are  my  enemy  for  the  rest  of  my  life. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Are  you  a  man,  or  a  wild  beast  ?  Have 
pity  on  Lyubim  Tortsov !  [Kneels  doivn]  Brother,  give  Lyu- 
bov  to  Mitya — he  will  give  me  a  corner.  I  was  chilled  and 
hungry.  I  was  growing  old,  and  it  was  hard  for  me  to 
play  the  fool  in  the  cold  for  a  piece  of  bread ;  at  least  in  one's 
old  age  one  wants  to  live  decently.  You  see  I've  been 
cheating  people,  I've  been  begging  alms,  and  have  spent  it 
in  drink.  They'll  give  me  work,  and  then  I'll  have  my 
kettle  of  soup.  Then  I'll  thank  God,  brother;  even  my 
tears  will  reach  to  heaven.  What  if  he  is  poor,  eh  .'*  If  I  had 
been  poor,  I  should  have  been  a  man.     Poverty  is  no  crime. 

Pelageya  Egorovna.  Gordey  Karpych,  haven't  you  any 
feelings  ? 

Gordey  Karpych.  [Wiping  away  a  tear]  And  you  really 
thought  that  I  hadn't?  [Lifts  up  his  brother]  Well,  brother, 
thank  you  for  bringing  me  back  to  reason;  I  almost  went 
out  of  my  mind  completely.     I  don't  know  how  such  a  rotten 


SCENE XV        POVERTY   IS   NO   CRIME  133 

notion  got  into  my  head.  [Embraces  Mitya  and  Lyubov 
Gordeyevna]  Now,  children,  say  thank  you  to  your  Uncle 
Lyubim  Karpych,  and  live  in  happiness. 

Pelageya  Egoro\'na  embraces  the  children. 

GusLlN.  Uncle,  may  I  speak  now  ? 

Gordey  Karpych.  You  may,  you  may !  Ask  for  what- 
ever you  want,  every  one  of  you !  Now  I  have  become  an- 
other man. 

GusLiN.  Well,  Annushka,  it's  our  turn  now ! 

Anna  Ivanovna.  Well,  now,  we'll  have  a  dance;  only  hold 
your  hat  on ! 

Pelageya  Egorov'na.  Yes,  let's  dance,  let's  dance ! 

Razlyulyay'EV.  [Goes  to  Mitya  and  slaps  him  on  the  shoul- 
der] Mitya !  For  a  friend  I  give  up  everything !  I  loved 
her  myself,  but  for  you — I  give  her  up.  Give  me  your  hand. 
[Clasps  his  hand]  That's  all — take  her;  I  give  her  up  to 
you !  For  a  friend  I  don't  regret  anything !  That's  the 
way  we  do  it  when  it  comes  to  the  point !  [Wipes  away  his 
tears  with  the  lappet  of  his  coat  and  kisses  Mitya]  He  told 
the  truth  then;  drunkenness  is  no  crime — well,  I  mean — 
poverty  is  no  crime.     I  always  make  slips ! 

Pelageya  Egoro\^'a.  Oh,  yes,  here  they  all  are!  [To  the 
girls]  Now,  then,  girls,  a  jolly  song  !  Yes,  a  jolly  one  !  Now 
we'll  celebrate  the  wedding  with  all  our  hearts  !  With  all 
our  hearts  !  [  The  girls  begin  to  sing. 

Lyubim  Karpych.  Sh  !     Obey  orders ! 
He  sings;  the  girls  join  in. 

"We  have  done  the  business; 
All  the  trade  is  driven. 
The  betrothal  we  will  plight. 
And  upon  the  wedding  night 
A  fine  feast  shall  be  given." 


SIN    AND    SORROW    ARE 
COMMON    TO    ALL 


A    DRAMA    IN    FOUR    ACTS 


CHARACTERS 

Valentin  Pavlych  Babayev,'  a  young  landowner 

Lev  Rodionych  Krasnov,  a  shopkeeper,  about  thirty  years 

of  age 
Tatyana  DanIlovna  {called  Tanya),  his  tvife 
LuKERYA  DanIlovna  Zhmigulin  {called  Lush  a),  her  sister, 

an  old  maid  and  daughter  of  a  government  clerk  now  dead 
Arkhip,  blind  old  man,  grandfather  of  Krasnov 
Afonya  (Afanasy),  invalid  boy  about  eighteen  years  of  age, 

brother  of  Krasnov 
Manuylo  KALiNYCH  KuRiTSYN,  flour  dealer  about  forty-five 

years  of  age 
Ulyana  Rodionovna  Kuritsyn,  his  wife,  sister  of  Krasnov 
Shishgalev,  government  clerk 
Zaychikha  (called  Prokofyevna),  landlady  of  the  lodgings 

taken  by  Babayev 
Karp,  Babayev's  attendant 

The  action  takes  place  in  a  district  town. 

I  Womanish. 


SIN    AND    SORROW    ARE 
COMMON    TO    ALL 

ACT   I 

TABLEAU    I 

A  room,  cheaply  papered,  shabhihj  furnished ;  in  the  rear  two 
doors,  one  opening  on  the  street,  the  other  leading  into  an 
adjoining  room;  the  tcindoics  are  hung  with  chintz  cur- 
tains. 

SCENE    I 

Kabp  is  unfastening  a  valise,  and  Zaychikha  (Prokofyevna) 
is  looking  out  of  the  window. 

Prokofyevna,  Just  look,  dear  sir,  how  many  people  liave 
gathered. 

Karp.  What  do  they  want?     Why  are  they  curious? 

Prokofyevna.  Every  one,  dear  sir,  wishes  to  know  who 
it  is  that  has  arrived. 

Karp.  They  say  you're  provincials,  and  you  certainly  are 
provincials.  Well,  tell  them  that  it's  Babajev,  Valentin 
Pavlych,  a  landowner. 

Prokofyevna.  [Speaking  throvgh  the  windoni]  Babayev,  a 
landowner.  [To  Karp]  They're  asking  why  you  came. 

Karp.  On  business,  of  course.  Did  you  think  we  came 
here  for  sport?     Much  chance  there  would  l)e  for  ihat  here. 

Prokofyevna.  [Through  the  windoiv]  For  business.  [To 
Karp]  Will  you  remain  long? 

137 


138  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  i 

Karp.  We  certainly  haven't  come  to  settle  here.  We 
may  stay  two  days;  not  longer,  you  may  be  sure. 

Prokofyevna.  [Through  the  witidou']  For  two  days.  [With- 
draws from  the  ivindoui]  Now  I've  satisfied  them.  In  five 
minutes  the  entire  city  will  know. 

Karp.  Your  lodging  is  all  right;  it's  clean. 
•    Prokofyevna.  Certainly  it's  clean,  sir.   No  great  frills,  but 
it's  clean.     Of  course  there's  no  great  travelling  to  our  town. 

Karp.  It  isn't  on  the  highway. 

Prokofyevna.  Highway,  not  mucli !  Yet  the  best  people 
that  do  come  here,  lodge  with  me.  I  know  a  lot  of  the  land- 
owners who  come  here.  They  are  used  to  me;  very  few  of 
them  ever  go  to  the  hotel. 

Karp.  Because  it's  so  noisy. 

Prokofyevna.  Yes,  I  should  say  so !  Down-stairs  is  a 
bar-room;  and  on  market  days  the  noise  is  dreadful.  Please 
tell  me,  wasn't  your  master's  mother  Sofya  Pavlovna,  the 
wife  of  General  Babayev.'' 

Karp.  Exactly  so. 

Prokofyevna.  Is  their  estate  called  Zavetnoye? 

Karp.  Yes. 

Prokofyevna.  So,  so.  I  recognized  liim  just  now.  I  used 
to  see  him  as  a  youngster.  He  often  rode  to  town  with  his 
mother,  and  they  would  call  on  me.  Does  he  live  in  the 
country  ? 

Karp.  No,  we  are  most  of  the  time  in  St.  Petersburg;  but 
now  we  have  come  to  the  country  to  arrange  business  matters. 

Prokofyevna.  So,  so.  But  is  he  a  good  man  to  deal 
with  ? 

Karp.  Pretty  good. 

Prokofyevna.  Well,  thank  the  Lord !  May  He  reward 
him !     What  business  brought  you  to  our  town  ? 

Karp.  Oh,  those  endless  legal  matters.     Petty  business. 


SCENE  II  SIN   AND   SORROW  139 

something  to  bear  witness  to;  hut  I  suppose  he'll  waste  five 
days  over  it. 

Prokofyevna.  It  wouldn't  be  surprising.  Have  you  called 
on  the  judges  ? 

Karp.  Yes,  we  called  on  them  all.  Just  now  they  sent 
us  a  clerk  from  court. 

Prokofyevna.  They'll  probably  do  it  quicker  for  you  than 
for  us.  If  you  need  anything,  knock  on  the  wall,  and  I'll 
come.  [Goes  out. 

Babayev  and  Shishgalev  enter  at  the  side  door. 


SCENE    II 

Babayev,  Shishgalev,  and  Karp 

Babayev.  So  you  say,  my  dear  sir,  that  it  is  absolutely 
impossible  ? 

Shishgalev.  [Boiving  and  continually  blmcing  his  nose  and 
covering  his  mouth  tvith  his  hand]  But,  believe  me,  sir,  if  it 
were  at  all  possible  we  should  have 

Babayev.  Maybe  it  is  possible.-^ 

Shishgalev.  Judge  for  yourself,  sir.  Now  the  court  ses- 
sion has  ended,  it  is  quite  impossible  to  assemble  the  mem- 
bers ;  to-morrow  is  a  holiday — then  comes  Saturday  and  then 
Sunday. 

Babayev.  Just  think,  my  dear  sir,  how  you  are  treating 
me ! 

Shishgalev.  How  am  I  to  blame?  I'm  the  humblest 
sort  of  man. 

Babayev.  But,  my  dear  sir,  what  shall  I  do  here  for  the 
next  four  days  ?     It  is  dreadful ! 

Shishgalev.  You  can  look  around,  sir,  and  take  a  glance 
at  our  city. 


140  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  i 

Karp.  What's  the  use  of  looking  at  it?  Wliat  is  there  to 
see  here  ?  I  suppose  j^ou'll  say  that  St.  Petersburg  is  not  as 
fine  a  city  as  yours. 

Babayev.  Have  you  any  kind  of  social  life.'' 

Shishgalev.  I  beg  pardon,  sir? 

Babayev.  I  said,  have  you  any  social  life,  any  sort  of  club, 
entertainment  with  music,  or  parties  ? 

Shishgalev.  No,  we  haven't. 

Babayev.  But  where  do  the  members  of  the  court  and  the 
rest  of  them  spend  their  time? 

Shishgalev.  They  usually  spend  it  together. 

Babayev.  How  together? 

Shishgalev.  Every  day  is  assigned.  For  instance,  to-day 
they  are  with  the  prefect,  to-morrow  with  the  judge,  day  after 
to-morrow  with  the  attorney;  then  with  the  farmer  of  the 
spirit  tax,  and  next  with  the  retired  police  captain — and  so  all 
the  week  goes  by. 

Babayev.  At  what  time  do  they  meet? 

Shishgalev.  About  six  o'clock. 

Babayev.  What  do  they  do  then  ? 

Shishgalev.  They  play  preference. 

Babayev.  And  what  else,  certainly  not  only  preference? 

Shishgalev.  That's  the  truth,  just  preference.  But  usu- 
ally they  have  tables  with  drinks  and  refreshments— just  as 
it  should  be.  They  play,  and  then  they  take  a  bite,  and  so 
they  pass  the  time. 

Babayev.  And  do  they  all  drink,  from  six  o'clock  on  ? 

Shishgalev.  Oh,  no,  by  no  means !  Only  the  dealer,  or 
some  one  who  has  to  pay  a  fine. 

Babayev.  Then,  my  dear  sir,  I  can't  help  it.  I've  got  to 
wait. 

Shishgalev.  Just  wait  awhile,  sir.     On  Monday  you  will 


SCENE  III  SIN  AND   SORROW  141 

please  appear  in  court,  and  we'll  arrange  the  matter  without 
delay. 

Babayev.  Very  well,  I  will  be  in  court  on  Monday.  But 
you'll  have  some  writing  to  do  for  me.  Then  I'll  give  you 
—as  is  proper — I  don't  like  any  one  to  labor  for  me  for 
nothing. 

Shishgalev.  My  family  is  large,  Your  Honor 

Babayet.  What's  that.^ 

Shishgalev.  Do  have  the  kindness   to   bestow   a  little 
something 

Babayev.  Really,  I  don't  know;  how's  that.''  How  much 
do  you  want.'' 

Karp.  Give  him  one  ruble,  sir;  that'll  be  enough  for  him. 

Babayev.  [Giving  the  money]  Here  you  are — ^I'm  really 
ashamed. 

Shishgalev.  [Depositing  the  coin  in  his  pocket]  Not  at  all. 
I  thank  you  heartily;  I  wish  you  all  good  fortune.     [Goes  out. 


SCENE    III 

Babayev  and  Karp 

Babayev.  How  rude  you  are,  Karp. 

Karp.  If  you  begin  to  be  sentimental  with  'em,  sir,  they'll 
get  the  habit  of  calling  around  here  and  bewailing  their  fate. 
No  amount  of  money  will  suffice  'em.  They're  a  godless 
crowd. 

Babayev.  Well,  what'U  I  do?  I'd  like  to  go  for  a  walk, 
but  it's  still  hot.     Karp,  what  shall  I  do  ? 

Karp.  I'll  tell  you  what,  go  to  sleep;  after  travelling  it's 
a  good  thing. 

Babayev.  But  what  shall  I  do  at  night? 


142  SIN   AND   SORROW  acti 

Karp.  At  night  just  the  same.  They  say  people  sleep 
when  they're  bored. 

Babayev.  How  stupid  I  was  not  to  bring  any  books.  If 
I  only  had  some  frivolous  intrigue  to  amuse  myself  with  for 
four  days.  [Goes  out  through  the  side  door. 

Karp.  So  that's  what  you  wish !  An  intrigue !  That's 
his  style !  He  was  liis  mother's  spoiled  darling  and  he  was 
raised  with  yoiuig  ladies  and  in  the  housemaids'  room, 
and  he  has  a  hankering  for  that  kind  of  thing  now.  Since 
I've  lived  in  St.  Petersburg  with  him,  what  things  I  have 
seen;  it  was  shameful!  I  wonder  if  he's  asleep.''  I'd  like 
to  have  a  nap.  [He's  about  to  lie  down  when  the  door  opens\ 
Who's  that  ? 

LuKERYA  comes  in. 

SCENE    IV 

Karp  and  Lukerya 

Karp.  What  do  you  want? 

Lukerya.  Valentin  Pavlych. 

Karp.  What  do  you  want  of  him.? 

Lukerya.  If  I  want  to  see  him,  of  course  it  must  be 
necessary. 

Karp.  Do  you  want  help  of  some  sort.'' 

Lukerya.  How  rude !  Aren't  you  aware  that  the  Zhmi- 
gulin  ladies  were  always  welcome  at  the  home  of  your  mas- 
ter's mother.''  I  am  also  very  intimately  acquainted  with 
Valentin  Pavlych. 

Karp.  You  are?     I  doubt  it. 

Lukerya.  Maybe  you  stupidly  misunderstand  my  words 
in  some  way  that's  beyond  me.  [Sits  down]  Your  business  is 
to  go  right  off  and  announce  me. 

Karp.  I  tell  you  he's  asleep  now. 


SCENE  V  SIN  AND   SORROW  143 

LuKERYA.  That  can't  be,  because  I've  just  seen  him 
through  the  window. 

Karp.  Well,  I  see  I  can't  do  anything  with  you;  I'll  have 
to  announce  you.  [Goes  out. 

LuKERYA.  In  these  modern  times,  these  new  changes  have 
done  a  lot  to  spoil  people.  He  ought  to  have  found  out  first 
what  my  rank  was,  and  then  treated  me  accordingly.  And 
it's  not  his  business  whether  I  came  to  ask  for  aid  or  not. 
To  be  sure,  people  of  our  station  are  often  engaged  in  that, 
but  not  all.  Maybe  Valentin  Pavlych  has  become  so  proud 
since  he  has  lived  in  St.  Petersburg  that  he  will  not  wish 
to  see  me.  But  I'm  so  anxious  to  show  every  one  here  what 
acquaintances  we  have.  I  think  he  didn't  disdain  us  for- 
merly, especially  sister  Tanya. 
Babayev  comes  in. 

SCENE    V 

Babayev  and  Lukerya 

Babayev.  Whom  have  I  the  honor  of  addressing? 

Lukerya.  I  hardly  expected,  Valentin  Pavlych,  that  you 
would  so  soon  forget  old  acquaintances. 

Babayev.  Be  seated,  please.  [Both  sit  down]  I  somehow 
do  not  recall. 

Lukerya.  Of  course,  nowadays  feelings  are  not  in  vogue; 
now  it's  all  a  matter  of  calculation;  but  we  provincials  aren't 
like  you  in  St.  Petersburg;  we  remember  our  former  acquain- 
tances, and  especially  our  benefactors. 

Babayev.  I  agree  with  you — benefactors  should  always 
be  remembered. 

Lukerya.  We  are  so  indebted  to  your  mother  that  words 
fail  me  to  express  it.  She  did  so  much  for  the  Zhmigulin 
family. 


144  SIN  AND   SORROW  act  i 

Babayev.  The  Zhmigulins  ? 

LuKERYA.  Especially  for  sister  Tanya  am]  me. 

Babayev.  [Ri.'iitKj]  Tanya — Tatyana  Danilovna? 

LuKERYA.  Do  you  remember,  now .'' 

Babayev.  So  j'oii  are  her  sister? 

LuKEUYA.  Lnkerya  Danilovna  Zhmigulin. 

Babayev.  Pardon  me,  I  beg  of  you. 

LuKERYA.  I'm  not  in  the  least  offended  because  you  re- 
member my  sister  more  readily  than  you  do  me.  She's  so 
beautiful  that  it's  impossible  to  forget  her. 

Babayev.  Yes,  yes,  she  was  an  exceedingly  beautiful  girl; 
we  were  great  friends. 

Lukerya.  I'm  aware  of  that.  Who  should  know  it  if 
not  I  ?     Being  the  elder  sister  I  had  to  care  for  the  younger. 

Babayev.  Yes,  yes,  to  be  sure.  Tell  me,  if  you  please, 
where  is  she  now  ?     What  is  she  doing  ? 

Lukerya.  She's  here  in  the  city,  married. 

Babayev.  Married  ?     Does  she  live  happily  ? 

Lukerya.  Judge  for  yourself.  She  lives  in  poverty  among 
stupid,  ignorant  people.  It  isn't  as  it  was  in  your  mother's 
house  at  Zavetnoye.  That  was  an  earthly  paradise !  Your 
mother  was  the  kindest  of  ladies,  and  liked  to  have  every- 
body happy  at  her  house.  There  were  always  lots  of  young 
ladies  in  her  house,  and  likewise  young  gentlemen,  and  they 
played  games  from  morning  till  night.  She  made  even  the 
chambermaids  play  tag  with  us  and  other  games,  and  she 
looked  on  and  enjoyed  it. 

Babayev.  Yes,  yes,  it  was  but  a  short  time  ago.  It's  no 
more  than  three  years  since  I  left  for  St.  Petersburg. 

Lukerya.  I  remember  it  very  well.  You  left  three  years 
ago  last  carnival  time.  Your  mother  didn't  like  any  of  her 
guests  to  be  moody  or  to  read  books.  She  would  say:  "Why, 
you're  spoiling  everybody's  spirits."     Every  one  was  madly 


SCENE  V  SIN   AND   SORROW  145 

gay  for  lier  sake,  but  in  the  midst  of  all  that  gayety  anybody 
who  had  a  keen  eye  could  see  quite  a  little. 

Babayev.  Nothing  more  natural !  Men,  girls,  and  young 
ladies  continually  together — of  course  they  couldn't  help 
falling  in  love. 

LuKERYA.  You  were  especially  strong  in  that  line.  You 
were  continually  with  Tanya,  and  you  never  left  her,  so  they 
called  you  the  "doves." 

Babayev.  One's  heart's  not  a  stone,  Lukerya  Danilovna. 
Even  you  yourself — do  you  remember  the  surveyor.^ 

Lukerya.  He  isn't  worth  remembering.  Later  on  he 
behaved  in  a  very  ungentlemanly  way  to  me.  But  fate  has 
punished  him  for  his  lack  of  courtesy  towards  a  girl  of  noble 
birth.     He's  now  in  jail  for  being  drunk  and  disorderly. 

Babayev.  Kindly  tell  me  how  it  happened  that  your  sister 
married .'' 

Lukerya.  When  your  mamma  died  last  summer  we  had 
absolutely  no  one  left  to  help  us.  Our  papa  in  his  old  age 
was  of  no  account  in  the  city.  He  was  a  timid  man,  and 
so  he  didn't  get  on  well.  Our  father  was  a  clerk  in  the  Chan- 
cery Office,  and  he  received  a  salary  of  tliirty  rubles  a  year. 
How  could  we  live  on  such  a  sum .''  And  yet  we  saw  some- 
thing of  society.  At  first  we  were  hardly  ever  at  home,  and 
your  mamma  aided  us  in  many  ways.  Suddenly  all  that 
stopped,  and  soon  our  father  died.  At  that  time  Tanya  re- 
ceived an  offer  from — I'm  almost  ashamed  to  tell  you. 

Babayev.  Why,  what  are  you  ashamed  of.'' 

Lukerya.  You  are  receiving  me  so  graciously,  and  your 
interest  in  my  sister  makes  me  feel  that  our  actions  have 
been  very  uncivil. 

Babayev.  "^Fhat  can't  be  helped.  Probably  it  was  all  due 
to  circumstances.     What  are  you  to  blame  for? 

l^uivERYA.  You  can  hardlv  imagine  the  degree  of  embar- 


146  SIN  AND   SORROW  acti 

rassment  this  relationship  causes  me.  In  a  word,  our  cir- 
cumstances were  such  that  she  was  forced  to  marry  a  petty 
shopkeeper. 

Babayev.  a  petty  shopkeeper.^  What  kind  of  shop  has 
he.^ 

LuKERYA.  A  vegetable  shop.  You  can  see  it  from  here, 
the  sign  reads,  "Lev  Krasnov." 

Babayev.  Yes,  I  noticed  it.     Is  he  a  good  unsLTi? 

LuKERYA.  Considering  the  type,  he's  a  very  nice  man, 
and  he  loves  sister  very  dearly.  Yet  there  is  something  so 
inherently  bad  about  his  calling  that,  judge  as  you  will,  he's 
still  not  very  far  removed  from  a  peasant.  That  trait  of 
character,  if  y(ju  boil  a  man  for  seven  years  in  a  kettle,  you 
cannot  boil  out.  Yet  I  must  give  him  credit  for  taking  good 
care  of  his  house.  He  doesn't  give  himself  any  rest  day  or 
night;  he  toils  hard  all  the  time.  As  for  my  sister,  he's  willing 
to  give  her  whatever  her  heart  desires,  even  his  last  kopek, 
just  to  please  her,  so  that  she  does  absolutely  nothing,  and 
lives  like  a  lady.  But  his  manners  are  boorish,  and  his  con- 
versation embarrasses  us  very  much.  Altogether  this  is 
not  the  kind  of  happiness  I  wished  for  Tanya.  Judging  by 
her  beauty  and  the  standing  of  her  former  admirers,  she 
should  now  be  riding  in  a  carriage.  As  it  is,  necessity  has 
forced  her  to  marry  a  peasant,  almost  for  a  crust  of  bread, 
and  to  blush  for  him  whenever  she  sees  anybody. 

Babayev.  So  Tatyana  Danilovna  has  married — I'm  sorry. 

LuKERYA.  You  needn't  feel  sorry.  She's  no  match  for 
you. 

Babay'Ev.  Of  course. — Here  I  am  in  this  city,  and  owing 
to  circumstances  I'm  forced  to  remain  at  least  four  days, 
and  maybe  more.  What  am  I  going  to  do  ?  I'm  very  much 
oleased  that  vou  have  called  on  me.  If  it  hadn't  been  for 
you   I   don't  know  what  I  should  have  done  with  myself. 


SCENE  V  SIN   AND   SORROW  147 

Now,  just  imagine,  if  your  sister  weren't  married,  we'd  spend 
these  four  days  so  that  we  shouldn't  know  how  the  time  was 
passing.  [Takes  her  by  the  hand]  Isn't  that  true? 

LuKERYA.  Who's  keei^ing  you  from  that  now  ? 

Babayev.  Well,  you  see  it's  awkward;  being  married, 
what  will  her  husband  tliink  ?     It's  really  provoking. 

Lukerya.  You  don't  mean  it !  It  seems  to  me  that  you 
used  to  have  different  opinions  on  such  things.  You  weren't 
so  anxious  to  know  what  pleased  the  husbands  and  what 
didn't. 

Babayev.  Yes,  but  that  was  in  an  entirely  different  social 
circle.     There  manners  are  much  more  free. 

Lukerya.  How  do  you  know  whether  my  sister  has  free- 
dom or  hasn't.'* 

Babayev.  [Taking  both  her  hands]  At  all  events,  I'm  so 
glad,  so  thankful  to  you  for  furnishing  me  with  diversion 
when  I  was  bored.  Don't  you  want  something?  Be  good 
enough  to  make  yourself  at  home;  everything  is  at  your 
service.     Will  you  have  some  tea? 

Lukerya.  Thank  you,  I've  just  had  tea.  But  I  must 
hurry  home  now.  I  have  to  attend  to  some  matters  with 
sister.     Shall  I  extend  her  your  greetings  ? 

Babayev.  Please  be  so  kind. 

Lukerya.  [Going  to  the  door]  Why  don't  you  invite  sister 
and  me  to  call  on  you  ? 

Babayev.  I  should  be  so  happy  to  have  you,  only  I  really 
don't  know  how  to  arrange  it.  I  should  like  very  much  to 
see  Tatyana  Danilovna. 

Lukerya.  If  you  wish  to  see  her,  then  where's  the  ob- 
stacle? She  isn't  a  princess  imprisoned  behind  ten  locks. 
You'll  go  for  a  walk,  no  doubt,  as  you  can't  remain  in  your 
room  ? 


148  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  i 

Babayev.  I  slioiild  like  to  go,  hut  I  hardly  know  in  what 
direction. 

LuKERYA.  You  needn't  go  fur.  Stroll  out  of  the  rear 
gate  to  the  river-bank,  sit  down  on  the  hencli  and  enjoy  the 
beauty  of  nature.  It's  a  quiet,  secluded  place;  few  people 
ever  go  there.  It's  a  most  delightful  walk  for  sentimental 
young  people.  Sister  and  I  will  go  that  way,  and  there  you 
may  be  able  to  see  her.     Good  day  !  [She  goes  out. 

Babayev.  What  a  surprise !  Could  I  have  expected  such 
good  fortune?  Little  Tanya,  little  Tanya!  I  shall  see  her 
again  !  I'll  go  mad  with  joy.  She  was  so  charming,  so  deli- 
cate. Some  people  said  that  she  didn't  have  much  sense, 
but  is  that  a  fault  in  a  woman?  And  then  her  beauty,  her 
beauty !  It's  likely  that  instead  of  four  days  I'll  stay  four 
weeks.  [Goes  out. 


TABLEAU    II 

The  bank  of  a  river;  at  one  side  a  fence  and  gate,  at  the  other 
a  corner  of  a  barn;  bcijond,  the  river  stretches  the  country- 
side ;  sunset. 


SCENE    I 

Enter  Arkhip  and  Afonya 

Afonya.  Grandfather,  let's  rest  here  awhile.  I  feel  ill 
to-day.     Sit  down  here  on  the  bench. 

Arkhip.  Very  well,  Afonya,  we'll  sit  down  here.  You 
and  I  are  unfortunate:  age  is  overcoming  me  and  sickness 
you. 

Afonya.  I'm  not  ailing.  I  was  born  so.  Grandfather, 
I  shan't  live  long  in  this  bright  world. 


SCENE  I  SIN   AND   SORROW  149 

Arkhip.  Don't  listen  to  old  wives'  tales.  No  one  knows 
what  fate  awaits  him. 

Afonya.  What  do  I  care  for  old  wives  !  I  know  that  I 
shall  not  live  long.  My  appetite  is  failing.  Others  have  such 
hearty  appetites  after  working.  They  eat  a  whole  lot  and 
want .  more.  There's  brother  Lev,  when  he's  tired — just 
keep  giving  him  food.  But  I  don't  care  if  I  never  eat  at  all. 
My  soul  won't  take  anj'thing.  I  just  swallow  a  crust — ^and 
am  satisfied. 

Arkhip.  That  helps  growth. 

Afonya.  No,  it  doesn't.  Why  should  I  grow  any  more, 
anyhow  !  As  it  is,  I  am  tall  for  my  age.  But  it's  a  sign  that 
I  shall  not  live.  Just  listen,  grandfather;  a  man  who  is 
alive  thinks  of  living  things,  but  I  don't  have  any  interest 
in  anything.  Some  people  like  nice  clothes,  but  for  me  it's 
all  the  same — whatever  rag  is  near  at  hand — just  so  I'm 
warm.  For  instance,  all  the  boys  have  some  hobby;  some 
like  fishing,  others  games,  some  sing  songs;  but  nothing  at- 
tracts me.  While  others  are  happy  I  feel  depressed.  Misery 
seems  to  grip  my  heart. 

Arkhip.  That  is  God's  gift  to  you.  From  your  childhood 
you  have  had  no  love  for  this  vain  world.  Some  lose  their 
faint-heartedness  with  years,  when  woes  and  afilictions, 
Afonya,  crush  and  grind  a  man  into  powder;  but  you  have 
never  lived,  have  not  yet  tasted  the  world's  sorrows  or  joys, 
and  yet  you  reason  like  an  old  man.  Thank  God  that  he 
has  made  you  wise.  The  world  does  not  charm  you:  you 
do  not  know  temptation,  so  your  sins  are  less.  That  is  your 
good  fortune.  Just  listen  to  me.  I,  Afonya,  have  known 
temptation  and  have  not  always  turned  aside  from  it,  and 
most  often  I  souglit  temptation  of  my  own  free  will.  You 
say  everything  seems  the  same  to  you,  that  nothing  in  the 
world  delights  you;    but  to  me  God's  world  was  good  and 


loO  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  i 

hrif^ht.  Everytliing  beckoned  and  charmed  me.  An  un- 
sated  eye  and  free  will  command  one  to  taste  all  the  pleasures 
of  the  universe.  But  in  the  world,  Afonya,  good  and  evil 
go  hand  in  hand.  Well,  one's  sins  may  be  more  in  number 
than  the  sands  of  t\\e  sea.  Luckily  God  prolonged  my  life, 
that  I  might  repent,  and  did  not  strike  me  down  in  my  sins. 
We  repent  and  humble  ourselves  and  hope  for  mercy;  but 
you  will  have  nothing  to  repent  of;  you,  Afonya,  are  a  man 
of  God. 

Afonya.  No,  grandfather,  no,  do  not  speak  so.  How  am 
I  a  man  of  God  ?  I  have  seen  men  of  God,  but  they  are 
good  and  do  not  remember  evil.  They  are  abused  and 
mocked,  but  they  laugh  at  it,  while  I  am  rough  and  harsh, 
just  like  my  brother;  only  brother  is  forgiving  though 
quick-tempered,  while  I  am  not.  I,  grandfather,  I  have  an 
evil  temper. 

Arkhip.  At  whom  should  you  be  angry,  my  child;  who 
injures  you  ? 

Afonya.  No  one  injures  me.  but  my  heart  aches  for 
every  one — for  you,  for  brother,  for  all  of  you. 

Arkhip.  Why  are  you  grieving  for  us?  We  have  noth- 
ing to  complain  of. 

Afonya.  We  didn't  have  anything  to  complain  of,  grand- 
father, before  brother  married.  Grandfather,  why  does 
brother  love  his  wife  so? 

Arkhip.  Why  shouldn't  he  love  her  ?  Why  did  he  marry 
her  ?  You  should  be  happy  because  he  loves  his  wife.  What 
a  foolish  fellow  you  are ! 

Afonya.  No,  I  speak  the  truth.  Formerly  brother  used 
to  love  you  and  me  much  more  than  now. 

Arkhip.  So  you  are  jealous  !     Probably  you  are  envious. 

Afonya.  No,  it  isn't  envy;  but  is  my  brother  blind? 
Does  she  love  him  as  he  does  her  ?     Is  she  worthy  of  him  ? 


SCENE  I  SIN   AND   SORROW  151 

Why  is  he  so  servile  in  the  presence  of  her  and  her  kin  ? 
His  serviUty  offends  me.  Is  he  inferior  to  her  and  her  sister  ? 
One  marries  a  wife  to  have  a  helper;  but  she  sits  with 
folded  hands.  Brother  alone  works  and  dances  attendance 
on  them.     I  pity  him. 

Arkhip.  What  business  is  it  of  yours  ?  It's  his  own 
choice.  He  works  and  doesn't  force  you  to.  You  and  I 
are  fed  by  his  kindness. 

Afonya.  Don't  I  know  that?  Tell  me,  grandfather,  is 
she  any  better  than  brother  or  not.f* 

Arkhip.  Better  or  not,  she  is  of  different  sort. 

Afonya.  What  do  you  mean  by  "different  sort"  !  As  it 
is,  brother  is  obliged  to  work  for  them,  feed  and  clothe  them, 
while  they  give  themselves  airs.  There  isn't  a  better  man 
in  the  world  than  brother,  and  they  have  made  him  their 
drudge. 

Arkhip.  How  do  you  know  ?  Your  brother  himself  may 
not  wish  her  to  work. 

Afonya.  But  if  she  doesn't  work  then  she'd  better  not 
put  on  airs.  Since  she  married  a  commoner  she  should  be 
one  like  the  rest  of  us.  Are  we  a  sort  of  accursed  people .' 
Lord,  pardon  me  for  saying  it !  We  too  have  our  communal 
society  and  we  pay  taxes  and  take  part  in  other  obligations. 
My  brother  gets  money  by  sweat  and  toil,  and  contributes  it 
to  the  community.  She  might  stay  at  home  and  play  the 
lady,  but  if  she  marries,  then  she  should  know  that  there  is 
one  master  in  the  house — her  husband.  You  see,  grand- 
father, I  see  and  hear  everything,  since  they  are  so  shame- 
less as  not  to  pay  any  heed  to  me.  Brother  gives  her  ker- 
chiefs and  silk  dresses,  while  she  and  her  sister  laugh  at  him 
and  call  him  a  fool.  I  hear  it  all;  it  is  bitter  to  me,  grand- 
father, bitter.  I  began  to  speak  to  brother  about  it,  but  he 
scolded  me.  [Pause]  Grandfather,  that  is  why  I  can't  sleep. 


152  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  i 

What  I  see  by  day  appears  to  me  at  night,  gnaws  at  my  heart, 
and  I  weep  all  night.  I  shan't  hve  long.  My  health  cannot 
improve  now  because  my  temper  is  altogether  too  violent. 
If  God  would  only  take  me  quickly  so  that  I  should  have 
less  suffering ! 

Arkhip.  Don't  say  such  sinful  things !  You  have  to  live 
and  live !  You  see,  Afonya,  I  have  nothing  to  live  for,  yet 
I  keep  on  living.  God  know's  the  reason  of  all  this.  What 
a  man  I  am !  I  never  see  the  fair  sun  or  the  bright  moon, 
and  likewise  I  shall  never  see  the  green  meadows  or  the  cool 
waters  and  all  creatures  of  God.  But  hardest  of  all  is  that 
I  cannot  see  the  bright  face  of  man. 

Afonya.  It  is  a  pity,  grandfather,  that  you  cannot  see; 
but  I'm  tired  of  everything,  notliing  comforts  me. 

Arkhip.  The  reason  you  are  not  comforted  is  that  your 
heart  is  not  at  peace.  Look  at  God's  world  longer  and 
more  often,  and  less  at  men  and  women,  and  you  will  become 
lighter  of  heart;  you  will  sleep  at  night  and  have  pleasant 
dreams.     Where  are  we  sitting  now,  Afonya? 

Afonya.  On  the  bank,  grandfather,  beside  Prokofyevna's 
house. 

Arkhip.  Is  the  bridge  at  our  right? 

Afonya.  Yes,  grandfather. 

Arkhip.  Is  the  sun  at  our  left? 
.     Afonya.  Yes,  grandfather,  but  it's  almost  set. 

Arkhip.  In  a  cloud  ? 

Afonya.  No,  it  is  clear.  The  twilight  is  so  brilliant. 
We'll  have  fine  weather. 

Arkhip.  That's  it,  that's  it.  I  feel  it  myself.  The  air 
is  so  light  and  the  breeze  so  fresh  that  I  do  not  want  to  leave. 
Beautiful,  Afonya,  beautiful  is  God's  w^orld.  Now  the  dew 
will  fall  and  fragrance  will  rise  from  every  flower;  and  yon- 
der the  stars  will  come  out;    and  above  the  stars,  Afonva,  is 


SCENE  II  SIN   AND   SORROW  153 

our  merciful  Creator.     If  we  remembered  more  constantly 
that  He  is  merciful,  we  ourselves  should  be  more  merciful. 

Afonya.  I  will  try  to  subdue  my  heart,  grandfather. 
[Babayev  comes  in]  Let  us  go.  Some  strange  gentleman  is 
walking  here;   he  would  probably  laugh  at  our  talk. 

Arkhip.  [Following  Afonya]  My  soul  magnifies  God. 
They  go  out. 


SCENE    II 

Babayev  alone 

Babayev.  When  you  are  waiting  for  something  pleasant 
the  time  seems  to  drag !  I  purposely  came  by  the  longest 
road  so  as  not  to  arrive  too  early,  but  nevertheless  I  got 
here  before  they  did.  How  I  hate  to  wait !  What  a  foolish 
situation !  Women  generally  like  to  torment :  it's  their 
nature;  they  like  to  have  some  one  wait  for  them.  Of  course, 
that  doesn't  apply  to  Tanya;  I  believe  she's  very,  very  glad 
that  I  have  arrived.  I  speak  of  women  of  our  own  sort.  I 
think  they  torment,  because — how  shall  I  express  it — the 
idea  is  entirely  original — in  order  to  compensate  themselves 
in  advance  for  the  rights  which  they  lose  later.  That's  the 
result  of  being  in  a  lovely  landscape  face  to  face  with  nature ! 
What  brilliant  thoughts  come  to  one !  If  this  thought  were 
developed  at  leisure,  in  the  country,  it  might  form  a  small 
novel,  even  a  comedy  on  the  order  of  Alfred  de  Musset. 
But  such  things  are  not  plaj'ed  in  our  country.  They  must 
be  presented  delicately,  very  delicately — here  the  principal 
thing  is  the — bouquet.  I  think  some  one  is  coming.  Is  it 
they .''  How  shall  we  meet  ?  Two  years  of  separation  mean 
much. 

Tatyana  and  Lukerya  come  in. 


154  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  i 

SCENE    III 

Bab  AYE  V,  Tat  Y  AN  A,  and  Lukerya 

Tatyana.  [Extending  her  hand  to  Babayev]  How  do  you 
do,  Valentin  Pavlych !  I  was  so  happy  when  sister  told  me 
that  you  had  returned. 

Babayev.  So,  do  you  still  remember  me? 

Tatyana.  Indeed  I  do !  We  frequently,  that  is,  sister 
and  I,  very  frequently  speak  of  you.  She  tells  me  that  you 
have  forgotten  us. 

Babayev.  No,  I  have  not  forgotten  you.  There  are 
memories,  my  darling  Tatyana  Danilovna,  which  are  not 
readily  forgotten.  My  acquaintance  with  you  was  of  that 
sort.     Isn't  that  so.^* 

Tatyana.  [Dropping  her  eyes]  Yes,  sir. 

Babayev.  Let  me  assure  you  that  as  soon  as  I  could  tear 
myself  away  from  St.  Petersburg,  and  come  to  the  country, 
I  continually  sought  an  occasion  to  visit  this  city  and  to  find 
you  without  fail. 

Lukerya.  Have  you  never  found  such  an  occasion  before 
now  ?     Don't  tell  me  that ! 

Babayev.  I  assure  you. 

Lukerya.  Much  we  believe  you !  Tanya,  do  not  believe 
the  gentlemen;  they  always  deceive. 

Babayev.  Why  speak  so  to  me  ? 

Lukerya.  That  doesn't  apply  just  to  you,  but  to  all  other 
fine  young  gentlemen. 

Tatyana.  Shall  you  remain  long  in  this  city.'' 

Babayev.  Shall  I  remain  long.-^  At  first  I  thought  it 
would  depend  upon  the  clerks  who  have  my  affair  in  hand, 
but  now  I  see  that  it  will  depend  upon  you,  my  darling 
Tatyana  Danilovna. 


SCENE  II  SIN   AND   SORROW  155 

Tatyana.  That  honors  me  entirely  too  much.  No,  tell 
me,  shall  you  be  here  three  or  four  days? 

Babayev.  They  promised  to  arrange  my  affairs  in  three 
days,  but  maybe  I'll  stay  three  or  four  days  longer,  if  you 
wish  me  to. 

Tatyana.  Certainly,  I  do. 

Babayev.  There  is  just  one  drawback,  my  darling  Tatyana 
Danilovna:  your  city  is  dreadfully  lonesome.  I  will  remain 
on  one  condition,  that  I  may  see  you  as  often  as  possible. 

Tatyana.  That's  very  simple.  Call  on  us.  We  shall  be 
delighted  to  have  you  come  to  tea  to-morrow. 

Babayev.  Yes,  but  it's  impossible  to  call  on  you  often, 
as  gossip  and  talk  spreads,  and  then  there's  your  husband 

Tatyana.  This  doesn't  concern  him.  You  are  my  ac- 
quaintance; you  call  on  me,  not  him. 

Lukerya.  Then  we  on  our  side  will  observe  the  courtesies 
and  will  return  your  call.  Besides,  we  often  visit  your  land- 
lady, so  if  it's  pleasant  for  you  to  see  us,  you  can  call  in  there. 

Babayev.  [Withdrawing  to  one  side  with  Tatyana]  Doesn't 
married  life  bore  you  ? 

Tatyana.  [After  a  pause]  I  don't  know;  what  can  I  say 
to  that  ? 

Babayev.  My  darling  Tatyana  Danilovna,  be  perfectly 
frank  with  me.  You  know  what  kind  feelings  I've  always 
had  for  you. 

Tatyana.  Why  should  I  be  so  frank  with  you.'*  What 
good  can  come  of  it?     It's  too  late  to  mend  things  now. 

Babayev.  If  you  can't  mend  things  entirely,  at  least, 
darling  Tatyana  Danilovna,  you  can  sweeten  your  existence 
for  a  time,  so  that  you  will  not  be  entirely  smothered  by  the 
vulgar  life  around  you. 

Tatyana.  For  a  time,  yes !  Then  life  will  be  harder  than 
ever. 


156  SIN  AND  SORROW  act  i 

Babayev.  Do  you  know,  I  want  to  move  to  the  country; 
then  we  could  be  near  to  one  another.  I  am  even  ready  to 
move  to  this  town,  if  only  you 

Tatyana.  [Turning  away]  Please  don't  talk  to  me  like 
that !  I  didn't  expect  to  hear  such  things  from  you,  Valentin 
Pavlych. 

LuKERYA.  [To  Babayev]  You're  getting  in  pretty  deep 
there.     I  hear  everything  you're  saying. 

Babayev.  Lukerya  Danilovna,  I  think  some  one  is  coming. 
Take  a  look  out  on  the  hank  there.  I'm  anxious  that  we 
should  not  be  seen  here  together. 

Lukerya.  Oh,  you're  a  sly  gentleman  !  [Goes  away. 

Tatyana.  So  you  will  have  tea  with  us  to-morrow,  Valen- 
tin Pavlych? 

Babayev.  I  really  don't  know — very  likely. 

Tatyana.  No,  don't  fail  to  come !  [Pause]  Well,  how 
shall  I  invite  you?  [Takes  Babayev  by  the  hand]  Well,  my 
darling  !     Well,  my  precious  ! 

Babayev.  It  seems  to  me  that  you  have  changed,  Tatyana 
Danilovna. 

Tatyana.  I,  changed !  Honestly  I  haven't.  Not  a  bit. 
Why  are  you  so  cruel  to  me? 

Babayev.  Do  you  remember  Zavetnoye,  Tatyana  Dani- 
lovna ? 

Tatyana.  Why  ?     I  remember  it  all. 

Babayev.  Do  you  remember  the  garden  ?  Do  you  remem- 
ber the  linden  walk?  Do  you  remember  how,  after  supper, 
while  mother  slept,  we  used  to  sit  on  the  terrace?  Do  you 
recall  the  narrow  ribbon  ? 

Tatyana.  [In  a  loio  voice]  Which  one? 

Babayev.  With  which  you  tied  my  hands. 

Tatyana.  [Embarrassed]  Well,  what  of  that?  Yes,  I  re- 
member absolutely  everything. 


SCENE  II  SIN   AND   SORROW  157 

Babayev.  Just  that  you,  my  precious,  are  now  entirely 
different;  you  have  met  me  so  coldly. 

Tatyana.  Ah,  Valentin  Pavlych !  Then  I  was  a  girl  and 
could  love  any  one  I  wished ;  now  I  am  married.     Just  think  ! 

Babayev.  Why,  certainly.  Yet  I  can't  imagine  you  be- 
longing to  any  one  else.  Do  what  you  will,  I  can  hardly 
control  my  desire  to  call  you  Tanya,  as  I  used  to. 

Tatyana.  Why  control  yourself?     Call  me  Tanya. 

Babayev.  But  what's  the  use,  my  dear !  You  don't  love 
me  any  more ! 

Tatyana.  Who  told  you  that  ?  I  love  you  as  much,  even 
more  than  before. 

Babayev.  [Bending  towards  her]  Is  it  possible,  Tanechka, 
that  that  is  the  truth.? 

Tatyana.  [Kissing  him]  Well,  here's  my  evidence !  Noio 
do  you  believe  ?  But,  darling  Valentin  Pavlych,  if  you  don't 
wish  me  unhappiness  for  the  rest  of  my  life,  we  must  love 
one  another  as  we  are  doing  now;  but  you  mustn't  think  of 
more  than  that.  Otherwise,  good-by  to  you — away  from 
temptation ! 

Babayev.  Set  your  mind  at  rest,  darling,  about  that. 

Tatyana.  No,  you  swear  to  me !  Swear,  so  that  I  may 
not  fear  you. 

Babayev.  How  foolish  you  are ! 

Tatyana.  Yes,  I  am  foolish,  certainly.  If  I  should  listen 
to  the  opinions  of  older  people,  then  I  am  committing  a  great 
wrong.  According  to  the  old  law,  I  must  love  no  one  other 
than  my  husband.  But  since  I  can't  love  him — and  loved 
you  before  my  marriage,  and  can't  change  my  heart,  so  I — 
only  God  preserve  you  from — ^and  I  won't  in  any  respect — 
because  I  wish  to  live  right. 

Babayev.  Calm  yourself. 

Tatyana.  That's    the   way,    my   dear   \'alentin    Pa\ly('h. 


158  SIN   AND   SORROW  acti 

It  means  that  we  shall  now  have  a  very  pleasant  love-afFair, 
without  sinning  against  God,  or  feeling  shame  before  men. 

Bauayev.  Yes,  yes,  that'll  be  splendid  ! 

Tatyana.  Now  I'll  give  you  a  kiss  because  you're  so  clever  ! 
[Kisses  him]  So  you  will  come  to-morrow  evening  ? 

Babayev.  And  then  you'll  visit  me? 

Tatyana.  Be  sure  to  come !  Then  we'll  visit  you.  Now 
I'm  not  afraid  of  you. 

Babayev.  How  beautiful  you  are !  You're  even  lovelier 
than  you  used  to  be. 

Tatyana.  Let  that  be  a  secret.  Good-by.  Come  on, 
Lusha ! 

LuKERYA.  [Approaching]  Good-by!  Good  night,  pleasant 
dreams — of  plucking  roses,  of  watering  jasmine !  [Going]  But 
what  a  man  you  are  !  Oh,  oh,  oh  !  He's  clever,  I  must  say  ! 
I  just  looked  and  wondered.  [They  go  out. 

Babay'EV.  Now  the  novel  is  beginning;  I  wonder  how 
it'll  end ! 


ACT    II 

TABLEAU    I 

A  room  in  Krasnov's  house;  directly  in  front  a  door  leading 
to  a  vestibule;  to  the  right  a  loindow  and  a  bed  with  chintz 
curtains;  to  the  left  a  stove-couch  and  a  door  into  the 
kitchen;  in  the  foreground  a  plain  board  table  and  several 
chairs  ;  along  Hhe  back  ivall  and  window  benches  ;  alovg 
the  left  wall  a  cupboard  with  cups,  a  small  mirror,  and  a 
wall  clock. 

SCENE    I 

Tatyana  stands  before  the  mirror  putting  on  a  kerchief ; 
Afonya  is  lying  on  the  stove-couch;  Lukerya  comes  in 
with  a  figured  table-cloth. 

Lukerya.  There,  Tanya,  I've  borrowed  a  cloth  from  the 
neighbor  to  cover  our  table.     Ours  is  awfully  poor. 

[Lays  the  cloth  on  the  table. 

Tatyana.  Have  you  started  the  samovar.'' 

Lukerya.  Long  ago;  it'll  boil  soon.  Well,  you  see  it's 
just  as  I  told  you;  that  kerchief  is  much  more  becoming  to 
you.  But  why  did  you  stick  the  pin  through  it?  [Adjusting 
it]  There,  that's  much  better. 

Afonya.  Where  are  you  dressing  up  to  go  to?  Why  are 
you  prinking  so  at  that  mirror? 

Tatyana.  Nowhere;  we're  going  to  stay  at  home. 

Lukerya.  What  business  is  it  of  yours  ?  Do  you  think 
we  ought  to  be  as  slovenly  as  yourself  ? 

Afonya.  But  who  are  you  fixing  up  for  ?     For  your  hus- 
159 


160  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  ii 

band  ?  He  loves  you  more  than  you  deserve  even  without 
the  fine  clothes.     Or  is  it  for  some  one  else  ? 

LuKERYA.  Hear  him  !  A  fool,  a  fool !  yet  he  understands 
that  she's  dressing  up  for  some  one  else. 

Tatyana.  Why  should  I  dress  for  my  husband.'*  He 
knows  me  anyway.     When  I  dress,  of  course  it's  for  a  stranger. 

Afonya.  Who  are  you  going  to  flirt  with  ?  Who  are  you 
going  to  charm .^     Have  you  no  conscience.'' 

LuKERYA.  What's  the  use  of  arguing  with  a  fool !  All 
he  has  to  do  is  to  chatter.  Lies  on  the  stove-couch  and  plots 
trouble. 

Tatyana.  What  kind  of  judge  are  you,  anyway?  My 
husband  never  says  anything  to  me,  and  yet  you  dare  to 
put  in  your  opinion  ! 

Afonya.  Yes,  but  he's  blinded  by  you,  blinded.  You've 
given  him  some  sort  of  love-charm. 

LuKERYA.  Keep  still,  seeing  that  God  has  made  you  a 
sick  man.  Tend  to  your  own  business;  keep  on  coughing, 
there's  no  sin  in  that. 

Afonya.  Fool — brother  is  a  fool !     He's  ruined  himself. 

LuKERYA.  Tanya,  shouldn't  I  bring  the  samovar  in  here.' 

Tatyana.  Yes,  and  I'll  set  the  cups.  [Puts  cups  on  the 
table.     LuKERYA  goes  out]  You'd  better  go  into  the  kitchen. 

Afonya.  I'm  all  right  here. 

Tatyana.  Strangers  are  coming  and  you'll  make  us 
gloomy. 

Afonya.  I  won't  go. 

Tatyana.  It's  a  true  proverb:  "There's  no  brewing  beer 
with  a  fool."  Our  guest  is  no  cheap  shopkeeper  like  your 
brother.  A  gentleman  is  coming,  do  you  hear.''  What  are 
you  fussing  about  ? 

Afonya.  What  sort  of  a  gentleman  ?     Why  is  he  coming  ? 

Tatyana.  Just  the  same  kind  of  gentleman  as  all  the  rest. 


SCENE  II  SIN   AND   SORROW  161 

He's  our  acquaintance,  a  rich  landowner;   well,  now  get  out ! 

Afonya.  He's  a  gentleman  in  his  own  house,  but  I'm  one 
here.  I'm  not  going  to  him,  but  he's  coming  here.  I'm  in 
my  own  house,  and  sick,  so  I  won't  consider  anybody.  Was 
it  him  you  dressed  up  for? 

Tatyana.  That's  my  business,  not  yours. 
LuKERYA  brings  in  the  samovar. 

LxjKERYA.  [Placing  the  samovar  on  the  table]  Lev  Rodi- 
onych  is  coming  with  some  people. 

Tatyana.  I  guess  some  of  his  relatives;  what  a  horrid 
nuisance ! 

Afonya.  Nuisance !  Why  did  you  ever  intrude  into  our 
family .'' 

Enter  Krasnov,  Kuritsyn,  Ulyana. 


SCENE    II 

Krasnov,   Tatyana,    Lukerya,   Afonya,    Kubitsyn,    and 
Ulyana. 

Krasnov.  [To  his  wife]  How  are  you.?  [Kisses  her. 

Tatyana.  How  affectionate ! 

Krasnov.  Never  mind.  We  have  a  perfect  right  to ! 
Let  me  treat  you.  We've  just  received  fresh  grapes.  [Gives 
her  a  bunch]  Here  I  have  brought  you  some  company.  The 
samovar  is  all  ready — that's  good. 

Ulyana.  How  do  you  do,  sister.''  You  are  so  proud  yon 
never  call  on  us!  But  we're  common  folks;  so  we  picked 
ourselves  up  and  came,  uninvited. 

Kuritsyn.  How  do  you  do,  sister.''  Why  are  you  so 
contemptuous  of  your  relatives.''  You  might  run  over  once 
in  a  while  for  tea;   your  feet  are  able  to  carry  you ! 

Ejrasnov.  How  has  she  time  to  go  visiting.^     She  has  so 


162  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  ii 

much  to  do  at  home.     She's  just  beginning  to  get  used  to 
the  househohl ! 

Ulyana.  Yes,  sister,  you  must  get  used  to  the  household. 
That's  our  woman's  duty.  You  di(hi't  marry  a  millionaire, 
so  you  needn't  put  on  airs. 

KuRiTSYN.  Yes,  y(ju'd  l)etter  learn,  and  well. 

Ulyana.  [Approaching  Afonya]  Ah,  Afonya,  are  you  still 
sick  ?     You  ought  to  take  something  ! 

KuRiTSYN.  [Also  approaching  Afonya]  You  eat  more — 
then  you'll  get  well.  If  you  don't  want  to,  then  force  your- 
self to  eat;  that's  what  I  tell  you  ! 

[Speaks  in  a  low  voice  to  Afonya. 

Tatyana.  [To  her  husband]  What  have  you  done!  What 
sort  of  company  have  you  brought? 

LuKERYA.  To  be  frank,  you've  spoiled  everything.  How 
embarrassing,  how  awfully  embarrassing ! 

EIrasnov.  What,  embarrassing.^  Is  some  lord  coming.'* 
What's  the  odds !  Nothing  to  get  excited  over !  Let  him 
see  our  relatives. 

LuKERYA.  Much  he's  interested  ! 

Krasnov.  I  can't  chase  my  sister  away  for  Mm.  So 
there's  nothing  more  to  be  said  about  it.  I  haven't  set  eyes 
on  him  yet,  I  don't  know  what  he's  like;  these,  at  any  rate, 
are  our  own.  And,  besides,  they'll  not  stay  long.  [To  his 
v'ife]  Be  seated;  pour  the  tea!  Brother,  sister,  have  a  cup 
of  tea. 

All  exceptiyig  Afonya  seat  themselves  at  the  table. 

KuRiTSYN.  Brother,  this  is  a  holiday  occasion,  so  it  is 
customary  before  tea  to — just  a  little.  Don't  you  drink, 
yourself  .'* 

KjiASNOV.  From  the  day  I  married  Tatyana  Danilovna  I 
stopped  all  that.  Tatyana  Danilovna,  treat  brother  and 
sister  with  some  voilka. 


SCENE  II  SIN   AND   SORROW  163 

Tatyana.  [Takes  out  of  the  cupboard  and  places  on  the 
table  decanter,  glasses,  and  refreshments]  Have  some,  sister ! 
[Ulyana  drinks]  Have  some,  brother ! 

KuRiTSYN.  That's  no  invitation,  you  don't  know  how  to 
do  it. 

Krasnov.  Brother,  don't  be  quite  so  particular !  My 
wife  doesn't  know  your  common  ways,  and  there's  no  use 
knowing  them.     Please,  without  ceremony. 

KuRiTSYN.  [After  drinking]  You  are  spoiling  your  wife, 
that's  what  I  tell  you.  Freedom  spoils  even  a  good  wife. 
You  ought  to  take  example  from  me,  and  teach  her  common 
sense;  that  would  be  lots  better.  Ask  your  sister  how  I 
trained  her;    we  had  a  hot  time  of  it. 

Ulyana.  Yes,  you,  Manuylo  Kalinich,  are  a  terrible  bar- 
barian, and  a  blood-sucker !  You  spend  your  whole  life 
bossing  your  wife  and  showing  your  authority. 

KuRiTSYN.  What  words  are  those  ?  Who's  talking  ? 
What's  that  you  say.^  [Looking  around]  Is  any  stranger 
here  ?  Seems  to  me,  my  people  in  my  own  house  don't  dare 
to  speak  that  way  ! 

Ulyana.  [With  a  start]  I  just  said  that  for  instance, 
Manuylo  Kalinich.  Because,  sister,  women  like  us  can't 
live  without  strict  discipline.  It's  a  true  proverb:  "If  you 
beat  your  wife,  the  soup  tastes  better." 

Tatyana.  Every  one  to  his  own  taste !  You,  sister,  like 
such  treatment,  while  I  consider  it  the  height  of  rudeness. 

LuKEUYA.  Nowadays,  such  peasant's  conduct  is  discarded 
everywhere;  it's  getting  out  of  fashion. 

KuRiTSYN.  You  lie  !  Such  treatment  of  women  can  never 
get  out  of  fashion,  because  you  can't  get  along  without  it. 
Brother,  listen  to  what  point  I've  brought  Ulyana.  We 
used  to  have  disputes  among  ourselves,  among  acquaintances 
or  relatives,  whose  wife  was  more  attentive;    I'd  bring  'em 


164  SIN  AND  SORROW  act  n 

to  my  house,  sit  on  the  bench,  and  push  my  foot  out,  so — 
and  say  to  wife,  "What  does  my  foot  want?"  and  she  un- 
derstood because  she'd  been  trained.  Of  course  she  at  once 
fell  at  my  feet. 

Ulyana.  Yes,  that's  so,  that  used  to  happen.  I  can  say 
that  without  shame,  to  everybody. 

Krasnov.  There's  nothing  good  in  that,  just  swagger. 

KuRiTSYN.  Ah,  brother !  Beat  your  overcoat  and  it  will 
be  warmer;   beat  a  wife — she'll  be  smarter. 

Tatyana.  Not  every  wife  will  allow  herself  to  be  beaten, 
and  the  one  that  allows  it,  isn't  worth  any  other  treatment. 

Ulyana.  Why  are  you  giving  yourself  such  airs  all  of  a 
sudden,  sister  ?  Am  I  worse  than  you  ?  You  just  wait 
awhile,  you'll  taste  all  that.     We  can  clip  your  wings,  too. 

Krasnov.  Yes,  but  be  careful. 

Ulyana.  ^Vhat  are  you  saj'ing?  Married  a  beggar  and 
you're  putting  on  airs.  Do  you  think  that  you've  married 
the  daughter  of  a  distinguished  landowner  ? 

Krasnov.  What  I  tliink — ^is  my  business,  and  you  can't 
understand  it  with  your  wits.     You'd  better  keep  still. 

Lukerya.  What  an  interesting  conversation — worth  while 
hearing ! 

Ulyana.  It  seems  to  me  she  doesn't  come  from  nobles 
but  from  government  clerks.  Not  a  very  great  lady  !  Goats 
and  government  clerks  are  the  devil's  own  kin. 

Krasnov.  I  told  you  to  keep  still !  I  shouldn't  have  to 
tell  you  ten  times.     You  ought  to  understand  it  at  once. 

KuRiTSYN.  Leave  them  alone.  I  like  it  when  the  women 
start  a  row. 

Krasnov.  But  I  don't  like  it. 

Ulyana.  What  do  I  care  what  you  like !  I'm  not  trying 
to  please  you.  My,  how  stern  you  are !  You'd  better  scold 
your  own  wife,  not  me;    I'm  not  under  your  orders;    you 


SCENE  II  SIN   AND   SORROW  165 

aren't  my  boss.  I  have  a  good  husband  who  can  boss  me, 
not  you.  I'm  not  to  blame  because  your  wife  wanders 
around  highways  and  byways,  and  flirts  with  young  gentle- 
men for  hours. 

Krasnov.  [Jumping  up]  What's  that ! 

Tatyana.  I  know  nothing  of  highways  and  byways;  I 
have  told  you,  Lev  Rodionych,  that  I  met  Valentin  Pavlych 
on  the  bank,  and  even  everything  that  we  said. 

LuKERYA.  Yes,  I  was  there  with  them. 

Ulyana.  Yes,  you're  the  same  sort. 

Krasnov.  You're  a  regular  snake  in  the  grass !  And  you 
call  yourself  a  sister.  What  do  you  want .''  To  make  trouble 
between  us  ?  You're  spiteful  because  I  love  my  wife  !  You 
may  rest  assured  that  I  wouldn't  change  her  for  anybody. 
For  thirty  years  I've  slaved  for  my  family,  labored  till  I 
sweated  blood,  and  I  thought  of  marriage  only  when  I'd 
provided  for  the  whole  family.  For  thirty  years  I  haven't 
known  any  pleasures.  That's  why  I  have  to  be  thankful  to 
my  wife,  who  has  beauty  and  education,  for  loving  me,  a 
peasant.  Formerly  I  worked  for  you;  now  I  will  work  for 
her  forever.  I'll  perish  working,  but  I'll  give  her  every 
comfort.  I  should  kiss  her  feet,  because  I  very  well  under- 
stand that  I  and  my  whole  household  aren't  worth  her  little 
finger.  Do  you  think  after  this  I  will  allow  her  to  be  abused  ! 
I  respect  her — and  you  all  must  respect  her ! 

Lukerya.  Sister  herself  understands  that  she  deserves  all 
respect. 

Krasnov.  What's  that  you  were  saying,  Ulyana.'*  If 
you're  right,  then  it's  all  up  with  me !  See  here !  I  have 
only  one  joy,  one  consolation,  and  I  should  have  to  give  it  up. 
Is  that  easy  ?  Is  it  ?  I'm  not  made  of  stone  that  I  can  look 
at  such  wifely  doings  through  my  fingers !  Your  foolish 
words  have  entered  my  ears  and  wrenched  my  heart.     If  I 


166  SIN  AND   SORROW  act  ii 

believed  you,  then — God  keep  me  from  it — ^I  should  soon  do 
some  violence !  One  can't  vouch  for  himself  as  to  what 
may  happen.  Maybe  the  devil  will  jog  my  elbow.  God 
save  us !  This  is  not  a  joking  matter !  If  you  wanted  to 
hurt  me,  you  should  have  taken  a  knife  and  thrust  it  into 
my  side — that  would  have  been  easier  for  me.  After  such 
words  it's  better  tliat  I  never  see  you  again,  you  breaker-up 
of  families.  I'd  rather  disown  all  my  people  than  endure 
your  poison. 

Ulyana.  I'm  not  the  cause  of  separation.  It's  she  that's 
breaking  up  families. 

KuRiTSYN.  Well,  brother !  Evidently,  if  it's  the  wife's 
kin — open  the  door;  but  if  it's  the  husband's  kin — then  shut 
the  door.  You  visit  us  and  we'll  show  you  hospitality. 
Come,  w' ife,  w^e'd  better  go  home ! 

Ulyana.  Well,  good-by,  sister,  but  remember !  And  you, 
brother,  just  wait;   we'll  settle  accounts  somehow. 

[They  go  out. 

SCENE    III 
Krasnov,  Tatyana,  Lukerya,  and  Afonya 

Krasnov.  [Approaching  his  unfe]  Tatyana  Danilovna,  I 
hope  you  won't  take  that  to  heart,  because  they're  a  rough 
lot. 

Tatyana.  That's  the  kind  of  relatives  you  have !  I  lived 
better  beyond  comparison  as  a  girl;  at  least  I  knew  that  no 
one  dared  to  insult  me. 

Lukerya.  [Clearing  the  table]  We  didn't  associate  with  the 
common  people. 

Krasnov.  And  I'll  never  let  you  be  insulted.  You  saw 
I  didn't  spare  my  own  sister,  and  drove  her  out  of  my  house; 
but  if  it  had  been  a  stranger,  he  wouldn't  have  got  off  alive. 


SCENE  III  SIN   AND   SORROW  167 

You  don't  know  my  character  yet;  at  times  I'm  afraid  of 
myself. 

Tatyana.  What,  do  you  become  dreadfully  furious  ? 

Kjrasnov.  Not  that  I'm  furious,  I'm  hot-tempered.  I'm 
beside  myself,  and  don't  see  people  at  such  times. 

Tatyana.  How  terribly  you  talk  i  Why  didn't  you  tell 
me  about  your  character  before  'i     I  wouldn't  have  married 

you. 

Krasnov.  There's  nothing  bad  in  a  man's  being  hot- 
tempered.  That  means  that  he's  eager  in  all  things,  even  in 
his  work,  and  he  can  love  better,  because  he  has  more  feeling 
than  others. 

Taty.^na.  Now  I  shall  be  afraid  of  you. 

Krasnov.  I  don't  want  you  to  fear  me.  But  I  should 
like  to  know  when  you  are  going  to  love  me.' 

Tatyana.  What  sort  of  love  do  you  want  to  have  from 
me.'' 

Krasnov.  You  know  yourself  what  sort;  but  maybe  you 
don't  feel  it.  What's  to  be  done  "^  We'll  wait,  perhaps  it'll 
come  later.  Everything  can  happen  m  this  world !  There 
have  been  cases  where  love  has  come  the  fifth  or  sixth  year 
after  marriage.  And  what  love !  Better  than  if  it  came  at 
first. 

Tatyana.  Keep  on  waiting. 

LuKERYA.  You're  very  hot  in  your  love;  but  we're  of  en- 
tirely different  bringing  up. 

Krasnov.  You  speak  of  bringing  up  ?  I'll  tell  you  this, 
that  if  I  were  younger,  I'd  take  up  and  study  for  Tatyana 
Danilovna.  I  know,  myself,  what  I  lack,  but  now  it's  too 
late.     I've  a  soul  but  no  training.     If  I  were  trained 

Lukerya.  [Glancing  towards  the  window]  He's  coming, 
Tanya;   he's  coming  !  [Both  run  out  of  the  room. 


168  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  ii 

Krasnov.  Where  so  suddenly  ?  What  are  you  running 
after  ? 

LuKERYA.  What  do  you  mean  ?  Recollect  yourself.  We 
must  be  courteous  and  go  to  meet  him.  [They  go  out. 

Afonya.  Brother !  You  drove  sister  away.  Whether 
right  or  not,  let  God  judge  you  !  But  I  tell  you,  you'd  better 
watch  the  gentleman. 

KjtASNOV.  What  the  deuce  have  you  got  to  do  with  this  ? 
You  hiss  like  a  snake.  You  want  to  wound  me.  Get  out  of 
here !     Go,  I  tell  you,  or  I'll  kill  you. 

Afonya.  Well,  kill !  My  life  isn't  very  sweet  to  me,  and 
I  haven't  long  to  live,  anyway.  But  don't  be  blind  !  Don't 
be  blind  !  [Goes  out. 

Krasnov.  What  are  they  doing  to  me  ?  Must  I  really  be 
on  my  guard,  or  are  they  just  frightening  me?  Where  then 
is  love !  Is  it  possible.  Lord,  that  I  have  taken  unto  me  not 
a  joy  but  a  torture !  Rouse  yourself.  Lev  Rodionych,  rouse 
yourself.  Hearken  not  to  the  fiend.  You  have  one  joy — 
he's  seizing  it,  and  draining  your  heart.  You  will  ruin  your 
whole  life !  You  will  perish  for  no  cause.  All  those  are 
slanderous  words.  They're  spiteful  because  my  wife  is  good, 
and  we  get  along  together — so  they  begin  to  stir  up  trouble. 
That's  clearly  seen.  It's  so  in  every  family.  The  best  way 
is  to  drop  it  and  not  think  about  it.  The  gentleman  will 
have  to  be  gotten  rid  of;  I  must  see  that  he  never  looks  our 
way  any  more.  "Come  oftener,"  I'll  tell  him,  "we  like  it 
better  when  you  aren't  here."  So  there'll  be  less  talk  and 
my  heart  will  be  calmer. 

Enter  Babayev,  Tatyana,  and  Lukerya. 


SCENE  IV  SIN   AND   SORROW  169 


SCENE    IV 

Babayev,  Krasnov,  Tatyana,  and  Lukerya 

Babayev.  So  this  is  where  you  Hve !  Is  this  your  own 
little  house? 

Tatyana.  Our  own.     Tliis  is  my  husband. 

Babayev.  I'm  delighted,  I've  known  your  wife  a  long 
while. 

Krasnov.  That's  your  affair. 

Babayev.  You're  in  business? 

Krasnov.  That's  my  affair. 

Tatyana.  Won't  you  be  seated  ?  [Babayev  and  Krasnov 
take  seats]  Shouldn't  you  like  some  tea  ? 

Babayev.  No,  thank  you;  I  don't  care  for  tea  now. 

Lukerya.  Ah,  Tanya,  we've  forgotten  that  now  in  St. 
Petersburg  they  have  different  tastes.  [To  Babayev]  We 
can  have  coffee  immediately, 

Babayev.  No,  please  do  not  trouble  yourself;  I've  already 
had  some.  Let  us  rather  sit  and  talk.  Are  you  happy 
here?     Have  you  any  amusements  here? 

Tatyana.  No.  What  sort  of  amusements  can  one  have 
here  ? 

Babayev.  How  do  you  spend  your  time?  Is  it  possible 
you  are  always  at  home? 

Tatyana.  Mostly. 

Krasnov.  And  that  is  proper  among  such  as  us.  Our 
Russian  way  is:  husband  and  dog  in  the  yard,  and  vv^ife  and 
cat  in  the  house. 

Lukerya.  [In  a  low  voice  to  Krasnov]  Can't  you  speak 
more  politely  ? 

Krasnov.  I  know  mv  business. 


170  SIN  AND   SORROW  act  n 

Babayev.  So  you're  a  housekeeper.  I  should  think  it 
must  have  been  hard  for  you  to  get  used  to  your  new  duties. 

Tatyana.  [Glancing  at  her  husband]  Yes;  of  course  I  can't 
say — of  course — at  first 

Babayev.  [To  Ltjkerya]  I'm  asking,  but  I  don't  really 
know  myself  what  these  duties  consist  of. 

LuKERYA.  But  considering  your  noble  birth,  that's  be- 
neath your  knowledge. 

Krasnov.  There's  nothing  vulgar  about  it. 

Babayev.  Really,  what  is  there  vulgar  in  it? 

Lukerya.  The  words  are  low  and  even  quite  coarse,  and 
they  aren't  usually  spoken  before  people  of  good  breeding. 

Babayev.  Well,  imagine  that  I'm  a  man  of  no  breeding. 
What  are  the  words,  tell  me.-^ 

Lukerya.  You're  embarrassing  Tanya  and  me.  But  if 
you're  interested  to  hear  those  words,  all  right !  The  kitchen 
and  other  common  things  belong  to  the  household:  the  fry- 
ing-pan, the  handle,  the  oven  fork.     Isn't  that  low  ? 

Krasnov.  Whether  the  oven  fork  is  high  or  low,  if  you 
put  the  soup  in  the  stove  you've  got  to  get  it  out. 

Tatyana.  You  might  spare  your  wife  before  guests. 

Krasnov.  I  haven't  insulted  you  a  hair's  breadth  either 
before  guests  or  without  guests.  When  you're  asked  what 
sort  of  a  housekeeper  you  are  for  your  husband,  right  before 
him,  then  I  should  think  you'd  answ'er,  that  you're  a  good 
housekeeper,  and  aren't  ashamed  of  your  position,  because 
among  such  as  us  that  is  the  first  duty. 

Lukerya.  [In  a  Imv  voice  to  Krasnov]  You're  disturbing 
our  conversation  with  our  guest. 

Babayev.  [In  a  low  voice  to  Tatyana]  Is  he  always  like 
this  ? 

Tatyana.  [In  a  low  voice]  I  don't  know  what's  the  matter 
with  him. 


SCENE  V  SIN   AND   SORROW  171 

Babayev.  [In  a  low  voice]  You  see  for  yourself  that  IVe 
no  business  here.  You'd  better  come  to  me  to-day,  and  I'll 
go  home  now.  [Aloud]  Well,  good-by.  I  hope  this  isn't  the 
last  time  we  meet. 

Lukerya.  Certainly,  certainly. 

Tatyana.  We  are  most  grateful  for  your  visit ! 

Krasnov.  [Bowing]  Good-by  to  you  !  Are  you  going  away 
from  here  soon  ? 

Babayev.  I  don't  know.  Whenever  my  affairs  are  set- 
tled. 

Krasnov.  But  when,  do  you  think  .^ 

Babayev.  They  tell  me,  at  court,  the  day  after  to-morrow. 

Krasnov.  So,  when  that's  over  you're  going  directly? 

Babayev.  I  think  so.     What  is  there  to  do  here.'' 

KnASNOV.  Yes,  there's  nothing  to  do  here.  My  regards 
to  you !  [Babayev,  Tatyana,  and  Lukerya  go  out]  An  un- 
bidden guest  is  worse  than  a  Tatar.  What  do  we  want  with 
him?  ^Miat  use  Is  he  to  us  ?  I  won't  have  his  help;  we 
aren't  beggars.  Well,  be  off  with  you !  Go  to  St.  Peters- 
burg, and  good  luck  to  you. 

Enter  Tatyana  and  Lukerya. 


SCENE    V 

Krasnov,  Tatyana,  and  Lukerya 

Tatyana.  What  are  you  doing.?  Why  did  you  go  and 
insult  me  so .'' 

Krasnov.  There's  no  insult !  Now,  look  here !  We 
haven't  quarrelled  once  since  our  wedding,  and  I  hope  that 
we  may  never  do  so,  but  may  always  live  in  love. 

Lukerya.  Fme  love,  I  must  say ! 

[Krasnov  looks  at  her  sharply. 


172  SIN  AND  SORROW  acth 

Tatyana.  Where  is  your  love  ?  Now  we  see  it.  very  plainly. 
I  must  serve  your  relatives  and  friends  like  a  cook;  but  when 
our  friend  came,  a  gentleman,  then  you  almost  drove  him 
away. 

LuKERYA.  You  did  drive  him  away,  only  in  a  roundabout 
fashion. 

Tatyana.  You'd  better  not  speak  of  your  love.  What 
do  I  want  with  your  love  when  you  disgrace  me  at  every 
step. 

Krasnov.  I  don't  understand  the  reason  for  this  argu- 
ment !  The  whole  affair  isn't  worth  discussing.  We  prob- 
ably won't  ever  see  him  again,  and  we  have  no  need  of  him; 
he  went  with  what  he  came.  We  have  to  live  our  life  to- 
gether; it  isn't  worth  our  having  trouble  over  him. 

Tatyana.  Ah,  Lusha,  what  a  disgrace !  I  wonder  what 
he'll  think  of  us  now  ? 

LuKERYA.  Yes.  He'll  soon  go  back  to  St.  Petersburg;  a 
fine  opinion  of  us  he'll  take  away  with  him ! 

Krasnov.  I  tell  you  again,  that  you  should  dismiss  him 
and  his  opinions  from  your  mind.  The  whole  affair  isn't 
worth  a  kopek.  I  think  that  whether  he's  alive  or  no,  it's 
all  the  same  to  us. 

Tatyana.  It  may  be  all  the  same  for  you,  but  not  so  for 
us.  Sister  and  I  have  promised  to  visit  him  and  we  want 
to  go  to-day. 

Krasnov.  There's  no  need. 

Tatyana.  How,  no  need  ?  I  tell  you  that  I  want  to  see 
him. 

Krasnov.  You  want  to,  but  I'm  not  anxious.  Ought  you 
to  consider  my  wishes  or  not? 

Tatyana.  You  seem  to  have  assumed  authority  all  of  a 
sudden.  You  certainly  don't  imagine  that  we'll  obey  you. 
— No,  indeed,  we  loont. 


SCENE  V  SIN   AND   SORROW  173 

Krasnov.  [Striking  the  table]  What  do  you  mean  by  "no, 
indeed"?  No,  if  I  tell  you  something,  then  that  has  to  go. 
I'm  talking  sense  and  what's  good  for  you,  and  that's  why  I 
give  you  strict  orders.  [Again  strikes  the  table. 

Tatyana.  [Crying]  What  tyranny  !     What  torture ! 

LuKERYA.  [With  a  laugh]  Oh,  what  a  fearful,  oh,  what  a 
terrible  man,  ha,  ha,  ha ! 

Krasnov.  What  are  you  cackling  about  ?  I'll  fire  you 
out  so  fast  that  your  skirts  will  squeak  on  the  gate. 

Tatyana.  Well,  do  what  you  like,  even  kill  us,  but  we'll 
go.  We  don't  want  to  show  him  we're  boors.  We  surely 
have  to  thank  him  for  remembering  us,  and  wish  him  a  pleas- 
ant journey. 

Krasnov.  Tatyana  Danilovna,  please  understand  what 
you  are  told. 

Tatyana.  I  hope  you  aren't  going  to  fight?  That'll  be 
just  like  you.     That's  what's  to  be  expected. 

Krasnov.  You're  mistaken.  You'll  never  see  me  do  that. 
I  love  you  so  much  tliat  this  time  I'll  even  respect  your 
caprices.  Go  along,  but  never  set  your  foot  there  again. 
Only  one  more  thing,  Tatyana  Danilovna:  you  see  this  clock  ! 
[Points  to  the  wall  clock]  Look  at  the  clock  when  you  leave, 
and  be  back  in  half  an  hour !  [Pointing  to  the  floor]  On  this 
very  spot.     Understand  ? 

Tatyana.  Come,  Lusha,  let's  dress.  [Both  go  out. 

Krasnov.  I  think  everything  will  be  all  right  now.  They 
were  a  little  spoiled;  in  that  case  sternness  will  do  no  harm. 
If  I  hold  on  she'll  come  to  love  me.  Then  when  the  gentle- 
man is  gone,  I  can  humor  her  again;  then  our  misunder- 
standing will  be  forgotten.  What  wouldn't  I  give  for  the 
half-hour  they're  with  the  gentleman  ?  But  what's  to  be 
done?  I  can't  cut  her  off  sharp — that'd  entirely  turn  her 
away  from  me.     Whatever  I  try  to  think  of,  horrid  things 


174  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  ii 

come  into  my  head.  But  he  certainly  isn't  a  bandit.  And 
tlieii  my  wife,  a  httle  wliile  aj^o — I'm  just  an  enemy  to  my- 
self! There  surely  eau't  be  anything  bad;  but  I  think  of 
all  sorts  of  nonsense !  I'd  better  go  and  have  a  chat  with 
my  friends  at  the  tavern.  What  did  he  whisper  to  her  just 
now?  Well,  they're  old  acquaintances;  just  something! 
[Takes  his  cap]  Tatyana  Danilovna !  I  pined  for  you  until 
I  married  you;  and  now  that  I  have  married  you,  all  my 
heart  aches.  Don't  ruin  me,  poor  lad  that  I  am;  it  will  be 
a  sin  for  you  !  [Goes  out. 

TABLEAU    II 

Same  room  as  in  Act  I 

SCENE    I 

Karp  and  Prokofyevna  come  in 

Prokofyevna.  Is  he  asleep.' 

Karp.  Don't  know.  I  guess  not;  he  hasn't  that  habit. 
It  isn't  time  yet,  anyway.  What  do  you  think  .f*  In  St. 
Petersburg  it  isn't  dinner-time  yet,  it's  still  morning. 

Prokofyevna.  What's  that,  good  heavens  I 

Kl-VRP.  Why,  at  times  in  the  winter,  when  it's  already 
dusk  and  the  lights  are  lit  everywhere,  it's  still  considered 
morning. 

Prokofyevna.  What's  the  wonder!  It's  a  big  city,  the 
capital,  not  like  this.  I  just  came  in  to  see  if  anytliing  was 
needed.  [Glancing  out  of  the  window]  I  believe  some  one  is 
coming  here.     I'll  go  and  meet  them.  [Goes  out. 

Karp.  One  is  bored  to  extinction  here.  If  he'd  grease 
the  palms  of  the  principal  men  at  the  court,  then  they'd 
have  done  it  in  a  jiffy.     At  least  we'd  now  be  home,  at  busi- 


SCENE  11  SIN   AND   SORROW  175 

ness.  I  wonder  how  it  is  he  isn't  bored  !  I  wonder  if  he 
hasn't  found  some  prey  here !  He  surely  doesn't  go  about 
town  for  nothing !  I  know  his  ways :  he  walks  and  walks 
past  the  windows,  and  casts  his  eye  around  for  some  brunette. 
Prokofyevna  covies  in. 

Prokofyevna.  Go  and  tell  him  that  he  is  wanted,  my  dear 
sir. 

Karp.  Why  is  he  wanted  ? 

Prokofyevna.  You  tell  liim;  he  knows  why. 

Karp.  [Through  the  door]  Please,  sir,  you  have  visitors. 

Babayev.  [From  the  door]  Who  ? 

Prokofyevna.  Come  out,  sir,  for  a  minute;  you're  wanted  ! 
Babayev  enters. 

SCENE    II 

Karp,  Prokofyevna,  Babayev 

Prokofyevna.  Listen !  Tatyana  Danilovna,  the  wife  of 
the  shopkeeper,  has  come  with  her  sister,  and  wants  to 
know  if  they  may  come  in. 

Babayev.  Ask  them  in.  I'll  tell  you  what !  Listen,  land- 
lady !  Please  avoid  gossip !  It's  possible  that  she'll  come 
again,  so  you'll  please  say  that  she  comes  to  see  you.  If 
any  one  asks  you,  you  know;  the  city  is  small,  and  everj' 
one  knows  every  one  else,  and  every  one  watches  every  one 
else,  where  each  goes,  and  what  each  does. 

Prokofyevna.  Oh,  sir !  What's  that  to  me !  I  looked 
but  I  didn't  see.     You're  a  stranger,  not  of  this  place. 

Babayev.  Ask  them  in !  You  and  I,  dear  landlady,  are 
old  friends.  [Pats  her  on  the  shoulder. 

Prokofyevna.  Indeed  we  are,  sir,  friends !         [Goes  out. 

Karp.  [With  an  im  pat  ieiit  wave  of  his  hand]  Sins!  [Goes  out 
Tatyana  and  Lukerya  come  in. 


176  SIN   AND   SORROW 


SCENE    III 

Babayev,  Tatyana,  Lukerya 

LuKERYA.  How  do  you  do,  again !  Were  you  looking  for 
us? 

Babayev.  To  be  frank.  I  didn't  expect  you  so  soon.  Be 
seated;  why  are  you  standing?  [They  all  sit  down. 

Lukerya.  We  fairly  ran  over  here.  We  had  such  a  time 
getting  away. 

Tatyana.  That's  enough,  Lusha;  stop! 

Lukerya.  There's  no  use  conceaUng  matters !  You  can't 
do  it.  Valentin  Pavlych  has  seen  our  local  gentry  to-day, 
himself.  You  should  see  what  a  rumpus  we  had  after  you 
left! 

Tatyana.  Ah,  Lusha,  those  things  happen  in  every  family; 
there's  no  need  telling  every  one!  It's  no  one's  affair  how 
we  live. 

Lukerya.  Now  you  understand,  Valentin  Pavlych,  what 
a  peasant  is  when  he  assumes  importance  ? 

Tatyana.  It's  well  for  you  to  talk,  since  you  aren't  con- 
cerned. You  might  spare  me !  He's  my  husband,  and  I 
have  to  live  with  him  till  the  brink  of  the  grave. 

Babayev.  You  weren't  careful  in  your  marriage,  Tatyana 
Danilovna;  you  weren't  careful. 

Tatyana.  How  queer  you  are !  What  are  you  reproach- 
ing me  for?  Where  were  you  when  we  had  nothing  to  eat? 
But  now  there  is  no  going  back.  All  that  remains  for  me  to 
do  is  to  cry  all  the  rest  of  my  life.  [Cries. 

Babayev.  Why  are  you  crying  now  ? 

Tatyana.  What  have  I  to  rejoice  over?  You?  I  might 
be  happy  if  I  had  freedom.  Understand  this:  on  your  ac- 
count I  quarrelled  with  my  husband;    you'll  be  going  away 


SCENE  IV  SIN   AND   SORROW  177 

to-day  or  to-morrow,  while  I  have  to  remain  with  him. 
You  only  made  matters  worse  by  coming;  until  you  came 
he  didn't  seem  so  bad,  and  suddenly  he  has  changed  entirely. 
Before  he  saw  you  he  fulfilled  my  every  wish,  he  licked  my 
hands  like  a  dog;  but  now  he  has  begun  to  look  askance  at 
me  and  to  scold.  How  can  I  endure  torment  all  my  life 
with  the  man  I  loathe !  [Cries. 

Babayev.  Now,  please  stop!  Why  do  you  grieve!  [To 
Lukerya]  Listen,  Lukerya  Danilovna !  You  go  to  the 
landlady,  I  can  calm  her  better  alone. 

Lukerya.  All  right,  but  don't  be  too  sly  !  [Goes  out. 


SCENE    IV 

Babayev  and  Tatyana 

Babayev.  [Draws  nearer  and  puts  one  arm  around  Tat- 
yana] Darling,  Tanechka,  now  stop !  Why  do  you  weep 
so !     Let's  think,  together,  how  we  can  help  your  grief. 

Tatyana.  There's  no  use  thinking !     There's  no  way. 

Babayev.  Is  that  so?  But  what  if  I  take  you  off  to  the 
village  ? 

Tatyana.  Which  one?     Where? 

Babayev.  To  my  own  village.  There  everything  is  the 
same  as  when  mother  lived:  the  same  lanes,  ponds,  and  ar- 
bors; everything  is  familiar  to  you,  and  will  remind  you  of 
the  past.     There  you'd  be  my  housekeeper. 

Tatyana.  [Freeing  herself  from  his  arm]  What  ideas  you 
do  get,  my  dear  sir !  How  could  you  get  such  a  foolish  no- 
tion into  your  head  !  Do  you  think  my  husband  would 
allow  such  a  thing !  Why,  he'd  find  me,  at  the  bottom  of 
the  sea ! 

Babayev.  For  a  time  we'll  be  able  to  hide  you  so  that  he 


178  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  u 

won't  find  you;   and  meanwhile  we  can  smooth  it  over  with 
him. 

Tatyana.  What !  Wliat !  That's  a  bright  idea !  Stop 
talking  such  nonsense !  You'd  better  advise  me  how  to  live 
with  my  husband  the  rest  of  my  life. 

Babayev.  Why  so  !     Much  I  care  for  that ! 

Tatyana.  So,  you  don't  love  me  a  little  bit !  You're  just 
making  believe  !     Yes,  that's  it ! 

Babayev.  Tanya,  isn't  it  a  sin  for  you  to  talk  so .''  Now, 
tell  me,  isn't  it? 

Tatyana.  What.^ 

Babayev.  Isn't  it  a  sin  to  suspect  me? 

Tatyana.  Oh,  you !  One  can't  tell  whether  you're  mak- 
ing believe  or  not. 

Babayev.  Why  should  you  tell,  my  angel !  Don't  worry 
about  me !     Just  ask  your  own  heart  what  it  tells  you  ! 

[Embraces  her. 

Tatyana.  But  what  does  yours  tell  you? 

Babayev.  Yes,  but,  Tanya,  you  don't  believe  me;  you 
say  that  I'm  making  believe,  and  yet  you  are  asking  ques- 
tions.    But  how  could  I  deceive  you? 

Tatyana.  You  aren't  a  bit  interested  !    You're  just  talking. 

Babayev.  Don't  be  afraid ;  I'll  not  deceive  !  Why  should 
I  deceive  you  ?  [Leans  towards  her;  she  listens  with  downcast 
eyes]  I'll  tell  you  what,  Tanya!  My  heart  tells  me  that  I 
have  never  loved  any  one  as  I  do  you.  It's  all  the  same 
whether  you  believe  me  or  not.  But  I  will  prove  that  it  is 
the  truth,  and  you  yourself  will  agree  with  me.  Why,  I 
don't  tell  you  that  I've  never  seen  women  more  beautiful 
than  you,  or  cleverer.  Then  you  might  tell  me  to  my  face 
that  I  lied.  No,  I  have  seen  more  beautiful  women  than 
you,  and  cleverer;  but  I  have  never  seen  such  a  darling, 
charming,  artless  little  woman  as  you. 


SCENE  IV  SIN   AND   SORROW  179 

Tatyana.  [Sighing]  Artless—     Ah,  you  speak  the  truth. 

Babayev.  Well,  I've  told  you  what  I  feel.  Why  don't 
you  tell  me? 

Tatyana.  What  should  I  say  ?  I  don't  know  how.  I 
might  say  more  than  you.  But  why  say  anything — you 
know  yourself. 

Babayev.  That  is,  possibly,  I  guess,  but 

Tatyana.  Why  "but".'*     There's  nothing  to  be  said! 

Babayev.  Yes,  there  is.  I  guess  the  secret  but  I  get  no 
good  from  it.  [Pause]  Tell  me  yourself  that  you  love  me ! 
Well,  how  about  it,  Tanya.'' 

Tatyana.  What  do  you  want  ? 

Babayev.  Do  you  love  me?  [Pause]  Do  you  love  me? 

Tatyana.  [Dropping  her  eyes]  Well,  yes. 

Babayev.  Very  much  ?  [Pause]  Why  are  you  silent  ?  Do 
you  love  me  very  much? 

Tatyana.  Yes. 

Babayev.  Will  you  go  to  the  village  with  me? 

Tatyana.  Ah,  stop  urging  me ! 

Babayev.  Well,  you  needn't  go  to  the  village  then.  I 
know  what  we'll  do:  I'll  rent  a  lodging  here  in  the  city,  and 
will  come  here  every  other  week.     Do  you  agree  to  that? 

Tatyana.  Yes. 

Babayev.  Now  you  see,  my  darling  Tanechka,  I'm  ready 
to  do  anything  for  you. 

Tatyana.  I  see. 

Babayev.  And  you  ?  [Pause]  Why  are  you  silent  ? 

Tatyana.  But  our  compact? 

Babayev.  What  compact? 

Tatyana.  Yesterday's.     You  remember,  on  the  bank. 

Babayev.  What's  there  to  remember?  There  wasn't  any 
compact. 


180  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  ii 

Tatyana.  Shameless,  you're  shameless !  Can  you  forget 
so  soon ! 

Babayev.  I  don't  want  to  know  of  any  compacts. 

[Embraces  and  kisses  her. 

Tatyana.  [Rising]  Oh  !     Stop,  please  ! 

Babayev.  Why  "stop"  ?     What  do  you  mean  by  "stop"  .'' 

Tatyana.  I  mean,  stop. 

Babayev.  Wliat  whims ! 

Tatyana.  No  whims  at  all,  only  please  move  a  little 
further  off. 

Babayev.  If  you're  going  to  be  so  whimsical,  then  I'll  go 
away.  I'll  drop  the  business  for  which  I  came  and  will  go 
away  immediately. 

Tatyana.  Very  well,  go. 

Babayev.  I'm  not  joking.  Karp !  [Karp  comes  in]  Pack 
up  and  then  go  order  horses. 

Karp.  Yes,  sir. 

Tatyana.  So  that's  the  way  ?  Well,  good  luck  to  you  ! 
Good-by !  [Runs  out. 

Karp.  Well,  sir,  do  you  want  me  to  pack  up  ? 

Babayev.  Pack  up,  for  where  ?  You  make  me  tired,  man  ! 
[Goes  to  the  vrindoiv]  I  wonder  if  they've  gone  home.'* 

Karp.  They  won't  leave. 

Babayev.  That's  none  of  your  business  !     Get  out ! 
Karp  goes  out;  Lukerya  comes  in. 


SCENE    V 

Babayev  and  Lukerya 

Lukerya.  Sister  has  asked  nie  to  tell  you  to  put  off  your 
going.  An  acquaintance  is  visiting  tlie  landlady;  so  you'll 
understand  that  it's  awkward  for  her  to  come  to  you.     But 


SCENE  V  SIN   AND   SORROW  181 

when  she  goes  away  sister  will  come  to  you.  She  has  some- 
thing to  talk  over  with  you. 

Babayev.  You're  very  kind,  Lukerya  Danilovna ! 

LuKERYA.  I  can't  believe  mj'  ears !  Is  it  possible  that  I 
hear  such  compliments  from  you !  [Courtesies. 


ACT    III 

TABLEAU    I 

Same  room  as  in  Act  II 

SCENE    I 

Tatyana  is  lying  on  the  bed;    Ltjkerta  com£s  in 

LuKERYA.  Tanya,  are  you  asleep  ? 

Tatyana.  No. 

LuKERYA.  Then  you'd  better  get  up !  What  are  you 
lying  around  for  all  daj'  ?  You've  been  in  bed  all  the  morn- 
ing, and  still  not  up. 

Tatyana.  What's  the  use  of  getting  up.''  What's  there 
to  do  ? 

LuKERYA.  If  you  were  only  asleep — but  to  lie  in  bed  and 
cry  just  rends  your  heart.  Better  get  up  and  let's  talk  it 
over! 

Tatyana.  [Getting  up]  Oh,  what  an  unhappy,  gloomy  day 
this  is !  [Sits  down]  How  unfortunate  I  am !  What  have  I 
done  to  myself  ?  Why  did  I  marry  ?  I've  drowned  my  hap- 
piness, simply  drowned  it ! 

LuKERYA.  Who  could  have  told.''  As  a  suitor  he  was  as 
quiet  as  water  and  as  meek  as  the  grass;  now  I  don't  know 
what  has  happened  to  him.  Why,  yesterday  I  thought  he 
was  joking  when  he  told  us  to  be  back  in  a  half-hour. 

Tatyana.  I  did,  too.  If  you  only  had  seen  how  he  pounced 
on  me,  and  how  terrible  he's  become.  He  looked  daggers 
all  the  morning,  left  without  saying  good-by,  and  now  he 
hasn't  even  come  back  for  dinner. 

182 


SCENE  I  SIN  AND  SORROW  183 

LuKERYA,  What  did  he  say  to  you  when  you  were  left 
alone  yesterday  ? 

Tatyana.  He  scolded  and  abused,  got  all  wrought  up, 
and  wept  himself;  what  didn't  he  do  !  "For  all  my  love  for 
you,"  he  said,  "I  ask  you  only  one  tiling  in  return:  soothe 
me,  give  me  back  my  peace  of  mind,  because  I  am  jealous." 

LuKERYA.  What  an  affliction  ! 

Taty.\na.  He  said  he  wasn't  jealous  of  any  one  but  this 
gentleman. 

LuKERYA.  The  idea  of  his  being  jealous  of  every  one ! 
That  would  be  a  great  idea ! 

Tatyana.  "When  that  man  leaves,"  he  said,  "then  you 
may  do  anything  you  like,  and  go  anywhere,  but  because 
you  didn't  heed  my  command,  don't  dare  cross  the  threshold 
until  he  has  left  the  city  for  good." 

LuKERYA.  What  did  you  say  to  that.^ 

Tatyana.  He  kept  shouting  but  I  kept  still  through  it  all; 
but  it  hurts  me  because  he  lords  it  over  me  so.  At  first  he 
was  sly  as  a  fox,  but  now  he  has  started  to  order  me  about, 
and  talk  to  me  in  his  vulgar,  peasant's  way.  He  doesn't  care 
that  he  has  insulted  me,  but  I've  been  crj'ing  all  day.  I 
couldn't  love  him  if  he  Idlled  me.  If  he  gave  me  freedom, 
then  I  might  have  some  aflfection  for  him;  but  now  I'll  do 
everything  he  doesn't  want  me  to,  just  for  meanness;  even 
if  I  had  wronged  him,  I  wouldn't  regret  it.  I  must  get  even 
with  him  some  way.  I  can't  fight  with  him;  I  haven't  the 
strength  for  that. 

LuKERYA.  Certainly.  He  ought  to  be  satisfied  that  you 
married  him;  and  now  he's  got  the  notion  of  watcliing  your 
deportment. 

Tatyana.  Since  yesterday  I've  begun  to  fear  him  so. 
You  won't  believe  me;   why,  I  shudder  when  he  looks  at  me. 

LuKERYA.  What  do  you  think  you'll  do  now? 


184  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  m 

Tatyana.  What's  the  use  of  thinking?  My  head's  all  in 
a  muddle.  It's  bad,  no  matter  how  you  look  at  it.  I  sold 
my  very  youth  to  one  I  cannot  love,  just  for  a  piece  of  bread, 
and  from  one  day  to  another  he  becomes  more  repulsive  to 
me. 

LuKERYA.  After  such  actions  on  his  part,  it's  no  wonder 
he's  repulsive.  Especially  when  you  compare  him  with 
others.  The  other  man  is  a  born  gentleman  in  every  sense 
of  the  word. 

Tatyana.  Now  what  shall  I  do  ?  If  I  could  break  off  all 
connection  with  Valentin  Pavlych,  I  should  be  very  glad. 
But  I  see  I  should  have  thought  of  that  before,  and  attended 
to  the  matter  earher;  but  now  it's  too  late.  It's  beyond  my 
strength. 

Lukerya.  But  he  loves  you  very  much,  Tanya. 

Tatyana.  Is  that  so.'  Oh,  bother  him.  That's  just  it; 
at  first  I  haven't  enough  sense,  then  I  have  to  cry  over  it. 
My  mother  used  to  say  to  me:  "Be  careful,  daughter,  your 
lack  of  common  sense  will  be  your  ruin." 

Lukerya.  You  want  to  see  him,  I  suppose?  I  think  he's 
waiting. 

Tatyana.  Well,  of  course.  If  it  depended  on  me,  I'd  fly 
to  him. 

Lukerya.  We'll  have  to  rack  our  brains  how  we  may 
work  that. 

Tatyana.  No  matter  how  I  rack  my  brain,  I  can't  think 
of  anything. 

Lukerya.  I  know  what,  Tanya  !  You'll  have  to  fool  your 
husband. 

Tatyana.  How  ? 

Lukerya.  We  women  couldn't  live  without  cunning,  be- 
cause we're  the  weaker  sex,  and  abused  on  all  sides. 

Tatyana.  But  what  cunning  ?     Tell  me  ! 


SCENE  I  SIN   AND   SORROW  185 

LuKERYA.  Now  that  you  and  your  luishaud  live  like  cats 
and  dogs,  he  can't  help  getting  the  notion  into  his  noddle 
that  you  don't  love  him,  but  do  love  another. 

Tatyana.  How  shall  I  manage? 

LuKERYA.  You'll  have  to  change  your  tactics.  Be  very 
submissive;  peasants  like  that.  Make  believe  that  you're 
in  love  with  him;  give  him  all  sorts  of  humbug  and  he'll 
prick  up  his  ears  at  it.  Flatter  him  with  all  sorts  of  flatteries 
— that'll  be  a  new  thing  for  him. 

Tatyana.  I'll  have  to  say  what  I  don't  feel. 

LuKERYA.  Where's  the  harm  in  that  'i  How  does  he  know 
what's  in  your  heart?  He  doesn't  need  to  understand  that 
your  action  is  make-believe,  and  not  sincere.  You'll  see, 
after  such  actions,  he'll  believe  in  you  so  much  that  even 
though  you  made  love  before  his  very  eyes,  he  wouldn't 
notice  it. 

Tatyana.  One  can't  make  such  a  sudden  change  in  one- 
self. 

LuKERYA.  It  certainly  must  be  sudden.  What's  there  to 
wait  for  ? 

Tatyana.  He's  angry  with  me  now;  how  can  I  approach 
him  ?     I  can't  beg  his  pardon  ! 

LuKERYA.  Why  pardon  ?  [She  thinks]  Do  it  this  way:  you 
tell  grandfather  Arkhip  that  you'd  like  to  make  up  with 
your  husband,  so  that  you'd  have  no  misunderstandings, 
that  you  love  your  husband,  and  that  you  feel  his  displeasure 
very  much. 

Tatyana.  Well,  I'll  try. 

LuKERYA.  It's  all  the  same  to  me !  I'm  talking  for  your 
own  good. 

Tatyana.  Go  and  bring  grandfather;  he's  sitting  in  the 
garden.  [Lukerya  yues  out]  That's  what  it  is  for  a  woman 
to  have  wits !     Even  if  she  takes  a  fancy  to  a  man  she  won't 


186  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  m 

let  anybody  guess  it.     She'll  so  fool  her  husband  that  he'll 
just  dote  on  her.     But  without  wit  one  is  lost. 
LuKERYA  comes  in  leading  Abkhip. 


SCENE    II 

Tatyana,  Lukerya,  Arkhip 

Arkhip.  Do  you  need  me?  What  do  you  want  me  for? 
Tatyana,  are  you  here? 

Tatyana.  Yes,  grandfather. 

Arkhip.  Lukerya  is  leading  me,  and  she  says:  "Grand- 
father Arkhip,  we  need  you !"  What  business  can  you  have 
of  me  in  my  old  age  ? 

Lukerya.  You  see,  grandfather,  sister  is  displeased  with 
her  husband. 

Arkhip.  Well,  what  of  that  ?  Who  is  the  judge  between 
husband  and  wife  ?     Let  them  live  as  they  wish. 

Tatyana.  What  happiness  is  there  in  living  so?  It  is 
better  to  live  in  harmony. 

Arkhip.  Then  what's  the  matter  ?  Live  in  harmony ! 
Who's  preventing  you? 

Lukerya.  You  see,  he  has  a  very  crude  manner,  and  we're 
not  used  to  it. 

Arkhip.  Wait,  don't  put  in  your  word.  She  has  a  tongue 
of  her  own.     You  tell  me,  Tatyana. 

Tatyana.  My  husband  is  now  angry  with  me  and  doesn't 
even  look  at  me;  he  thinks  I  don't  love  him,  and  in  that 
he's  mistaken. 

Lukerya.  [Motioning  to  Tatyana  to  talk]  She's  afraid  of 
his  temper. 

Tatyana.  I  love  him  as  my  duty  requires.     If  he  thinks 


SCENE  11  SIN   AND   SORROW  187 

badly  of  me,  I  don't  deserve  it.  Does  he  think  I  could  be- 
tray him  for  any  one  else  ?  I  would  never  do  such  a  thing 
in  my  life. 

LuKERYA.  And  such  a  splendid  man  !  Doesn't  she  realize 
it.' 

Tatyana.  If  I  had  wronged  him  in  any  way,  then  he 
might  scold,  and  be  done  with  it.  But  if  he'll  only  be  kind 
to  me,  then  I'll  show  him  all  respect.  I'll  indulge  him  as  he 
never  dared  hope. 

LuKERYA.  How  many  times  she's  told  me:  "I  love  my 
husband  very  much,  very,  very  much." 

Arkhip.  What  do  you  keep  backing  each  other  up  for? 
Have  you  been  plotting  together .'' 

LuKERYA.  Why  should  I  be  silent  ?  Is  it  pleasant  for  me 
to  see  that  my  sister,  whom  I  adore,  lives  in  such  discord 
with  her  husband  ?  [Sig7ials  to  Tatyana. 

Tatyana.  Grandfather  Arkhip,  I  want  to  ask  you  to  have 
a  talk  with  my  husband 

Arkhip.  Wait !  Wait !  Give  me  time — don't  take  me 
off  my  feet !  You  say  that  your  husband  is  angry  with  you  ? 
Then  you're  to  blame? 

Tatyana.  Much  I  am  to  blame ! 

Arkhip.  Much  or  little,  you're  certainly  to  blame.  You 
don't  want  to  humble  yourself;  you're  ashamed  to — so  you 
ask  me.     Is  that  so? 

Tatyana.  Yes,  grandfather  Arkhip. 

Arkhip.  Are  you  speaking  sincerely,  or  just  words  ? 

Tatyana.  Sincerely,  grandfather. 

Arkhip.  But  what's  that  to  me !  It's  not  my  business. 
If  you  lie,  then  you'll  answer  to  God !  But  I  will  speak  to 
him.  Why  not?  If  you  stop  quarrelling,  then  it  will  be 
pleasant  for  all  of  us. 


188  SIN    AND    SORROW  act  iii 

LuKERYA.  \ini  talk  to  him  to-day. 
Arkhip.  I'll  talk  to  him  when  he  comes  home. 
Enter  Afonya. 

SCENE    III 

Tatyana,  Lukerya,  Arkhip,  and  Afonya 

Arkhip.  Who  came  in  ? 

Afonya.  I,  Grandfather  Arkhip. 

Arkhip.  To-day  we  have  a  holiday,  Afonya.  Tatyana 
wishes  to  make  peace  with  her  husband,  and  to  submit  to 
him. 

Afonya.  Submit  ?  Submit  ?  Don't  believe  her.  Grand- 
father Arkhip,  she's  fooUng  you. 

Arkhip.  That's  enough  from  you ! 

Tatyana.  Why  shouhi  I  fool  you  ?     What's  the  use  ? 

Afonya.  You  came  to  your  senses  when  brother  frightened 
you  a  little.  You  ought  to  have  done  it  long  ago.  If  you're 
in  earnest,  then  drop  your  proud  ways.  You  ought  to  bow 
down  to  your  husband's  feet,  right  to  his  feet.  And  to  all 
of  us,  to  all.     You  have  wronged  all  of  us. 

Lukerya.  [In  a  low  voice]  That  would  be  entirely  too  much 
honor. 

Tatyana.  Why  should  I  bow  down  to  my  husband  ? 

Afonya.  For  everything  that  he's  done  for  you.  I  saw 
myself  how  he  kneeled  before  you  !     It's  a  shame ! 

[Covers  his  face  with  his  hands. 

Lukerya.  What  of  it,  if  he  wanted  to.'^ 

Afonya.  He's  no  worse  than  you,  yet  he  bowed  down  to 
you;  now  you  bow  down  to  him.  Make  up  to  him  for  his 
humiliation.  It  won't  hurt  you !  And  bow  down  to  all 
of  us,  even  to  our  brother-in-law  and  sister. 


SCENE  IV  SIN    AND    SORROW  189 

Tatyana.  Bowing  down  to  my  husband  has  some  sense 
in  it,  but  why  should  I  to  you? 

Afonya.  Because  brother  insulted  all  of  us  on  your  ac- 
count. On  account  of  you  our  family  has  been  broken  up. 
You're  dearer  to  him  than  anj^body,  dearer  than  all  his  own. 

Arkhip.  Calm  yourself !  Try  to  control  this  fit  of  anger  ! 
We  want  to  make  peace,  and  you  are  starting  a  quarrel 
again. 

Lukerya.  He's  not  even  her  husband,  yet  what  awful 
things  he  says !  If  you  gave  him  his  way,  he  would  make 
our  life  unbearable. 

Arkhip.  [Patting  Afonya  on  the  head]  What  do  you  ex- 
pect of  him  ?     He's  a  sick  man. 
Krasnov  comes  in. 

SCENE    IV 

Krasnov,  Tatyana,  Lukerya,  Arkhip,  and  Afonya 

Lukerya.  [In  a  low  voice  to  Arkhip]  Lev  Rodionych  is 
here. 

Arkhip.  Lev,  you  haven't  had  any  dinner  to-day. 

Krasnov.  I  had  no  time. 

Tatyana.  If  you  wish,  we'll  serve  you  now. 

Krasnov.  [Sitting  down  to  the  table]  Certainly.  I  can't  get 
along  without  eating ! 

Tatyana.  Set  the  table,  sister ! 

[Goes  to  the  kitchen.     Lukerya  sets  the  table. 

Arkhip.  Lev,  are  you  going  back  to  the  shop? 

ICrasnov.  No,  I'm  all  through  there. 

Arkhip.  Will  you  stay  at  home? 

Krasnov.  I'll  be  here  for  an  hour,  then  I  have  to  go 
across  the  river  to  make  a  collection. 

Tatayana  brings  a  plate  of  cabbage  soup,  puts  it  on 


190  SIN    AND    SORROW  act  m 

the  table,  and  goes  out  unth  Lukerya.     Krasnov, 
after  eating  several  spoonfuls,  is  lost  in  thought. 

Arkhip.  Lev !  I  can't  see  you,  but  it  seems  as  if  you 
weren't  happy. 

Krasnov.  What's  there  to  be  happy  about  .^ 

Arkhip.  Why  are  you  so  sad  ?     What's  your  sorrow  ? 

Krasnov.  It's  my  sorrow,  grandfather,  mine.  My  very 
own.     It's  for  me  to  judge  of  it. 

Arkhip.  Well,  as  you  choose !  It's  your  sorrow,  and  for 
you  to  bear.  [Pause]  If  I  say  anything,  you  know  I'm  not 
your  enemy;  if  you  scold  me,  there's  no  harm  in  it.  I've 
lived  longer  than  you,  and  I've  seen  more  sorrow;  maybe 
what  I  say  will  be  good  for  you. 

Krasnov.  It  isn't  the  kind  of  affair,  grandfather,  that 
needs  advice !     You  can't  tell  me  anything. 

Arkhip.  You're  foolish,  foolish !  How  do  you  know  ? 
Are  you  wiser  than  the  rest  of  us  ? 

Krasnov.  Please  stop.  I  can't  discuss  with  you.  What 
do  you  want.'' 

Strikes  the  spoon  agairist  the  bowl  angrily.  Lukerya 
enters,  places  a  bowl  of  mush  on  the  table,  and  goes 
out. 

Arkhip.  Your  wife  Is  wiser  than  you,  really  wiser. 

Krasnov.  If  she  were  wise  she'd  obey  her  husband. 

Arkhip.  Not  necessarily !  One  can't  be  on  one's  guard 
every  minute !  Don't  you  hold  anger  for  every  little  thing. 
One  wrong — is  no  wrong;  and  two  wrongs — a  half  wrong; 
it  takes  three  wrongs  to  make  a  whole  wrong. 

Krasnov.  What  wrongs !  All  wrongs  aren't  the  same. 
For  some  wrongs  strangling  would  be  mild. 

Arkhip.  What  makes  you  so  fierce?  Nowadays,  they 
don't  hang  a  man  even  for  highway  robbery. 


SCENE  IV  SIN    AND    SORROW  191 

Krasnov.  I  can't  even  eat  my  food. 

Arkhip.  You  have  a  terrible  temper !  I  began  to  talk 
about  your  wife;  that  wasn't  just  for  the  sake  of  saying  some- 
thing. She  came  to  her  senses  before  you  did.  [Krasnov 
listens]  "Grandfather  Arkhip,"  says  she,  "put  in  a  word 
for  me  to  my  husband!  I  love  him,"  says  she,  "but  I'm 
afraid  of  his  temper.  He  seems  to  think  me  bad  without 
any  reason.  I  wouldn't  exchange  him  for  any  one,"  says 
she.  "I'd  try  to  please  him  in  every  way,  just  so  he  for- 
gives me  and  doesn't  get  angry." 

Krasnov.  Is  that  true.'' 

Arkhip.  Have  you  gone  absolutely  crazy  ?  Do  you 
think  I'd  turn  Har  in  my  old  age?  She'd  have  told  you 
herself;  she  wants  to  bow  down  to  you  but,  you  see,  she's 
ashamed,  and  then  she's  afraid. 

Krasnov.  [Rising]  Grandfather  Arkhip,  understand  me ! 
You  know  how  I  love  her,  there's  no  need  telling !  Until 
this  happened,  we  lived  together  very  comfortably;  you  all 
saw  how  I  simply  doted  on  her.  Now  that  this  gentleman 
has  come  I  see  that  he  talks  in  too  free  and  easy  a  way  with 
her;  and  that  made  me  angry.  Would  you  believe  me,  I 
didn't  know  what  I  was  doing  or  saying.  When  she  went 
to  him,  I  waited  half  an  hour — she  didn't  return;  I  waited 
an  hour — she  didn't  return;  I  became  furious;  my  very 
teeth  began  to  chatter.  Here  I  was  imagining  all  sorts  of 
things!  Maybe  I'm  doing  her  wrong,  am  unjust  to  her; 
maybe  she  meant  nothing;  but  what  was  there  to  do.-*  I'm 
consumed  with  a  fire,  absolutely  consumed.  I  wronged  her, 
I  admit;  but  was  it  easy  for  me?  If  you'd  told  me  that 
she'd  just  died — I  don't  know  what  I'd  do  with  myself,  but 
it  would  be  easier;  then  no  one  could  take  her  from  me. 
[If'ecp*]  Some  want  money  or  reputation,  but  I  need  nothing 
except  her  love.     Give  me  the  choice:    Here,  Krasnov,  you 


192  SIN    AND    SORROW  act  m 

can  have  gold-mines  and  royal  castles,  if  you'll  only  give  up 
your  wife;  or  here,  you  can  have  a  roofless  mud  hut,  all  sorts 
of  hard  work,  but  you  may  live  with  your  wife.  I  won't 
utter  a  sound.  I'll  carry  water  on  my  hack,  just  to  be  with 
her  always.  So  listen,  grandfather !  Is  it  strange  that  with 
my  hot  temper  I  hurt  her.^  If  there's  no  love,  then  there's 
no  anger.  Hut  you  tell  me  that  she  herself  wants  to  bow 
down  to  me!  Such  happiness  can't  come  to  me  even  in  a 
dream.  Certainly  that  is  a  load  off  my  shoulders.  It  seems 
as  though  I'd  just  been  born  into  the  world  !  Thank  you, 
grandfather  Arkhip !  I  was  a  dead  man  and  you  brought 
me  to  life  again  !  I  had  such  thoughts  in  my  head  that  I 
can't  make  up  for  them  by  praying  all  my  life.  The  devil 
was  surely  near  me.  Not  only  did  he  whisper  in  my  ear, 
but — -it's  a  sin  to  say  it — [iu  a  low  voice]  he  might  have  made 
me  raise  my  arm. 

Arkhip.  What !     At  whom  ? 

Krasnov.  Well,  what's  past  is  past.  God  preserve  me 
from  such  torment  in  the  future !  I  wouldn't  wish  such  for 
my  enemy. 

Arkhip.  You'd  better  calm  your  heart ! 

Krasnov.  Ah,  grandfather !  I'd  be  glad  to,  but  one  can't 
restrain  oneself.  All  at  once  your  eyes  become  clouded,  your 
head  whirls,  it  seems  as  if  some  one  were  gripping  your  heart 
with  his  hand  and  you  can  think  only  of  misfortune  and  sin. 
You  walk  about  as  if  half  crazed,  and  see  nothing  all  around 
you.  But  now  when  your  anger  has  calmed  down,  then  you're 
at  ease,  as  if  nothing  had  happened.  [Lukerya  comes  in  and 
takes  the  howl  from  the  table]  Where's  Tatyana  Danilovna  ? 

Lukerya.  She's  there,  in  the  kitchen. 

Krasnov.  Why  in  the  kitchen  ?     What  is  she  doing  there .' 
The  kitchen  is  no  place  for  her  to  sit  in !     Call  her  in  here. 
Lukerya  goes  out. 


SCENE  V  SIN    AND    SORROW  193 

Afonya.  [In  a  low  voice  to  Arkhip]  Grandfather,  will  she 
bow  down  to  brother's  feet  or  not?     If  not,  then  I'll  leave. 
Arkhip.  As  they  please,  that's  not  our  business ! 
Enter  Tatyana  and  Lukerya. 

SCENE    V 

Krasnov,  Tatyana,  Lukerya,  Arkhip,  and  Afonya 

Tatyana.  Did  you  call  me? 

Krasnov.  Yes,  because  the  kitchen  is  no  fit  place  for  you 
to  sit  in. 

Arkhip.  I  have  spoken  to  him,  Tatyana;  now  do  as  you 
like  yourself. 

Tatyana.  Lev  Rodionych !  If  I've  done  you  any  wrong 
whatever,  please  pardon  me.  If  you  wish  it,  I'll  bow  down 
to  your  feet. 

Krasnov.  No,  why  should  you  ?  I  can  feel  it  without 
your  doing  that.  I  could  never  allow  you  to  do  that — to 
bow  down  before  me !     What  kind  of  man  would  I  be  then  ? 

Tatyana.  I'm  willing  to  do  anything,  only  do  not  be  angry 
with  me. 

Krasnov.  I  need  nothing  but  your  word.  You  gave  your 
word — that's  enough;    it's  my  duty  to  believe  you. 

Tatyana.  Then  you're  not  angry  with  me? 

Kjiasnov.  Not  at  all !  I'm  not  a  man  of  polished  man- 
ners; in  my  excitement  I  stormed — but  don't  take  it  ill  of 
me;  I  did  it  because  I  was  fond  of  you. 

Lukerya.  Oh,  stop  !     Who  could  take  it  ill  of  you  ? 

Tatyana.  I've  already  forgotten  it.  Your  words  didn't 
hurt  me  so  much  as  that  you  didn't  even  look  at  me  to-day. 

Arkhip.  Well,  now  they've  made  up !  What's  the  use  of 
thrashing  over  old  scandals !  Now  kiss,  as  you  should. 
Now  everything  will  go  on  as  it  ought. 


194  SIN    AND    SORROW  act  m 

Tatyana.  \Ye  won't  fuss  over  that,  grandfather.  I'll  be 
very  glad  to.  I  wanted  to  long  ago,  but  I  didn't  know  how 
it  would  please  Lev  Rodionych. 

Krasnov.  If  it's  a  pleasure  to  you,  it's  a  double  one  for 
me  !  [They  kiss  each  other. 

LuKERYA.  I've  always  marvelled,  Lev  Rodionych,  to  see 
how  sister  loves  you. 

Krasnov.  What's  there  to  marvel  at? 

LuKERYA.  I  know  her.  Lev  Rodionych,  better  than  you 
do.  She's  of  a  quiet  temperament  and  can't  tell  you  every- 
thing; but  you  just  ought  to  know  what  her  real  feelings  are. 

Krasnov.  That  makes  it  more  pleasant  still. 

LuKERYA.  She  would  have  liked  to  tell  you  how  much  she 
loved  you;   but  she's  so  timid  that  she  can't. 

Krasnov.  [To  his  icife]  Why  are  you  timid  with  me.'  I'm 
only  an  ordinary  man. 

LuKERYA.  We  are  so  naturally. 

Krasnov.  [To  his  icifc]  Then  be  kind  enough  not  to  be 
afraid  of  me  in  the  future.  That  would  trouble  my  con- 
science.    Am  I  a  bogie? 

Tatyana.  I'll  not  be  afraid  of  you  any  more.  Lev  Rodi- 
onych; I'll  love  you. 

LuKERYA.  Other  women  would  make  you  all  sorts  of 
promises  that  they  didn't  mean  a  bit,  but  my  sister — she's 
different. 

Krasnov.  Now  I  can  understand  you.  There  were  times 
when  I  didn't  know  just  how  to  approach  you — whether 
you'd  be  pleased  or  not ! 

Tatyana.  You  always  please  me. 

Afonya.  Come,  Grandfather  Arkhip,  let's  go  out  on  the 
street ! 

Arkhip.  As  you  wish;  come  on!  Now,  thank  God,  we 
again  have  peace  and  love.    It's  good  when  there's  agreement 


SCENE  VI  SIN    AND    SORROW  195 

in  the  house !  It's  good,  children,  good !  [Going  out]  The 
demon  has  vanished  under  the  earth,  and  God  walks  on  the 
earth !  [Goes  out. 

LuKERYA.  I  just  looked  in  here  and  now  I  must  go  some- 
where else.  [Goes  out. 

SCENE    VI 
Krasnov  and  Tatyana 

Krasnov.  [Sitting  down  on  the  bench]  Ah,  Tatyana  Dani- 
lovna,  if  God  would  only  grant  that  we  might  live  our  en- 
tire lives  in  such  harmony  as  now ! 

Tatyana.  [Sitting  doivn  beside  him]  We  will. 

Krasnov.  If  you  were  always  so  kind,  you  could  fairly 
twist  me  round  your  finger.  You  can  do  anything  with  me 
by  kindness,  Tatyana  Danilovna. 

Tatyana.  [Placing  her  hand  on  his  shoulder]  I  don't  need 
any  thing  from  you ;  I'm  satisfied  with  everything.  But  don't 
think  ill  of  me.     Why  were  you  so  jealous.'* 

Krasnov.  [Embracing  her]  So  you  were  offended  !  [Looking 
at  her  lovingly]  You're  my  dear !  Whatever  is  dear  to  one 
he  guards.  Why,  you're  dearer  to  me  than  everything  in 
the  world !  What  a  wife  you  are !  Who  else  has  such  a 
one .''  You're  the  envy  of  the  whole  city — don't  I  see  that  ? 
Who  would  want  to  lose  such  a  wife  ?  In  the  first  place,  it's 
just  like  tearing  a  piece  out  of  his  heart;  and  secondly  with 
their  taunts  and  reproaches  they  would  give  me  no  peace, 
drive  me  wild.  I  must  tell  you,  I  love  you  more  than  my 
soul,  and  I  had  no  intention  of  abusing  you,  but — how  can  I 
explain  it.'* — I  can't  help  having  notions. 

Tatyana.  Don't  have  them. 

Krasnov.  That's  all  over  now. 

Tatyana.  [Kindly]  Don't  you  insult  me  by  watching  me! 


196  SIN    AND    SORROW  act  in 

KJRASNOV.  I  tell  you  that's  all  past !  Give  me  a  good  hard 
kiss!  [They  kiss  each  other]  That's  right!  Now  tell  me  why 
you  love  me?     How  can  you  be  so  attached  to  me? 

Tatyana.  I  just  love  you,  that's  all. 

Krasnov.  No,  do  tell  me !  It  does  me  good  to  hear  it 
from  you.  I  want  to  know  what  there  is  in  me  that  could 
make  such  a  beauty  fall  in  love  with  me.  Did  I  please  you 
by  my  wit  or  by  something  else? 

Tatyana.  By  everything.  Who  could  say  anything  bad 
of  you  ?     Everybody  knows  you're  a  good  man. 

Krasnov.  And  what  else? 

Tatyana.  You're  very  kind,  and  you  don't  begrudge  me 
anything. 

Krasnov.  That's  the  talk !  [Emlyraccs  her  fervently  and 
kisses  her]  Well,  love  me  still  more  and  then  I'll  be  still  kinder. 
What  are  you  frowning  at?     Did  I  muss  you  a  little? 

Tatyana.  You're  holding  me  too  tight. 

Krasnov.  Oh,  for  the  Lord's  sake  I  I  just  can't  help  it ! 
I  squeeze  you  the  way  I  love  you.  It's  right  from  the  heart, 
no  humbug.  I  don't  suppose  you're  made  of  sugar;  you 
won't  fall  to  pieces. 

Tatyana.  That's  all  right. 

Krasnov.  I  know  you  didn't  mean  anything.  What's 
there  to  complain  of !  No  need  to  get  angry  at  such  treat- 
ment !     Isn't  that  so  ? 

Tatyana.  You  know  yourself,  why  ask ! 

Krasnov.  Such  is  life  with  a  good  woman !  Peaches  and 
cream  !  Simply  lovely  !  Nothing  on  earth  is  bettor  !  What 
is  the  reason  that  you're  so  precious  to  us  men? 

Tatyana.  I  don't  know. 

Krasnov.  It's  the  work  of  Providence — truly,  of  Provi- 
dence !  It's  beyond  our  understanding !  We  know  one 
thing,  that — -if  you're  attached  to  your  wife,  that's  enough. 


SCENE  vn  SIN    AND    SORROW  197 

If  you're  once  attached,  then  that's  all.  Now  that  we're 
friends,  the  house  might  burn  down  over  my  head.  [Kisses 
her]  To-day  I'll  go  and  collect  some  money,  and  to-morrow 
I'll  buy  you  a  new  outfit. 

Tatyana.  What  for  ?     You  don't  need  to. 

Krasnov.  If  I  say  I'll  buy  it,  then  that's  my  affair.  So 
I  do  need  to  buy  it.  You  attend  to  your  business;  comfort 
your  husband !  And  I'll  attend  to  mine.  [Looking  at  his 
ivatch]  Oh,  there's  lots  of  time !  I'd  better  go !  I  wish  I 
didn't  have  to  leave  you. 

Tatyana.  Don't  go ! 

ICrasnov.  Don't  you  really  want  me  to  go.'  Don't  act 
spoiled !  Business  before  pleasure !  If  I  don't  make  the 
collection  to-day,  I  can't  get  my  money  for  a  whole  week. 
It's  so  far  to  go,  too !  I  wish  he'd — •  Why,  it's  on  the  other 
side  of  the  river!  It'll  take  an  hour;  confound  him!  [Takes 
his  cap]  So  you  don't  want  me  to  go  ? 

Tatyana.  Of  course  not ! 

Krasnov.  Oh,  what  a  woman  you  are !  [Embraces  her]  I 
know  your  kind,  and  very  well  too !  You  just  wait  for  me 
an  hour,  you'll  live  through  it !  [Kisses  her]  Good-by  !  Other- 
wise I'd  really  be  bound  to  stay  with  you.  You  women  were 
created  for  man's  temptation  in  this  world !  ^Starts  off. 

Tatyana.  Come  back  soon  ! 

Krasnov.  I'll  be  back  'fore  you  can  count  ten  !  Speaking 
seriously,  I  can't  return  within  an  hour.  [He  goes  out. 

SCENE    VII 
Tatyana  alone 

Tatyana.  [As  soon  as  her  husband  goes]  Well,  good-by  ! 
At  last  he's  gone!  I'm  unfortunate,  unfortunate!  They 
say  one  ought  to  love  one's  husband;    l>ut  how  can  I  love 


198  SIN    AND    SORROW  act  m 

liim?  He's  vulgar,  uneducated — and  he  fondles  me  as  a 
bear  would !  Sits  there — and  swaggers  like  a  peasant;  and 
I  have  to  pretend  to  love  him,  to  humor  him;  how  disgusting  ! 
I'd  give  anything  on  earth  not  to  have  to  do  that.  But 
how  can  I  help  it !  I  have  to  submit  to  one  I  don't  love ! 
[Silence]  I  wonder  where  everybody  is  ?  Here  I  am  all  alone  ! 
Such  loneliness !  [Sits  down  at  the  window]  Even  the  streets 
are  deserted,  and  there's  no  one  to  look  at.  Where's  my 
sister.''  [Sings  softly. 

"O,  mother  I'm  sad  ! 
Sad,  my  lady ! 
My  heart  is  cast  down, 
Cast  down  and  aching; 
My  beloved  knows  not 
How  my  heart  is  bleeding." 

SCENE    VIII 

Tatyana  and  Lukerya 

LuKERYA.  What,  is  he  gone.? 

Tatyana.  Yes. 

Lukerya.  Far.'' 

Tatyana.  Across  the  river. 

Lukerya.  Will  he  be  long? 

Tatyana.  He  said,  not  sooner  than  an  hour. 

Lukerya.  Now  you  might  run  over.  I  was  just  there — 
he's  waiting.     He  leaves  to-day. 

Tatyana.  Surely  not  to-day  ?  How  can  that  be,  Lusha, 
my  dear  ?     He  didn't  tell  me.     If  I  could  only  see  him  ! 

Lukerya.  Take  my  kerchief  and  cover  yourself  all  up 
with  it.     It's  so  dark  outside  that  no  one  will  know  you. 

Tatyana.  You  think  it'll  be  all  right.'' 


SCENE  IX  SIN    AND    SORROW  199 

LuKERYA.  If  you're  afraid  of  the  wolf  don't  go  into  the 
woods.  It  isn't  far,  you  can  run  over  in  a  minute.  But 
don't  stay  too  long  ! 

Tatyana.  No,  no,  of  course  I  shan't.     [Puts  the  kerchief  on. 

LuKERYA.  You'd  better  be  watching  out !  God  forbid 
that  Lev  Rodionych  should  return  first.  What  should  I  do 
then  !  Shall  I  say  that  you  went  for  some  thread  to  a  neigh- 
bor.''  It'll  be  lucky  if  he  believes  it.  What  did  you  say  to 
him  when  you  were  alone.'' 

Tatyana.  What  did  I  say — I  don't  know;  and  what  I'm 
doing  now — I  can't  understand. 

LuKERYA.  Well,  run  along  !  run  along  ! 
Tatyana  goes  out. 

SCENE    IX 

Lukerya  and  later  Afonya 

LuKERYA.  [At  the  window]  Just  look  at  her !  She's  flying 
like  an  arrow.  Who'd  scheme  for  her  if  I  didn't  ?  She's  a 
pretty  girl,  only  she  hasn't  any  sense,  and  that's  bad.  She 
has  to  be  taught  everything;  she  has  to  be  looked  after  as 
though  she  were  a  small  child.  If  I  hadn't  advised  her  to 
make  up  with  her  husband,  what  would  have  happened  .'* 
Quarrel  and  abuse.  She  probably  wouldn't  have  wanted  to 
give  in;  then  there'd  have  been  a  continual  squabble  in  the 
house  and  scandal  among  the  neighbors.  But  now  she  can 
do  as  she  likes;  everything  will  be  smoothed  over. 
Enter  Afonya. 

Afonta.  Where  is  Tatyana .''     Where  is  she,  where  is  she  ? 

Lukerya.  What  do  you  want  her  for.? 

Afonya.  I  need  her.     Tell  me,  where?     Tell  me,  where? 

Lukerya.  Probably  in  the  garden. 


200  SIN    AND    SORROW  act  m 

Afonya.  Why  are  you  fooling  me  ?  For  once  in  your  life 
tell  the  truth  !     Has  she  gone  ?     Speak,  has  she  gone  ? 

LuKERYA.  Maybe  she  has  gone. 

Afonya.  Did  she  just  slip  out  of  the  gate.^ 

LmcERYA.  Probably  it  was  she.  Wasn't  it  for  thread  she 
went  ?  She's  been  wanting  to  run  over  to  the  neighbor's 
for  some  time. 

Afonya.  For  thread  ? 

LuKERYA.  Well,  yes,  for  thread. 

Afonya.  You  lie,  lie ! 

LuKERYA.  Leave  me  alone !  Why  are  you  worrying  me .' 
Why  did  you  leave  grandfather? 

Afonya.  That's  none  of  your  business.  I  know  where 
she  went.  You're  devils.  You've  deceived  brother.  I 
saw  it  long  ago  in  your  eyes;  in  your  eyes  flames  flickered, 
devilish  flames ! 

LuKERYA.  My,  but  you're  a  malicious  imp ! 

Afonya.  You  just  wait,  just  wait !  You'll  get  sick  of  de- 
ceiving us;   I'll  show  you  up. 

LuKERYA.  Don't  threaten  !     We're  not  afraid  of  you. 

Afonya.  [With  tears]  Heavens !  My  God !  What's  all 
this  ?  What  a  man  it  is  they're  deceiving  before  his  very 
eyes !  [Runs  out. 


ACT    IV 

TABLEAU    I 

A  street  before  Prokofyevna's  house.     Twilight 

SCENE    I 
Ulyana  and  Prokofyevna  come  out  of  the  gate 

Prokofyevna.  What  is  it,  Ulyana !  What  is  it !  How 
is  it  possible !  Don't  think  of  such  a  thing !  You  just 
imagined  it.     Believe  me,  you  just  imagined  it. 

Ulyana.  Say  what  you  like  about  imagining !  Thank 
Heaven,  I'm  not  blind  yet.  Not  to  recognize  her !  Why, 
I'd  pick  her  out  of  a  thousand  by  her  dress.  We  have  only 
one  style  for  our  clothes;  on  holidays  we  don't  wear  the 
clothes  she  does  on  week-days.  You  and  I  were  just  coming 
out  of  the  door,  and  she  was  just  going  in  to  see  him. 

Prokofyevna.  I  tell  you  it's  a  mistake.  It's  true,  she 
isn't  without  faults.  There's  a  woman  here  who  comes  to 
him,  and  looks  like  her,  but  it  isn't  she.  What's  that  to 
me!  Wouldn't  I  tell  you.f*  But  if  it  isn't  true,  then  why 
talk  nonsense  ? 

Ulyana.  You're  just  helping  them  out. 

Prokofyevna.  Don't  tell  wrong  stories,  Ulyana;  don't 
tell  wrong  stories ! 

Ulyana.  But  where's  the  wrong,  Prokofyevna !  She's 
equal  to  it;  because  I  know  her.  It's  too  bafl  l)r()ther  has 
given  her  so  much  freedom.  I  wouUhi't  have  thought  of 
saying  such  a  thing  of  another,  but  it  isn't  a  sin  to  say  it  of 
her.     If   not   to-day   then    to-morrow   she'll   begin   to   raise 

201 


SIN    AND    SORROW  act  iv 

trouble  that  will  never  come  to  an  end.     She'll  hoodwink 
brother.     If  you  only  knew  how  she's  insulted  me. 

Prokofyevna.  Is  that  so  ? 

Ulyana.  May  I  die  in  my  tracks  if  she  didn't !  She's 
changed  brother  so  that  now  he  fairly  growls  at  me.  "I 
won't  have  anything  to  do  with  you,"  says  he.  That's  the 
sort  she  is  !     Just  you  wait,  my  dear !     I'm  not  like  some. 

Prokofyevna.  That's  enough  for  you !  What's  the  good 
of  your  mixing  in !  She's  the  mistress  in  her  house,  and 
you  are  in  yours. 

Ulyana.  To  the  deuce  with  her  !  I've  nothing  to  do  with 
her.  But  it  hurts  me,  Prokofyevna,  that  she  upsets  brother, 
and  estranges  him  from  his  whole  family. 

Prokofyevna.  Well,  that's  your  business;  you'll  settle 
accounts  somehow.     Are  you  going  home  now.'' 

Ulyana.  Yes,  my  dear;  it's  supper-time.  My  boss  is 
probably  storming  and  pacing  the  floor  by  now.  Come  and 
see  us ! 

Prokofyevna.  Good-by. 

They  kiss  each  other.     Prokofyevna  goes  out  through 
the  gate. 

SCENE    II 

Ulyana  and  later  Afonya 

Ulyana.  Who  knows  whether  Prokofyevna  was  lying  or 
not.  You  can't  believe  her;  she's  a  rogue.  I'd  give  a  lot 
to  find  out  for  certain  if  she's  now  with  the  gentleman  or 
not.  Will  it  hurt  to  wait?  If  she  stays  long,  my  husband 
will  make  such  a  fuss  that  I  won't  forget  it  for  a  month  of 
Sundays.  You're  lucky  that  I'm  in  a  hurry,  or  I'd  watch 
out  for  you.  [Goes  out.  She  meets  Afonya]  Afonya,  where 
are  you  going? 


SCENE  III  SIN    AND    SORROW  203 

Afonya.  Go  away,  leave  me  alone !     Leave  me  alone ! 

Ulyana.  Is  Tatyana  at  home? 

Afonya.  No,  she's  gone. 

Ulyana.  Then  she's  here  at  the  gentleman's;  I  just  saw 
her. 

Afonya.  At  the  gentleman's  '^  Heavens !  Have  people 
no  sense  of  shame  ! 

Ulyana.  I've  got  to  run  home;  I'll  tell  my  husband,  then 
I'll  call  at  your  house.  [Going  aivay]  Wait,  brother,  wait ! 
I'll  get  even  with  you  for  your  insults  !  [Goes  out. 

Afonya.  Heavens  !  I  haven't  any  strength  !  How  is  one 
to  live  in  such  a  world .''  This  is  a  punishment  for  our  sins  ! 
Left  her  husband  for  a  stranger !  She  was  sitting  in  a  corner 
starving;  we  took  care  of  her,  gave  her  fine  clothes  bought 
with  hard-earned  money !  Brother  denies  himself,  denies 
his  family,  and  gives  her  cash  to  buy  rags,  and  now  she  and 
a  stranger  are  cursing  us  for  the  shelter  we  gave  her.  It 
makes  me  sick !  Why  don't  I  die !  I'm  shedding  tears  of 
blood.  We've  warmed  a  viper  in  our  bosom.  [Leans  against 
the  fence]  I'll  wait,  I'll  wait.  I'll  tell  her  everything,  every- 
thing that's  seething  in  my  heart. 

Babayev  and  Tatyana  come  out  of  the  gate ;  Afonya 
hides  behind  a  corner. 

SCENE    III 

Afonya,  Babayev,  and  Tatyana 

Babayev.  What  are  you  afraid  of.-*  There's  not  a  soul 
on  the  street.  Why  are  you  in  such  a  hurry  ?  It  isn't  half 
an  hour  since  you  came. 

Tatyana.  No,  no !     Somehow  I  feel  uneasy. 

Babayev.  I  don't  understand  why  you  are  so  afraid. 
Well,  your  husband  will  scold  and  that's  all. 


204  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  iv 

Tatyana.  I  was  late  the  time  before;  how  terribly  he 
acted;  I  thought  he'd  kill  me.  He  makes  me  afraid,  fright- 
fully afraid  !  [Silence]  Shall  you  return  soon  ? 

Babayev.  In  a  week,  in  ten  days  at  most. 

Tatyana.  Oh,  how  has  this  come  about !  Oh,  if  we  had 
what  we  wanted :  you'd  go  to  the  country — and  I'd  go  there 
too;   you'd  go  to  St.  Petersburg — and  I'd  follow  you. 

Babayev.  I  asked  you  to  come  with  me. 

Tatyana.  It's  all  right  for  you.  You're  a  free  man,  while 
I'm  no  better  than  a  captive.  That's  my  trouble.  I've 
thought  more  than  once  how  I  could  run  away  to  you. 

Babayev.  That's  good. 

Tatyana.  Just  think  how  unfortunate  my  life  is:  in  order 
to  have  a  little  pleasure  I  have  to  deceive  my  husband.  It's 
all  deceit  and  deceit !  But  what's  the  use  of  deceiving  .'*  It 
disgusts  me;  it's  not  in  my  character.  If  my  husband 
guessed  that  I  didn't  love  him,  then  he'd  kill  me  with  scold- 
ing and  reproaches.  I  very  well  understand  that  I  can't  be 
a  real  wife  to  him,  and  that  I'm  not  wanted  by  his  familj^; 
and  they'd  rather  I  were  anywhere  else;  but  who  can  I 
explain  that  to,  who'd  understand  it !  Just  see  how  rough 
and  stern  they  are,  and  I'm  not  used  to  sternness.  What 
a  life,  when  there's  no  freedom  ! 

Babayev.  Tanya,  I'll  tell  you  what  to  do !  Tell  him  out- 
right that  you  don't  want  to  live  with  him.  You  and  your 
sister  rent  a  house,  and  I'll  send  you  the  money. 

Tatyana.  That's  impossible.  Not  to  be  thought  of ! 
Do  you  think  he'd  let  me  go.''  He  doesn't  care  if  I  die — 
so  long  as  I'm  with  him — before  his  eyes.  It  would  be  better 
for  me  to  leave  quietly. 

Babayev.  Very  well,  leave  quietly. 

Tatyana.  Really,  I  don't  know.  We're  all  brave  when 
it's  a  matter  of  words,  but  when  it  comes  to  action,  then 


SCENE  III  SIN   AND   SORROW  205 

you  lose  your  reason,  especially  such  as  I.  Do  as  you  wish. 
I'll  do  as  you  advise  me.  If  you  love  me,  you  won't  want 
to  cause  my  ruin. 

Babayev.  Of  course  not. 

Tatyana.  They're  right  when  they  say  that  all  women  are 
insane;  I  married  of  my  own  accord — nobody  forced  me — 
so  now  I  ought  to  live  according  to  my  vows;  but  I'm  drawn 
to  you,  and  want  to  escape  from  my  home.  It's  all  your 
fault,  Valentin  Pavlych;  home  has  become  disgusting  to  me 
because  of  you.  If  it  weren't  for  you,  I'd  manage  to  live 
somehow  with  my  husband;  at  least  I  shouldn't  know  this 
sorrow. 

Babayev.  A  fine  life  !     You  have  much  to  regret ! 

Tatyana.  But  is  my  life  agreeable  now  ?  Of  course  I 
ought  not  to  blame  you  much,  because  I'm  entirely  to  blame 
myself.  You  have  nothing  to  worry  about !  Yours  is  a 
man's  affair,  and  no  one  will  condemn  you;  but  we  have  to 
suffer  for  every  single  thing.  But  what's  to  be  done !  It's 
too  late  to  argue  who's  in  the  riglit  and  who's  to  blame;  but 
I  guess  this  affair  had  to  happen.  But  don't  you  deceive 
me;  come  back ! 

Babayev.  Oh,  stop;  what  do  you  mean!  Certainly  I'll 
come  back. 

Tatyana.  [Kissing  him]  Good-by !  It's  time  for  me  to 
go !  My,  how  I'm  shivering !  My  legs  fairly  totter  under 
me. 

Babayev.  Calm  yourself  a  little.  Come,  I'll  walk  along 
the  bank  with  you;  you'll  get  home  in  time.         [They  go  out. 

Afonya.  So  this,  brother  Lev,  is  what  you  deserted  us 
for !  Just  look,  and  enjoy  it !  You  act  like  a  wild  beast 
to  those  who  love  you  with  their  whole  soul.  I'm  burning 
up  like  a  candle,  I'm  wasting  away  because  of  love  and  jMty 
for  you,  and  yet  I  haven't  once  heard  a  kind  word  from  you. 


206  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  iv 

You  doted  on  your  wife,  and  see  what  she's  up  to,  the  wretch  ! 
No,  there's  no  truth  in  the  workl,  none.  [Goes  out. 


TABLEAU    II 

Same  room  as  in  Act  III 

SCENE    I 

LuKERYA  enters  with  a  candle  and  places  it  on  a  table;   later 
Afonya  comes  in. 

LuKERYA.  Why  doesn't  Tanya  return !  It's  high  time. 
She's  insane!  She's  just  glad  that  she  got  out  of  here;  she 
doesn't  realize  that  suddenly,  when  you  least  expect  it,  her 
husband  may  return.  Here  I  am  on  pins  and  needles. 
When  I  hear  any  one  at  the  door  my  heart  almost  stops. 
Every  minute  seems  a  year.  Afonya  torments  me  too.  I 
wonder  where  he  went.  Isn't  he  spying  on  her?  Of  course 
I  can  find  ten  replies  to  every  word  he  says;  yet  he  may 
rouse  suspicion.  Ah,  some  one  is  coming !  Is  it  possible 
that  it's  Lev  !  Heaven  forbid  !  I  do  believe  I'll  die.  [Afonya 
comes  in,  and,  groaning,  lies  doivn  on  the  stove-couch]  Where 
have  you  been  ? 

Afonya.  Never  you  mind. 

LuKERYA.  Speak,  it  won't  hurt  your  voice. 

Afonya.  I  don't  want  to  talk  to  you. 

LuKERYA.  [Caressingly]  Don't  you  feel  well,  Afonya? 

Afonya.  Oh,  Heavens !  don't  touch  me,  don't  touch ! 
You  can't  fool  me. 

LuKERYA.  I  don't  in  the  least  wish  to  fool  you. 

Afonya.  You  fooled  brother,  but  you  can't  fool  me.  No, 
no ! 


SCENE  II  SIN   AND   SORROW  207 

LuKERYA.  I  don't  understand  a  bit  what  you're  talking 
about. 

Afonya.  Oh,  I'm  exhausted  !  Go  away:  out  of  my  sight. 
Don't  torment  me. 

LuKERYA.  You  feel  worse  because  you  don't  appreciate 
kindness. 

Afonya.  I  don't  need  it !     I  don't  need  anything. 

LuKERYA.  Well,  then  just  lie  on  your  couch.  Do  you 
think  I  want  anytliing  from  you  ?  I  only  spoke  out  of  sym- 
pathy. [Silence]  What  a  senseless  girl ;  how  senseless !  I'm 
all  a-tremble. 

Krasnov  comes  in. 

SCENE    II 

The  same  and  Krasnov 

Krasnov.  Well,  here  I  am.  What  a  trick  I've  played ! 
The  joke's  on  Tatyana  Danilovna.  "Expect  me  in  an 
hour,"  I  said,  and  here  I  am  in  half  an  hour,  so  she'd  be 
surprised.  I  was  invited  to  tea,  but  I  didn't  stay.  "Do 
you  think  I  want  tea,"  I  said,  "when  I  have  a  young  wife 
at  home  who's  waiting  for  me!"     But  where  is  she.^ 

LuKERYA.  I  don't  know.  Somewhere  around.  Isn't  she 
in  the  garden  ? 

Krasnov.  Send  her  in  right  away,  I  want  to  give  her  a 
present  for  her  kindness  to-day. 

LuKERYA.  Right  away,  right  away.  [Goes  out. 

Krasnov.  [Paces  up  and  doum  in  silence;  then  speaks  to 
himself]  Fifty-seven  rubles,  six  and  three,  nine  to  Peter 
Ananyev.  [Pause]  Has  she  disappeared  ?  [Paces  up  and 
dotcn  in  silence]  Afonya,  do  you  know  where  my  wife  went  ? 

Afonya.  Don't  know.     Oh,  I  feel  sick. 

Krasnov.  What's  she  dallying  around  for?  [Goes  to  the 


208  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  iv 

door]  Tatyana  Danilovna !  Lukerya  Danilovna !  They 
don't  even  answer.  What  does  that  mean  now?  Afanasy, 
where's  my  wife? 

Afonya.  Are  you  lonesome  without  her?  She'll  come, 
don't  be  afraid.  No  matter  where  she's  strolling,  she'll  come 
home. 

Kkasnov.  [At  the  door]  Tatj'ana  Danilovna ! 
Ulyana  comes  in. 

SCENE    III 
The  same  and  Ulyana 

Kbasnov.  Who's  that?     Is  that  you,  Ulyana? 

Ulyana.  Yes,  brother. 

Krasnov.  W' hat  do  you  want  ? 

Ulyana.  Just  to  call  on  you,  brother,  as  a  relative  should. 

Krasnov.  I'm  in  no  great  need  of  your  calls. 

Ulyana.  My  feelings,  brother,  are  different  from  yours; 
I  can't  help  remembering  my  kindred.     Where's  your  bride? 

Krasnov.  She  seems  to  have  gotten  lost  somewhere  here. 
I  keep  calling  her,  but  can't  raise  her. 

Ulyana.  Maybe  she's  far  away  from  here,  so  she  can't 
hear  your  call 

Krasnov.  W'hat  do  you  mean  by  "far"  ?  I  tell  you  she's 
at  home. 

Ulyana.  Who  said  that?  Wasn't  it  her  sister,  Lukerya 
Danilovna  ? 

Krasnov.  Yes,  maybe  it  was  she. 

Ulyana.  And  you  believed  her.     Oh,  you're  simple,  simple  ! 

Krasnov.  Go  away,  sister !     Keep  out  of  trouble  ! 

Ulyana.  Come  to  your  senses;  what  are  you  shouting  for  ? 
I  saw  with  my  own  eyes  how  she  went  to  the  gentleman. 

Krasnov.  So  that's  the  kind  of  family  I  have !     My  luck 


SCENE  IV  SIN   AND   SORROW  209 

sticks  in  their  throats.  You're  a  barbarian,  you  jealous 
woman.  To  kill  you  would  be  small  penalty  for  your  cursed 
tongue  !  [Raises  hw  arm.  to  strike  her. 

Afonya.  [Getting  up  from  the  couch]  Q\x\QteT,  yon;  quieter! 
What  are  you  making  a  row  for? 

Ejiasnov.  I'll  hang  you  both  on  the  same  poplar ! 

Afonya.  [Shielding  his  sister]  Don't  touch  her,  don't  lay 
a  finger  on  her !     She's  telling  the  truth,  the  absolute  truth. 

Krasnov.  You  lie,  you're  jealous,  both  of  you  !  It  isn't 
an  hour,  I  tell  you;  it  isn't  an  hour  since  we  sat  here,  kissing 
and  embracing,  looking  into  each  other's  eyes  and  couldn't 
get  enough  of  it. 

Ulyana.  Heavens,  he's  out  of  his  head !  You've  lost 
your  mind !     Go  and  see  for  yourself  if  you  don't  believe  us. 

Krasnov.  [At  the  door]  Lukerj^a  Danilovna ! 

Ulyana.  Call,  call;    she  ran  over  there,  too. 
Enter  Kuritsyn. 

SCENE    IV 

The  same  and  Kuritsyn 

Kuritsyn.  What  are  you  yelling  for,  are  you  teaching 
your  wife  ?  That's  good  for  her,  so  she  won't  run  away  from 
home. 

KnASNOV.  But  where  is  she?  Where  is  she?  Spare  me; 
you're  tearing  me  to  pieces. 

Kuritsyn.  She'll  come  back;  she  doesn't  spend  the  night 
there. 

Ulyana.  You'd  better  calm  yourself,  brother;  sit  down. 

Kuritsyn.  We'll  all  wait  for  her,  the  lady. 

Krasnov.  She  petted  me,  fondled  me,  pressed  me  close 
to  her  heart. 

Tatyana  enters  quietly  and  looks  around. 


210  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  iv 

SCENE    V 

The  same  and  Tatyana 

Krasnov.  Where  have  you  been  ?  Have  you  had  a  good 
time?  Speak,  don't  hide  it !  Why  are  you  silent?  Speak! 
You  see:    everybody  has  come  to  view  my  shame. 

Ulyana.  Why  don't  you  talk,  you  shameless  creature ! 
You  think  you  can  get  out  of  it  by  silence  ?  We  saw  how  you 
went  over  there  and  came  back. 

KxjRiTSYN.  Trample  on  her,  brother,  trample  on  her  hard; 
she'll  talk. 

Krasnov.  Don't  torment  me !  Tell  me,  what  am  I  to 
think  of  you  ?  What  ?  Are  these  people  Ij'ing  ?  Then  I'll 
turn  'em  out,  head  over  heels  !  Or  maybe  they're  telling  the 
truth  ?  Deliver  me  from  mj^  sinful  thoughts !  Tell  me, 
which  of  you  is  my  enemy  ?     IFere  you  there  ? 

Tatyana.  What's  the  use  of  lying,  since  you've  all  seen 
me.     I  was  there. 

Krasnov.  [Beside  himself]  There,  good  people,  there — 
that's  how  it  is !  What  shall  I  do  now  ?  What  can  I — - 
pardon  me,  a  sinner,  for  doing  you  wrong !  How  other 
men's  wives  behave,  I  don't  know;  but  this  is  the  way  in 
our  family, 

Ulyana.  Now  we'll  watch  your  pride.  How  will  you 
show  yourself  among  people  now,  shameless  woman  ?  You've 
disgraced  our  brother,  disgraced  him ! 

Afonya.  Viper,  viper ! 

KuRiTSYN.  What's  the  use  of  looking  at  her !     She  ought 
to  pay  the  penalty  right  off. 
Arkhip  comes  in. 


SCENE  VI  SIN  AND   SORROW  211 

SCENE    VI 

The  same  and  Arkhip 

Arkhip.  What  punishment  has  God  sent  us  ?  Wiy  so 
much  noise?     Is  there  a  fire?     You  know  I  can't  see. 

Ulyana.  The  sweet  bride  has  been  up  to  mischief !  If  I 
were  in  brother's  place,  I'd  take  her  and  crush  her. 

Krasnov.  Away,  away !  Don't,  don't  anybody  lay  a 
finger  on  her !  I'm  her  husband,  so  I'm  her  judge.  Now 
tell  me,  whj'  did  you  do  it .''  Why  did  you  go  astray  ?  Were 
you  drawn  into  the  net  of  sin  ?  Perhaps  you  didn't  dream 
of  such  a  thing  of  your  own  accord.  Perhaps  you  didn't 
expect  it .'  Or  did  you  rush  into  sin  of  j'our  own  free  will  ^ 
How  about  you  now  ?  Do  you  repent  or  not  ?  Or  maybe 
you  think  that  was  the  right  thing  to  do  ?  Speak  !  Why  are 
you  silent.'  Are  you  abashed  before  people,  or  are  you 
happy  ?  Are  you  ashamed,  or  are  you  glad  of  what  you've 
done?  Are  you  made  of  stone?  Roll  at  every  one's  feet, 
crucify  yourself !  Or  will  you  tell  me  outright  that  you  did 
it  to  spite  me !  I  want  to  know  what  to  do  with  you — spare 
you,  or  kill  you.  Did  you  love  me  at  least  a  little  bit;  is 
there  any  reason  for  my  sparing  you  ?  Or  did  you  cheat  me 
all  the  time  ?     Did  I  only  dream  of  happy  days  ? 

Tatyana.  [With  tears]  I'm  guilty.  Lev  Rodionych.  I  de- 
ceived you.  I  never  loved  you,  and  don't  love  you  now. 
You'd  better  leave  me,  rather  than  have  both  of  us  suffer. 
Better  that  we  part ! 

Krasnov.  How  part  ?  Where  shall  we  go  ?  No,  you  lie  ! 
Whom  shall  I  punish  for  my  shame?  You  say  you  don't 
love  me,  and  never  did,  while  I  went  around  town  and 
boasted  that  a  beautiful  lady  loved  nie.  How  shall  I  take 
revenge  for  this  insult  ?     Go  in  the  kitchen !     You  can't  be 


212  SIN   AND   SORROW  act  m 

a  wife,  so  be  a  cook !  You  couldn't  walk  hanfl  in  hand  with 
your  husband,  so  fetch  water  for  him.  You  have  aged  me 
in  a  day,  and  now  I'll  make  sport  of  your  beauty !  Every 
day  that  the  fair  sun  rises,  you'll  get  nothing  from  me  but 
slaps  and  curses  all  your  life;  maybe  some  time  when  I'm 
angry,  I'll  kill  you  like  a  dog.  Some  one  give  me  a  knife ! 
Tatyana  runs  out. 

Afonya.  Brother  !  brother  !     She's  going,  she's  going  away. 

Krasnov.  She  won't  escape  me ! 

Afonya.  She's  going  to  the  gentleman.  I  heard  them 
planning  to  go  away  to  the  country. 

Krasnov.  Who'll  take  her  from  me,  if  I  won't  give  her 
up .''  Who  in  the  whole  world  is  strong  enough  to  take  her 
from  me  ?     If  they  take  her  they'll  have  to  tear  my  arms  off. 

Afonya.  [Looking  out  of  the  door]  Brother,  she's  getting 
ready  !     She's  leaving,  brother  ! 

Krasnov.  [Pushing  him  aside]  Stand  aside !  A  woman 
leaves  her  husband  only  for  the  grave,  for  nowhere  else ! 
[Goes  out.  The  cry  of  Tatyana  is  heard:  "Let  me  go!" 
He  comes  back]  Bind  me !     I've  killed  her. 

Afonya.  Serves  her  right. 

Ulyana.     Ah,  my  dear  !     What  will  happen  to  you  now  ? 

Arkhip.  Where  is  he.^  Where  is  he.''  [Afonya  leads  him] 
What  have  you  done.^  Who  gave  you  the  right?  Is  she 
guilty  only  towards  you  ?  First  of  all,  she  is  guilty  before 
God;  and  you,  a  proud  and  wilful  man,  have  taken  it  upon 
yourself  to  judge .''  You  couldn't  wait  for  the  merciful  judg- 
ment of  God;  so  now  go  to  the  judgment  of  man,  yourself! 
Bind  him ! 

KuRiTSYN.  He  didn't  expect  it,  he  didn't  foresee  it,  but 
he  fell  into  sorrow !  Sorrow  walks  not  through  the  woods, 
but  among  men. 


IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  — WE'LL 
SETTLE  IT  OURSELVES 

A    COMEDY    IN    FOUR    ACTS 


CHARACTERS 

Samson  Silych  Bolshov,^  a  merchant 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna,  his  wife 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna  (Lipochka),  their  daughter 

Lazar  Elizarych  Podkhalyuzin,^  a  clerk 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna,  a  professional  match-maker 

Sysoy  Psoich  Rispolozhensky,^  a  lawyer 

FoMfNisHNA,  housekeeper  1   .    „  ,    ,    , 

r„,  .  ,  }  in  BoLSHov  s  house 

Tishka/  hoy  ) 

'  Samson  Strengthson  Bigman.  '  Sneaky. 

'  Unfrocked.  *  A  Dickname  for  Tikhon. 


IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  — WE'LL 
SETTLE   IT   OURSELVES 

ACT   I 

Drawing-room  in  Bolshov's  house 

SCENE    I 
LiPOCHKA  i.s  sitting  near  thie  window  with  a  hook 

LiPOCHK-\.  Wliat  a  pleasant  occupation  these  dances  are ! 
Very  good  indeed !  What  could  be  more  delightful  ?  You 
go  to  the  assembly,  or  to  somebody's  wedding,  you  sit  down, 
naturally,  all  beflowered  like  a  doll  or  a  magazine  picture. 
Suddenly  up  runs  a  gentleman:  "May  I  have  the  happiness, 
miss?"  Well,  you  see,  if  he's  a  man  of  wit,  or  a  military 
indi%"idual.  you  accept,  drop  your  eyes  a  little,  and  answer: 
"If  you  please,  with  pleasure  I"'  Ah  I  [Warmly]  Most  fas- 
ci-nat-ing !  Simply  beyond  understanding  I  [Si^ghg]  I  dis- 
like most  of  all  dancing  with  students  and  goverr  -  -e 
clerks.  But  it's  the  real  thing  to  dance  with  ^■„.  ^■:::^l 
Ah,  charming !  ravishing  I  Their  mustaches,  and  epaulets, 
and  uniforms,  and  on  some  of  them  even  spins  with  little 
bits  of  beUs.  Only  it's  kiUingly  tiresome  that  th^  don't 
wear  a  sabre.  Why  do  thev  take  it  off?  It's  sbange, 
plague  take  it  I  The  soldios  themsdve-  :  r'- 
how  much  more  fascinatin^y  they'd  >*.::.  I' 
take  a  look  at  the  spurs,  the  way  "  if 
a  uhlan  or  some  <xAaasi  or  ott-- 

It's  just  splendid  to  look  at  ti-_-  __  :-. ;  .  ^: 

•215 


216         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

fasten  on  a  sabre,  you'd  simply  never  see  anything  more  de- 
lightful, you'd  just  hear  rolling  thunder  instead  of  the  music. 
Now,  what  comparison  can  there  be  between  a  soldier  and  a 
civilian  ?  A  soldier  !  Why,  you  can  see  right  off  his  clever- 
ness and  everything.  But  what  does  a  civilian  amount  to? 
Just  a  dummy.  [Silence]  I  wonder  why  it  is  that  so  many 
ladies  sit  down  with  their  feet  under  their  chairs.  There's 
positively  no  difficulty  in  learning  how !  Although  I  was  a 
little  bashful  before  the  teacher,  I  learned  how  to  do  it  per- 
fectly in  twenty  lessons.  Why  not  learn  how  to  dance? 
It's  only  a  superstition  not  to.  Here  mamma  sometimes 
gets  angry  because  the  teacher  is  always  grabbing  at  my 
knees.  All  that  comes  from  lack  of  education.  What  of  it  ? 
He's  a  dancing-master  and  not  somebody  else.  [Reflecting]  I 
picture  to  myself:  suddenly  a  soldier  makes  advances  to  me, 
suddenly  a  solemn  betrothal,  candles  burn  everywhere,  the 
butlers  enter,  wearing  white  gloves;  I,  naturally,  in  a  tulle 
or  perhaps  in  a  gauze  gown;  then  suddenly  they  begin  to 
play  a  waltz — but  how  confused  I  shall  be  before  him !  Ah, 
what  a  shame  !  Then  where  in  the  world  shall  I  hide  ?  What 
will  he  think?  "Here,"  he'll  say,  "an  uneducated  little 
fool !"  But,  no,  how  can  that  be  !  Only,  you  see  I  haven't 
danced  for  a  year  and  a  half !  I'll  try  it  now  at  leisure. 
[Waltzing  badly]  One — two — -three;   one — two — three 

SCENE    II 

LiPOCHKA  and  Agrafena  Kondratyevna 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  [Entering]  Ah,  ha,  shameless 
creature!  My  heart  told  me  so;  before  it's  fairly  daylight, 
before  you've  eaten  God's  bread,  you  start  off  dancing  right 


away 


LiPOCHKA.  Now,  mamma,  I've  drunk  my  tea  and  eaten 


SCENE  II         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         217 

some  curd-cakes.  Look  here,  is  this  all  right?  One,  two, 
three;   one — two 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  [Follonnng  her]  What  differ- 
ence does  it  make  if  you  have  had  something  to  eat  ?  I  sup- 
pose I'll  have  to  keep  watching  what  sinful  pranks  you're 
up  to !     I  tell  you,  don't  whirl  around  ! 

Lipochka.  Pooh !  where's  the  sin  in  that !  Everybody's 
doing  it  nowadays.     One,  two 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Better  knock  your  forehead 
against  the  table,  but  don't  fiddle  around  with  your  feet. 
[She  runs  after  her]  What's  the  matter  with  you  ?  Where 
did  you  get  the  idea  of  not  obeying  '^ 

Lipochka.  Who  told  you  I  <lidn't  obej'.'^  Don't  meddle; 
let  me  finish  the  way  I  want  to !     One,  two,  three 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Shall  I  have  to  run  after  you 
long,  old  woman  as  I  am  .^  Ouf  !  You've  worn  me  out,  you 
barbarian !  Do  you  hear  ?  Stop !  I'll  complain  to  your 
father ! 

Lipochka.  Right  away,  right  away,  mamma !  This  is 
the  last  time  around !  God  created  you  expressly  for  com- 
plaining.    Much  I  care  for  you  !     One — two 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  What !  you  keep  on  dancing, 
and  talk  impudently  into  the  bargain  !  Stop  it  this  minute ! 
It'll  be  so  much  the  worse  for  you ;  I'll  grab  you  by  the  skirt, 
and  tear  off  the  whole  train. 

Lipochka.  Well,  tear  it,  and  much  good  may  it  do  you ! 
You'll  simply  have  to  sew  it  up  again,  and  that's  all  there 
is  to  it !  [She  sits  down]  Phew  !  phew  !  my,  I'm  soaked  through  ! 
as  if  I'd  been  pulling  a  van !  Ouf !  Mamma,  give  me  a 
handkerchief  to  wipe  off  the  perspiration. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Wait,  I'll  wipe  it  off  myself. 
You've  half  killed  yourself!  And  it's  just  as  if  somebody 
were   making   you    do    it.     Since   you    don't    respect   your 


218  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

mother,  you  might  at  least  respect  these  walls.  Your  father, 
my  dear,  has  to  make  a  great  effort  even  to  move  his  legs; 
but  you  skip  about  here  like  a  juni])ing-jack ! 

LiPOCHKA.  Go  away  with  your  advice !  How  can  I  act 
according  to  your  notions  ?  Do  you  want  me  to  get  sick  ? 
That  would  be  all  right  if  I  were  a  doctor's  wife.  Ouf ! 
What  disgusting  ideas  you  have  !  Bah  !  What  a  woman  you 
are,  mamma,  drat  it !  Honestly,  I  sometimes  blush  for  your 
stupidity ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  What  a  darling  child  you 
are  !  Just  consider  how  you're  insulting  your  mother !  Ah, 
you  stupid  chatterbox !  Is  it  right  to  dishonor  your  parents 
with  such  words.''  Was  it  for  this  I  brought  you  into  the 
world,  taught  you,  and  guarded  you  as  carefully  as  if  you 
were  a  butterfly  ? 

LiPOCHKA.  You  didn't  teach  me — strangers  did;  that'll 
do,  if  you  please.  You  yourself,  to  tell  the  truth,  had  no 
bringing  up.  What  of  it  ?  You  bore  a  child — what  was  I 
then  ? — a  child  without  understanding,  I  didn't  understand 
the  ways  of  society.  But  I  grew  up,  I  looked  upon  society 
manners,  and  I  saw  that  I  was  far  more  educated  than  others. 
Why  should  I  show  too  much  indulgence  for  your  foolish- 
ness ?     Why,  indeed  !     Much  reason  for  it,  I  must  say ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Let  up,  let  up,  you  shameless 
girl !  You'll  drive  me  out  of  patience;  I'll  go  straight  to 
your  father,  throw  mj'self  at  his  feet,  and  say:  "Samson, 
dear,  there's  no  living  because  of  our  daughter!" 

LiPOCHKA.  Yes,  there's  no  living  for  you !  I  imagine  so. 
But  do  you  give  me  any  chance  to  live  ?  Why  did  you  send 
away  my  suitor?  Could  there  have  been  a  better  match.'* 
Wasn't  he  a  Coopid.''^  What  did  you  find  in  him  that  was 
soft.'' 

'  An  aUenipt  to  reproduce  Lipochka's  illiterate  pronunciation  of  the  Russian  word. 


SCENE  II         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         219 

Agrafena  KoNDRATYE\TsrA.  He  was  soft  enough;  just  a 
grinning  booby.  He  came  swaggering  around,  swaggered, 
strutted,  strutted.     What  a  rare  bird  ! 

LiPOCHKA.  Yes,  much  you  know  !  Of  course  he's  a  born 
gentleman;  he  behaves  in  a  delicate  way.  They  always  do 
like  that  in  his  circle —  But  how  do  you  dare  to  censure  such 
people,  of  whom  you  haven't  any  idea.'*  He,  I  tell  you,  is 
no  cheap  merchant.  [She  ivhispers  aside]  My  darling,  my 
beauty ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Yes,  a  good  darling !  Do 
tell !  Pity  we  didn't  marry  you  to  some  circus  clown.  Shame 
on  you;  there's  some  kind  of  folly  in  you;  you  whisper  right 
under  your  mother's  nose,  just  to  spite  her. 

LiPOCHKA.  I've  reason  enough,  because  you  don't  desire 
my  happiness.  You  and  pa  are  only  good  for  picking  quar- 
rels and  tyrannizing ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  You  can  think  what  you 
please.  The  Lord  is  your  judge !  But  nobody  feels  the 
anxiety  for  her  child  that  the  mother  who  bore  her  does  ! 
Here  you're  always  posing  and  kicking  up  all  kinds  of  non- 
sense, while  your  father  and  I  worry  day  and  night  about 
how  to  find  you  a  good  man,  and  establish  you  quickly. 

LiPOCHKA.  Yes,  easy  for  you  to  talk;  but  just  let  me  ask, 
what  good  does  that  do  me,  if  you  please.'* 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  As  if  you  thought  I  wasn't 
sorry  for  you  !  But  what  can  I  do  .'*  Have  a  mite  of  patience, 
even  if  you  have  been  waiting  a  few  years.  It's  impossible 
to  find  a  husband  for  you  in  a  second;  it's  only  cats  that 
catch  mice  in  a  jiffy. 

LiPOCHKA.  What  have  I  got  to  do  with  your  cats !  It's 
a  husband  I  want.  What's  the  use !  I'm  ashamed  to  meet 
my  acquaintances;  in  all  Moscow  we  weren't  able  to  choose 
a  husband;    other  girls  kept  having  all  the  luck.     Wouldn't 


220         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

it  make  anybody  sick?  All  my  friends  were  married  long 
ago,  and  here  I  am  like  a  kind  of  orphan  !  We  found  one 
man,  and  turned  him  down.  Now,  look  here:  find  me  a 
husband,  and  find  him  (juick !  .  .  .  .  I  tell  you  in  advance, 
look  me  up  a  husband  right  off,  or  it'll  be  so  much  the  worse 
for  you:  purposely,  just  to  spite  you,  I'll  secretly  scare  up 
an  adorer;  I'll  run  away  with  a  hussar,  and  we'll  get  married 
on  the  quiet. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  What !  What !  You  lewd 
creature !  Who  drummed  such  nastiness  into  your  head  ? 
Merciful  Lord,  I  can't  get  my  breath  !  Ah,  you  dirty  hussy  ! 
Well,  there's  nothing  to  be  done.  It's  evident.  I'll  have  to 
call  your  father. 

LiPOCHKA.  All  you  ever  say  is  "  father,  father ! "  You  have 
a  lot  to  say  when  he's  around,  but  just  try  it  when  you're  by 
yourself ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  So  you  think  I'm  a  fool,  do 
you  ?  W^hat  kind  of  hussars  do  you  know,  you  brazen- 
faced creature  ?  Phoo  !  Diabolical  idea  !  Perhaps  you  think 
I'm  not  able  to  make  you  mind  ?  Tell  me,  you  shameless- 
eyed  girl,  where  did  you  get  that  spiteful  look  ?  What,  you 
want  to  be  sharper  than  your  mother !  It  won't  take  me 
long,  I  tell  you,  to  send  you  into  the  kitchen  to  boil  the 
kettles.  Shame,  shame  on  you !  Ah !  Ah !  My  holy 
saints !  I'll  make  you  a  hempen  wedding-dress,  and  pull  it 
on  over  your  head  directly.  I'll  make  you  live  with  the 
pigs,  instead  of  your  parents ! 

LiPOCHKA.  How's  that?  Will  I  allow  anybody  to  boss 
me  about  ?     The  idea  ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Shut  up,  shut  up,  you  bab- 
bling Bessie !  Give  in  to  your  mother !  What  obstinate 
daring !  Just  peep  another  word  and  I'll  stop  your  mouth 
with  a  potato.  A  beautiful  consolation  the  Lord  has  sent 
me  in  you !     Impudent  slut !     You're  a  miserable  tomboy 


SCENE  II         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         221 

and  you  haven't  a  womanly  thought  in  your  head  !  You're 
ready,  I  suppose,  to  jump  on  horseback  and  go  oflp  Hke  a 
soldier ! 

LiPOCHKA.  I  suppose  you'll  ring  in  the  police,  presently ! 
You'd  do  better  to  keep  still,  since  you  weren't  properly 
brought  up.  I'm  absolutely  vile;  but  what  are  you,  after 
all  ?  Do  you  want  to  send  me  to  the  other  world  before  my 
time?  Do  you  want  to  kill  me  with  your  caprices?  [She 
weeps]  Already  I'm  about  coughing  my  lungs  out!     [Weeps. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  [Stands  and  looks  at  her]  Well, 
stop,  stop ! 

LiPOCHKA  weeps  louder  and  then  sobs. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  I  tell  you,  that'll  do !  I'm 
talking  to  you;  stop  it !  Well,  it's  my  fault;  only  do  stop — 
it's  my  fault ! 

LiPOCHKA  weeps. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Lipochka  !  Lipa  !  Come, 
come,  do  stop!  [Tearfully]  Now,  don't  get  angry  at  me — 
[She  weeps]  A  silly  old  woman — ignorant —  [They  weep  to- 
gether] Please  forgive  me — I'll  buy  you  some  earrings. 

LiPOCHKA.  [Weeping]  I  don't  want  your  old  earrings;  I 
have  a  drawer  full  already.  You  buy  me  some  bracelets  with 
emeralds. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  I  will,  I  will,  only  please  stop 
crying ! 

LiPOCHKA.  [Through  her  tears]  I  won't  stop  crying  till  I 
get  married.  [She  weeps. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  You'll  get  married,  my  dar- 
ling; you  will!  Now,  give  me  a  kiss!  [They  kiss]  There, 
Christ  be  with  you !  Now  let  me  wipe  away  the  tears  for 
you.  [She  wipes  the  tears]  Ustinya  Naumovna  wanted  to 
come  to-day;   we're  going  to  talk  a  bit. 

LiPOCHKA.  [In  a  voice  still  rather  trembly]  Oh,  dear,  I  wish 
she'd  hurry  up ! 


222  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

SCENE    III 

The  same  and  Fominishna 

FoMiNiSHNA.  Just  guess,  my  dear  Agrafena  Kondratyevna, 
who's  come  to  call  on  us ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  I  can't  say.  Do  you  think 
I'm  a  witch  at  guessing,  Fominishna? 

LiPOCHKA.  Why  don't  you  ask  me?  Am  I  stupider  than 
you  or  mamma? 

Fominishna.  The  fact  is,  I  don't  know  how  to  tell  you. 
You're  pretty  strong  on  talk;  but  when  it  comes  to  action 
you  aren't  there !  I  asked  you,  and  asked  you,  to  give  me 
just  a  handkercliief — ^nothing  expensive :  two  heaps  of  stuff  are 
lying  around  on  your  closet  floor  now  without  any  care; 
but  it  didn't  do  any  good;  it's  always  give  it  to  strangers, 
give  it  to  strangers ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  There,  now,  Fominishna,  I'll 
never  make  this  out  till  doomsday. 

LiPOCHKA.  Let  her  go;  she  had  a  drink  of  beer  after 
breakfast,  and  so  she's  getting  fuzzy  in  her  head. 

Fominishna.  That's  all  right;  what  are  you  laugliing  at? 
How's  it  coming  out,  Agrafena  Kondratyevna?  Sometimes 
the  beginning  is  worse  than  the  end. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  One  can  never  find  out  any- 
thing from  you !  As  soon  as  you  begin  to  talk,  we  have  to 
stop  up  our  ears!     Now,  who  was  it  who  came  here? 

LiPOCHKA.  A  man  or  a  woman  ? 

Fominishna.  You  can  never  see  anything  but  men ! 
Where  in  the  world  did  one  ever  see  a  man  wearing  a  widow's 
bonnet  ?  Tliis  is  a  widow's  affair — so  what  should  her  name 
be? 


SCENE  IV        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         223 

LiPOCHKA.  Naturally,  a  woman  without  a  husband,  a 
widow. 

FoMiNiSHNA.  So  I  was  right?  And  it  comes  out  that  it 
is  a  woman ! 

LiPOCHKA.  What  a  senseless  creature !  Well,  who  is  the 
woman  ? 

FoMiNiSHNA.  There,  there  now,  you're  clever,  but  no 
guesser;  it  couldn't  be  anybody  else  but  Ustinya  Naumovna. 

LiPOCHKA.  Ah,  mamma,  how  lucky  ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Wliere  has  she  been  all  this 
time.'*     Bring  her  in  quickly,  Fominishna. 

FoMiNiSHNA.  She'll  appear  herself  in  a  second.  She 
stopped  in  the  yard,  quarrelling  with  the  porter;  he  didn't 
open  the  door  quickly  enough. 

SCENE    IV 

The  same  and  Ustinya  Naumovna 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  [Entering]  Ouf,  fa,  fa!  Why  do 
you  have  such  a  steep  staircase,  my  jewels  ?  You  climb,  and 
climb,  and  much  as  ever  you  get  there ! 

LiPOCHKA.  Oh,  here  she  is !  How  are  you,  Ustinya  Nau- 
movna ? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Don't  get  in  a  hurry  !  There's  peo- 
ple older  than  you.  I  want  to  chatter  with  your  mamma  a 
bit  first.  [Exchanges  kisses  ivith  Agrafena  Kondratyevna] 
How  are  you,  Agrafena  Kondratyevna?  How  did  you  feel 
when  you  got  up  ?  How  did  you  pass  the  night  ?  All  alive, 
my  precious  ? 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Thank  the  Lord !  I'm  alive, 
able  to  chew,  I've  been  joking  with  my  daughter  all  the 
morning. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  All  about  dresses,  I  suppose.  [Ex- 


224  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

changing  hisses  with  Lipochka]  Well,  your  turn  has  come. 
What's  this  !  It  seems  as  if  you  had  grown  stouter,  my  jewel ! 
Lord  bless  you  !  What  could  be  better  than  to  blossom  out 
in  beauty ! 

FoMiNiSHNA.  Shame  on  you,  temptress !  You'll  give  us 
bad  luck  yet ! 

Lipochka.  Oh,  what  nonsense !  It  just  looks  that  way 
to  you,  Ustinya  Naumovna.  I  keep  getting  punier;  first 
it's  stomachache,  then  palpitation  of  the  heart — just  like  the 
beating  of  a  pendulum.  Now  I  have  a  sinking  feeling,  or 
feel  kind  of  seasick,  and  tilings  swim  before  my  eyes. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  [To  Fominishna]  Come  on,  you 
dear  soid,  let's  have  a  kiss  now.  To  be  sure,  we've  already 
exchanged  greetings  in  the  yard,  my  jewel,  so  we  don't  need 
to  rub  lips  again. 

Fominishna.  Just  as  you  wish.  Of  course  I'm  no  lady  of 
a  household.  I  don't  amount  to  much;  all  the  same  I  have 
a  soul  in  me,  and  not  just  vapor ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  [Sitting  doivn]  Sit  down,  sit 
down,  Ustinya  Naumovna !  Why  do  you  stand  up  as  stiff 
as  a  bean-pole  ?  Fominishna,  go  tell  them  to  heat  up  the 
samovar. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  I've  had  my  tea,  I've  had  it,  my 
jewel;  may  I  perish  on  the  spot  if  I  haven't;  and  I've  just 
dropped  in  for  a  moment. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  What  are  you  loafing  about 
for,  Fominishna.''     Run  off  a  little  more  nimbly,  granny. 

Lipochka.  Let  me,  mamma,  I'll  go  quicker;  look  how 
clumsy  she  is ! 

Fominishna.  Don't  you  meddle  where  you  aren't  asked ! 
For  my  part,  my  dear  Agrafena  Kondratyevna,  this  is  what 
I  think:  wouldn't  it  be  nicer  to  serve  cordial  and  some  her- 
ring .'' 


SCENE  VI        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         225 

Agr.o^ena  Kondratyevna.  Cordial's  all  right,  and  the 
samovar's  all  right.  Or  are  you  stingy  with  other  people's 
stuff?     Well,  when  it's  ready,  have  it  brought  here. 

FoMiNiSHNA.  Certainly  !     All  right !  [She  goes  out. 


SCENE    V 

The  same,  without  Fominishna 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Well,  haven't  you  any  news, 
Ustinya  Naumovna.'  This  girl  of  mine  is  simply  grieved  to 
death. 

LiPOCHKA.  And  really,  Ustinya  Naumovna,  you  keep 
coming,  and  coming,  and  no  good  comes  of  it. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  But  one  can't  fix  things  up  quickly 
with  you,  my  jewels.  Your  daddy  has  his  eye  peeled  for  a 
rich  fellow;  he  tells  me  he'll  be  satisfied  with  any  bell-boy 
provided  he  has  money  and  asks  a  small  enough  settlement. 
And  your  mamma  also,  Agrafena  Kondratyevna,  is  always 
wanting  her  own  taste  suited;  you  must  be  sure  to  give  her 
a  merchant,  with  a  decoration,  who  keeps  horses,  and  who 
crosses  himself  in  the  old  way.'  You  also  have  your  own 
notions.     How's  a  person  going  to  please  you  all? 


SCENE    VI 

The  same  and  Fominishna,  who  enters  and  places  vodka  and 
relishes  on  the  table. 

LiPOCHKA.  I  won't  marry  a  merchant,  not  for  anything. 
I  won't !    As  if  I  was  brought  up  for  that,  and  learned  French, 

'  Evidently,  Bolshov  and  his  family,  like  many  other  wealthy  Moscow  merchants, 
belonged  to  the  sect  of  the  Old  Believers,  one  of  whose  dearest  tenets  is  that  the  sign 
of  the  cross  should  be  made  with  two  fingers  instead  of  with  three. 


226  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

and  to  play  tlie  piano,  and  to  dance!  No,  no;  get  him 
wherever  you  want  to,  but  get  me  an  aristocrat. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Here,  you  talk  with  her. 

FoMiNisHNA.  What  put  aristocrats  into  your  head? 
"What's  the  special  relish  in  them  ?  They  don't  even  grow 
beards  like  Christians;  they  don't  go  to  the  public  baths, 
and  don't  make  pasties  on  holidays.  But,  you  see,  even  if 
you're  married,  you'll  get  sick  of  nothing  but  sauce  and 
gravy. 

LiPOCHKA.  Fominishna,  you  were  born  a  peasant,  and 
you'll  turn  up  your  toes  a  peasant.  What's  your  merchant 
to  me.'*  What  use  would  he  be?  Has  he  any  ambition  to 
rise  in  the  world  ?     What  do  I  want  of  his  mop  ? 

Fominishna.  Not  a  mop,  but  the  hair  that  God  gave  him, 
miss,  that's  it. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  See  what  a  rough  old  codger 
your  dad  is;  he  doesn't  trim  his  beard;  yet,  somehow,  you 
manage  to  kiss  him. 

LiPOCHKA.  Dad  is  one  tiling,  but  my  husband  is  another. 
But  why  do  you  insist,  mamma  ?  I  have  already  said  that 
I  won't  marry  a  merchant,  and  I  won't !  I'd  rather  die 
first;  I'll  cry  to  the  end  of  my  life;  if  tears  give  out,  I'll 
swallow  pepper. 

Fominishna.  Are  you  getting  ready  to  bawl?  Don't 
you  think  of  it ! — What  fun  do  you  get  out  of  teasing  her, 
Agrafena  Kondratyevna  ? 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Who's  teasing  her?  She's 
mighty  touchy. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Well,  well,  if  you've  got  your  mind 
set  on  a  nobleman,  we'll  find  you  one.  What  sort  do  you 
want;  rather  stout,  or  rather  lean? 

LiPOCHKA.  Doesn't  matter,  it's  all  right  if  he's  rather 
stout,  so  long  as  he's  no  shorty.     Of  course  he'd  better  be 


SCENE  VII       IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         227 

tall  than  an  insignificant  little  runt !  And  most  of  all, 
Ustinya  Naumovna,  he  mustn't  be  snub-nosed,  and  he  ab- 
solutely must  be  dark-complexioned.  It's  understood,  of 
course,  that  he  must  be  dressed  like  the  men  in  the  magazines. 
[She  glances  at  the  mirror]  Oh,  Lord,  my  hair  looks  like  a 
feather-duster  to-day ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Now,  my  jewel,  I  have  a  husband 
for  you  of  the  very  sort  you  describe:  aristocratic,  tall,  and 
brown-complected. 

LiPocHKA.  Oh,  Ustinya  Naumovna !  Not  brown-com- 
plected, but  dark-complexioned ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Yes,  much  I  need,  in  my  old  age,  to 
split  my  tongue  talking  your  lingo.  What  I  said,  goes.  He 
has  peasants,  and  wears  a  norder  about  his  neck.  Now  you 
go  get  dressed,  and  your  mamma  and  I  will  talk  this  thing 
over. 

LiPOCHKA.  Oh,  my  dear,  sweet  Ustinya  Naumovna,  come 
up  to  my  room  a  bit  later;  I  must  talk  with  you.  Let's  go, 
Fominishna. 

Fominishna,  Ha,  what  a  fidgety  cliild  you  are ! 

[They  go  out. 

SCENE    VII 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna  and  Ustinya  Naumovna 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Won't  you  have  a  sip  of  cor- 
dial before  your  tea,  Ustinya  Naumovna.'^ 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Don't  care  if  I  do,  my  jewel. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  [Pouring]  With  my  compli- 
ments. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  You  ought  to  drink  first,  my  pearl. 

[Drinks. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  I'll  look  out  for  myself ! 


228  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Ya  !  Phoo !  Wliere  d'you  get  this 
decoction  ? 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  At  the  wine-shop.         [Drinks. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Buy  it  in  bulk,  I  suppose.'' 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  By  the  gallon.  What  should 
you  want  to  buy  in  small  quantities  for .''  Our  expenses,  you 
see,  are  heavy. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  What's  the  use  of  talking,  my  dear, 
what's  the  use !  Now,  I've  been  bustling  about,  bustling 
about  for  you,  Agrafena  Kondratyevna;  trudging,  trudging 
over  the  pavement,  and  at  last  I've  grubbed  up  a  suitable 
man:   you'll  gasp  for  joy,  my  jewels,  for  a  fact. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  At  last  you're  talking  sense! 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  A  man  of  birth  and  of  standing;  such 
a  grandee  as  you  never  even  dreamed  of. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  I  see  I'll  have  to  ask  Samson 
Silych  for  a  couple  of  fivers  for  you. 

UsTiNTA  Naumovna.  That's  all  right,  my  jewel,  I  don't 
mind  !  And  he  has  peasants,  wears  a  norder  on  his  neck; 
and  as  for  intellect,  why,  he's  simply  a  bonanza. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Then,  Ustinya  Naumovna, 
you  ought  to  have  informed  him  that  our  daughter  hasn't 
got  piles  of  money. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  But  he  doesn't  know  where  to  put 
his  own. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  That  would  be  good,  and  jolly 
good;  only,  look  here,  Ustinya  Naumovna,  and  just  consider 
it  yourself,  my  friend:  what  am  I  going  to  do  with  a  noble- 
man for  a  son-in-law  ?  I  shan't  dare  say  a  word  to  him;  I'll 
be  all  at  sea. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  It's  a  Httle  scary  at  first,  my  jewel, 
but  afterwards  you'll  get  used  to  things,  you'll  manage  some- 


SCENE  VIII     IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         229 

how  or  other.     But,  here,  we  must  talk  a  bit  with  Samson 
Silych;   he  may  even  know  him,  this  man  of  ours. 

SCENE     VIII 

The  same  and  Rispolozhensky 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  [Entering]  I've  come  to  you,  my  dear 
Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  I  was  going  to  have  a  talk  with 
Samson  Silych,  but  he  was  busy,  I  saw;  so  I  thought:  now, 
I'll  go  to  Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  By  the  way,  is  that 
vodka,  near  you .''  I'll  just  take  a  thimbleful,  Agrafena 
Kondratyevna.  [Drinks. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  With  my  compliments,  my 
dear  sir.  Please  sit  down,  won't  you  ?  How  are  you  getting 
along  ? 

Rispolozhensky.  What  a  life  I  live  !  Well,  I'm  just  loaf- 
ing, Agrafena  Kondratyevna;  you  know  yourself,  my  fam- 
ily's large,  business  is  dull.  But  I  don't  grumble;  it's  a  sin 
to  grumble,  Agrafena  Kondratyevna. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  That's  the  last  thing  in  the 
world  to  do,  my  dear  sir. 

Rispolozhensky.  Whoever  grumbles,  I  think,  offends 
against  God,  Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  This  is  the  way  it 
happened 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  What  are  your  front  names, 
my  dear  sir?     I  keep  forgetting. 

Rispolozhensky.  Sysoy  Psoich,  my  dear  Agrafena  Kon- 
dratyevna. 

Ustinya  Naximovna.  What  does  Psoich  mean,  my  jewel  ? 
What  lingo  is  that  ?  ' 

Rispolozhensky.  I  can't  tell  you  positively:  they  called 
my  father  Psoy — well,  naturally,  that  makes  me  Psoich. 

'The  name  lends  itself  to  the  interpretation,  "son  of  a  dog  {pes)." 


230  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  But,  Psoich,  like  that,  Psoich ! 
However,  that's  nothing;    there  are  worse,  my  jewel. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Well,  Sysoy  Psoich,  what  was 
it  you  w  ere  going  to  tell  us  ? 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  Well,  it  was  like  this,  my  dear  Agra- 
fena Kondratyevna:  it  isn't  as  if  it  were  a  proverb,  in  a  kind 
of  fable,  but  a  real  occurrence.  I'll  just  take  a  thimbleful, 
Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  [Drinks. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Help  yourself,  my  dear  sir, 
help  yourself. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  [Sits  doum]  There  was  an  old  man,  a 
venerable  old  man —  Here,  I've  forgotten  where  it  was,  my 
dear  madam — only  it  was  In  some  desert  spot.  He  had 
twelve  daughters,  my  dear  madam;  each  younger  than  the 
other !  He  didn't  have  the  strength  to  work  himself;  his 
wife,  too,  was  very  old,  the  children  were  still  small;  and  one 
has  to  eat  and  drink.  What  they  had  was  used  up  by  the 
time  they  were  old,  and  there  was  no  one  to  give  them  food 
and  drink.  Where  could  they  find  refuge  with  their  little 
children  ?  Then  he  set  to  thinking  this  way,  then  that  way. 
—  No,  my  dear  lady,  that's  where  thinking  won't  do  any 
good.  "I'll  go,"  he  said,  "to  the  crossroads;  perhaps  I  can 
get  something  from  charitable  people."  He  sat  all  day. 
"God'U  help  you,"  they  told  him.  Sits  there  another  day. 
"God'U  help  you!"  Well,  my  dear  lady,  he  began  to 
murmur. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Holy  saints  ! 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  " Good  Lord!"  he  said,  "I'm  no  ex- 
tortioner, I'm  no  usurer — it  would  be  better,"  he  said,  "to 
lay  hands  on  myself." 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Merciful  heavens  ! 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  And  lo !  my  dear  madam,  there  came  a 
dream  to  him  in  the  night 


SCENE  IX       IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         231 

SCENE    IX 

The  same  and  Bolshov 

BoLSHOV.  Ha,  you  here,  sir?  What's  this  you're  preach- 
ing here? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  [Botvs]  I  hope  you're  well,  Samson 
Silyeh. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Why,  my  jewel !  You  seem  to  be 
growing  thin.     Or  have  you  been  crippled  somehow? 

Bolshov.  [Sittiiig  down]  Must  be  I've  caught  cold,  or 
perhaps  my  blood's  in  a  bad  way. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Well,  Sysoy  Psoich,  and  what 
happened  to  him  next? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Some  other  time,  Agrafena  Kondrat- 
yevna, some  other  time  I'll  finish  telling;  I'll  run  in  some 
day  about  dusk  and  tell  you  about  it  fully. 

Bolshov.  What's  the  matter  with  you;  trying  to  be  sanc- 
timonious ?     Ha,  ha,  ha  !     It's  time  you  came  to  ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  There,  now,  you're  beginning  ! 
You  won't  let  us  have  a  heart-to-heart  talk  together. 

Bolshov.  Heart-to-heart  talk!  Ha,  ha,  ha!  But  you 
just  ask  him  how  his  case  was  lost  from  court;  there's  the 
story  he'll  tell  you  better. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  On  the  contrary,  it  was  not  lost ! 
That's  not  true,  Samson  Silyeh ! 

Bolshov.  Then  what  did  they  turn  you  out  for? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  This  is  why,  my  dear  Agrafena  Kondrat- 
yevna. I  took  one  case  home  with  me  from  the  court;  on 
the  way  my  friend  and  I  just  stepped  asidt; — mortal  man  is 
weak;  well,  you  understand — -if  you'll  i)ermit  me  to  say  it, 
into  the  wine-shop,  so  to  speak.     I  left  it  there,  and  when  I 


232  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

was  rather  tipsy,  I  suppose,  I  forgot  it.  What  of  that?  It 
might  happen  to  anybody.  Afterwards,  my  dear  lady,  they 
missed  that  case  in  court;  we  looked  and  looked,  and  I  went 
home  twice  with  the  bailiff — still  we  couldn't  find  it.  They 
wanted  to  bring  me  to  trial,  but  suddenly  I  remembered: 
it  must  be,  now,  I  forgot  that  tiling  and  left  it  in  the  wine- 
shop.    I  went  there  with  the  bailiff,  and  there  it  was. 

Agrafena  Koxdratyevtsta.  I  declare  !  That  may  happen 
to  a  sober  man  as  well  as  to  one  who  drinks.     What  a  pity ! 

BoLSHOV.  How  is  it  they  didn't  send  you  off  to  Kamchatka  ? 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  To  Kamchatka !  But  why,  permit  me 
to  ask  you,  why  should  they  send  me  off  to  Kamchatka.'* 

BoLSHOV.  Why.f*  Because  you're  drunk  and  disorderly. 
Do  they  have  to  show  you  any  indulgence?  Why,  you'll 
just  kill  yourself  drinking. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  On  the  contrary,  they  spared  me.  You 
see,  my  dear  Agrafena  Kondratyevna,  they  wanted  to  try 
me  for  that  very  thing — I  went  immediately  to  our  general, 
and  flopped  at  his  feet !  "Your  Excellency  !"  I  said.  "Don't 
ruin  me  !  I've  a  wife,"  I  said,  "and  little  children  !"  "Well," 
he  said,  "deuce  take  you;  they  won't  strike  a  man  when 
he's  down:  tender  your  resignation,  so  I  shan't  see  you  here." 
So  he  spared  me.  What  now  !  God  bless  him  !  He  doesn't 
forget  me  even  now;  sometimes  I  run  in  to  see  him  on  a 
holiday:  "Well,"  says  he,  "how  are  you,  Sysoy  Psoich?" 
"I  came,  your  Excellency,  to  wish  you  a  happy  holiday." 
So,  I  went  to  the  Troitsa  monastery  not  long  ago,  and  brought 
him  a  consecrated  wafer.  I'll  just  take  a  thimbleful,  Agra- 
fena Kondratyevna.  [Drinks. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  With  my  compliments,  my 
dear  sir.  Ustinya  Naumovna,  let's  you  and  me  go  out; 
the  samovar  is  ready,  I  suppose;  I'll  show  you  that  we  have 
something  new  for  the  wedding  outfit. 


SCENE  X         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  233 

UsTiNYA  Naxjmovna.  I  suppose,  my  jewel,  you  have  heaps 
of  stuff  ready. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Why  certainly.  The  new 
materials  have  come,  and  it  seenis  as  if  we  didn't  have  to 
pay  money  for  them. 

Ustinya  Naxjmovna.  What's  the  use  of  talking,  my  pearl ! 
You  have  your  own  shop,  and  it's  as  if  they  grew  in  your 
garden.  [They  go  out. 

SCENE    X 

BoLSHOV  and  Rispolozhensky 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  Sysoy  Psoich,  I  suppose  you've  wasted 
a  good  deal  of  ink  in  your  time  on  this  pettifoggery.^ 

Rispolozhensky.  He,  he !  Samson  Silj-ch,  cheap  goods  ! 
But  I  came  to  inquire  how  your  business  is  getting  on. 

BoLSHOV.  You  did !  Much  you  need  to  know !  Bah, 
you  low-down  people !  You  bloodsuckers !  Just  let  you 
scent  out  something  or  other,  and  immediately  you  sneak 
round  with  your  diabolical  suggestions. 

Rispolozhensky.  W^hat  kind  of  a  suggestion  could  come 
from  me,  Samson  Silych.^  What  kind  of  a  teacher  should  I 
be,  when  you  yourself,  perhaps,  are  ten  times  wiser  than  I 
am  ?  I  shall  do  what  I'm  asked  to  do.  How  can  I  help  it  ? 
I'd  be  a  hog  if  I  didn't;  because  I,  it  may  be  said,  am  loaded 
with  favors  by  you,  and  so  are  my  kiddies.  I'm  too  much  of 
a  fool  to  advise  you;  you  know  your  own  business  yourself 
better  than  anybody  else. 

BoLSHOv.  Know  my  own  business !  That's  the  trouble; 
men  like  me,  merchants,  blockheads,  understand  nothing; 
and  this  just  serves  the  turn  of  such  leeches  as  you.  And 
now  you'll  besiege  me  on  every  side  and  haunt  me  to  death. 


234  IT'S    A  FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

RisPOLozHENSKY.  How  Can  I  help  haunting  you  ?  If  I 
didn't  love  you  I  wouldn't  haunt  you.  Haven't  I  any  feel- 
ings?    Am  I  really  a  mere  dumb  brute? 

BoLSHOV.  I  know  that  you  love  me — you  all  love  us; 
only  one  can't  get  anything  decent  out  of  you.  Here  I'm 
worrying,  worrying  with  this  business  so  that  I'm  worn  out, 
if  you  believe  me,  with  this  one  anxiety.  If  I  could  only  get 
it  over  with,  and  out  of  my  head. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  Well,  Samson  Silych,  you  aren't  the 
first,  nor  the  last;  aren't  others  doing  it? 

BoLSHOV.  How  can  they  help  it,  brother?  Others  are 
doing  it.  But  how  do  they  do  it;  without  shame,  without 
conscience !  They  ride  in  carriages  with  easy  springs ;  they 
live  in  three-storied  houses.  One  of  them  will  build  a  bel- 
vedere with  pillars,  in  which  he's  ashamed  to  show  his  ugly 
phiz;  and  that's  the  end  of  him,  and  you  can't  get  anything 
out  of  him.  These  carriages  will  roll  away.  Lord  knows 
where;  all  his  houses  are  mortgaged,  and  all  the  creditors 
will  get  out  of  it'll  be  three  pairs  of  old  boots.  That's  the 
whole  story.  And  who  is  it  that  he'll  fool  ?  Just  some  poor 
beggars  whom  he'll  send  out  into  the  world  in  nothing  but 
their  shirts.  But  my  creditors  are  all  rich  men;  what  differ- 
ence will  it  make  to  them? 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  Naturally.  Wliy,  Samson  Silych,  all 
that  is  in  our  hands. 

BoLSHov.  I  know  that  it's  in  our  hands;  but  are  you  equal 
to  handling  this  affair  ?  You  see,  you  lawyers  are  a  rum  lot. 
Oh,  I  know  you !  You're  nimble  enough  in  words,  and  then 
you  go  and  mess  tilings  up. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  But  come  now,  Samson  Silych,  if  you 
please:  do  you  think  tliis  is  the  first  time  for  me  !  As  though 
I  didn't  know  that  already !  He,  he,  he !  Yes,  I've  done 
such  things  before;    and  they've  turned  out  fine.     They'd 


SCENE X         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         235 

have  sent  anybody  else  long  ago  for  such  jobs  to  the  other 
side  of  nowhere. 

BoLSHOv.  Oho !  What  kind  of  a  scheme  will  you  get 
up? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Why,  we'll  see — according  to  circum- 
stances. I'll  just  take  a  thimbleful,  Samson  Silych.  [Drinks] 
Now,  the  first  thing,  Samson  Siiych,  we  must  mortgage  the 
house  and  shops;    or  sell  them.     That's  the  first  thing. 

BoLSHOv.  Yes,  that  positively  must  be  done  right  away. 
But  on  whom  shall  we  shove  the  stuff?  Shall  it  be  my 
wife  ? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Illegal,  Samson  Silych  !  That's  illegal ! 
It  is  stated  in  the  laws  that  such  sales  are  not  valid.  It's 
an  easy  thing  to  do,  but  you'll  have  to  see  that  there're  no 
hitches  afterward.  If  it's  to  be  done,  it  must  be  done  thor- 
oughly, Samson  Silych. 

BoLSHOV.  That's  it:   there  must  be  no  loose  ends. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  If  you  make  it  over  to  an  outsider, 
there's  nothing  they  can  cavil  at.  Let  'em  try  to  make  a 
row  later,  and  try  to  dispute  good  legal  papers. 

BoLSHOV.  But  here's  the  trouble:  when  you  make  over 
your  house  to  an  outsider,  maybe  it'll  stick  to  him,  like  a 
flea  to  a  soldier. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Well,  Samson  Silych,  you  must  look  for 
a  man  who  knows  what  conscience  is. 

BoLSHOV.  But  where  are  you  going  to  find  him  nowa- 
days? Everybody's  watching  his  chance  these  days  to 
grab  you  by  the  collar;   and  here  you  want  conscience! 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Here's  my  idea,  Samson  Silych,  whether 
you  want  to  listen  to  me  or  not:  what  sort  of  a  fellow  is  your 
clerk  ? 

BoLSHOV.  Which  one  ?     Do  you  mean  Lazar  ? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Yes;  Lazar  Elizarych. 


236  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

BoLSHOV.  All  right,  Lazar;  make  it  over  to  him;  he's  a 
young  man  with  understanding,  and  he  has  some  capital. 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  What  do  you  want,  Samson  Silych,  a 
mortgage-deed  or  a  purchase-deed  ? 

BoLSHOV.  Whichever  you  can  get  at  the  lowest  interest 
rate'll  suit  me.  But  do  the  thing  up  brown  and  I'll  give 
you  such  a  fee,  Sysoy  Psoich,  as'll  fairly  make  your  hair  curl. 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  Set  your  mind  at  rest,  Samson  Silych, 
I  know  my  own  business.  But  have  you  talked  to  Lazar 
Elizarych  about  this  thing  or  not.'*  Samson  Silych,  I'll  just 
take  a  thimbleful.  [Drinks. 

BoLSHov.  Not  yet.  We'll  talk  it  over  to-day.  He's  a 
capable  lad:  only  wink  at  him,  and  he  understands.  And 
he'll  do  the  business  up  so  tight  that  you  can't  get  in  a  finger. 
Well!  we'll  mortgage  the  house;  and  then  what? 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  Then  we'll  write  out  a  statement  that 
such  and  such  notes  are  due,  and  that  we'll  pay  twenty-five 
kopeks  on  the  ruble:  well,  then  go  see  the  creditors.  If  any- 
body is  especially  stubborn,  you  can  add  a  bit,  and  if  a  man 
gets  real  angry,  pay  him  the  whole  bill.  You'll  pay  him  on 
the  condition  that  he  writes  that  he  accepted  twenty-five 
kopeks — ^just  for  appearances,  to  show  the  others.  "That's 
the  way  he  did,"  you  see;  and  the  others,  seeing  the  docu- 
ment, will  agree. 

BoLSHOV.  That's  right,  there's  no  harm  in  bargaining: 
if  they  don't  take  it  at  twenty-five  kopeks,  they'll  take  it 
at  half  a  ruble;  but  if  they  won't  take  it  at  half  a  ruble, 
they'll  grab  for  it  with  both  hands  at  seventy  kopeks.  We'll 
profit,  anyhow.  There,  you  can  say  what  you  please,  but  I 
have  a  marriageable  daughter;  I  want  to  pass  her  on,  and 
get  rid  of  her.  And  then,  my  boy,  it'll  be  time  for  me  to 
take  a  rest;  I'll  have  an  easy  time  lying  on  my  back;  and 
to  the  devil  with  all  this  trading !     But  here  comes  Lazar. 


SCENE  XI        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  237 

SCENE    XI 

The  same  and  Podkhalyuzin,  ivho  enters 

BoLSHOV.  What  do  you  say,  Lazar?  Just  come  from 
town  ?     How  are  your  affairs  ? 

Podkhalyuzin.  Oh,  they're  getting  on  so-so;   thank  God, 

sir  !     Good  morning,  Sysoy  Psoich  !  [Bows. 

RisPOLOzHENSKY.  How  do  you  do,  my  dear  Lazar  Elizaryeh  ! 

[Boios. 

BoLSHOV.  If  they're  getting  on,  let  'em  get.  [After  a  short 
silence]  But,  look  here,  Lazar,  when  you  make  up  the  balance 
for  me  at  your  leisure,  you  might  deduct  the  retail  items  sold 
to  the  gentry,  and  the  rest  of  that  sort  of  thing.  You  see, 
we're  trading  and  trading,  my  boy,  but  there's  not  a  kopek 
of  profit  in  it.  Maybe  the  clerks  are  going  wrong  and  are 
carrying  off  stuff  to  their  folks  and  mistresses.  You  ought  to 
give  'em  a  word  of  advice.  What's  the  use  of  fooling  around 
without  making  any  profits  .'*  Don't  they  know  the  tricks 
of  the  trade.''     It's  high  time,  it  seems  to  me. 

Podkhalyuzin.  How  in  the  world  can  they  help  knowing, 
Samson  Silych.'*  It  seems  as  if  I  were  always  in  town  and 
always  talking  to  them,  sir. 

BoLSHOv.  But  what  do  you  say.? 
.  Podkhalyuzin.  Why,  the  usual  thing,  sir.  I  try  to  have 
everything  in  order  and  as  it  should  be.  "Now,  my  boys," 
I  say,  "look  sharp,  now.  Maybe  there's  a  chance  for  a  sale; 
some  idiot  of  a  purchaser  may  turn  uj),  or  a  colored  j;)attern 
may  catch  some  young  lady's  eye,  and  click!"  I  say,  "you 
add  a  ruble  or  two  to  the  price  per  yard." 

Bolshov.  I  suppose  you  know,  brother,  how  the  Germans 
in   our   shops   swindle   the   gentlemen.     Even   if  we're   not 


238  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

Germans,  but  orthodox  Christians,  we,  too,  like  to  eat  stuffed 
pasties.     Ain't  that  so?     Ha? 
RisPOLOZHENSKY  laughs. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Why  certainly,  sir.  "And  you  must 
measure,"  I  say,  "more  naturally:  pull  and  stretch  ju-u-u-st 
enough,  God  save  us,  not  to  tear  the  cloth:  you  see,"  I  say, 
"we  don't  have  to  wear  it  afterwards.  Well,  and  if  they 
look  the  other  way,  nobody's  to  blame  if  you  should  happen 
to  measure  one  yard  of  cloth  twice." 

BoLSHOV.  It's  all  one.  I  suppose  the  tailor'd  steal  it. 
Ha?     He'd  steal  it,  I  suppose? 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  He'd  steal  it,  Samson  Silych,  certainly 
that  rascal  would  steal  it;  I  know  these  tailors. 

BoLSHov.  That's  it;  the  whole  lot  of  them  are  rascals, 
and  we  get  the  thanks. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  Quite  right,  Samson  Silych,  you're  cer- 
tainly speaking  the  truth. 

BoLSHOV.  Ah,  Lazar,  profits  are  rotten  these  days:  it's 
not  as  it  used  to  be.  [After  a  Tnoment  of  silence]  Well,  did  you 
bring  the  paper? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  [Taking  it  from  his  pocket  and  handing  it 
over]  Be  so  good  as  to  read  it,  sir. 

BoLSHOV.  Just  give  it  here;   we'll  take  a  look. 

[He  puts  on  his  spectacles  and  examines  the  paper. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  Samson  Silych,  I'll  just  take  a  thimble- 
ful. 

He  drinks,  then  puts  on  his  spectacles,  sits  down  beside 
BoLSHOV,  a7id  looks  at  the  newspapers. 

BoLSHOV.  [Reads  aloud]  "Crown  announcements,  and  from 
various  societies.  One,  two,  three,  four,  five,  and  six,  from 
the  Foundlings'  Hospital."  That's  not  in  our  line:  it's  not 
for  us  to  buy  peasants.  "Seven  and  eight  from  Moscow 
University,  from  the  Government  Regencies,  from  the  Office 


SCENE  XI        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         239 

of  the  Board  of  Charities."  Well,  we'll  pass  that  up,  too. 
"From  the  City  Council  of  Six."  Now,  sir,  maybe  there's 
something  here!  [He  reads]  "The  Moscow  City  Council  of 
Six  hereby  announces:  Would  not  some  one  care  to  take  in 
his  charge  the  collection  of  taxes  as  named  below.''"  That's 
not  our  line,  you  have  to  give  security.  "The  Office  of  the 
Widows'  Home  hereby  invites — "  Let  it  invite,  we  won't 
go.  "From  the  Orphans'  Court."  I  haven't  any  father  or 
mother,  myself.  [Examines  farther]  Aha !  Here  something's 
slipped  up!  Listen  here,  Lazar !  "Year  so-and-so,  twelfth 
day  of  September,  according  to  the  decision  of  the  Commerce 
Court,  the  merchant  Fedot  Seliverstov  Pleshkov,  of  the 
first  guild,  was  declared  an  insolvent  debtor,  in  consequence 
of  which — "  What's  the  use  of  explaining.?  Everybody 
knows  the  consequences.  There  you  are,  Fedot  Seliverstov ! 
What  a  grandee  he  was,  and  he's  gone  to  smash !  But  say, 
Lazar,  doesn't  he  owe  us  something? 

PoDKiiALYUZiN.  He  owcs  US  a  very  little,  sir.  They  took 
somewhere  between  six  and  eight  barrels  of  sugar  for  home 
use. 

BoLSHOv.  A  bad  business,  Lazar.  Well,  he'll  pay  me 
back  in  full,  out  of  friendliness. 

PoDKHALYUziN.  It's  doubtful,  sir. 

BoLSHOV.  We'll  settle  it  somehow.  [Reads]  "Moscow  mer- 
chant of  the  first  guild,  Antip  Sysoyev  Enotov,  declared  an 
insolvent  debtor—"     Does  he  owe  us  anything? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  For  vegetable  oil,  sir;  just  before  Lent 
they  took  about  three  kegs,  sir. 

BoLSHOV.  Those  blooming  vegetarians  that  keep  all  the 
fasts !  They  want  to  please  God  at  other  people's  expense. 
Brother,  don't  you  trust  their  sedate  ways !  Those  people 
cross  themselves  with  one  hand,  and  slip  the  other  into  your 
pocket.     Here's  the  third:   " Moscow  merchant  of  the  second 


^240*        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

guild,  Efrem  Lukiii  I'oluar.shinnikov,'  declared  an  insolvent 
debtor."     Well,  what  about  him  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  We  have  his  note,  sir. 

BoLSHOV.  Protested? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Yes,  sir.     He  himself  s  in  hiding,  sir. 

BoLSHOV.  Well !  And  the  fourth  there,  Samopalov. 
Why !  have  they  got  a  (-oniliination  against  us  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Sucli  an  underhanded  gang,  sir. 

BoLSHOV.  [ Turning  over  the  pages]  One  couldn't  get  through 
reading  them  until  to-morrow.     Take  it  away ! 

PODKHALYUZIN.  They  only  dirty  the  paper.  What  a 
moral  lesson  for  the  whole  merchant  corporation  !       [Silence. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  Good-by,  Samson  Silych,  I'll  run  home 
now;   I  have  some  little  matters  to  look  after. 

BoLSHOv.  You  might  sit  a  little  while  longer. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  No,  confound  it,  Samson  Silych,  I 
haven't  time.  I'll  come  to  you  as  early  as  possible  to-morrow 
morning. 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  as  you  choose ! 

RispOLOZHENSKY.  Good-by  !     Good-by,  Lazar  Elizarych  ! 

[He  goes  out. 

SCENE    XII 

BoLSHOV  and  Podkhalyuzin 

BoLSHOV.  Now  consider,  Lazar,  what  trading's  like:  just 
think  about  it.  You  think  it's  getting  money  for  nothing? 
"Money,  not  much!"  they  tell  you;  "ain't  seen  any  for  a 
long  time.  Take  my  note,"  they  say.  But  what  are  you 
going  to  get  from  some  people  on  a  note  ?  Here  I  have  about 
a  hundred  thousand  rubles'  worth  of  'em  lying  around,  and 

'  Half  a  yard. 


SCENE  XII       IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         241 

with  protests.  You  don't  do  anything  but  add  to  the  heap 
eacli  year.  If  you  want,  I'll  sell  you  the  whole  pile  for  half 
a  ruble  in  silver.  You'll  never  catch  the  men  who  signed 
'em  even  with  bloodhounds.  Some  have  died  off,  some  have 
run  away;  there's  not  even  a  single  man  to  put  in  the  pen. 
Suppose  you  do  send  one  there,  Lazar,  that  doesn't  do  you 
any  good;  some  of  'em  will  hold  on  so  that  you  can't  smoke 
'em  out.  "I'm  all  right  here,"  they  say,  "you  go  hang!" 
Isn't  that  so,  Lazar  .f* 

PoDKHALYuziN.  Just  SO,  that's  the  way  it  happens. 

BoLSHOv.  Always  notes,  notes !  But  what  on  earth  is 
a  note.''  Absolutely  nothing  but  paper,  if  I  may  say  so. 
And  if  you  discount  it,  they  do  it  at  a  rate  that  makes  your 
belly  ache,  and  you  pay  for  it  later  with  your  own  property. 
[After  a  brief  silence]  It's  better  not  to  have  dealings  with 
provincials:  always  on  credit,  always  on  credit;  and  if  he 
ever  does  bring  the  money,  it's  in  slick  small  change — you 
look,  and  there's  neither  head  nor  tail  to  the  coins,  and  the 
denomination's  rubbed  off  long  ago.  But  do  as  you  please 
here !  You'd  better  not  show  your  goods  to  the  tradesman 
of  this  place;  any  one  of  'em'U  go  into  anj^  warehouse  and 
sniff  and  peck,  and  peck,  and  then  clear  out.  It'd  be  all 
right  if  there  were  no  goods,  but  what  do  you  expect  a  man  to 
trade  in .''  I've  got  one  apothecary  shop,  one  dry  goods,  the 
third  a  grocery.  No  use,  none  of  them  pays.  You  needn't 
even  go  to  the  market;  they  cut  the  prices  down  worse  than 
the  devil  knows  what;  but  if  you  sell  a  horse-collar,  you  have 
to  throw  in  trimmings  and  earnest  money,  and  treat  the 
fellows,  and  stand  all  sorts  of  losses  through  wrong  weights. 
That's  the  way  it  goes  !     Don't  you  realize  that  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Seems  I  ought  to  realize  it,  sir. 

BoLSHOV.  There's  business  for  you,  and  that's  the  way  to 
do  it.  [Silence]  Well,  Lazar,  what  do  you  think.'' 


242  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  i 

PoDKiiALYUziN.  ^Vhat  sliould  I  think,  sir?  That's  just, 
as  you  please.     My  business  is  that  of  a  subordinate. 

BoLSiiov.  What  do  you  mean,  subordinate.''  Just  speak 
out  freely.     I'm  asking  you  about  the  business. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Again,  Samson  Silych,  it's  just  as  you 
please,  sir. 

BoLSHOV.  You  twaddle  one  thing:  "As  you  please." 
But  what  do  you  think  ? 

PoDKiiALYUziN.  That  I  can't  say,  sir. 

BoLSHOV.  [After  a  brief  silence]  Tell  me,  Lazar,  on  your 
conscience;  do  you  love  me.''  [Silence]  Do  you  love  me  or 
not?  Why  are  you  silent ?  [Silence]  I've  given  you  food  and 
drink,  set  you  up  in  the  world;    haven't  I? 

PoDKHALYuziN.  Oh,  Samsoii  Silych !  What's  the  use  of 
talking  about  it,  sir  ?  Don't  have  any  doubts  about  me ! 
Only  one  word:  I'm  just  such  as  you  see  me. 

BoLSHOv.  What  do  you  mean  by  that? 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Why,  if  you  need  anybody  or  anytliing 
whatsoever,  you  can  count  on  me.     I  shan't  spare  myself. 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  then,  there's  nothing  more  to  be  said. 
In  my  opinion,  Lazar,  now  is  the  most  proper  time;  we  have 
a  good  deal  of  ready  cash,  and  all  the  notes  have  fallen  due. 
What's  the  use  of  waiting  ?  You'll  wait,  if  you  please,  until 
some  merchant  just  like  yourself,  the  dirty  cur,  will  strip 
you  bare,  and  then,  you'll  see,  he'll  make  an  agreement  at 
ten  kopeks  on  the  ruble,  and  he'll  wallow  in  his  millions, 
and  won't  think  you're  worth  spitting  at.  But  you,  an 
honorable  tradesman,  must  just  watch  him,  and  suffer — keep 
on  staring.  Here's  what  I  think,  Lazar:  to  offer  the  cred- 
itors such  a  proposition  as  this — will  they  accept  from  me 
twenty-five  kopeks  on  the  ruble?     What  do  you  think? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Why,    according    to    my    notion,  Samson 


SCENE  XII       IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  243 

Silych,   if  you're  going  to  pay    at  the    rate  of  twenty-five 
kopeks,  it  would  be  more  decent  not  to  pay  at  all. 

BoLSHOV.  Why,  really,  that's  so.  You  won't  scare  any- 
body by  a  bluff;  but  it's  better  to  settle  the  affair  on  the 
quiet.  Then  wait  for  the  Lord  to  judge  you  at  the  Second 
Coniing.  Only  it's  a  heap  of  trouble.  I'm  going  to  mort- 
gage my  house  and  shops  to  you. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Impossible  to  do  it  without  some  bother, 
sir.  You'll  have  to  get  rid  of  the  notes  for  something,  sir; 
have  the  merchandise  transferred  somewhere  further  off. 
We'll  get  busy,  sir  ! 

BoLSHOV.  Just  so.  Although  an  old  man,  I'm  going  to 
get  busy.     But  are  you  going  to  help  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Good  gracious,  Samson  Silych,  I'll  go 
through  fire  and  water,  sir. 

BoLSHOv.  What  could  be  better !  Why  the  devil  should 
I  scratch  around  for  pennies.  I'll  make  one  swoop,  and  that's 
an  end  to  it !  Only  God  give  us  the  nerve !  Thanks,  Lazar. 
You've  treated  me  like  a  friend.  [He  rises]  Now,  get  busy ! 
[He  goes  up  to  him  and  taps  him  on  the  shoulder]  If  you  get 
the  thing  done  properly,  you  and  I'll  divide  the  profits. 
I'll  reward  you  for  the  rest  of  your  life. 

[He  goes  to  the  door. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  I  don't  need  anything,  Samson  Silych, 
except  your  peace  of  mind,  sir.  I've  lived  with  you  since 
my  earliest  years,  and  I've  received  countless  favors  from 
you;  it  may  be  said,  sir,  you  took  me  as  a  little  brat,  to 
sweep  out  your  shops;  consequently  I  simply  must  be  grate- 
ful. 


ACT    II 

Office  in  the  house  of  Bolshov.     Rear  centre  a  door;   on  the 
left  a  staircase  leading  to  the  floor  above. 

SCENE    I 
TiSHKA  near  the  front  of  the  stage,  with  a  brush 

TiSHKA.  What  a  life,  what  a  life !  Sweep  the  floors  before 
daylight !  And  is  it  my  business  to  sweep  floors  ?  Things 
aren't  the  same  here  as  with  decent  folks.  Now  if  the  other 
bosses  have  a  boy,  he  lives  with  the  boys;  that  is,  he 
hangs  around  the  shop.  But  with  me  it's  now  here,  now 
there,  tramp  the  pavement  all  day  as  if  you  were  crazy. 
You'll  soon  feather  your  nest — I  don't  think  !  Decent  people 
keep  a  porter  for  running  around ;  but  at  our  place  he  Hes  on 
the  stove  with  the  kittens,  or  he  hangs  around  with  the  cook; 
but  you're  in  demand.  At  other  people's  it's  easy-going;  if 
you  get  into  mischief  now  and  then,  tliey  make  allowances 
for  your  youth.  But  at  our  house — if  it  isn't  he,  then  it's 
somebody  else;  either  the  old  man  or  the  old  woman  will  give 
you  a  hiding;  otherwise  there's  the  clerk  Lazar,  or  there's 
Fominishna,  or  there's — any  old  rascal  can  lord  it  over  you. 
What  a  cursed  life  it  is !  But  if  you  want  to  tear  yourself 
away  from  the  house  and  go  somewhere  with  friends  to  play 
three-card  monte,  or  have  a  game  of  handball — don't  think  of 
such  a  thing !  Now,  really,  there's  something  feels  wrong  in 
my  head.  [He  climbs  upon  a  chair  on  his  knees  and  looks  in 
the  mirror]  How  do  you  do,  Tikhon  Savostyanovich !  How 
are    you    getting    along  ?     Are   you    all    top    notch  ?     Now, 

244 


SCENE  II         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         245 

then,  Tishka,  just  do  a  stunt.  [He  makes  a  grimace]  That's 
what!  [Another]  Exactly  like— — ■ 

[He  bursts  out  laughing. 

SCENE    II 

Tishka  and  Podkhalyuzin,  who  steals  in  and  seizes  him  by 
the  collar. 

Podkhalyuzin.  What  are  you  doing  there,  you  little 
imp.'* 

Tishka.  What .''  You  know  what !  I  was  wiping  off 
dust! 

Podkhalyuzin.  Were  you  wiping  it  off  with  your  tongue  ? 
As  if  you  could  find  any  dust  on  the  mirror !  I'll  show  j^ou 
some  dust !  You're  showing  off !  I'll  just  warm  up  the 
nape  of  your  neck  so  you'll  know  it. 

Tishka.  Know  what-f*     Now  what  have  I  done.'' 

Podkhalyuzin.  What  have  you  done.^  What  have  you 
done  ?  Say  another  word  and  you'll  find  out  what !  Just 
let  out  a  peep ! 

Tishka.  Yes,  a  peep  !  I'm  going  to  tell  the  boss,  and  then 
you'll  catch  it ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  Going  to  tell  the  boss !  What's  your 
boss  to  me?  Why,  if  it  came  to  that — what's  your  boss  to 
me! — Why,  you're  just  a  kid  that  has  to  be  taught;  what 
were  you  thinking  of  .-^  If  we  didn't  wallop  you  imps  there'd 
be  no  good  come  of  you.  That's  the  regular  way  of  doing 
things.  I,  myself,  my  boy,  have  come  through  fire,  water, 
and  copper  pipes. 

Tishka.  I  know  you  did. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Shhh — you  little  flevil !     [Threatening  him. 

Tishka.  Ha,  just  try  it !  I'll  sure  tell,  honest  to  good- 
ness I  will. 


246         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  n 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  What  are  you  going  to  tell,  you  devil's 
pepper-pot  ? 

TiSHKA,  What'll  I  say  ?     Why,  that  you  scold  ! 

PoDKHALYuziN.  Great  impression  that'll  make !  You're 
quite  a  gentleman !  Come  here,  sir !  Has  Sysoy  Psoich 
been  here? 

TisHKA.  He  sure  has. 

PoDKHALYuziN.  Talk  sense,  you  little  devil !  Was  he 
going  to  come  again  ? 

TisHKA.  He  was  that ! 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Well,  you  can  run  along,  now. 

TisHKA.  Do  you  want  any  vodka? 

PODKHALYUZIN.  Yes,  I  do.  I'll  have  to  treat  Sysoy  Psoich. 
[He  gives  inoneij]  Buy  a  bottle,  but  you  keep  the  change  for 
gingerbread.  But  see  that  you  hurry,  so  they  don't  miss 
you  here ! 

TisHKA.  I'll  be  home  before  a  short-haired  girl  can  twist 
her  braids.     Off  I  go,  liippity-hop. 


SCENE    III 

PODKHALYUZIN  olonc 

PODKHALYUZIN.  What  a  misfortune  !  Here's  where  a  mis- 
fortune has  come  upon  us  !  What's  to  be  done  now  ?  Well, 
it's  a  bad  business.  Now  we  can't  avoid  declaring  ourselves 
bankrupt.  Well,  suppose  the  boss  should  have  something 
left  over;  but  where  do  I  come  in?  What*  shall  I  do  with 
myself  ?  Sell  junk  in  the  second-hand  market !  I've  worked, 
I've  worked  about  twenty  years,  and  then  to  be  sent  ram- 
bling !  Now,  how  am  I  going  to  settle  this  matter  ?  Per- 
haps with  merchandise?  Here,  he  said  to  sell  the  notes. 
[He  draws  them  out  and  reads  them]  It  must  be  that  it's  going 


SCENE m       IT'S    A    FAMILY     AFFAIR         247 

to  be  possible  to  profit  by  it.  [He  walks  about  the  room]  They 
say  a  fellow  ought  to  know  what  conscience  is.  Well,  of 
course  he  ought  to;  but  in  what  sense  must  he  understand 
that?  Everybody  has  conscience  where  a  good  man  is  con- 
cerned; but  when  the  man  himself  is  cheating  others,  then 
where  does  your  conscience  come  in?  Samson  Silych  is  a 
very  rich  merchant,  and  has  hatched  up  this  whole  business 
now  just  to  kill  time,  so  to  speak.  But  I'm  a  poor  man  !  If 
I  should  make  a  little  extra  profit  in  this  business^then 
there  can't  be  any  sin  in  it;  because  he  himself  is  acting 
dishonorably,  and  going  against  the  law.  And  why  should  I 
pity  him?  The  course  is  clear;  well,  don't  slip  up  on  it:  he 
follows  his  politics,  and  you  look  out  for  your  interest.  I'd 
have  seen  the  tiling  through  with  liim,  but  I  don't  feel  like  it. 
Hm ! — What  day-dreams  will  come  into  a  man's  head !  Of 
course,  Olimpiada  Samsonovna  is  a  cultivated  young  lady; 
and  it  must  be  said,  there're  none  on  earth  like  her;  but  of 
course  that  suitor  won't  take  her  now;  he'll  say,  "Give  me 
money  !"  But  where  are  you  going  to  get  money  ?  And  now 
she  can't  marry  a  nobleman  because  she  hasn't  any  money. 
Sooner  or  later  they'll  have  to  marry  her  to  a  merchant.  [He 
walks  on  in  silence]  I'll  raise  the  dough,  and  bow  to  Samson 
Silych.  "Samson  Silych,"  says  I,  "I'm  at  an  age  when  I  must 
think  about  the  continuance  of  posterity;  and  I,  now,  Samson 
Silych,  haven't  grudged  my  sweat  and  blood  for  your  tranquil- 
lity. To  be  sure,  now,  Olimpiada  Samsonovna  is  a  cultivated 
young  lady;  but  I,  Samson  Silych,  am  no  common  trash; 
you  can  see  for  yourself,  if  you  please.  I  have  capital,  and 
I'm  a  good  manager  in  that  line."  Why  shouldn't  he  give 
her  to  me  ?  Ain't  I  a  man  ?  I  haven't  been  detected  in  any 
knavery;  I'm  respectful  to  my  elders.  But  in  addition  to 
all  that,  as  Samson  Silych  has  mortgaged  his  house  and  shops 
to  me,  I  can  frighten  him  with  the  mortgage.     Knowing  as 


248  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  ii 

I  do  the  disposition  of  Samson  Silych  to  be  what  it  is,  that 
may  very  easily  happen.  This  is  the  way  with  his  sort:  once 
they  get  an  idea  into  their  head,  you  simply  can't  drive  it  out. 
It's  just  as  when,  three  years  ago,  he  wanted  to  shave  his 
beard.  No  matter  how  much  Agrafena  Kondratyevna  begged 
and  wept.  "No,"  he  said,  "afterwards  I'll  let  it  grow  again; 
but  for  the  time  being  I'll  have  my  own  way."  And  he  took 
and  shaved  it.  It's  the  same  way  with  this  business;  if  I 
make  a  hit  with  him,  or  the  idea  strikes  him  all  right — 
then  it's  sweet  wedding-bells  to-morrow,  and  that's  all,  and 
don't  you  dare  argue !  I  could  jump  from  the  tower  of  Ivan 
the  Great  for  the  joy  of  it. 

Enter  Tishka  with  the  bottle. 


SCENE    IV 

PoDKHALYuziN  and  Tishka 

Tishka.  [Coming  in  with  the  bottle]  Here  I  am  !     I've  come. 
PoDKHALYUZiN.  Listen,    Tislika,    is    Ustinya    Naumovna 
here  ? 

Tishka.  Up-stairs  there.     And  the  shyster's  coming. 
PoDKHALYUZiN.  Well,   put  the  vodka  on   the  table,  and 
bring  some  relishes. 

Tishka  puts  down  the  vodka  and  brings  relishes;   then 
goes  out. 

SCENE    V 

Podkhalyuzin  and  Rispolozhensky 

Podkhalyuzin.  Ah,  my  respects  to  you,  sir ! 

Rispolozhensky.  Mine  to  you,  my  dear  Lazar  Elizarych, 
mine  to  you  !  Fine.  I  think,  now,  perhaps  there's  some- 
thing I  can  do.     Is  that  vodka,  near  you?     I'll  just  take  a 


SCENE  V         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         249 

thimbleful,  Lazar  Elizarych.  My  hands  have  begun  to  shake 
mornings,  especially  the  right  one.  When  I  go  to  write 
something,  Lazar  Elizarych,  I  have  to  hold  it  with  my  left. 
I  swear  I  do.  But  take  a  sip  of  vodka,  and  it  seems  to  do 
it  good.  [Drinks. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Why  do  your  hands  shake.'' 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  [Sits  (loivti  by  the  table]  From  anxiety, 
Lazar  Elizarych;  from  anxiety,  my  boy. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Indeed,  sir !  But  I  suppose  it's  because 
you're  plundering  people  overmuch.  God  i.?  punishing  you 
for  your  unrighteousness. 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  He,  he,  he  ! — Lazar  Elizarych !  How 
could  I  plunder  anybody  ?  My  business  is  of  a  small  sort. 
I'm  like  a  little  bird,  picking  up  small  grains. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  You  deal  in  small  quantities,  of  course? 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  You'd  deal  even  in  small  quantities  if 
you  couldn't  get  anything  else.  Well,  it  wouldn't  matter 
so  much  if  I  were  alone;  but,  you  see,  I  have  a  wife  and  four 
kiddies.  They  all  want  to  eat,  the  little  dears.  One  says, 
"Daddy,  give  me!"  Another  says,  "Daddy,  give  me!" 
And  I'm  a  man  who  feels  strongly  for  his  family.  Here  I 
entered  one  boy  in  the  high  school ;  he  has  to  have  a  uniform, 
and  then  something  else.  And  what's  to  become  of  the  old 
shack.'' — Why,  how  much  shoe-leather  you  wear  out  simply 
walking  from  Butirky  to  the  Voskresensky  Gates. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  That's  right,  sir. 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  And  why  do  you  make  the  trip  ?  You 
write  a  little  petition  for  one  man,  you  register  somebody 
else  in  the  citizen  class.  Some  days  you'll  not  bring  home 
half  a  ruble  in  silver.  I  vow,  I'm  not  lying !  Then  what're 
you  going  to  live  on  ?  Lazar  Elizarych,  I'll  just  take  a 
thimbleful.  [Drinks]  "So,"  I  think,  "I'll  just  drop  in  on 
Lazar  Elizarych;   perhaps  he'll  spare  me  a  little  change." 


250  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  ii 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  For  what  sort  of  knavery,  sir? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  What  do  you  mean  by  knavery  !  Come, 
that's  a  sin,  Lazar  Ehzarych !  Don't  I  serve  you  ?  I'm 
your  servant  till  the  grave;  command  me  what  j^ou  want. 
And  I  fixed  up  the  mortgage  for  you ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  See  here,  you've  been  paid !  And  it's 
not  your  business  to  keep  harping  on  the  same  string ! 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Just  so,  Lazar  Elizarych,  I've  been 
paid.  Just  so !  Ah,  Lazar  Elizarych,  poverty  has  crushed 
me ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Poverty  crushed  you !  Oh,  that  liap- 
pens,  sir.  [He  approaches  and  sits  down  hij  the  table]  Well, 
sir,  I  have  a  little  extra  money;   I've  no  place  to  put  it. 

[Lays  his  pockethook  on  the  table. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  What,  you,  Lazar  Elizarych.''  Extra 
money.'*     I'm  afraid  you're  joking. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  All  joking  aside,  sir. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Well,  if  you  have  a  little  extra  money, 
why  not  help  a  poor  man  ?     God'll  reward  you  for  it. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  But  (I'you  need  much  ? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Give  me  just  three  rubles. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Is  that  all,  sir? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Well,  give  me  five. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Oh,  ask  more ! 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Well,  then,  if  you'll  be  so  good,  give 
me  ten. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Ten,  sir  !     What,  for  nothing  ? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Indeed  not !  I'll  work  it  off,  Lazar 
Elizarych;  we'll  be  quits  sometime  or  other. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  That's  all  talk,  sir.  The  snail  keeps 
going,  and  sometime  she'll  get  there !  But  here's  the  little 
business  I  want  to  put  up  to  you  now:  did  Samson  Silych 
promise  you  mu(;h  for  fixing  up  this  scheme.'' 


SCENE  V         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         251 

RisPOLozHENSKY.  I'm  ashamed  to  tell  you,  Lazar  Eli- 
zarych !  A  thousand  rubles  and  an  old  coon-skin  overcoat. 
No  one  will  accept  less  than  I,  by  heavens;  just  go  and  in- 
quire prices. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Well,  here's  what,  Sysoy  Psoich;  I'll  give 
you  two  thousand  for  that  identical  business,  sir. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Oh,  Lazar  Elizarj'ch,  my  benefactor ! 
I  and  my  wife  and  children'll  be  your  slaves ! 

PoDKHALYUziN.  One  hundred  in  silver,  spot  cash;  but 
the  rest  later  upon  the  completion  of  the  whole  business,  sir ! 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Now,  then,  how  can  one  help  praying 
for  people  like  you !  Only  a  kind  of  ignorant  swine  could 
fail  to  feel  that.     I  bow  down  to  your  feet,  Lazar  Elizarych ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Really  now,  what  for,  sir?  Only,  Sysoy 
Psoich,  don't  run  about  like  a  chicken  with  its  head  cut  off, 
but  go  in  for  accuracy — straight  to  the  point,  and  walk  the 
line.     Do  you  understand,  sir? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  How  can  I  help  understanding?  Why, 
Lazar  Elizarych,  do  you  think  I'm  still  a  boy?  It's  time  I 
understood ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Yes,  but  what  do  you  understand  ? 
Here's  the  way  things  are,  sir.  Just  listen  first.  Samson 
Silych  and  I  came  to  town,  and  we  brought  along  the  Ust 
as  was  proper.  Then  he  went  to  the  creditors:  this  one 
didn't  agree,  that  one  didn't  agree;  that's  the  way,  and  not 
a  single  one  will  take  up  the  proposition.  That's  the  way  the 
affair  stands. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  What's  that  you  say,  Lazar  Elizarych  ? 
Oh !     Just  think  of  it,  what  a  gang. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  And  how  are  we  going  to  make  a  good 
thing  out  of  this  business  now  ?  Do  you  understand  me,  or 
not? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  That  is,  the  insolvency, Lazar  Elizarych  ? 


252  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  ii 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  The  insolvency  will  take  care  of  itself; 
but  I  mean  my  own  business  affairs. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  He,  he,  he ! — That  is,  the  house  and  the 
shops — even — the  house — he,  he,  he  ! 

PoDKHALYUziN.     What's  the  matter,  sir? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  No,  sir;  that's  just  my  foolishness;  I 
was  just  joking. 

PoDKHALYuziN.  Fine  jokes,  indeed !  Don't  j^ou  joke 
about  that,  sir.  The  house  is  nothing;  I  have  such  a  dream 
in  my  head  now  about  that  subject,  that  I  must  talk  it  over 
with  you  at  length.     Just  come  to  my  room,  sir.     Tishka ! 


SCENE    VI 

The  same  and  Tishka 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Put  all  this  in  order !  Well,  let's  go, 
Sysoy  Psoich ! 

Tishka  is  about  to  carry  away  the  vodka. 
RispoLOZHENSKY.  Wait,  wait !  Eh,  my  boy,  what  an 
idiot  you  are !  If  you  see  that  a  fellow  wants  to  drink,  just 
wait  a  bit.  You  just  wait  a  bit.  You're  young  yet,  but  you 
just  be  polite  and  condescending.  Lazar  Elizarych,  I'll  just 
take  a  thimbleful. 

PoDKHALYuziN.  Help  yourself,  only  hurry  up;  I'm  afraid 
he'll  come. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Right  away,  my  dear  Lazar  Elizarych, 
right  away  !  [Drinks  and  smacks  his  lips]  But  it  would  be 
better  to  take  it  with  us.  [They  go  out. 

Tishka  arranges  something  or  other;  from  above  de- 
scend Ustinya  Naumovna  and  Fominishna.  Tish- 
ka goes  out. 


SCENE  VI        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         253 

FoMlNiSHNA.  Now  do  fix  it  up  for  her,  Ustinya  Naumovna ! 
You  see  the  girl  is  all  worked  up;  and,  indeed,  it's  time,  my 
dear.  Youth  isn't  a  bottomless  kettle,  and  they  say  it  gets 
empty.  I  can  say  that  from  my  own  experience.  I  got  mar- 
ried when  I  was  thirteen;  hut  in  another  month  she'll  have 
passed  her  nineteenth  year.  Why  let  her  pine  away  for 
nothing.'*  Others  of  her  age  have  long  since  borne  children. 
And  so,  my  dear,  why  let  her  pine  away.'' 

UsTiNTA  Naumovna.  I  keep  thinking  about  that  myself, 
my  jewel;  but  the  thing  isn't  held  up  on  my  account;  I 
have  a  whole  pack  of  suitors,  all  right.  But,  confound  it, 
she  and  her  mother  are  mighty  particular. 

FoMiNiSHNA.  Why  should  they  be  particular.''  Well,  the 
chief  thing  is  that  they  should  be  fresh-complexioned  people, 
not  bald,  and  not  smell  bad;  and  then  anything'U  pass,  so 
it's  a  man ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  [Sitting  down]  Sit  down  a  minute, 
my  jewel.  I  have  worn  myself  out  the  livelong  day;  from 
early  morning  I've  been  tearing  around  like  a  wet  hen. 
But,  you  see,  I  couldn't  neglect  anything;  I'm  an  indis- 
pensable person  everywhere.  Naturally,  my  jewel,  every 
person  is  a  human  being:  a  man  needs  a  wife,  a  girl  a  hus- 
band; give  it  to  them  if  you  have  to  rob  the  cradle;  then 
here  and  there  there's  a  genuine  wedding.  And  who  fixes 
them  up  ?  Why,  I  do.  Ustinya  Naumovna  has  to  bear  the 
burden  for  all  of  them.  And  why  does  she  have  to-f*  Be- 
cause that's  the  way  things  are;  from  the  beginning  of  the 
world,  that's  the  way  the  wheel  was  wound  up.  However, 
to  tell  the  truth,  they  don't  cheat  me  for  my  trouble:  one 
gives  me  the  material  for  a  dress,  another  a  fringed  shawl, 
another  makes  up  a  cap  for  you,  and  here  and  there  you'll 
get  a  gold  piece,  and  here  and  there  something  better — 
just  what  the  job  deserves  and  they're  able  to  pay. 


254  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  n 

FoMiNiSHNA.  What's  the  use  of  talking,  my  dear;  what's 
the  use  of  talking  ! 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Sit  down,  Fominishna;  your  legs 
are  old  and  rickety. 

Fominishna.  Eh  !  Haven't  time,  my  dear  !  You  see,  it's 
just  awful;  because  he  doesn't  come  home  we're  all  scared 
to  death:  he  may  come  home  drunk  at  any  time.  And  then 
what  a  bad  one,  good  Lord  !     Then  what  a  row  he'll  kick  up. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Naturally;  a  rich  peasant  is  worse 
than  the  devil  to  talk  to. 

Fominishna.  We've  seen  him  do  terrible  tilings.  One 
night  last  week  he  came  home  drunk.  He  tore  around,  and 
what  a  row  !  It  was  simply  awful;  he  smashed  the  china — 
"Ooo!"  he  said,  "I'll  kill  the  whole  crowd  of  you  at  once!" 

Ustinya  Naltmovna.  Vulgarity ! 

Fominishna.  That's  the  truth,  my  dear.  But  I'll  just 
run  up-stairs,  darling — Agrafena  Kondratyevna  is  alone  in 
my  room.  Wlien  you're  going  home,  come  back  to  me;  I'll 
tie  up  a  bit  of  ham  for  you.  {She  mounts  the  stairs. 

Ustin/a  Naumovna.  I'll  follow,  my  jewel,  I'll  follow. 
Podkhalyuzin  enters. 

SCENE    VII 

Ustinya  Naumovna  and  Podkhalyuzin 

Podkhalyuzin.  Ah  !  Ustinya  Naumovna  !  It's  been  ages 
since  I've  seen  you,  ma'am. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  How  are  you,  dear  soul !  How've 
you  been  ? 

Podkhalyuzin.  Oh,  able  to  be  around,  ma'am. 

[He  sits  down. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  I'll  capture  a  little  mamzelle  for  you 
if  you  want  me  to. 


SCENE  VII       IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         255 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Thank  you  kindly — ^I  don't  need  one  yet. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  If  you  don't  want  one  yourself,  my 
jewel,  I'll  do  a  good  turn  for  your  friends.  I  suppose  you 
have  friends  around  town,  a  whole  pack. 

PoDKHAi-YuziN.  I  have  quite  a  few,  ma'am. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Well,  if  you  have,  thank  the  Lord ! 
If  you  know  of  a  marriageable  man,  whether  he's  a  bachelor, 
unmarried,  or  a  widower — drag  him  straight  to  me. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Will  you  find  him  a  wife? 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  I  will.  Why  shouldn't  I  find  him 
a  wife.''     I'll  do  it  in  a  jiffy. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  That's  very  fine,  ma'am,  But  now  I 
ask  you,  Ustinya  Naumovna,  why  do  you  come  here  to  us 
so  confoundedly  often  ? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  What's  that  to  you  ?  Why  shouldn't 
I  come.'*  I'm  no  thief,  no  sheep  without  a  name.  What 
do  you  mean  by  that  question .'' 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  But,  really,  aren't  you  wasting  your  time 
coming  ? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Wasting  my  time  ?  Where  did  you 
get  that  idea,  my  jewel  ?  Just  see  here,  what  sort  of  a 
husband  I've  found:  an  aristocrat,  has  peasants,  and  a  fine 
young  man. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Why  has  the  thing  come  to  a  halt,  ma'am  ? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  It  hasn't  come  to  a  halt !  He 
wanted  to  come  to-morrow  to  get  acquainted.  So  we'll 
hitch  him  up,  and  it'll  all  be  over. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Hitch  liim  up,  try  it — he'll  give  you  the 
slip. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  What's  the  matter,  are  you  in  your 
right  mind,  mj'  jewel  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  You'll  see ! 

Ustinya    Naumovna.  May    I    die    before    to-night,    but 


256  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  ii 

you're  either  drunk,  my  jewel,  or  you've  wandered  clean  out 
of  your  head. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Be  SO  good  as  not  to  trouble  yourself 
about  that;  you  look  out  for  yourself;  but  I  know  what  I 
know. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovka.  Well,  what  do  you  know? 

PoDKHALYuziN.  No  matter  what  I  know,  ma'am. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  If  you  know  something,  tell  me 
what  it  is:  I  suppose  your  tongue  won't  fall  off. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  That's  the  point  of  the  thing — that  I 
can't  tell  it. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Why  can't  you  .^  Why  do  you  hesi- 
tate to  tell  me,  my  jewel  '^  Go  ahead,  talk — it  doesn't  matter 
what  it  is. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  It's  not  a  matter  of  conscience.  But  if 
I  tell  you,  of  course  you'll  go  and  blab ! 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Curst  if  I  do !  You  may  chop  off 
my  hand  ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  That's  it,  ma'am;  a  promise  is  better  than 
money. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Of  course.     Well,  what  do  you  know  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Here's  what,  Ustinya  Naumovna:  isn't 
it  possible  to  throw  over  that  suitor  you've  found,  ma'am  ? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  What's  the  matter  with  you;  are 
you  gone  daft  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Gone  daft  notliing,  ma'am !  But  if  you 
want  to  have  a  heart-to-heart  talk,  honor  bright,  ma'am; 
then  here's  the  sort  of  thing  it  is,  ma'am:  at  my  house 
there's  a  certain  Russian  merchant  I  know,  who  is  very 
much  in  love  with  Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  ma'am.  "No 
matter  what  I  have  to  give,"  says  he,  "so  long  as  I  get  mar- 
ried," says  he;  "I  shan't  grudge  any  sum." 


SCENE  VII       IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         :257 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Why  didn't  you  tell  me  about  that 
before,  my  jewel  ? 

PoDKHALYUziN.  There  was  nothing  to  tell  for  the  good 
reason  that  I  only  just  now  found  out  about  it,  ma'am. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  But  it's  late  now,  my  jewel ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  And  what  a  suitor  he  is,  Ustinya  Nau- 
movna !  He'll  shower  you  with  gold  from  head  to  foot, 
ma'am;    he'll  have  a  cloak  made  for  you  out  of  live  sables. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  But,  my  dear,  it's  impossible!  I'd 
be  tickled  to  death,  but  I've  given  my  word. 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Just  as  you  plcasc,  ma'am !  But  if  you 
betroth  her  to  the  other  fellow,  you'll  bring  such  bad  luck 
upon  yourself,  that  you'll  not  get  clear  afterwards ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  But  just  consider  yourself,  how'U 
I  have  the  nerve  to  show  my  face  before  Samson  Silych?  I 
gave  it  to  him  hot  and  heavy:  that  the  fellow  is  rich,  and 
handsome,  and  so  much  in  love  that  he  is  half  dead;  and 
now  what'll  I  say .''  You  know  yourself  what  a  fellow  Sam- 
son Silych  is;  you  see  hell  pull  my  cap  over  my  ears  before 
you  know  it. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  PuU  your  cap  nothing,  ma'am ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  And  I've  got  the  girl  all  worked  up. 
Twice  a  day  she  sends  to  me  and  asks:  "What's  the  matter 
with  my  suitor?"  and,  "What's  he  Hke.''" 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  But  dou't  you  run  away  from  your  own 
good  fortiuie,  Ustinya  Naumovna.  Do  you  want  two  thou- 
sand rubles  and  a  sable  cloak  for  merely  arranging  this 
wedding,  ma'am  'i  But  let  our  understanding  about  the 
match  be  private.  I  tell  you,  ma'am,  tliat  this  suitor's 
such  a  sort  as  you've  never  seen:  there's  only  one  tiling, 
ma'am:    he's  not  of  aristocratic  origin. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  But  is  she  an  aristocrat?  Pity  if 
she  is,   my  jewel!     That's  the  way   things  go  these  days: 


258  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  ii 

every  peasant  girl  is  trying  to  worm  her  way  into  the  nobihty. 
— Now,  although  this  here  Olimpiada  Samsonovna — of  course, 
God  give  her  good  health — gives  presents  like  a  princess, 
yet,  believe  me,  her  origin's  no  better  than  ours.  Her  father, 
Samson  Silych,  dealt  in  leather  mittens  on  the  Balchug; 
respectable  people  called  him  Sammy,  and  fed  him  with 
thumps  behind  the  ears.  And  her  mother,  Agrafena  Kon- 
dratyevna,  was  little  more  than  a  peasant  girl,  and  he  got  her 
from  Preobrazhenskoye.  They  got  together  some  capital, 
climbed  into  the  merchant  class — so  the  daughter  has  her 
eye  peeled  for  the  title  of  princess.  And  all  that  through 
money.  How  much  worse  am  I  than  she?  Yet  I  have  to 
trot  at  her  heels.  God  knows  what  kind  of  bringing-up 
she's  had:  she  walks  like  an  elephant  crawls  on  his  belly; 
whether  French  or  piano,  it's  a  bit  here  and  a  bit  there,  and 
there's  nothing  to  it;  and  when  she  starts  to  dance — I  have 
to  stuff  a  handkerchief  in  my  mouth. 

PoDKHALYUziN.  But,  look  here — it'd  be  more  proper  for 
her  to  marry  a  merchant. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  But  how'U  I  stand  with  the  first 
suitor,  my  jewel .''  I've  already  assured  him  that  Olimpiada 
Samsonovna  is  such  a  beauty,  that  she's  the  real  ticket  for 
him;  "and  educated,"  I  said,  "in  French,  and  is  trained  in 
all  sorts  of  society  ways."  And  now  what  am  I  going  to 
say  to  him  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Why,  just  tell  him  also:  "Now,  she  is  a 
beauty,  and  cultivated  in  a  good  many  ways;  only  they've 
lost  all  their  money."     And  he'll  break  off  himself ! 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Well,  now,  that's  so,  my  jewel ! 
But,  no,  wait !  You  see  I  told  him  that  Samson  Silych  is 
rolling  in  money. 

PoDKiiALYUziN.  See  here,  you  talk  too  much.  But  how 
do  you  know  how  much  money  Samson  Silych  has;  you 
haven't  counted  it,  have  you? 


SCENE  vn       IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         259 

UsTiNYA  Natjmovna.  Ask  anybody  you  please;  every  one 
knows  that  Samson  Silych  is  the  richest  sort  of  niercliant. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Yes !  Much  you  know !  But  what'll 
happen  when,  after  you've  engaged  a  man  of  standing, 
Samson  Silych  won't  give  any  money  ?  Afterwards  the  fel- 
low'll  come  up  and  say,  says  he:  "I'm  no  merchant,  that  you 
can  cheat  me  out  of  the  dowry !"  Furthermore,  like  a  man 
of  standing  he'll  file  a  complaint  at  court,  because  a  man  of 
standing  has  his  own  way  everywhere,  ma'am;  then  Samson 
Silych  and  I'll  be  ruined,  and  there'll  be  no  getting  out  of  it 
for  you.  Here,  you  yourself  know  you  can  cheat  anybody 
of  our  sort  out  of  a  dowry,  that'll  work;  but  just  try  to  fool 
a  man  of  standing,  and  you'll  not  get  away  with  it  afterwards. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  That's  enough  trying  to  scare  nie ! 
You've  muddled  my  head  completely. 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Here,  take  these  hundred  rubles  in  silver 
as  earnest-money,  and  give  us  your  hand  on  it,  ma'am. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  And  you  say,  my  jewel,  two  thou- 
sand rubles  and  a  sable  cloak  ? 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Exactly  so,  ma'am.  Be  at  rest  on  that 
score ! — And  you'll  put  on  that  sable  cloak,  Ustinya  Nau- 
movna, and  you'll  go  out  walking — why,  anybody  will  think 
you're  a  general's  wife. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Do  you  think  so?  Well,  now,  in- 
deed !  When  I  put  on  that  sable  cloak,  I'll  look  my  perki- 
est, with  my  hands  by  my  sides;  then  your  bearded  friends 
will  stare  with  their  mouths  wide  open.  They'll  get  to  sigh- 
ing so  that  you  couldn't  stop  them  with  a  fire  engine;  the 
women  will  all  turn  up  their  noses  from  jealousy. 

PODKHALYUZIN.  Just  SO,  ma'am  ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Give  me  the  earnest-money !  Here 
goes ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  But,  Ustinya  Naumovna,  you're  doing 
this  of  your  own  free  will;  don't  back  out. 


260  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  u 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Back  out,  what  for?  Just  look: 
two  thousand  rubles,  and  a  sable  eloak ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  I  tell  you,  we'll  make  it  out  of  live  sa- 
bles.    There's  nothing  more  to  be  said. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Well,  good-by,  my  emerald !  I'll 
run  off  now  to  the  suitor.  We'll  see  each  other  to-morrow, 
and  then  I'll  report  to  you. 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Wait  a  minute !  Where're  you  going ! 
Just  follow  me — we'll  just  take  a  drink  of  vodka,  ma'am. 
Tishka !  Tishka !  [Enter  Tishka]  You  keep  a  lookout,  and 
if  you  see  the  boss  coming,  run  for  me  straight  off. 

[They  go  out. 

SCENE    VIII 

Tishka  alone. 

Tishka.  [Sits  down  beside  the  table  and  takes  some  money 
out  of  his  pocket]  Half  a  ruble  in  silver — that's  what  Lazar 
gave  me  to-day.  And  the  other  day,  when  I  fell  from  the 
steeple,  Agrafena  Kondratyevna  gave  me  ten  kopeks;  I 
won  twenty-five  kopeks  at  heads  and  tails;  and  day  before 
yesterday  the  boss  forgot  and  left  one  whole  ruble  on  the 
counter.  Gee,  here's  money  for  you !  [He  counts  to  himself. 
The  voice  of  Fominishna  is  heard  behind  the  scene:  "Tislika, 
oh,  Tishka!  How  long  have  I  got  to  call  you?"]  Now 
what's  the  matter  there?  ["Is  Lazar  at  home?"] — He  was, 
but  he's  sure  gone  now !  ["Well,  where  has  he  sneaked  to?"] 
How  in  the  world  should  I  know  ?  He  doesn't  ask  my  leave. 
If  he  had,  I'd  know. 

Fominishna  comes  down  the  stairs. 

Fominishna.  You  see  Samson  Silych  has  come,  and  seems 
to  be  tipsy. 

Tishka.  Phew  !     We're  goners  ! 


SCENE  IX        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         261 

FoMiNiSHNA.  Run  for  Lazar,  Tishka;  there's  a  dear;  run 
quick ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  [Appearing  at  the  head  of  the 
stairs]  What's  this,  Fominishna  dear,  where's  he  bound  for  ? 
Fominishna.  This  way,  I  guess,  my  dear !     Ah,  I'll  close 
the  doors,  good  heavens,   I'll  close  them;    let  him  go  up- 
stairs, but  3'ou  stay  here,  my  dear. 

A  knock  at  the  door,  and  the  voice  of  Samson  Silych: 
''Hey!  open  up;   who's  there?"     Agrafena  Kon- 
dratyevna disappears. 
Fominishna.  Come  in,  honey,  come  in  and  go  to  sleep; 
God  bless  you ! 

BoLSHOV.  [Behind  the  door]  What's  the  matter  with  you, 
you  old  cripi^le;  have  you  lost  your  wits  ? 

Fominishna.  Ah,  my  dear  boy !  Ah,  I'm  a  blind  old 
granny.  But,  you  see,  I  was  fool  enough,  somehow,  to  think 
you'd  come  home  tipsy.  Forgive  me,  I've  gotten  deaf  in 
my  old  age. 

Samson  Silych  comes  in. 

SCENE    IX 

Fominishna  and  Bolshov 

BoLSHOV.  Has  that  shyster  been  cooking  up  any  deviltry 
here  ^ 

Fominishna.  They've  cooked  cabbage  soup  with  corned 
beef,  and  roast  goose. 

Bolshov.  Are  you  gone  daft,  you  old  fool .'' 

Fominishna.  No,  dear!  I  gave  the  order  to  the  cook 
myself ! 

Bolshov.  Get  out!  [He  sits  dovm. 

Fominishna  goes  to  the  door;  Podkhalyuzin  and 
Tishka  come  in. 


2C2  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  n 

FoMiNisHNA.  [Returning]  Ah,  I'm  a  fool,  a  fool !  Don't 
punish  mc  for  my  bad  memory.  The  cold  roast  sucking  pig 
had  entirely  jumped  out  of  my  mind. 

SCENE    X 

PODKHALYUZIN,  BoLSHOV,  and  TiSHKA 

BoLSHOV.  Go  to  the  pigs  yourself !  [Fominishna  goes  out. 
To  Tishka]  What  are  you  gaping  at?  Haven't  you  any- 
thing to  do  ? 

PoDKHALYUziN.  [To  Tishka]  You've  been  spoken  to, 
haven't  you  ? 

Tishka  goes  out. 

BoLSHOv.  Has  the  shyster  been  here? 

PoDKHALYUziN.  He  has,  sir. 

BoLSHOv.  Did  you  talk  with  him  ? 

PODKHALYUZIN.  Why,  Samson  Silych?  Does  he  have 
any  feeling?  Isn't  his  soul  naturally  nothing  but  ink,  sir? 
He  just  thrums  on  one  string — to  declare  yourself  bankrupt. 

BoLSHOV.  If  I  must  declare  myself  bankrupt,  I'll  do  it, 
and  there's  an  end  to  it. 

PODKHALYUZIN.  Ah,  Samsou  Silych,  what's  that  you're 
saying ! 

BoLSHOV.  What !  pay  out  money  ?  Where  did  you  get 
that  notion  ?  I  will  rather  burn  everything  in  the  fire,  before 
I'll  give  them  a  kopek.  Transfer  the  merchandise,  sell  the 
notes,  let  'em  pilfer,  let  anybody  steal  who  wants  to;  but  I'm 
not  going  to  pay  a  kopek. 

PODKHALYUZIN.  Pardon  me,  Samson  Silych,  we  had  the 
business  all  going  fine;  and  now  everything  has  to  be  thrown 
into  confusion. 

BoLSHOv.  What  affair  was  it  of  yours?  It  ain't  yours. 
You  just  work  hard — I'll  not  forget  you. 


SCENE  X         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         263 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  I'm  not  in  need  of  anything  after  the 
kindness  you  have  shown  me,  and  you're  quite  wrong  in 
having  any  such  idea  about  me.  I'm  ready  to  give  away  my 
whole  soul  for  you,  and  by  no  means  to  do  anything  tricky. 
You're  getting  on  in  years;  Agrafena  Kondratyevna  is  a  very 
gentle  lady;  Olimpiada  Samsonovna  is  an  accomplished 
young  lady,  and  of  suitable  j-ears;  and  you've  got  to  spend 
some  thought  on  her.  But  now  such  are  the  circumstances; 
there's  no  knowing  what  may  come  of  all  this. 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  what  could  come  of  it  'i  I'm  the  only 
one  responsible. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Why  talk  about  you !  You,  Samson 
Silych,  have  already  had  a  long  life;  thank  God,  you're  in  a 
ripe  old  age;  but  Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  of  course,  is  a  young 
lady  whose  like  can't  be  found  on  earth.  I'm  speaking  to 
you  conscientiously,  Samson  Silych;  that  is,  absolutely  ac- 
cording to  my  feelings.  If  I'm  exerting  myself  on  j'our  be- 
half now,  and  am  putting  in  my  whole  strength,  too,  it  may 
be  said,  grudging  neither  sweat  nor  blood — then  it's  mostly 
because  I'm  sorry  for  your  family. 

BoLSHOV.  Come,  really  now  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  If  you  please,  sir.  Now,  suppose  all  this 
ends  well.  Very  good,  sir.  You'll  have  something  left 
with  which  to  establish  Olimpiada  Samsonovna. — Well,  of 
that  there's  nothing  to  say;  let  there  be  money,  and  suitors'll 
be  found,  sir.  Well,  but  what  a  sin.  Lord  save  us  !  if  they 
object,  and  begin  to  hound  you  through  the  courts;  and 
such  a  stigma  falls  upon  the  family,  and  if,  furtliermore,  they 
should  take  away  the  property.  Sir,  the  ladics'd  be  obliged 
to  endure  hunger  and  cold,  and  without  any  care,  like  shelter- 
less birdies.  But  Lord  save  them  from  that !  What  would 
happen  then  .'*  \lle  weeps. 

BoLSHOV.  What  are  you  crying  about? 


264  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  ii 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Of  course,  Samson  Silych,  I  merely  say 
that  just  for  instance — talk  at  the  right  time,  keep  still  at 
the  wrong  time;  words  don't  hurt.  But  you  see,  the  Old 
Nick  is  powerful — he  shakes  the  hills. 

BoLSHOV.  What's  to  be  done,  my  boy.'  Evidently  such 
is  the  will  of  God,  and  you  can't  oppose  it. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  That's  just  it,  Samson  Silych !  But  all 
the  same,  according  to  my  foolish  way  of  reasoning,  you 
should  settle  Olimpiada  Samsonovna  in  good  time  upon  a 
good  man;  and  then  she  will  be,  at  any  rate,  as  if  behind  a 
stone  wall,  sir.  But  the  cliief  thing  is  that  the  man  should 
have  a  soul,  so  that  he'll  feel.  As  for  that  noble's  courting 
Olimpiada  Samsonovna — why  he's  turned  tail  already. 

BoLSHOV.  Turned  tail  how  ?     What  gave  you  that  notion  ? 

PoDKAHLYUZiN.  It  isn't  a  notion,  Samson  Silych.  You 
ask  Ustinya  Naumovna.  Must  be  some  one  who  knows  him 
heard  something  or  other. 

BoLSHOV.  What  of  it !  As  my  affairs  are  going  now  there's 
no  need  of  such  a  person. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Samson  Silych,  just  take  into  considera- 
tion !  I'm  a  stranger,  and  no  relative  of  yours,  but  for  the 
sake  of  your  well-being  I  know  no  rest  by  day  or  by  night, 
my  very  heart  is  all  withered.  But  they're  marrying  to  him 
the  young  lady  who,  it  may  be  said,  is  an  indescribable  beauty; 
and  they're  giving  money,  sir;  but  he  swaggers  and  carries 
it  high !     Well,  is  there  any  soul  in  him,  after  all  that  ? 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  if  he  don't  want  her  he  needn't  have  her, 
and  we  won't  cry  about  it. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  No,  Samson  Silych,  you  just  consider 
about  that:  has  the  man  any  soul?  Here  I  am,  a  total 
stranger,  yet  I  can't  see  all  this  without  tears.  Just  under- 
stand that,  Samson  Silych  !  Nobody  else  would  care  enough 
about  it  to  pine  away  because  of  another  man's  business,  sir. 


SCENE  X         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         265 

But  you  see,  even  if  you  drive  me  out  now,  even  if  you  beat 
me,  still  I  won't  leave  you;  because  I  cannot — I  haven't 
that  kind  of  a  heart. 

BoLSHOV.  But  how  in  the  world  could  you  think  of  leav- 
ing me?  You  see  my  only  hope  now  is  you.  I'm  old,  and 
my  affairs  have  gotten  into  a  tight  fix.  Just  wait !  It  may 
be  we'll  still  swing  some  kind  of  a  deal  such  as  you're  not 
expecting. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Oh,  I  can't  do  that,  Samson  Silych. 
Just  understand  this  much:  I'm  absolutely  not  that  kind 
of  a  man !  To  anybody  else,  Samson  Silych,  of  course  it's 
all  the  same;  he  doesn't  care  whether  the  grass  grows;  but 
I  can't  do  that  way,  sir.  Kindly  see  yourself,  sir,  whether 
I'm  hustling  or  not.  I'm  simply  wasting  away  now  like 
some  poor  devil,  on  account  of  your  business,  sir;  because 
Fm  not  that  kind  of  a  man,  sir.  I'm  doing  all  this  because 
I  feel  sorry  for  you,  and  not  for  you  so  much  as  for  your 
family.  You  ought  to  realize  that  Agrafena  Kondratyevna 
is  a  very  tender  lady,  Olimpiada  Samsonovna  a  young  lady 
whose  like  can't  be  found  on  earth,  sir — — 

BoLSHOV.  Not  on  earth?  Look  here,  brother,  aren't  you 
hinting  around  a  little? 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Hinting,  sir  ?     No,  I  didn't  mean,  sir  ! 

BoLSHOV.  Aha  !  Brother,  you'd  better  speak  more  openly. 
Are  you  in  love  with  Olimpiada  Samsonovna? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Why,  Samson  Silych,  must  be  you  want 
to  joke  me. 

BoLSHOV.  Joke,  fiddlesticks !     I'm  asking  you  seriously. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Good  licaveus,  Samson  Silych,  could  I 
dare  think  of  such  a  thing,  sir? 

BoLSHOV.  Why  shouldn't  you  dare?  Is  she  a  princess 
or  something  like  that  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Maybe  she's  no  princess;    but  as  you've 


266  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  ii 

been  my  benefactor  and  taken  the  place  of  my  own  father — 
But  no,  Samson  Silych,  how  is  it  possible,  sir,  how  can  I 
help  feeling  it ! 

BoLsiiov.  Well,  then,  I  suppose  you  don't  love  her? 

PoDKiiALYUZix.  How  Can  I  help  loving  her,  sir?  Good 
gracious,  it  seems  as  if  I  loved  her  more  than  anything  on 
earth.     But  no,  Samson  Silych,  how  is  it  possible,  sir ! 

BoLSHOv.  You  ought  to  have  said:  "I  love  her,  you  see, 
more  than  anything  on  earth." 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  How  cau  I  liclp  loving  her,  sir?  Please 
consider  yourself:  all  day,  I  think,  and  all  night,  I  think — 
Oh,  dear  me,  of  course  Olimpiada  Samsonovna  is  a  young 
lady  whose  like  can't  be  found  on  earth —  But  no,  that 
cannot  be,  sir.     What  chance  have  I,  sir  ? 

BoLSHOV.  What  cannot  be,  you  poor  soft-head? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  How  can  it  be  possible,  Samson  Silych? 
Knowing  you,  sir,  as  I  do,  like  my  own  father,  and  Olimpiada 
Samsonovna,  sir;  and  again,  knowing  myself  for  what  I'm 
worth— what  chance  have  I  with  my  calico  snout,  sir? 

BoLSHOV.  Calico  nothing.  Your  snout'U  do !  So  long 
as  you  have  brains  in  your  head — and  you  don't  have  to 
borrow  any;  because  God  has  endowed  you  in  that  way. 
Well,  Lazar,  suppose  I  try  to  make  a  match  between  you  and 
Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  eh?  That  indescribable  beauty, 
eh? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Good  gracious,  would  I  dare  ?  It  may  be 
that  Olimpiada  Samsonovna  won't  look  kindly  on  me,  sir! 

BoLSHOV.  Nonsense  !  I  don't  have  to  dance  to  her  piping 
in  my  old  age !  She'll  marry  the  man  I  tell  her  to.  She's 
my  child:  if  I  want,  I  can  eat  her  with  my  nuisli,  or  churn 
her  into  butter !     You  just  talk  to  me  about  it ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  I  (lou't  dare,  Samson  Silych,  talk  about 
it  with  you,  sir !     I  don't  want  to  appear  a  scoundrel  to  you. 


SCENE  X         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         267 

BoLSHOV.  Get  along  witli  you,  you  foolish  youngster ! 
If  I  didn't  love  you,  would  I  talk  with  you  like  this?  Do 
you  understand  that  I  can  make  you  happy  for  life?  I  can 
simply  make  your  life  for  you. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  And  don't  I  love  you,  Samson  Silych, 
more  than  my  own  father  ?  Damn  it  all ! — what  a  brute 
I  am. 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  but  you  love  my  daughter? 

PoDKHALYUziN.  I've  wasted  away  entirely,  sir.  My 
whole  soul  has  turned  over  long  since,  sir ! 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  if  your  soul  has  turned  over,  we'll  set  you 
up  again.     Johnny's  the  boy  for  our  Jenny ! 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Daddy,  why  do  you  favor  me?  I'm  not 
worth  it.  I'm  not  worth  it !  My  poor  face  would  positively 
crack  a  mirror. 

BoLSHOV.  What  of  your  face !  Here,  I  transfer  all  the 
property  to  you;  so  that  afterwards  the  creditors  will  be 
sorry  that  they  didn't  take  twenty-five  kopeks  on  the  ruble. 

PODKHALYUZIN.  You  can  bet  they'll  be  sorry,  sir ! 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  you  get  off  to  town  now,  and  after  a  while 
come  back  to  the  girl;    we'll  play  a  little  joke  on  'em. 

PODKHALYUZIN.  Very  good,  daddy,  sir !  [They  go  out. 


ACT   III 

Setting  as  in  Act  I 

SCENE    I 

BoLSHOV  comes  in  and  sits  down  in  the  armehair;   for  some 
time  he  looks  into  the  corners  and  yawns. 

BoLSHOV.  Here's  the  life;  it's  well  said :  vanity  of  vanities, 
and  all  is  vanity.  The  devil  knows,  I  myself  can't  make 
out  what  I  want.  If  I  were  to  take  a  snack  of  something, 
I'd  spoil  my  dinner,  and  if  I  sit  still  I'll  go  crazy.  Perhaps 
I  might  kill  a  little  time  drinking  tea.  [Silence]  Here's  all 
there  is  to  it;  a  man  lives,  and  lives,  and  all  at  once  he  dies 
and  he  turns  to  dust.     Oh,  Lord,  oh.  Lord ! 

\He  yawns  and  looks  into  the  corners. 

SCENE    II 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna  comes  in  with  Lipochka,  who  is 
very  much  dressed  up. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Get  along,  get  along,  my  dar- 
ling; don't  catch  j'ourself  on  the  sides  of  the  doorway.  Just 
look,  Samson  Silych,  my  dear  lord  and  master,  and  admire 
how  I've  rigged  up  our  daughter  !  Phew  !  go  away  !  What 
a  peony-rose  she  is  now  !  [To  her]  Ah,  you  little  angel,  you 
l>rincess,  you  little  cherub,  you!  [To  him]  Well,  Samson 
Silych,  isn't  it  all  right?  Only  she  ought  to  ride  in  a  six- 
horse  carriage. 

BoLSHOV.  She'll  go  in  a  two-horse  carriage — she's  no  high- 
flying proprietress. 

268 


SCENE  II        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         269 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  To  be  sure,  she's  no  general's 
daughter,  but,  all  the  same,  she's  a  beauty !  Well,  pet  the 
child  a  little;   what  are  you  growling  like  a  bear  for? 

BoLSHOv.  Well,  how  do  you  want  me  to  pet  her?  Shall 
I  lick  her  hands,  or  bow  down  to  her  feet?  Fine  circus,  I 
must  say !     I've  seen  something  more  elegant  than  that. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  But  what  have  you  seen? 
No  matter  what;  but  this  is  your  daughter,  your  own  child, 
you  man  of  stone  ! 

BoLSHOV.  What  if  she  is  my  daughter  ?  Thank  God  she 
has  shoes,  dresses,  and  is  well  fed — what  more  does  she 
want  ? 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  What  more !  Look  here, 
Samson  Silych,  have  you  gone  out  of  your  head  ?  Well  fed  ! 
What  if  she  is  well  fed !  According  to  the  Christian  law  we 
should  feed  everybody;  people  look  after  strangers,  to 
say  nothing  of  their  own  folks.  Why,  it's  a  sin  to  say 
that,  when  people  can  hear  you.  Anyhow,  she's  your  own 
child  ! 

BoLSHOV.  I  know  she's  my  own  child — but  what  more 
does  she  want?  What  are  you  telling  me  all  these  yarns 
for  ?  You  don't  have  to  put  her  in  a  picture-frame !  I 
know  I'm  her  father. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Then,  my  dear,  if  you're  her 
father,  then  don't  act  like  a  stepfather !  It's  high  time,  it 
seems  to  me,  that  you  came  to  your  senses.  You'll  soon 
have  to  part  with  her, and  you  don't  grind  out  one  kind  word; 
you  ought,  for  her  good,  to  give  her  a  bit  of  good  advice. 
You  haven't  a  single  fatherly  way  about  you  ! 

BoLSHOv.  No,  and  what  a  pity;  must  be  God  made  me 
that  way. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  God  made  you  that  way ! 
What's  the  matter  with  you  ?     It  seems  to  me  God  made  her, 


270  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  m 

too,  didn't  he?     She's  not  an   animal.  Lord   forgive  me  for 
speaking  so  ! — but  ask  her  something  ! 

BoLSHOV.  What  shall  I  ask  her?  A  goose  is  no  playmate 
for  a  pig;  do  what  you  please. 

Agrafena  Kondkatyevna.  We  won't  ask  you  when  it 
comes  to  the  point ;  meantime,  say  something.  A  man,  a 
total  stranger,  is  coming — no  matter  how  much  you  try,  a 
man  is  not  a  woman — he's  coming  for  his  first  visit,  when 
we've  never  seen  him  before. 

BoLSHov.  I  said,  stop  it ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  What  a  father  you  are  !  And 
yet  you  call  yourself  one !  Ah,  my  poor  abandoned  little 
girl,  you're  just  like  a  little  orphan  with  drooping  head  !  He 
turns  away  from  you,  and  won't  recognize  you  !  Sit  down, 
Lipochka;  sit  down,  little  soul,  my  charming  little  darling! 

[She  makes  her  sit  down. 

Lipochka.  Oh,  stop  it,  mamma !  You've  mussed  me  all 
up ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  All  right,  then,  I'll  look  at 
you  from  a  distance. 

Lipochka.  Look  if  you  want  to,  only  don't  rave !  Fudge, 
mamma,  one  can't  dress  up  properly  without  your  going  off 
into  a  sentimental  fit. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  So,  so,  my  dear !  But  when 
I  look  at  you,  it  seems  such  a  pity. 

Lipochka.  Why  so  ?     It  had  to  come  some  time. 

Agrafena  KoNDRATYE\'isrA.  All  the  same,  it's  a  pitj',  you 
little  fool.  We've  been  raising  you  all  these  years,  and  you've 
grown  up — but  now  for  no  reason  at  all  we're  giving  you  over 
to  strangers,  as  if  we  were  tired  of  you,  and  as  if  you  bored 
us  by  your  foolish  cliildishuess,  and  by  your  sweet  behavior. 
Here,  we'll  jnick  you  out  of  the  house,  like  an  enemy  from  the 
town;    then  we'll  come  to,  and  look  around,  and  you'll  be 


SCENE  III        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         271 

gone  forever.  Consider,  good  people,  what  it'll  be  like, 
living  in  some  strange,  far-away  place,  choking  on  another's 
bread,  and  wiping  away  your  tears  with  your  fist !  Yes, 
good  God,  she's  marrying  beneath  her;  some  blockhead  will 
be  butting  in — a  blockhead,  the  son  of  a  blockhead  ! 

[She  weeps. 

LiPOCHKA.  There  you  go,  crying !  Honestly,  aren't  you 
ashamed,  mamma  ?     What  do  you  mean  by  blockhead  ? 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  [Weeping]  The  words  came 
out  of  themselves.     I  couldn't  help  it. 

BoLSHOv.  What  made  you  start  this  bawling.'  If  any- 
body asks  you,  you  don't  know  yourself. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  I  don't  know,  my  dear,  I 
don't  know;  the  fit  just  came  over  me. 

BoLSHOV.  That's  it,  just  foolishness.  Tears  come  cheap 
with  you. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Yes,  my  dear,  they  do  !  They 
do  !  I  know  myself  that  they  come  cheap;  but  how  can  you 
help  it  ? 

LiPOCHKA.  Fudge,  mamma,  how  you  act !  Stop  it !  Now, 
he'll  come  any  moment — what's  the  use? 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  I'll  stop,  child,  I'll  stop;  I'll 
stop  right  off ! 

SCENE    III 

The  same,  and  Ustinya  Naumovna 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  [Entering]  How  are  you,  my  jewels ! 
What  are  you  gloomy  and  down  in  the  dumps  for.^* 

[Kisses  are  exchanged. 
Agrafena  Kondratyevtsta.  We'd  about  given  you  up. 
LiPOCHKA.  Well,  Ustinya  Naumovna,  will  he  come  soon  ? 
Ustinya  Naumovna.  It's  my  fault,  I  own  up  at  once; 


272  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  m 

it's  my  fault !  But  our  affairs,  my  jewels,  aren't  in  a  very 
good  way. 

LiPocHKA.  How  !     What  do  you  mean  by  that  ? 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Now  what  new  notion  have 
you  got  ? 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Why,  my  pearls,  our  suitor  is  waver- 
ing. 

BoLSHOV.  Ha,  ha,  ha !  You're  a  great  go-between ! 
How  are  you  going  to  make  a  match  .f* 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  He's  like  a  balky  horse,  he  won't 
whoa  nor  giddup.     You  can't  get  a  sensible  word  out  of  him. 

LiPOCHKA.  But  what's  this,  Ustinya  Naumovna.''  What 
do  you  mean,  really .'' 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Holy  saints  !     How  can  it  be  ! 

LiPOCHKA.  Have  you  just  seen  him  ? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  I  was  at  his  house  this  morning. 
He  came  out  just  as  he  was,  in  his  dressing-gown;  but  he 
treated  me,  be  it  said  to  his  honor.  He  ordered  coffee,  and 
rum,  and  heaps  of  fancy  crackers — simply  piles  of  them. 
"Eat  away!"  says  he,  "Ustinya  Naumovna."  I  had  come 
on  business,  j'ou  know,  so  it  was  necessary  to  find  out  some- 
thing definite.  So  I  said:  "You  wanted  to  go  to-day  and 
get  acquainted."  But  on  that  subject  he  wouldn't  say  a 
sensible  word  to  me.  "Well,"  he  said,  "we'll  think  it  over, 
and  advise  about  it."  And  all  he  did  was  pull  at  the  cords 
of  his  dressing-gown. 

LiPOCHKA.  Why  does  he  just  fold  liis  arms  and  senti- 
mentalize? Why,  it's  disgusting  to  see  how  long  this 
lasts. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Really,  now,  why  is  he  show- 
ing off.^     Aren't  we  as  good  as  he  is? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Plague  take  him;  can't  we  find 
another  fellow  ? 


SCENE  III        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         273 

BoLSHOV.  Don't  you  look  for  another,  or  the  same  thing 
will  happen  again.     I'll  find  another  for  you  myself. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Yes,  much  you  will,  unless 
you  get  down  off  the  stove  and  hustle.  You've  actually 
forgotten,  I  think,  that  you  have  a  daughter. 

BoLSHOv.  We'll  see ! 

Agsafena   Kondratyevna.  We'll   see  what?     We'll   see 

nothing !     Bah — don't  talk  to  me,  please;    don't  aggravate 

me.  [She  sits  down. 

BoLSHov   bursts  out  laughing;    Ustinya  Naumovna 

walks  off  with  Lipochka  to  the  other  side  of  the  stage. 

Ustinya  Naumovna  inspects  the  girVs  dress. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  My !  how  you're  dolled  up — that 
dress  certainly  makes  you  look  better.  You  didn't  make  it 
yourself,  did  you  .'* 

Lipochka.  Horrible  need  I  had  of  making  it !  Why,  do 
you  think  we're  beggars.''     What  are  dressmakers  for? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Beggars,  the  idea!  Who's  saying 
anything  so  foolisli  to  you  ?  They  can  tell  from  your  house- 
keeping that  you  didn't  make  it  yourself.  However,  your 
dress  is  a  fright. 

Lipochka.  What's  the  matter  with  you  ?  Have  you 
lost  your  wits  ?  Where  are  your  eyes  ?  What  gave  you 
that  wild  notion? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  What  are  you  getting  on  your  high 
horse  for? 

Lipochka.  Nonsense !  Think  I'll  stand  such  rubbish  ? 
What,  am  I  an  uncultivated  hussy ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  What  are  you  taking  on  so  for? 
Where  did  such  a  caprice  come  from  ?  Am  I  finding  fault 
with  your  dress  ?  Why,  isn't  it  a  dress  ? — and  anybody  will 
say  it's  a  dress.  But  it  isn't  becoming  to  you;  it's  absolutely 
not  the  right  thing  for  your  style  of  beauty — blot  out  my 


274  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  m 

soul  if  I  lie.  For  you  a  gold  one  would  be  little  enough; 
let's  have  one  embroidered  with  seed-pearls.  Ah  !  there  you 
smile,  my  jewel !     You  see,  I  know  what  I'm  talking  about ! 

TiSHKA.  [Entering]  Sysoy  Psoich  wants  me  to  ask  whether 
he,  says  he,  can  come  in.  He's  out  there  with  Lazar  Eli- 
zarych. 

BoLSHov.  March !     Call  him  in  here  with  Lazar. 
TisHKA  goes  out. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Well,  now,  the  relish  isn't 
ready  for  nothing:  we'll  take  a  snack.  Now,  Ustinya  Nau- 
movna,  I  suppose  you've  been  wanting  a  drop  of  vodka  for 
a  long  time  ? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Just  the  tiling — it's  one  o'clock,  the 
admiral's  lunch-time. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Now,  Samson  Silych,  move 
out  of  that  place;  what  are  you  sitting  there  like  that 
for? 

BoLSHOv.  Wait  a  minute;  they're  coming  up.  There's 
time  enough. 

LiPOCHKA.  Mamma,  I'll  go  change  my  dress. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Run  along,  my  dear,  run 
along. 

BoLSHov.  Wait  a  minute  before  changing — there's  a 
suitor  coming. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  What  sort  of  a  suitor  can  that 
be?     Quit  your  fooling. 

BoLSHOV.  Wait  a  bit,  Lipa,  there's  a  suitor  coming. 

LiPOCHKA.  Who  is  it,  daddy  ?     Do  I  know  him  or  not  ? 

BoLSHOV.  You'll  see  him  in  a  minute;  and  then,  perhaps, 
you'll  recognize  him. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Wliat  are  you  listening  to 
him  for  .^  What  sort  of  a  clown  is  coming  ?  He's  just  talk- 
ing to  hear  himself  talk. 


SCENE  III        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         275 

BoLSHOV.  I  told  you  that  he  was  coming;  and  I  usually 
know  what  I'm  talking  about. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  If  anybody  were  actually 
coming,  then  you'd  be  talking  sense;  but  you  keep  saying 
he's  coming,  he's  coming,  but  God  knows  who  it  is  that's 
coming.     It's  always  like  tliat. 

LiPOCHKA.  Well,  in  that  case  I'll  stay,  mamma.  [She  goes 
to  the  mirror  and  looks  at  herself.     Then  to  her  father]  Daddy  ! 

BoLSHOV.  What  do  you  want  ? 

LiPOCHKA.  I'm  ashamed  to  tell  you,  daddy ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Ashamed  of  what,  you  little 
fool  ?     Speak  out  if  you  need  anything. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Shame  isn't  smoke — it  won't  eat 
out  your  eyes. 

LiPOCHKA.  No,  by  heavens,  I'm  ashamed ! 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  hide  your  face  if  you're  ashamed ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Do  you  want  a  new  hat;  is 
that  it  > 

LiPOCHKA.  There !  you  didn't  guess  it.     No,  not  a  hat. 

BoLSHOV.  Then  what  do  you  want.? 

LiPOCHKA.  To  marry  a  soldier ! 

BoLSHOV.  Just  listen  to  that ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Wake  up,  you  shameless  girl ! 
Lord  help  you ! 

LiPOCHKA.  Why — you  see,  others  marry  soldiers. 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  let  'em  marry  'em;  you  just  sit  by  the 
sea  and  wait  for  a  fair  breeze. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  And  don't  you  dare  give  me 
any  of  your  lip !     I  won't  give  you  my  mother's  blessing. 


276  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  m 


SCENE    IV 

The  same  and  Lazar,  Rispolozhensky,  and  Fominishna  in 
the  doorway. 

Rispolozhensky.  How  do  you  do,  my  dear  Samson 
Silych  !  How  do  you  do,  my  dear  Agrafena  Kondratyevna  ! 
Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  how  do  you  do ! 

BoLSHOV.  How  are  you,  old  man,  how  are  you !  Do  us 
the  favor  to  sit  down.     You  sit  down,  too,  Lazar ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Won't  you  have  a  snack? 
I  have  a  reUsh  all  ready  for  you. 

Rispolozhensky.  Why  shouldn't  I,  dear  lady  ?  I'd  just 
like  a  thimbleful  of  something  now. 

BoLSHOV.  Let's  all  go  in  together  pretty  soon;  but  now, 
meanwhile,  we  can  have  a  little  talk. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Why  not  have  a  little  talk  ?  D'you 
know,  my  jewels,  I  heard — it  must  have  been  printed  in  the 
newspaper,  whether  it's  true  or  not — that  a  second  Bona- 
parte has  been  born,  and  it  may  be,  my  jewels 

BoLSHOV.  Bonaparte's  all  right,  but  we'll  trust  most  of 
all  in  the  mercy  of  God;   it's  not  a  question  of  that  now. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  What  is  it  a  question  of,  my  pearl  ? 

BoLSHOV.  Why,  about  the  fact  that  our  years  are  approach- 
ing their  decline;  our  health  also  is  failing  every  minute, 
and  the  Creator  alone  can  foresee  what  is  ahead.  So  we  have 
proposed,  while  we're  still  living,  to  give  in  marriage  our  only 
daughter;  and  in  regard  to  her  settlement  we  may  hope 
also  that  she'll  not  bring  into  ill  repute  our  resources  and 
origin;  above  all,  in  other  people's  eyes. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Just  hear  how  sweetly  he  tells  that, 
the  jewel ! 

BoLSHOV.  And  since  now  our  daughter  is  here  in  person. 


SCENE  IV        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         277 

and  in  view  of  the  fact  that  we  are  convinced  of  the  honor- 
able conduct  and  the  sufficient  means  of  our  future  son-in- 
law,  which  for  us  is  a  matter  of  extreme  concern,  in  consid- 
eration of  God's  blessing,  we  hereby  designate  him  in  the 
presence  of  these  witnesses.     Lipa,  come  here. 

LiPOCHKA.  What  do  you  want,  daddy.'* 

BoLSHOV.  Come  here  to  me.  I  shan't  eat  you,  never  fear. 
Well,  now,  Lazar,  toddle  up ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Been  ready  a  long  time,  sir ! 

BoLSHOV.  Now,  Lipa,  give  me  your  hand. 

LiPOCHKA.  How !  Wliat  nonsense  is  this .''  Where  did 
you  get  this  rubbish.^ 

BoLSHOV.  Look  out  that  I  don't  have  to  force  you ! 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Now  you're  catching  it,  young  lady  ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Lord !  What  on  earth  is 
this.? 

LiPOCHKA.  I  don't  want  to !  I  don't  want  to !  I  won't 
marry  anything  so  disgusting ! 

FoMiNisHNA.  The  power  of  the  cross  be  with  us ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Evidently,  daddy,  it's  not  for  me  to  see 
happiness  in  this  world  !  Evidently,  sir,  it  can't  be  as  you 
would  wish ! 

BoLSHOV.  [Seizes  Lipochka  violently  by  the  arm;  takes 
Lazar's  hand]  Why  can't  it,  if  I  want  it  to  be?  What  am 
I  your  father  for,  if  not  to  command  you .''  Have  I  fed  her 
for  nothing.'' 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  What're  you  doing  !  What're 
you  doing  !     Recollect  yourself  ! 

Bolshov.  Stay  on  your  own  side  of  the  fence !  This  is 
none  of  your  business !  Well,  Lipa !  Here's  your  future 
husband  !  I  ask  you  to  love  and  cherish  him  !  Sit  down 
side  by  side  and  talk  nice;  and  then  we'll  have  a  fine  dinner 
and  set  about  the  wedding. 


278  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  in 

LiPOCHKA.  What !  Do  you  think  I  want  to  sit  down  with 
that  booby  !     What  nonsense  ! 

BoLSHOV.  If  you  won't  sit  down,  I'll  sit  you  down,  and 
put  an  end  to  your  monkey-business ! 

LiPOCHKA.  Who  ever  heard  of  educated  young  ladies  be- 
ing married  off  to  their  employees ! 

BoLSHOV.  Better  shut  up !  If  I  say  so,  you'll  marry  the 
porter.  [Silence, 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Say,  now,  Agrafena  Kondratyevna, 
if  that  isn't  a  pity  ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  I  myself,  the  mother,  am  as 
much  in  the  dark  as  a  clothes-closet.  And  I  can't  under- 
stand what  in  the  world  has  caused  this ! 

FoMiNiSHNA.  Lord  !  I'm  past  sixty,  and  how  many  wed- 
dings I've  seen;  but  I've  never  seen  anything  so  shameful 
as  this. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  What  do  you  mean,  you  mur- 
derers;   do  you  want  to  dishonor  the  girl.'' 

BoLSHOv.  Yes,  much  I  have  to  listen  to  your  high-fahitin' 
talk.  I've  decided  to  marry  my  daughter  to  a  clerk,  and 
I'll  have  my  way,  and  don't  you  dare  argue;  I  don't  give  a 
hang  for  anybody.  Come  now,  we'll  go  take  a  snack;  but 
just  let  them  kid  each  other,  and  maybe  they'll  make  it  up 
somehow  or  other. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  Let's  go,  Samson  Silych,  and  you  and 
I,  for  company,  '11  just  take  a  thimbleful.  Yes,  yes,  Agra- 
fena Kondratyevna,  that's  the  first  duty,  that  children 
should  obey  their  parents.  We  didn't  start  that  custom, 
and  we  shan't  see  the  last  of  it. 

Theu  all  rise  and  go  out  except  Lipochka,  Podkhal- 
YuziN,  and  Agrafena  Kondratyevna. 

Lipochka.  Mamma,  what  does  this  mean .''  Does  he  want 
to  make  a  cook  of  me  ?  [She  weeps. 


SCENE  V         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         279 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Mamma,  ma'am !  Such  a  son-in-law  as 
will  respect  you  and,  naturally,  make  your  old  age  happy, 
aside  from  me  you  won't  find,  ma'am. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  How  are  you  going  to  do 
that,  my  dear  ? 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Mamma,  ma'am !  God  has  made  me  as- 
pire so  high,  ma'am  for  this  reason,  ma'am,  because  the  other 
fellow,  mamma,  will  turn  j^ou  down  flat,  ma'am;  but  I,  till 
I  land  in  my  coffin  [weeps],  must  have  feeling,  ma'am ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Ah,  saints  alive !  But  how 
can  this  be.'* 

BoLSHOV.  [Through  the  door]  Wife,  come  here! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Coming,  ray  dear,  coming ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Mamma,  you  remember  the  word  I  said 
just  now ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna  goes  out. 

SCENE    V 

LiPOCHKA  and  Podkhalyuzin 
Silence 

Podkhalyuzin.  Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  ma'am !  Olim- 
piada  Samsonovna !  I  suppose  you  abominate  me  ?  Say 
only  one  word,  ma'am !     Just  let  me  kiss  your  little  hand ! 

LiPOCHKA.  You  blockhead,  you  ignorant  lout ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  But  why,  Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  do  you 
want  to  insult  me,  ma'am? 

LiPOCHKA.  I'll  tell  you  once,  now  and  forever,  that  I 
won't  marry  you,  and  I  won't ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  That's  just  as  you  please,  ma'am !  Love 
can't  be  forced.  Only  here's  what  I  want  to  announce  to 
you,  ma'am 

LiPOCHKA.  I  won't  listen  to  you;   go  away  from  me!     As 


280  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  m 

if  you  were  an  educated  gentleman  !  You  see  that  I  wouldn't 
marry  you  for  anything  in  the  world — you  ought  to  break 
off  yourself ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Now,  Olluipiada  Samsonovna,  you  were 
pleased  to  say  "break  off."  Only,  if  I  should  break  off, 
what  would  happen  then,  ma'am? 

LiPOCHKA.  Why,  the  thing  that  would  happen  would  be 
that  I'd  marry  an  aristocrat. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  An  aristocrat,  ma'am !  But  an  aristo- 
crat won't  take  you  without  a  dowry ! 

LiPOCHKA.  What  do  you  mean,  without  dowry  ?  What 
are  you  talking  about?  Just  take  a  look  and  see  what  kind 
of  a  dowry  I  have;    it  fairly  hits  you  in  the  face! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Tliose  dish-rags,  ma'am  ?  A  nobleman 
won't  take  dish-rags.     A  nobleman  wants  it  in  cash,  ma'am. 

LiPOCHKA.  What  of  it  ?     Dad  will  give  cash  ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  All  right,  if  he  will,  ma'am !  But  what 
if  he  hasn't  any  to  give  ?  You  don't  know  about  your  papa's 
affairs,  but  I  know  'em  mighty  well;  your  papa's  a  bank- 
rupt, ma'am. 

LiPOCHKA.  What  do  you  mean,  bankrupt?  And  the 
house  and  shops  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  The  house  and  shops— are  mine,  ma'am ! 

LiPOCHKA.  Yours  !  Get  out !  Are  you  trjing  to  make  a 
fool  of  me?     Look  for  a  bigger  goose  than  I  am. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  But  I  have  here  some  legal  documents. 

[lie  produces  them. 

LiPOCHKA.  So  you  bought  tliem  of  dad  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  I  did,  ma'am  ! 

LiPOCHKA.  Where'd  you  get  the  money  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Money !  Glory  to  God,  I  have  more 
money  than  any  nobleman. 

LiPOCHKA.  What   in   the  world   are   they   doing   to   me? 


SCENE  V         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         281 

They've  been  bringing  me  up  all  these  years,  and  then  go 
bankrupt !  [Silence. 

PoDKHALYuziN.  Now  suppose,  Olimpiada  Samsonovna, 
that  you  married  a  nobleman — what  will  that  ever  amount 
to,  ma'am  ?  Only  the  glory  of  being  a  lady,  but  not  the 
least  pleasure,  ma'am.  Please  consider:  ladies  themselves 
often  go  to  the  market  on  foot,  ma'am.  And  if  they  do 
drive  out  anywhere,  then  it's  only  the  glory  of  having  four 
horses;  but  the  whole  team  ain't  worth  one  merchant's 
horse.  By  heaven,  it  ain't,  ma'am !  And  they  don't  dress 
so  blamed  superbly  either,  ma'am !  But  if,  Olimpiada  Sam- 
sonovna, you  should  marry  me,  ma'am — here's  the  first  word : 
you'll  wear  silk  gowns  even  at  home,  and  visiting,  and  to  the 
theatre,  ma'am — and  we  shan't  dress  you  in  anything  but 
velvets.  In  respect  to  hats  and  cloaks — we  won't  care  what's 
in  style  with  the  nobility,  but  we'll  furnish  you  the  finest 
ever !  We'll  get  horses  from  the  Orlov  stud.  [Silence]  If 
you  have  doubts  on  the  question  of  my  looks,  then  that's 
just  as  you  like,  ma'am;  I'll  put  on  a  dress  coat,  and  trim 
my  beard  or  cut  it  off,  according  to  the  fashion,  ma'am; 
that's  all  one  to  me,  ma'am. 

LiPOCHKA.  You  all  talk  that  way  before  the  wedding; 
but  afterwards  you  cheat  us. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  May  I  die  on  the  spot,  Olimpiada  Sam- 
sonovna !  Damnation  blast  me  if  I  lie !  Why  should  I, 
Olimpiada  Samsonovna?  D'you  think  we'll  live  in  a  house 
like  this?  We'll  buy  one  in  the  Karetny,  ma'am;  and  how 
we'll  decorate  it !  We'll  have  birds  of  paradise  on  the  ceil- 
ings, sirens,  various  Coopids^ — people'U  pay  good  money  just 
to  look  at  it. 

LiPOCHKA.  They  don't  paint  Coopids  any  more  nowa- 
days. 

'  These  are  not  the  only  words  that  Podkhalyuziu  mispronounces;  Olimpiada  is 
another. 


282  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  iii 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Then  we'll  let  'em  paint  bokays.  [Silence] 
If  you'd  only  agree  on  your  side,  then  I  don't  want  anything 
more  in  life.  [Silence]  How  unfortunate  I  am,  anyhow,  that 
I  can't  say  nice  comjjliments. 

LiPOCHKA.  Why  don't  you  talk  French,  Lazar  Elizarych? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Because  there  was  no  reason  why  I  should. 
[Silence]  Make  me  happy,  Olimpiada  Samsonovna;  grant 
me  that  blessing,  ma'am.  [Silence]  Just  tell  me  to  kneel  to 
you. 

LiPOCHKA.  Well,  do  it !  [Podkhalyuzin  kneels]  What  a 
horrid  waistcoat  you  have  on ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN".  I'll  give  this  one  to  Tishka,  ma'am,  and 
I'll  get  myself  one  on  the  Kuznetsky  Bridge,  only  don't  ruin 
me !  [Silence]  Well,  Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  ma'am  ? 

LiPOCHKA.  Let  me  think. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Think  about  what,  ma'am? 

LiPOCHKA.  How  can  I  help  thinking.'* 

Podkhalyuzin.  Why,  you  don't  need  to  think ! 

LiPOCHKA.  I'll  tell  you  what,  Lazar  Elizarych ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  What're  your  orders,  ma'am.? 

LiPOCHKA.  Carry  me  off  on  the  quiet. 

Podkhalyuzin.  But  why  on  the  quiet,  ma'am,  when  your 
papa  and  mamma  are  so  willing.'' 

LiPOCHKA.  That's  quite  the  thing  to  do.  Well,  if  you 
don't  want  to  carry  me  oflF,  why,  let  it  go  as  it  is. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  just  let  me  kiss 
your  little  hand  !  [He  kisses  it;  then  he  jumps  up  and  runs 
to  the  door]  Daddy,  sir  ! 

LiPOCHKA.  Lazar  Elizarych !  Lazar  Elizarych !  Come 
here ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  What  do  you  want,  ma'am  ? 

LiPOCHKA.  Oh,  if  you  knew,  Lazar  Elizarych,  what  my 
life  here  is  like !     Mamma  says  one  thing  one  day,  and  an- 


SCENE  VI        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         283 

other  the  next;  papa,  when  he  isn't  drunk,  has  nothing  to 
say;  but  when  he's  drunk  he's  apt  to  beat  you  at  any  mo- 
ment. How's  a  cultivated  young  lady  going  to  endure  such 
a  life  ?  Now,  if  I  could  marry  a  nobleman,  I'd  go  out  of  this 
house,  and  could  forget  about  all  that.  But  now  everything 
will  go  on  as  before. 

PoDKHALYUzix.  No,  ma'am,  Olimpiada  Samsonovna;  it 
won't  be  that  way !  Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  as  soon  as 
we've  celebrated  the  wedding,  we'll  move  into  our  own  house, 
ma'am.  And  then  we  won't  let  'em  boss  us.  No,  here's 
an  end  to  all  that,  ma'am !  That'll  do  for  them — they  ran 
things  in  their  day,  now  it's  our  turn. 

LiPOCHKA.  Just  look  here,  Lazar  Elizarych,  we  shall  live 
by  ourselves  at  our  house,  and  they  by  themselves  at  their 
house.  We'll  do  everything  fashionably,  and  they,  just  as 
they  please. 

PoDKHALYuziN.  That's  the  idea,  ma'am. 

LiPOCHKA.  Well,  call  papa  now. 

[She  rises  and  jrrmks  before  the  mirror. 

PoDKHALYuziN.  Papa !     Papa  !     Sir !     Mamma ! 

SCENE    VI 

The  same,  Bolshov,  and  Agrafena  Kondratyevna 

PODKHALYUZIN.  [Goes  to  vfieet  Samson  Silych  and  throws 
his  arms  about  him  in  an  embrace]  Olimpiada  Samsonovna 
has  agreed,  sir ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  I'm  coming,  my  dears,  I'm 
coming ! 

Bolshov.  Well,  that's  talking  !  Just  the  thing !  I  know 
what  I'm  doing;   it's  not  for  you  to  teach  me. 

PODKHALYUZIN.  [To  Agrafena  Kondratyevna]  Mamma, 
ma'am  !     Let  me  kiss  your  hand  ! 


284  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  m 

Agrafena  KoNDRATYE\TsrA.  Kiss  away,  my  dear;  they're 
both  clean.  Ah,  you  l)lc.sse<I  child,  has  it  been  long  since 
you  decided  ?  Ah  ?  Good  heavens !  What's  this  ?  I  ab- 
solutely didn't  know  how  to  decide  this  matter.  Oh,  my 
own  little  darling,  you ! 

LiPOCHKA.  Mamma,  I  positively  didn't  know  that  Lazar 
Elizarych  was  such  a  well-educated  gentleman  !  But  now 
I  see  at  once  that  he's  infinitelj'  more  respectful  than  the 
others. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Well,  well,  well,  you  little 
goose !  As  if  your  father  would  wish  you  any  harm !  Ah, 
mamma's  little  dove  !  What  a  little  story,  eh  'i  Oh,  my  holy 
saints !  What  in  the  world  is  this  ?  Fominishna !  Fomi- 
nishna ! 

Fominishna.  Coming,  coming,  my  dear,  coming ! 

[»S7je  comes  in. 

BoLSHOV.  Stop,  you  gabbler  !  Now  you  two  just  sit  down 
side  by  side,  and  we'll  have  a  look  at  you.  Fominishna, 
bring  up  a  little  bottle  of  fizz. 

PoDKHALYUZiN  and  LiPOCHKA  sit  down. 

Fominishna.  Right  away,  my  dear,  right  away ! 

[She  goes  out. 

SCENE    VII 

The  same,  Ustinya  Naumovna,  and  Rispolozhensky 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Congratulate  the  bride  and 
groom  to  be,  Ustinya  Naumovna !  God  has  brought  us  to 
a  ripe  old  age;  we  have  lived  to  see  happiness ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  What  have  I  got  to  congratulate 
you  with,  my  jewels.''  My  mouth's  too  dry  to  sing  your 
praises. 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  now,  we'll  wet  your  whistle. 


SCENE  VII       IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         2S5 


SCENE    VIII 

The  same,  Fominishna,  and  Tishka,  who  is  bringing  toine  on 
a  tray. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Aha!  here's  a  matter  of  a  different 
sort.  Well,  God  grant  you  live  long,  keep  young,  grow  fat, 
and  be  rich !  [SJie  drinks]  It's  bitter,  my  jewels !  [Lipochka 
and  Lazar  kiss]  Ah  !  that  sweetens  it ! 

BoLSHOV.  Just  let  me  drink  their  health.  [He  takes  the 
glass;  Lipochka  and  Lazar  stand  up]  Live  as  you  think 
best — you're  reasonable  beings.  But  so  that  you  won't  find 
life  a  bore,  the  house  and  shops  go  to  you,  Lazar,  in  place  of 
dowry,  and  I'll  throw  in  some  ready  cash. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Many  thanks,  daddy;  I'm  well  satisfied 
with  what  you've  done  for  me  as  it  is. 

BoLSHOV.  Nothing  to  thank  me  for !  They're  my  own 
goods — I  made  'em  myself.  I  give  'em  to  whomever  I  please. 
Pour  me  another !  [Tishka  pours  another  glass]  But  what's 
the  good  of  talking !  Kindness  is  no  crime !  Take  every- 
thing, only  feed  me  and  the  old  woman,  and  pay  off  the 
creditors  at  ten  kopeks  on  the  ruble. 

PoDKHALYuziN.  Why,  daddy,  that's  not  worth  talking 
about,  sir !  Don't  I  know  what  feeling  is .''  It's  a  family 
affair — we'll  settle  it  ourselves. 

BoLSHOV.  I  tell  you,  take  it  all,  and  there's  an  end  to  it ! 
And  nobody  can  boss  me !  Only  pay  my  creditors.  Will 
you  pay  'em .'' 

PoDKHALYUziN.  If  vou  please,  dad,  that's  my  first  duty, 
sir. 

BoLSHOv.  Only  you  look  out — ^don't  give  'em  much.  As 
it  is,  I  suppose  you'll  be  fool  enough  to  pay  the  whole 
debt. 


IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  m 

PoDKHALYUZiN,  Oh,  We'll  settle  it  later,  daddy,  somehow. 
If  you  please,  it's  a  family  affair. 

BoLSHOV.  Come,  all  right!  Don't  you  give  'em  more 
than  ten  kopeks.  That'll  do  for  them.  Well,  kiss  each 
other ! 

LiPOCHKA  and  Lazar  do  so. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Ah,  my  little  doves!  How 
in  the  world  did  it  happen  !     I  declare  I've  quite  lost  my  head. 

Ustinta  Naumovna. 

"Whoever  heard  or  saw  such  things.'' 
The  elephant's  learning  to  fly  with  wings; 
The  hen  laid  a  door-knob  instead  of  an  egg; 
And  piggy  is  dancing  a  jig  on  a  keg  !" 

She  'pours  out  urine  and  (joes  up  to  Rispolozhensky; 
RispOLOZHENSKY  boivs  ami  declines  the  loine. 

BoLSHOV.  Drink  to  their  happiness,  Sysoy  Psoich. 

Rispolozhensky.  I  can't,  Samson  Silych — it  turns  my 
stomach ! 

BoLSHOv.  Go  along  with  you  !     Drink  to  their  happiness. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  He's  always  showing  off ! 

Rispolozhensky.  It  turns  my  stomach,  Samson  Silych ! 
By  heaven,  it  does !  I'll  just  take  a  thimbleful  of  vodka. 
But  my  nature  won't  stand  the  other.  I  have  such  a  weak 
constitution. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Bah  !  you  long-necked  goose  !  Non- 
sense— much  your  nature  won't  stand  it !  Give  it  here.  I'll 
pour  it  down  his  collar  if  he  won't  drink  it ! 

Rispolozhensky.  No  fair,  Ustinya  Naumovna !  That 
ain't  nice  for  a  lady  to  do.  Samson  Silych,  I  can't,  sir ! 
Would  I  have  refused  it .''  He  !  he  !  he  !  Wliat  kind  of  a 
blockhead  am  I,  that  I  should  do  anything  so  rude?  I've 
seen  high  society,  I  know  how  to  live.     Now,  I  never  refuse 


SCENE  VIII     IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         287 

vodka;  if  you  don't  mind,  I'll  just  take  a  thimbleful!  But 
this  I  simplj^  can't  drink — it  turns  my  stomach.  Samson 
Silych,  don't  you  allow  all  this  disorderly  conduct;  it's  easy 
to  insult  a  man,  but  it  ain't  nice. 

BoLSHOV.  Give  it  to  him  hot  and  heavy,  Ustinya  Nau- 
movna,  hot  and  heavy  ! 

RisPOLozHENSKY  rnns  away  from  her. 
Ustinya  Naumovna.  [Placing  the  wine  on  the  table]  You 
shan't  get  away  from  me,  you  old  son  of  a  sea-cook ! 

[She  pushes  him  into  a  corner  and  seizes  him  by  the  collar. 
RisPOLozHENSKY.  Police ! 
All  burst  out  laughing. 


ACT    IV 

A  richly  furnished  chamber  in  the  house  of  Podkhalyuzin 

SCENE    I 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna  is  sitting  luxuriouslif  vrar  the  win- 
dow; she  xoears  a  silk  waist,  and  a  bonnet  of  the  latest 
fashion.  Podkhalyuzin,  in  a  stylish  frock  coat,  stands 
before  the  mirror.  Behind  him  Tishka  is  adjusting  his 
master  s  clothes,  and  adding  the  finishing  touches. 

Tishka.  There  now,  it  fits  you  to  a  T ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  Well,  Tishka,  do  I  look  like  a  Frenchman .'' 
Ah  !     Step  away  and  look  at  me ! 

Tishka.  Like  as  two  peas. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Go  along,  you  blockhead  !  Now  you  just 
look  at  me.  [He  walks  about  the  room]  There  now,  Olimpiada 
Samsonovna !  And  you  wanted  to  marry  an  officer,  ma'am  ! 
Ain't  I  a  sport,  though.'*  I  picked  the  smartest  coat  I  could 
find  and  put  it  on. 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  But  you  don't  know  how  to 
dance,  Lazar  Elizarych. 

Podkhalyuzin.  What  of  it — won't  I  learn  though,  and 
the  raggiest  ever !  In  the  winter  we're  going  to  attend  the 
Merchants'  Assemblies.  You  just  watch  us,  ma'am !  I'm 
going  to  dance  the  polka. 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Now,  Lazar  Elizarych,  you  buy 
that  carriage  we  saw  at  Arbatsky's. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Of  course,  Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  ma'am  ! 
Of  course,  by  all  means ! 


SCENE  I  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         289 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  They've  brought  me  a  new 
cloak;   you  and  I  ought  to  go  Friday  to  Sokohiiki. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Of  course,  most  certainly  we'll  go,  m.a'am; 
and  we'll  drive  in  the  park  on  Sundays.  You  see  our  car- 
riage is  worth  a  thousand  rubles,  and  the  horses  a  thousand, 
and  the  harness  mounted  with  silver — just  let  'em  look ! 
Tishka !  My  pipe.  [Tishka  goes  out.  Podkhalyuzin  sits 
down  beside  Olimpiada  Samsonovna]  Just  so,  ma'am,  Olim- 
piada Samsonovna;  you  just  let  'em  watch  us. 

[silence. 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Well,  why  don't  you  kiss  me, 
Lazar  Elizarych  ? 

Podkhalyuzin.  Why,  sure !  Permit  me,  ma'am !  With 
great  pleasure  !  If  you  please,  your  little  hand,  ma'am  !  [He 
kisses  it.  Silence]  Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  say  something 
to  me  in  the  French  dialect,  ma'am ! 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  What  shall  I  say  to  you .'' 

Podkhalyuzin.  Oh,  say  anything — any  little  thing,  ma'am. 
It's  all  the  same  to  me,  ma'am ! 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Kom  voo  zet  zholi! 

Podkhalyuzin.  What  does  that  mean,  ma'am  ? 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  How  nice  you  are ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  [Jumping  up  from   his  chair]  Aha !   now 
here's  a  wife  for  you,  ma'am !     Hooray,  Olimpiada  Samson- 
ovna !     You've  treated  me  fine !     Your  little  hand,  please ! 
Enter  Tishka  ivith  the  pipe. 

Tishka.  Ustinya  Naumovna  has  come. 

Podkhalyuzin.  What  the  devil  is  she  here  for ! 
Tishka  goes  out. 


290  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  iv 

SCENE    II 

The  same  and  Ustinya  Naumovna 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  How  are  you  managing  to  live,  my 
jewels  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Thanks  to  your  prayers,  Ustinya  Nau- 
movna, thanks  to  your  prayers. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  [Kissing  Olimpiada  Samsonovna] 
Why,  I  believe  you've  grown  better  looking,  and  have  filled 
out  a  bit ! 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Bah,  what  nonsense  you're  chat- 
tering, Ustinya  Naumovna !  Now,  what  struck  you  to  come 
here  ? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Wliat  nonsense,  my  jewel !  Here's 
what's  up.  Whether  you  like  it  or  not,  you  can't  help  it. — 
If  you  like  to  slide  down-lull  you've  got  to  pull  up  your 
sled. — Now,  why  have  you  forgotten  me  completely,  my 
jewels.?  Or  haven't  you  had  a  chance  yet  to  look  about 
you  ?     I  suppose  you're  all  the  time  billing  and  cooing. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  We  have  that  failing,  Ustinya  Naumovna; 
we  have  it. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Come,  come  now:  just  see  what  a 
nice  sweetheart  I  got  for  you. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  We're  well  satisfied,  Ustinya  Naumovna; 
we're  well  satisfied. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  How  could  you  be  dissatisfied,  my 
ruby  .'*  What's  the  matter  with  you !  I  suppose  you're  all 
the  time  bustling  around  over  new  clothes,  now.  Have  you 
laid  in  a  stock  of  stylish  things  yet.^* 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Not  much  so  far,  and  that  mostly 
because  the  new  stuffs  have  just  come  in. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Naturally,  my  pearl,  you  can't  help 


SCENE  n         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         291 

it;  let  'em  be  of  poor  goods,  so  long's  they're  blue!  But 
what  kind  of  dresses  did  you  order  most  of,  woollens  or  silks  ? 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  All  sorts — both  woollens  and 
silks;  not  long  ago  I  had  a  crape  made  with  gold  trim- 
mings. 

UsTiNYA  NAUMO\TsrA.  How  mucli  have  you,  all-in-all, 
my  jewel  ? 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Here,  count:  my  wedding-dress 
of  blond  lace  over  a  satin  slip;  and  three  velvets — that  makes 
four;  two  gauze  and  a  crape  embroidered  with  gold — that's 
seven;  three  satin,  and  three  grosgrain — that's  thirteen; 
gros  de  Naples  and  gros  d'Afrique,  seven — that's  twenty; 
three  marceline,  two  mousseline  de  ligne,  two  Chine  royale — 
how  many's  that.^ — three  and  four's  seven,  and  twenty — 
twenty-seven;  four  crape  Rachel — that's  thirty-one.  Then 
there  are  muslins,  bouffe  mousseline  and  calico,  about  twenty, 
and  then  waists  and  morning  jackets — ^about  nine  or  ten. 
And  then  I've  just  had  one  made  of  Persian  stuff. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Lord  help  you,  what  heaps  you've 
got !  But  you  go  and  pick  out  for  me  the  largest  of  the 
gros  d'Afrique  ones. 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  I  won't  give  you  a  gros  d'Afrique, 
I  have  only  three  myself;  besides,  it  wouldn't  suit  your 
figure:  now,  if  you  want  to,  you  can  take  a  crape  Rachel. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  What  in  time  do  I  want  with  a 
tripe  Rachel.  Evidently  there's  nothing  to  be  done  with 
you;   I'll  be  satisfied  with  a  satin  one,  and  let  it  go  at  that. 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Well,  and  the  satin,  too — it's 
not  quite  the  thing,  cut  ballroom  style,  very  low — you 
understand  ?  But  I'll  look  up  a  crape  Rachel  jacket;  we'll 
let  out  the  tucks,  and  it'll  fit  you  like  the  paper  on  the  wall. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Well,  bring  on  your  tripe  Rachel! 
You  win,  my  ruby;  go  open  the  clothes  closet. 


IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  iv 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Right  away;  wait  just  a  minute. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  I'll  wait,  my  jewel,  I'll  wait.  Be- 
sides, I  have  to  have  a  little  talk  with  your  husband.  [Olim- 
piada Samsonovna  goes  out]  What's  this,  my  jewel,  have 
you  entirely  forgotten  about  your  promise.'' 

PoDKHALYUZlN.  How  could  I  forget,  ma'am  ?  I  remem- 
ber. [He  takes  out  Jm  pochetbook  and  gives  her  a  note. 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Why,  what's  this,  my  diamond? 

PoDKHALYUziN.  One  hundred  rubles,  ma'am ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Only  one  hundred.'^  Why,  you 
promised  me  fifteen  hundred  ! 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Wha — at,  ma'am? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  You  promised  me  fifteen  hundred ! 

PODKHALYUZIN.  Ain't  that  a  bit  steep?  Won't  you  be 
living  too  high  ? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  What's  this,  you  barnyard  cockerel; 
are  you  trying  to  joke  with  me,  man  ?  I'm  a  mighty  cocky 
lady  myself ! 

PODKHALYUZIN.  But  why  should  I  give  you  money? 
I'd  do  it  if  there  were  any  occasion  for  it. 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Whether  for  something  or  for  noth- 
ing, give  it  here — you  promised  it  yourself ! 

PODKHALYUZIN.  What  if  I  did  promise !  I  promised  to 
jump  from  the  Tower  of  Ivan  the  Great,  provided  I  married 
Olimpiada  Samsonovna;  should  I  jump? 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Do  you  think  I  won't  have  the  law 
on  you  ?  Much  I  care  that  you're  a  merchant  of  the  second 
guild;  I'm  in  the  fourteenth  class  myself,  and  even  if  that 
ain't  much,  I'm  an  official's  wife  all  the  same. 
'  Podkhalyuzin.  You  may  be  a  general's  wife — it's  all 
the  same  to  me;  I  won't  have  anything  to  do  with  you  ! 
And  there's  an  end  to  it ! 


SCENE  III        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  293 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  You  lie,  it  ain't!  You  promised 
me  a  sable  cloak. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  What,  ma'am? 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  A  sable  cloak !  Have  you  grown 
deaf,  maybe.'* 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Sable,  ma'am  !     He,  he,  he ! 

UsTiNYA  Naumovna.  Yes,  sable  !  What  are  you  laughing 
and  stretching  your  mouth  at  ? 

PoDKHALYuziN.  You  haven't  gone  out  for  a  stroll  with 
your  mug  in  a  sable  cloak'  yet,  have  you? 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna  brings  in  a  dress  and  hands 
it  to  Ustinya  Naxjmovna. 

SCENE    III 

The  same  and  Olimpiada  Samsonovna 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  What  in  the  world  is  the  matter 
with  you;  do  you  want  to  rob  me,  maybe? 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Rob  you,  nothing !  You  just  go  to  the 
devil,  and  be  done  with  you ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  Are  you  going  to  turn  me  out  ? 
And  I,  senseless  idiot,  agreed  to  work  for  you :  I  can  see  now 
your  vulgar  blood ! 

PoDKHALYUziN.  What,  ma'am !     Speak,  if  you  please ! 

Ustinya  Naumovna.  When  it  comes  to  that,  I  don't  care 
to  look  at  you !  Not  for  any  amount  of  money  on  earth 
will  I  agree  to  associate  with  you !  I'll  go  twenty  miles  out 
of  my  way,  but  I  won't  go  by  j^ou  !  I'll  sooner  shut  my  eyes 
and  bump  into  a  horse,  than  stand  and  look  at  your  dirty 
den !  Even  if  I  want  to  spit,  I'll  never  set  foot  in  this  street 
again !  Break  me  in  ten  pieces  if  I  lie !  You  can  go  to  the 
infernal  jim-jams  if  you  ever  see  me  here  again ! 

'  Russian  fur  cloaks,  it  may  be  useful  to  remember,  have  broad  collars  that  can 
be  turned  up  to  protect  the  face. 


^204:  ITS    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  iv 

PoDKHALYUZix.  Easv  now.  aunty,  easy ! 

UsTixvA  Xaumovxa.  I'll  show  you  up,  my  jewels:  you'll 
find  out !  Ill  give  you  such  a  rep  in  Moscow  that  you  won't 
dare  show  your  face  in  pubhc ! — Oh !  I'm  a  fool,  a  fool 
to  have  anything  to  do  with  such  a  person !  And  I,  a  lady 
of  rank  and  position  ! — Fah,  fall,  fah  !  [She  goes  out. 

PoDKHALYUzix.  Well,  the  blue-l)looded  lady  flew  off  the 
handle  !  Oh.  Lord,  what  an  official  she  is  !  There's  a  prov- 
erb that  says:  "The  thunderbolt  strikes,  not  from  the 
clouds,  but  from  the  dung-heap."  Good  Lord  I  Just  look 
at  her;    what  a  lady  ! 

Olimpiada  S-Oisoxo\'xa.  Bright  idea  of  yours,  Lazar 
Elizarych.  ever  to  have  anytliing  to  do  with  her ! 

PoDKHALYUZix.  Really,  a  very  absurd  woman. 

Olimpiada  S.\iisoxovxA.  [Glancing  out  of  the  icindow]  I 
believe  they've  let  daddy  out  of  the  pen;  go  see,  Lazar 
Elizarych. 

PoDKHALYUZix.  ^Yell.  uo,  ma'am:  they  won't  let  daddy 
out  of  the  pen  soon,  either;  most  likely  they  ordered  him  to 
the  meeting  of  the  creditors,  and  then  he  got  leave  to  come 
home.  Mamma,  ma'am  !  Agrafena  Kondratyevna  !  Daddy's 
coming,  ma'am ! 


SCENE    IV 
The  same,  Bolshov,  and  Agr.a.fexa  Koxdratte^'xa 

Agr.\fexa  Koxdratye\-xa.  Where  is  he.^  Where  is  he? 
My  own  children,   my  little  doves !     [Kisses  are  exchanged. 

PoDKHALYtrzix.  Daddv,  how  do  you  do,  our  respects ! 

Agrafexa  Koxdratye\'xa.  My  little  dove,  Samson  Silych, 
my  treasure  !     You've  left  me  an  orphan  in  my  old  age  ! 

Bolshov.  That'll  do,  wife;  stop! 


SCENE  IV        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         295 

Olimpiada  Sajvisoxovna.  What's  the  matter  with  you, 
ma?  you're  cr\ing  over  him  as  if  he  were  dead!  God  only 
knows  what's  happened. 

BoLSHOV.  That's  just  it,  daughter;  God  only  knows; 
but  all  the  same  your  father's  in  jail. 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Why,  daddy,  there  are  better 
people  than  you  and  me  there,  too. 

BoLSHOV.  There  are,  that's  so !  But  how  does  it  feel 
to  be  there  .-^  How'd  you  like  to  go  through  the  street  with 
a  soldier  ?  Oh,  daughter !  You  see  they've  known  me 
here  in  this  city  for  forty  years;  for  forty  years  they've  all 
bowed  to  me  down  to  their  belts,  but  now  the  street  brats 
point  their  fingers  at  me. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  You  haven't  any  color  at  all, 
my  darling !     You  look  like  a  ghost. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Ah,  daddy,  God  is  merciful !  When  the 
rough  places  are  smoothed  over  it'll  all  be  pleasant  again. 
Well,  daddy,  what  do  the  creditors  say  ? 

BoLSHov.  Here's  what:  they've  agreed  on  the  terms. 
"What's  the  use,"  they  saj',  "of  dragging  it  out.'  Maybe 
it'll  do  good,  maybe  it  won't;  but  just  give  something  in 
cash,  and  deuce  take  you!" 

PoDKHALYUziN.  Why  not  give  'em  something,  sir !  By 
all  means  do,  sir !     But  do  they  ask  much,  daddy  ? 

BoLSHOV.  They  ask  twenty-five  kopeks. 

PoDKHALYTJZiN.  That's  a  good  deal,  daddy ! 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  man,  I  know  myself  that  it's  a  good  deal; 
but  what's  to  be  done  ?     They  won't  take  less. 

PoDKHALYUziN.  If  they'd  take  ten  kopeks,  then  it'd  be 
all  right  sir.  Seven  and  a  half  for  satisfaction,  and  two  and 
a  half  for  the  expenses  of  the  meeting. 

BoLSHOV.  That's  the  way  I  talked;  but  they  won't  listen 
to  it. 


296  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  iv 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  They  carry  it  blamed  high  !  But  won't 
they  take  eight  kopeks  in  five  years  ? 

BoLSHOv.  What's  the  use,  Lazar,  we'll  have  to  give 
twenty-five;  that's  what  we  proposed  at  first. 

PoDKHALYUziN.  But  how,  daddy !  You  yourself  used  to 
say  not  to  give  more  than  ten  kopeks,  sir.  Just  consider 
yourself:  at  the  rate  of  twenty-five  kopeks,  that's  a  lot  of 
money.  Daddy,  wouldn't  you  like  to  take  a  snack  of  some- 
thing, sir  ?  Mamma  !  order  them  to  bring  some  vodka,  and 
have  them  start  the  samovar;  and  we,  for  company's  sake, 
'11  just  take  a  thimbleful,  sir. — But  twenty-five  kopeks's  a 
lot,  sir ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Right  away,  my  dear,  right 
away  !  [She  goes  out. 

BoLSHOV.  But  what  are  you  talking  to  me  for:  of  course, 
I  know  it's  a  good  deal,  but  how  can  I  help  it  ?  They'll  put 
you  in  the  pen  for  a  year  and  a  half;  they'll  have  a  soldier 
lead  you  through  the  streets  every  week,  and  if  you  don't 
watch  out,  they'll  even  transfer  you  to  prison:  so  you'd  be 
glad  to  give  even  half  a  ruble.  You  don't  know  where  to 
hide  yourself  from  mere  shame. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna  enters  with  vodka;  Tishka 
brings  in  relishes,  and  goes  out. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  My  own  little  dove !  Eat, 
my  dear,  eat !     I  suppose  they  half  starve  you  there ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  Eat,  daddy!  Don't  be  particular;  we're 
offering  you  such  as  we  have. 

BoLSHOV.  Thanks,  Lazar,  thanks !  [He  driyiks]  Take  a 
drink  yourself. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Your  health !  [He  drinks]  Mamma,  won't 
you  have  some,  ma'am .''     Please  do  ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Holy  saints,  what  am  I  to 
do  now  ?  Such  is  the  will  of  God !  O  Lord,  my  God ! 
Ah,  my  own  little  dove,  you ! 


SCENE 


IV        ri  S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         297 


PoDKHALYUZiN.  Ah,  mamma,  God  is  merciful;  we'll  get 
out  of  it  somehow.     Not  all  at  once,  ma'am ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Lord  grant  we  may !  As  it 
is,  it  makes  me  pine  away  simply  looking  at  him. 

BoLSHOV.  Well,  what  about  it,  Lazar? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Ten  kopeks,  if  you  please,  I'll  give,  sir, 
as  we  said. 

BoLSHOV.  But  where  am  I  going  to  get  fifteen  more?  I 
can't  make  'em  out  of  door-mats. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Daddy,  I  can't  raise  'em,  sir !  God  sees 
that  I  can't,  sir ! 

BoLSHOV.  What's  the  matter,  Lazar?  What's  the  mat- 
ter?    What  have  you  done  with  the  money? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Now  you  just  Consider:  here  I'm  setting 
up  in  business — have  fixed  up  a  house.  But  do  have  some- 
thing to  eat,  daddy !  You  can  have  some  Madeira  if  you 
want  it,  sir !     Mamma,  pass  daddy  something. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Eat,  Samson  Silych,  dear ! 
Eat !     I'll  pour  out  a  little  punch  for  you,  dear ! 

BoLSHOV.  [Drinks]  Rescue  me,  my  children,  rescue  me ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Here,  daddy,  you  were  pleased  to  ask 
what  I  had  done  with  the  money? — How  can  you  ask,  sir? 
Just  consider  yourself:  I'm  beginning  to  do  business;  of 
course,  without  capital  it's  impossible,  sir;  there's  nothing 
to  begin  on.  Here,  I've  bought  a  house;  we've  ordered 
everything  that  a  good  house  ought  to  have,  horses,  and 
one  thing  and  another.  Just  consider  yourself !  One  has  to 
think  about  the  children 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Why,  daddy,  we  can't  strip 
ourselves  bare !  We're  none  of  your  common  towns- 
people. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Daddy,  please  consider:  to-day,  without 
capital,  sir,  without  capital  you  can't  do  much  business. 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  I  lived  with  you  until  I  was 


298  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  iv 

twenty  years  old,  daddy,  and  was  a  regular  stay-at-home. 
What,  would  you  have  me  give  back  the  money  to  you,  and 
go  about  again  in  calico-print  clothes  ? 

BoLSHOV.  What  are  you  saying  ?  Wliat  are  you  saying  ? 
Recollect !  You  see  I'm  not  asking  any  kindness  of  you, 
but  my  rights.     Are  you  human  beings  ? 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Why,  of  course,  daddy,  we're 
human  beings;  we're  not  animals. 

BoLSHOV.  Lazar,  you  just  recollect;  you  see,  I've  given 
away  everything  to  you,  fairly  wiped  my  slate  clean;  here's 
what  I've  got  left,  you  see !  You  see,  I  took  you  into  my 
house  when  you  were  a  little  rascal,  you  heartless  scoundrel ! 
I  gave  you  food  and  drink  as  if  I  were  your  own  father,  and 
set  you  up  in  the  world.  But  did  I  ever  see  any  sort  of  grati- 
tude in  you?  Did  I.''  Recollect,  Lazar,  how  many  times 
have  I  noticed  that  you  were  light-fingered !  What  of  it  ? 
I  didn't  drive  you  away  as  if  you  were  a  beast,  I  didn't 
tell  on  you  all  over  town.  I  made  you  my  head  clerk;  I 
gave  all  my  property  away  to  you;  and  to  you,  Lazar,  I 
gave  even  my  daughter,  with  my  own  hand.  If  you  hadn't 
received  permission  from  me,  you'd  never  have  dared  look 
at  her. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  If  you  plcasc,  daddy,  I  feel  all  that  very 
keenly,  sir. 

BoLSHOV.  Yes,  you  do!  You  ought  to  give  everything 
away  as  I  did,  and  leave  yourself  nothing  but  your  shirt, 
just  to  rescue  your  benefactor.  But  I  don't  ask  that,  I 
don't  need  to;  you  simply  pay  out  for  me  what's  expected 
now. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  And  why  shouldn't  I  pay,  sir?  Only 
they  ask  a  price  that's  wholly  unreasonable. 

BoLSHOv.  But  am  /  asking  it?  I  begged  out  of  every 
one  of  your  kopeks  I  could;  I  begged,  and  bowed  down  to 


SCENE  IV        IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         299 

their  feet;    but  what  can  I  do,  when  they  won't  come  down 
one  Httle  bit? 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  We  have  told  you,  daddy,  that 
we  can't  pay  more  than  ten  kopeks — and  there's  no  use  say- 
ing any  more  about  it. 

BoLSHOV.  And  so,  daughter,  you  say:  "Go  along  now, 
you  old  devil,  you,  into  the  pen !  Yes,  into  the  pen !  Off 
to  prison  with  him,  the  old  blockhead  !  And  it  serves  him 
right!" — Don't  chase  after  great  wealth,  be  contented  with 
what  you  have.  But  if  you  do  chase  after  wealth,  they'll 
take  away  the  last  you  have,  and  strip  you  clean.  And  it'll 
come  about  that  you'll  run  out  onto  the  Stone  Bridge,  and 
throw  yourself  into  the  river  Moscow.  And  they'll  haul 
you  out  by  your  tongue,  and  put  you  in  prison.  [All  are 
silent;  Bolshov  drinks]  But  you  just  think  a  bit:  what 
kind  of  a  walk  am  I  going  to  have  to  the  pen  now  ?  How 
am  I  going  to  shut  my  eyes.'  Now  the  Ilyinka  will  seem  to 
me  a  hundred  miles  long.  Just  think,  how  it  will  seem  to 
walk  along  the  Ilyinka !  It's  just  as  if  the  devils  were  drag- 
ging my  sinful  soul  through  torment;  Lord,  forgive  me  for 
saying  so  !  And  then  past  the  Iver  Chapel:^  how  am  I  going 
to  look  upon  her,  the  Holy  Mother.' — You  know,  Lazar; 
Judas,  you  see,  sold  even  Christ  for  money,  just  as  we  sell 
our  conscience  for  money.  And  what  happened  to  him  be- 
cause of  it.'^ — ^And  then  there  are  the  government  offices, 
the  criminal  tribunal ! — You  see,  I  did  it  with  set  purpose, 
with  malice  aforethought. — You  see,  they'll  exile  me  to  Si- 
beria. O  Lord  ! — If  you  won't  give  me  the  money  for  any 
other  reason,  give  it  as  charity,  for  Christ's  sake. 

[He  loeeps. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  What's  the  matter,  what's  the  matter, 
daddy  ?     There,    there,    now !     God    is    merciful !     What's 

'  In  which  there  is  a  mirucle-working  iniagc  of  the  Virgin. 


300  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  iv 

the  matter  with  you  ?     We'll  fix  it  up  somehow.     It's  all  in 
our  hands. 

BoLSHOV.  I  need  money,  Lazar,  money.  There's  nothing 
else  to  fix  it  with.     Either  money  or  Siberia. 

PoDKHALYUziN.  And  I'll  give  you  money,  sir,  if  you'll 
only  let  up.     As  it  is,  I'll  add  five  kopeks  more. 

BoLSHOV.  AVhat  have  we  come  to !  Have  you  any 
Christian  feeling  in  you .''  I  need  twenty-five  kopeks, 
Lazar ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  No,  daddy,  that's  a  good  deal,  sir;  by 
heaven,  that's  a  good  deal ! 

BoLSHOV.  You  nest  of  snakes ! 

[He  falls  with  his  head  upon  the  table. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Barbarian,  you  barbarian ! 
Robber  that  you  are  !  You  shan't  have  my  blessing  !  You'll 
dry  up,  money  and  all;  you'll  dry  up,  dying  before  j'our  time ! 
You  robber  !     Robber  that  you  are  ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  That'll  do,  mamma;  you're  angering  God. 
Why  are  you  cursing  me  when  you  haven't  looked  into  the 
business  ?  You  can  see  that  daddy  has  got  a  bit  tipsy,  and 
you  start  to  make  a  row. 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  It  would  be  better  for  you,  ma, 
to  keep  still !  You  seem  to  enjoy  sending  people  to  the  third 
hell.  I  know:  you'll  catch  it  for  this.  It  must  be  for  that 
reason  God  didn't  give  you  any  more  children. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Keep  still  yourself,  shame- 
less creature !  You  were  enough  of  a  punishment  for  God 
to  send  me ! 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  You  think  everybody's  shame- 
less and  that -you're  the  only  good  person.  But  you  ought 
to  take  a  good  look  at  yourself:  all  you  can  do  is  fast  one  day 
extra  every  week,  and  not  a  day  goes  by  that  you  don't 
bark  at  somebody. 


SCENE  IV      IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  301 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Shame  on  you !  Shame  on 
you  !     Oh  !     Oh  !     Oh  ! — I'll  curse  you  in  all  the  churches  ! 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Curse  away  if  you  want  to ! 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Yes,  that's  it!  You'll  die, 
and  not  rot !     Yes  ! 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Much  I  shall ! 

BoLSHOV.  [Rising]  Well,  good-by,  children ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  Why,  daddy,  sit  still !  We've  got  to 
settle  this  business  somehow  or  other. 

BoLSHOv.  Settle  what.'  I  see  plainly  enough  that  the 
jig  is  up.  You'll  make  a  mistake  if  you  don't  do  me  up 
brown!  Don't  you  pay  anything  for  me;  let  'em  do  what 
they  please.     Good-by,  it's  time  I  was  going. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Good-by,  daddy !  God  is  merciful — 
you'll  get  out  of  this  somehow. 

BoLSHOv.  Good-by,  wife. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Good-by,  Samson  Silych, 
dear !     When'U  they  let  us  come  to  see  you  in  jail  ? 

BoLSHOv.  Don't  know. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  Then  I'll  inquire,  otherwise 
you'll  die  there  without  our  seeing  you. 

BoLSHOv.  Good-by,  daughter !  Good-by,  Olimpiada 
Samsonovna !  Well,  now  you're  going  to  be  rich,  and  live 
like  a  princess.  That  means  assemblies  and  balls — devil's 
own  amusements !  But  don't  you  forget,  Olimpiada 
Samsonovna,  that  there  are  cells  with  iron  bars,  and  poor 
prisoners  are  sitting  in  them.  Don't  forget  us  poor  pris- 
oners, [lie  goes  out  with  Agrafena  Kondratyevna. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Ah!  Olimpiada  Samsonovna,  ma'am! 
How  awkward,  ma'am  !  I  i)ity  your  father,  by  heaven  I  pity 
him,  ma'am !  Hadn't  I  better  go  myself  and  compound 
with  his  creditors  ?     Don't  you  think  I'd  better,  ma'am  ? 


302         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  iv 

Yet  he  himself  will  soften  them  better.  Ah !  Or  shall  I 
go  ?     I'll  go,  ma'am  !     Tishka  ! 

Olimpiada  Samsonovna.  Do  just  as  you  please — it's 
your  business. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Tishka !  [Tishka  enters]  Give  me  my 
old  coat,  the  worst  one  there  is.  [Tishka  goes  out]  As  I  am, 
they'd  think  I  must  be  rich;  and  in  that  case,  there'd  be 
no  coming  to  terms. 

SCENE    V 

The  same,  Rispolozhensky  and  Agrafena  Kondratyevna 

RisPOLozHENSKY.  My  dear  Agrafena  Kondratyevna, 
haven't  you  pickled  your  cucumbers  yet.-^ 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna.  No,  my  dear.  Cucumbers 
now,  indeed !  What  do  I  care  about  them !  But  have  you 
pickled  yours  ? 

Rispolozhensky.  Certainly  we  have,  my  dear  lady. 
Nowadays  they're  very  dear;  they  say  the  frost  got  them. 
My  dear  Lazar  Elizarych,  how  do  you  do  ?  Is  that  vodka  ? 
I'll  just  take  a  thimbleful,  Lazar  Elizarych. 

Agrafena  Kondratyevna  goes  out  with  Olimpiada 
Samsonovna. 

Podkhalyuzin.  Why  is  it  you've  favored  us  with  a  visit, 
may  I  inquire.'' 

Rispolozhensky.  He,  he,  he ! — ^What  a  joker  you  are, 
Lazar  Elizarych  !     Of  course  you  know  why. 

Podkhalyuzin.  And  what  may  that  be,  I  should  like  to 
know,  sir.'' 

Rispolozhensky.  For  money,  Lazar  Elizarych,  for  money! 
Anybody  else  might  come  for  something  different,  but  I 
always  come  for  money  ! 

Podkhalyuzin.  You  come  mighty  blamed  often  for  money. 


SCENE  V         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         303 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  How  can  I  help  it,  Lazar  Elizarych, 
when  you  give  me  only  five  rubles  at  a  time?  You  see  I 
have  a  family. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  You  couldn't  expect  me  to  give  j'ou  a 
hundred  at  a  time  ! 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  If  you'd  give  it  to  me  all  at  once,  I 
shouldn't  keep  coming  to  you. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  You  know  about  as  much  about  business 
as  a  pig  does  about  pineapples;  and  what's  more,  you  take 
bribes.     Why  should  I  give  you  anything.'' 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  Why,  indeed ! — You  yourself  promised 
to! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  I  myself  promised  !  Well,  I've  given  you 
money — you've  made  your  profit,  and  that'll  do;  it's  time 
to  turn  over  a  new  leaf. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  What  do  you  mean  by  "time  to  turn 
over  a  new  leaf".'*     You  still  owe  me  fifteen  hundred  rubles. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Owe  you  !  Owe  you  !  As  if  you  had  some 
document!     And  what  for?     For  your  rascality! 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  What  do  you  mean  by  "rascahty  "  ?  For 
my  toil,  not  for  my  rascality ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Your  toil ! 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  Well,  whatever  it  may  be  for,  just  give 
me  the  money,  or  a  note  for  it. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  What,  sir !  A  note !  Not  much,  you 
come  again  when  you're  a  little  older. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  Do  you  want  to  swindle  me  with  my 
little  children  ? 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Swindle,  indeed !  Here,  take  five  rubles 
more,  and  go  to  the  devil. 

RisPOLOZHENSKY.  No,  Wait!  You'll  not  get  rid  of  me 
with  that. 

TiSHKA  enters. 


304  IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR  act  iv 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  What  are  you  going  to  do  to  me? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Mv  tongue  isn't  bought  up  yet. 

PoDKHALYuziN.  Oh,  perhaps  you  want  to  Hek  me,  do  you  ? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  No,  not  Hck  you,  but  to  tell  the  whole 
thing  to  all  respectable  people. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  What  are  you  going  to  talk  about,  you 
son  of  a  sea-cook  !     And  who's  going  to  believe  you  ? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Who's  going  to  believe  me.^ 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Yes  !  Who's  going  to  believe  you  ?  Just 
take  a  look  at  yourself ! 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Who's  going  to  believe  me.'*  Who's 
going  to  believe  me  ?  You'll  see !  Yes,  you'll  see !  Holy 
saints,  but  what  can  I  do  ?  It's  my  death  !  He's  swindling 
me,  the  robber,  swindling  me !  No,  you  wait !  You'll  see  ! 
It's  against  the  law  to  swindle ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  But  what'll  I  see  ? 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Here's  what  you'll  see !  You  just 
wait,  just  wait,  just  wait !  You  think  I  won't  have  the  law 
on  you  ?     You  wait ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Wait;  yes,  wait ! — As  it  is,  I've  waited 
long  enough.     Quit  your  bluffing,  you  don't  scare  me. 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  You  think  no  one  will  believe  me." 
Won't  believe  me  ?  Well,  let  'em  insult  me  !  I — here's  what 
I'll  do:  Most  honorable  public! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  What're  you  doing  ?  What're  you  doing .'' 
Wake  up ! 

TisHKA.  Shame  on  you;  you're  just  running  around 
drunk ! 

RispoLOZHENSKY.  Wait,  wait ! — Most  honorable  public  ! 
I  have  a  wife,  four  children — look  at  these  miserable  boots  ! — 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  All  lies,  gentlemen  !  A  most  dishonorable 
man,  gentlemen !  That'll  do  for  you,  that'll  do ! — You'd 
better  look  out  for  yourself  first,  and  see  what  you're  up  to ! 


SCENE  V         IT'S    A    FAMILY    AFFAIR         305 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  Lemiiie  go  !  He  plundered  his  father- 
in-law  !  And  he's  swindling  me. — A  wife,  four  children, 
worn-out  boots  ! 

TiSHKA.  You  can  have  'em  half-soled. 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  Wliat're  you  talking  about  .^  You're 
a  swindler,  too ! 

TiSHKA.  Not  at  all,  sir;  never  mind. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Oh  !     But  what  are  you  moralizing  about  'i 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  No,  you  wait!  I'll  remember  j'ou ! 
I'll  send  you  to  Siberia ! 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  Don't  believe  him,  it's  all  lies,  gentlemen  ! 
There,  gentlemen,  he's  a  most  dishonorable  man  himself, 
gentlemen;  he  isn't  worth  your  notice!  Bah,  my  boy, 
what  a  lout  you  are !  Well,  I  never  knew  you — and  not  for 
any  blessings  on  earth  would  I  have  anything  to  do  with  you. 

RiSPOLOZHENSKY.  Hold  on  there,  hold  on !  Take  that, 
you  dog !  Well,  may  you  be  strangled  with  my  money,  and 
go  to  the  devil !  \He  goes  out. 

PoDKHALYUZiN.  How  mad  he  got !  [To  the  public]  Don't 
you  believe  him,  I  mean  him  who  was  talking,  gentlemen — 
that's  all  lies.  None  of  that  ever  happened.  He  must  have 
seen  all  that  in  a  dream.  But  now  we're  just  opening  a 
little  shop:  favor  us  with  your  patronage.  Send  the  baby 
to  us,  and  we  won't  sell  him  a  wormy  apple ! 


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